Well, I think my ride report is basically the opposite of Bikey Mikey's
I have never eaten as much on an Audax as this one. I blame this on Undulate's great choice of controls and the efforts of the many willing helpers, as well as my own pigginess!
Instead of a ride punctuated by stops I found this to be a food-fest divided by a few lumpy bike rides instead.
1. Upton Magna - Shobdon airfield
We managed to get in the first group for the off, which had the advantage of being able to check out the derrière of every rider who started the event as they passed us
Jonah was particularly impressive on his fixie as he stormed past.
I ate a full English breakfast and latte at the control.
Gave way to a light aircraft as we rode along the runway to leave.
2. Shobdon - Builth Wells
The skoggy lane of doom caused some slippage of our rear wheel but we stayed upright. On the descent I told Simon to slow down because I didn't want to die today (had I known what was to come I might have kept my mouth shut).
We controlled at a garage that made very hot coffee and sold Cadburys Creme Eggs. I bought a roll of cling film and applied it to the top of my boots to keep out the impending rainfall. Perhaps one of the weirder items seen on an Audax receipt....
3. Builth Wells - Devils Staircase checkpoint
It pretty much rained from BW to the finish. I didn't care because I had my cling film.
There was great cake at the checkpoint, I ate some and washed it down with black currant squash then sacrilegiously walked up the 25% section of the staircase. We chatted to Wilkyboy on The way up who heroically attempted to ride it on his Brompton but didn't quite make the first hairpin. Once past the worst we were able to remount and not walk anything else, which I suppose was good on a tandem. According to Peter our tandem is long. Someone else called us a tank. My left ITB started to really hurt, and I bitched a bit at Simon as we rode. I think he wished he had brought his noise cancelling headphones. We saw a lot of Iddu in this section, and saw him make his Larrington Manouvre.
4. Devils Staircase - Tregaron
We saw no Tregaron Mountain Toads. We didn't even see any frogs, which from other people's reports leads me to fear we mullered several unknowingly. My ITB was very sore when we arrived, and the locals threatened to take pictures of us lying on the floor doing stretches.
I ate soup, roll with cheese and then cheese on toast with coffee. I was totally stuffed when we left.
3. Tregaron - Rhyader
The Elan Valley was really beautiful, even if the wind was whipping in the wrong direction along it. The rain wasn't heavy enough to obscure the view. I was truly glad we were out on the tandem not holed up at home watching Battlestar Galactica reruns in front of the fire (well sort of).
The Strand cafe had comfy leather sofas on which we dripped and scoffed soup, rolls, cheese and onion pastry and coffee. I was sad I had come ill equipped for Le Dopage, but Wilkyboy was able to kindly supply some Vitamin I. Strangely my ITB didn't hurt again on the ride or since. I must find out who supplies his Vitamin I since mine is clearly less potent
4. Rhyader - Little Brampton
Simon had a theory that if we made it as far as Rhyader in time then we would be fine. Feeling over-confident and relaxed due to this we availed ourselves fully of our time in hand to relax and pig out at these controls.
The helpers at Little Brampton were insanely organised and served up beef stew with apple crumble and custard desert and more coffee at impressive speed. It was so warm in there I could happily have stayed.
I staggered out and just about managed to get my leg over for the last section.
5. Little Brampton - Upton Magna
Simon cunningly said we could do the alternative route to avoid a bit if climbing and a tricky descent in the dark. Unfortunately there was still a lot of climbing to go, which was frankly unwelcome at this point. I was so relieved the only badger we saw was already dead. The funniest bit of the ride was watching Simon try to get off the bike at the finish. I think we need to get a frame protector for the top tube if we are going to do a ride like this again.
I had soup and a lovely cup of tea at the finish. We were touched by how pleased other riders were with our arrival within the time limit. I'm not sure whether they realised our tardiness was due to about 3 1/2 hours stopped stuffing our faces at controls!
Rows of snoring riders looked very comfy in the hall. We wondered if the epic cycling calf tattoo on display belonged to Jonah.
The 4 mile ride back to the Travelodge seemed an infeasibly long way and we had a hot bath and collapsed into an unconscious stupor. I've personally never felt so stuffed with food or so knackered after an Audax.
It was tough, but in so many ways so worth it.
Thanks to all the other yacf'ers and other riders who made it such a rich and friendly experience, and especially Undulates and all his helpers.
For me this was a must-do audax and probably at the limits of my abilities. It was great
