Author Topic: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists  (Read 369304 times)

paul851

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1125 on: 10 October, 2016, 07:49:18 am »
The very helpful motorcyclist who bothered to stop on the opposite side of the road on Sunday as 3 of us crawled up Waddington fell on the Season of Mists Audax to tell us to "ride in single file otherwise we would die" even though we were riding in single file ?

Paul

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1126 on: 10 October, 2016, 08:26:24 am »
Not an oik (a well-spoken old man) and not shouted (he spoke quietly and politely) but I think it counts. I was stopped for a sarnie when said man parked beside me and got out to use the same shop. He walked up to me and said "I passed you a little while ago. You really should wear 'hi viz' - you're very hard to see without it". I was wearing a white jacket over a white jersey. I pointed out (equally politely) that white is the most high visibility colour in the spectrum, but he just looked confusedly at me and walked on.
Eddington Number = 132

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1127 on: 10 October, 2016, 01:41:02 pm »
<pedant>
When was white in the spectrum?

Green OTOH is the most visible light in the spectrum.

Dave_C

  • Trying to get rid of my belly... and failing!
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1128 on: 26 October, 2016, 10:32:31 am »
*** Role Reversal ***

Cyclists Shouting Stuff at Oiks

Spotted an Oik on a BMX, hoody, jeans, no lights, reflective or head gear.

Me lastnight riding home in the dark "Oi!! Get some Effin lights!!"

Oik "eh.....??"

@DaveCrampton < wot a twit.
http://veloviewer.com/athlete/421683/

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1129 on: 06 November, 2016, 06:34:26 pm »
On Friday I donated a substantially volumed "Tosser!" to an oncoming rider on CS2 around Tower Hill, who decided to weave through crossing pedestrians against a red light.

Kim

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Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1130 on: 18 November, 2016, 04:39:44 pm »
Kim rounds corner on the psyclepath to spot a group of schoolkids trying to ignite an aerosol and flamethrower a wooden signpost.
Oik 1 spots Kim:
"Hey, have you seen this trick?"  *fails to ignite aerosol in Kim's general direction*
"Many times.  It works better if you aim it downwind."
"..."
"...Actually, there's a racist sticker on a lamp post back there, why don't you go and burn that?"
"... ..."
Kim rides off, having done her bit for corrupting today's yoof.

Phil W

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1131 on: 18 November, 2016, 04:54:06 pm »
Not an oik (a well-spoken old man) and not shouted (he spoke quietly and politely) but I think it counts. I was stopped for a sarnie when said man parked beside me and got out to use the same shop. He walked up to me and said "I passed you a little while ago. You really should wear 'hi viz' - you're very hard to see without it". I was wearing a white jacket over a white jersey. I pointed out (equally politely) that white is the most high visibility colour in the spectrum, but he just looked confusedly at me and walked on.

And I would have responded, I am you should have gone to Specsavers

Wowbagger

  • Former Sylph
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Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1132 on: 18 November, 2016, 09:49:02 pm »
Telling you he'd just moved up north from Billericay?

Eta: In case of offended Billericatians, I'm thinking of Billericay Dickie.
Note for Wowbagger: This is a reference to a song by Ian Dury, Essex's third most famous Popular Beat Combo after Bobb and William Byrd.

I'll have you know, if you didn't already, that not only was I born in Billericay but also that I am a great admirer of the late Dury I. Some time about 1980, when I was the sole music teacher in a boys' sec mod, I invited the kids at the end of term to bring in their choice of music. I am pleased to say that no senior staff were within earshot when the melodic strains of Plaistow Patricia wafted their way out of the lo-fi with which my music room was ill-equipped.

I also think you might like to revise your top Essex pbcs, as Dr. Feelgood and Procul Harum are also from around these parts. Not to mention Suzi Quatro* and Barrington Pheloung.

*resident very close to the Compasses, Littley Green, spiritual home of the MEMW reprobates.
Quote from: Dez
It doesn’t matter where you start. Just start.

Andrij

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Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1133 on: 18 November, 2016, 09:57:20 pm »
Last night I had to give a verbal warning to someone who had stumbled onto CS2.  As I passed his group a few (all?) of them shouted "Oggie oggie oggie!"  I did the only sensible thing, and replied "Oi oi oi!".  :D
;D  Andrij.  I pronounce you Complete and Utter GIT   :thumbsup:

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1134 on: 19 November, 2016, 01:54:40 pm »
I had 'flat tyre, flat tyre, flat tyre' ad nauseam delivered in a rather weird monotone from one a group of schoolboys the other day.
The whole thing was a bit weird, to be honest.
"No matter how slow you go, you're still lapping everybody on the couch."

Phil W

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1135 on: 19 November, 2016, 06:25:44 pm »
The Tiger bell on my wheelchair has disintegrated. I so need a replacement!

I had a tiger horn on my bike a few years back. Used it in a park and two old ladies looked up into the sky and exclaimed, "well I can't see the geese " used horn again "well I still can't see them..."

Wycombewheeler

  • PBP-2019 LEL-2022
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1136 on: 20 November, 2016, 10:13:23 pm »
It's dragons that be in south London, not tigers.  Tigers come from Indiah, as any fule kno.

Apart from USAnian tourists visiting Africa, who seem notorious for escaping this factoid.
I heard they were in Kenya
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbYtASAakAI

Eddington  127miles, 170km

mattc

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Has never ridden RAAM
---------
No.11  Because of the great host of those who dislike the least appearance of "swank " when they travel the roads and lanes. - From Kuklos' 39 Articles

Oaky

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Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1138 on: 21 November, 2016, 09:59:13 am »
Note for Wowbagger: This is a reference to a song by Ian Dury, Essex's third most famous Popular Beat Combo after Bobb and William Byrd.

I also think you might like to revise your top Essex pbcs, as Dr. Feelgood and Procul Harum are also from around these parts. Not to mention Suzi Quatro* and Barrington Pheloung.

You mis-spelled Depeche Mode and Nitzer Ebb.
You are in a maze of twisty flat droves, all alike.

85.4 miles from Marsh Gibbon

Audax Club Mid-Essex Fire Safety Officer
http://acme.bike

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1139 on: 05 December, 2016, 08:44:12 am »
From quite a few this morning...."like your tree!"

(cf the fettle thread)

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1140 on: 08 December, 2016, 06:49:40 am »
Collected one from a bike-mounted policeman last night - does that count as a super-oik?

Andrij

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Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1141 on: 08 December, 2016, 08:27:25 am »
Thank would be 'oink' shouting stuff at cyclist.  ;)


With apologies to forumites who work(ed) for of the constabulary.
;D  Andrij.  I pronounce you Complete and Utter GIT   :thumbsup:

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1142 on: 16 December, 2016, 05:50:11 pm »
Quote
You'll get yourself killed

From the gent in his late 70s who had just gotten off the bus.

Pingu

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Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1143 on: 12 January, 2017, 10:31:58 am »
Smoking taxi driver standing outside his vehicle with the engine left running pointed out I wasn't wearing a magic hat  :demon:

Kim

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Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1144 on: 17 January, 2017, 04:10:03 pm »
"Your shoelace is undone!"

It wasn't.  How droll.

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1145 on: 17 January, 2017, 05:05:01 pm »
Telling you he'd just moved up north from Billericay?

Eta: In case of offended Billericatians, I'm thinking of Billericay Dickie.
Note for Wowbagger: This is a reference to a song by Ian Dury, Essex's third most famous Popular Beat Combo after Bobb and William Byrd.

I'll have you know, if you didn't already, that not only was I born in Billericay but also that I am a great admirer of the late Dury I. Some time about 1980, when I was the sole music teacher in a boys' sec mod, I invited the kids at the end of term to bring in their choice of music. I am pleased to say that no senior staff were within earshot when the melodic strains of Plaistow Patricia wafted their way out of the lo-fi with which my music room was ill-equipped.

I also think you might like to revise your top Essex pbcs, as Dr. Feelgood and Procul Harum are also from around these parts. Not to mention Suzi Quatro* and Barrington Pheloung.

*resident very close to the Compasses, Littley Green, spiritual home of the MEMW reprobates.

You forgotted  Depeche Mode , originating from Basildon.  htps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Depeche_Mode

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1146 on: 18 January, 2017, 11:09:37 am »
Young person (13?) in procession coming out of school. Not unpleasantly (in fact cheered me up):

"You're too old to be riding a bike!"

And me not 75 till next month.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Ride adventurously and stop for a brew.
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1147 on: 24 February, 2017, 07:19:10 pm »
Telling you he'd just moved up north from Billericay?

Eta: In case of offended Billericatians, I'm thinking of Billericay Dickie.
Note for Wowbagger: This is a reference to a song by Ian Dury, Essex's third most famous Popular Beat Combo after Bobb and William Byrd.

I'll have you know, if you didn't already, that not only was I born in Billericay but also that I am a great admirer of the late Dury I. Some time about 1980, when I was the sole music teacher in a boys' sec mod, I invited the kids at the end of term to bring in their choice of music. I am pleased to say that no senior staff were within earshot when the melodic strains of Plaistow Patricia wafted their way out of the lo-fi with which my music room was ill-equipped.

I also think you might like to revise your top Essex pbcs, as Dr. Feelgood and Procul Harum are also from around these parts. Not to mention Suzi Quatro* and Barrington Pheloung.

*resident very close to the Compasses, Littley Green, spiritual home of the MEMW reprobates.

You forgotted  Depeche Mode , originating from Basildon.  htps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Depeche_Mode
I simply didn't know Depeche Mode were from Essex (though it certainly fits). Wowbagger might shy away from them because of their alleged far-right sympathies (which actually seem to be far-right sympathies for kinky sadomasochistic sex... ).
Riding a concrete path through the nebulous and chaotic future.

SoreTween

  • Most of me survived the Pennine Bridleway.
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1148 on: 07 March, 2017, 11:17:37 pm »
Plodding gently up an incline this evening something lent out of a passing car to advise: 'Oi darling, if you go any slower you'll be going backwards!'

Now normally I wouldn't give the opinion of this insect any more thought than I give the opinion of the insects under rocks, in the bushes or flying above my head.  But on this occasion the insect amused me.  Having left my gym gear behind this morning I'd travelled at a good warmup pace back to digs then back to town & gym.  After a 45 minute spin class pinging the rev limiter I spent a further 45 minutes investigating the constant watts program on another bike in zone 4-5.

Mr Insect has probably rarely been so accurate.

 
2023 targets: Survive. Maybe.
There is only one infinite resource in this universe; human stupidity.

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #1149 on: 08 March, 2017, 08:16:28 am »
Me, yesterday, when passed with about 1" clearance by a racing snake in Richmond Park.

"Closer please!"

"What"

"Can you get closer next time ?"

"Mumble mumble"

"You were too close."

"Where's your helmet ?"

"OH FUCK OFF."

I chased him down (I was out for a slow pootle) and took issue with him on this. His response ?

"I'm a professional bike rider. I know what I'm doing."

Twat.
Rust never sleeps