Author Topic: A random thread for small things that don't really warrant a thread of their own  (Read 2945577 times)

Tim Hall

  • Victoria is my queen
And was he wearing a plastic hat?

Well, I'm guessing his balaclava was probably made out of nylon.

I've been thinking of hiring a digger for some garden landscaping. I suspect I would end up leaving our house looking in a similar state. They don't look like easy machines to control.
Hire mini digger.
After several hours realise the work completed thus far isn't enough to complete the work needed in the time allowed.
Phone digger hire company and take them up on their kind offer to send an operator for £not much really.
Job completed in an afternoon. No houses damaged, no one goets hurt.

(All IME)
There are two ways you can get exercise out of a bicycle: you can
"overhaul" it, or you can ride it.  (Jerome K Jerome)

T42

  • Apprentice geezer
But did you get into the ATM?
I've dusted off all those old bottles and set them up straight

Tim Hall

  • Victoria is my queen
But did you get into the ATM?

Heh.  In my last job I got involved in a project to secure ATM/Internet booths which were to replace phone boxes, to the ground. The BT phone box has a standard concrete slab foundation and it was thought unwise to have twenty grand in notes just resin bolted to such a a slab.  My employer made ground anchors which go several metres into the ground and we turn up at a trial with some anchors. There's a standard foundation slab, drilled to accept a couple of anchors, the safe part of an ATM and a JCB 3CX, complete with driver.  Anchors get installed, tested to 70kN and fixed to the ATM. The JCB driver is instructed to try to attempt to remove the ATM by applying force "here", indicated by the Man In Charge.  The ATM remains in place. Success!.  However the JCB driver, who seemed to know A Lot about these things, said he wouldn't apply the force "here" he'd applying it "here" instead. Boom! ATM goes flying off the slab.  We didn't here any more of that project.
There are two ways you can get exercise out of a bicycle: you can
"overhaul" it, or you can ride it.  (Jerome K Jerome)

T42

  • Apprentice geezer
I've dusted off all those old bottles and set them up straight

So the Hermes tracking says 'Left securely in outbuilding', so it's a choice of:

1) Driver has broken into the shed and now needs new underwear due to the anti bike thief device
b) Driver has brought a chainsaw and managed to get into the greenhouse
iii) Driver has thrown it over the gate
4) Driver has put it in the bin

Place your bets please.

I'm hoping for b) but my money is on 4)

ian

In my ongoing stories of bananas (one of the few perks of my occasion forays up the mothership is the daily fruit box), my colleague did actually use the words 'is that a banana in your pocket, or are you pleased to see me' with an admirably straight face.

And I did have an actual banana in my pocket. Which I sort of hope she knew.

Tomorrow, we chat with HR.

Mr Larrington

  • A bit ov a lyv wyr by slof standirds
  • Custard Wallah
    • Mr Larrington's Automatic Diary
In my ongoing stories of bananas (one of the few perks of my occasion forays up the mothership is the daily fruit box), my colleague did actually use the words 'is that a banana in your pocket, or are you pleased to see me' with an admirably straight face.

And I did have an actual banana in my pocket. Which I sort of hope she knew.


Do not drop the bananananana.
External Transparent Wall Inspection Operative & Mayor of Mortagne-au-Perche
Satisfying the Bloodlust of the Masses in Peacetime

lou boutin

  • Les chaussures sont ma vie.
It is official.  The can we/ we can't we/ perhaps we can change your contract discussions have been concluded and I am now officially an Associate Professor.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Ride adventurously and stop for a brew.
Congratulations!
Riding a concrete path through the nebulous and chaotic future.

lou boutin

  • Les chaussures sont ma vie.
Thank you.   ;D

Mrs Pingu

  • Who ate all the pies? Me
    • Twitter
Hurrah!
Do not clench. It only makes it worse.

ElyDave

  • Royal and Ancient Polar Bear Society member 263583
Cool! :thumbsup:
“Procrastination is the thief of time, collar him.” –Charles Dickens

woo, and yet hoo, that's great.

lou boutin

  • Les chaussures sont ma vie.
Thank you all.

Basil

  • Um....err......oh bugger!
  • Help me!
Tonight during the gym session.
Trainer: You're  not working hard tonight.
Me: I don't want to put on any upper body muscle.  I've just been measured for a suit for my son's wedding.
Trainer:  ::-) I wouldn't worry.   :facepalm:
Me:  :(
Admission.  I'm actually not that fussed about cake.

Torslanda

  • Professional Gobshite
  • Just a tart for retro kit . . .
    • John's Bikes
Thank you all.

Warmest congratulations. Well done!
VELOMANCER

Well that's the more blunt way of putting it but as usual he's dead right.

 :thumbsup:   Congratulations.
Not fast & rarely furious

tweeting occasional in(s)anities as andrewxclark

 :thumbsup:

lou boutin

  • Les chaussures sont ma vie.
Thank you.  It's been a bit of a journey.  I am an administrator, so I put the cat amongst the pigeons doing this.  At one point they had some difficulties with my contract, but that is all sorted and I was promoted a few days ago.

essexian

Things could get strange.... I am in charge at work today as all of the management are away.

Ideas for strangeness gratefully received.

So the Hermes tracking says 'Left securely in outbuilding', so it's a choice of:

1) Driver has broken into the shed and now needs new underwear due to the anti bike thief device
b) Driver has brought a chainsaw and managed to get into the greenhouse
iii) Driver has thrown it over the gate
4) Driver has put it in the bin

Place your bets please.

I'm hoping for b) but my money is on 4)

Yep in the cardboard bin

T42

  • Apprentice geezer
It is official.  The can we/ we can't we/ perhaps we can change your contract discussions have been concluded and I am now officially an Associate Professor.

Wow!  Congrats.
I've dusted off all those old bottles and set them up straight

ian

Things could get strange.... I am in charge at work today as all of the management are away.

Ideas for strangeness gratefully received.

Start with a banana.

Congratulations.
<i>Marmite slave</i>

essexian

Things could get strange.... I am in charge at work today as all of the management are away.

Ideas for strangeness gratefully received.

Start with a banana.

Well I have been asked for a decision regarding what type of Jam we put on the scones which are available in our Cardiff office..... none of us work anywhere near Cardiff. I am finding it very difficult to decide.

Does that mean I am not cut out for management?