An entirely excellent day.
Met my friend Keith at the long stay car park and then The Lovely Annie at the ferry terminal. She then played the part of the hostess:
"Cyclisten, this is Tim. Tim this is Cyclisten. Hummers, (mwah, mwah) have you met Tim? Tim, this is Hummers"
until it was time to board the Saucy Sue. The sea was generally flat, with occasional lumps and the crossing is only 20 minutes, but this was enough to render TLA poorly and Not Happy. We ground up to The Needles where TLA had to face another of her betes noire - vertigo. The road down has airy views of the oggin below but she coped admirably. Heading East towards Bembridge we had the benefit of a tail wind and TLA increased in happiness, the telltale sign for which being the increase in Burbling Chatter.
Bembridge Cafe hove in to view, where we spied Hummers, waiting for waxing, or gaffa tape - which ever was handiest. We declined and went in hunt of Beans on Toast, of which there were none, so I scoffed some bread pudding instead. I then applied soothing ungents to TLA's poorly shoulder, making her yelp when I got to the hurty bit.
Keith was riding very strongly and we reminisced about various tandem club rides we'd done on the island, especially as we were using some of the white on blue Round the Island signs, shown as WoB on the route card.These were renamed WowBagger signs.
And then it was Cowes and the chain ferry. TLA was a bit perturbed by this, but managed by closing her eyes. Burbling Chatter was soon in full flow again as we headed towards Yarmouth. On the approach we wound Richard of Wiltshire into our gruppetto, and having witnessed that nice Mr. Hummers baring his flesh on the foredeck of the Saucy Sue and Running Away before he could reprise "My Heart Will go On" inna Kate Winslett stylee we legged it to a cafe for BoT. Time was running away so we impressed on the Bright Young Thing serving us that we needed food Now. It duly arrived and I warned TLA that we'd have to hurry. She claimed to be a fast eater. Pah. And there's me holder of several medals for scoffing. I won. We legged it skedaddled to the ferry and nearly got run over on the slip way.
Burbling chatter gradually increased as we put our nautical adventures behind us and we headed into the Forest and up the Ornamental Drive. Some seriously nice trees and a seriously steep step as we got to the top, causing intemperate language. Then wooshing downwards towards the Red Shoot, Mockbeggar and out of the Forest. The lanes wandered around, as did we, willing the control to get here sooner.
A nasty steep kick as we hit the edge of the downs caused one of our number to exclaim, loudly "Who the shpxing hell put that there!". I won't let on who it was, but Burbling Chatter was reduced for a while.
The Sheaf of Arrows had us down a quick drink and application of more soothing ungents to TLA's shoulder. Cue more yelping as I found the hurty bit again. We whizzed on, pausing for a navigation check after taking a turn too early. We knew where we were, but weren't sure where that was on the route card. The Blokes of the team consulted the map, whilst TLA said "it's this way", and so it was.
Once into Ringwood we got organised into a pace line, like Proper Cyclists and hammered down the final kilometres (or miles for those with a hankering for imperial units). We were buzzing. Discussions with Keith identified the factors involved: End in sight, slight down hill, tailwind and our own invincibility.
Going through Milford on Sea we spied a shop called Doggy Fashions. Which was nice.
Hitting the coast we were rewarded with a magnificent view of the Isle of Wight bathed, or at least lightly showered, in sunshine. The Needles battery was clearly visible. Gosh, we were up there this morning.
TLA took the lead on the last bit, zooming off up the Ancient Highway, and guiding us unerringly to the Arrivee for tea, pasta and lashings of rice pudding. We were possibly holders of the lanterne rouge, although there may have been one other rider still out on the course. I didn't care. I'd had an excellent day, in excellent company.
