The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread

[Ham]

I'm curious, where does this sit on the divviness continuum? Take a new packet of cling film and rip off the cutter instead of opening the box.

[Torslanda]

Depends whether you had already destroyed the old box...

[Basil]

I'm curious, where does this sit on the divviness continuum? Take a new packet of cling film and rip off the cutter instead of opening the box.

Top divving, Ham.   

[Kim]

Depends on whether you use the cutter, I suppose.

Barakta and I have a compromise: I don't moan about the clingfilm living boxless and requiring unpredictable hand-ripping, and she doesn't bin the box for the foil.

[Torslanda]

So. Last night I reserved my hire van for the BHPC weekend. Usual online stuff, pick a depot, pick a vehicle, confirm collection time. Easy gig.

'Complete your reservation'. Pay now or later? Hmm, later methinks.
Enter driver # & licence details. Expiry date. Hmm(2).

My driving entitlement runs until 2032 but the expiry date on teh photocard is May 2018.

'Do you need this letter?' sez Mrs. Torslanda - she of the horned helmet and heavy metal breastplate.

'Arse! Bum! Buggritt! Minnellium, hand & shrimp!' sez me. I'll be your dickhead for the day.

Dire warning from the gov.uk about driving with an expired photocard whilst still actually entitled to drive for the best part of another 15 years. Pay the 2 dollars & order new licence. Of course I'm going to cut the old one in half and send it back...

...but not before the new one arrives. I'm not that much of a feckin' div!

[pcolbeck]

Lost my boarding pass in Munich airport. Luckily Im flying Lufthansa not some cheap airline and the very efficient lady at the desk printed me a new one in 30 seconds.

[ian]

Don't boarding passes just mysterious appear on your phone these days?

[pcolbeck]

Don't boarding passes just mysterious appear on your phone these days?

Probably to do with the fact that my company bought the tickets for me.

[ian]

You should still get them when you check in? Even bouncing around Africa, I don't think I saw a real boarding pass. They do tend to insist on giving me a paper version if I check in a bag.

[essexian]

  Just got back from my early morning ride to discover that I had put my bibshorts on the wrong way around, so the front was at the back etc....

I thought they felt a bit tight across my chest!

[pcolbeck]

Just got back from my early morning ride to discover that I had put my bibshorts on the wrong way around, so the front was at the back etc....

I thought they felt a bit tight across my chest!

Still its better than putting them on the right way around then riding your bike backwards.

[citoyen]

Depends on whether you use the cutter, I suppose.

Barakta and I have a compromise: I don't moan about the clingfilm living boxless and requiring unpredictable hand-ripping, and she doesn't bin the box for the foil.

We have a permanent wall-mounted dispenser for foil and clingfilm. It's great. Instead of a cutting edge, it has a slider that provides a neat, straight cut every time. Boxes and their hateful cutters go straight in the recycling.

[citoyen]

My driving entitlement runs until 2032 but the expiry date on teh photocard is May 2018.

I realised on reading this that I have no idea when my photocard expires... just checked - April 2022. Phew.

Sure I'll forget again before then.

[T42]

Are photocards ID cards masquerading under another name?

--o0o--

Further to my "Super Twat" entry:

Removing surgical strapping with adhesive solvent is not to be recommended unless you have buckets of the stuff.  I'm recovering from a tear in one quad and I ran out yesterday with only enough on the strapping to dissolve the bond between the adhesive layer and the fabric.

Result: muggins standing breekless in the bathroom with a 6" wide spiral of tacky white adhesive encircling his right thigh and hands covered in it while missus hies off to two chemists' shops looking for more solvent. It took a full bottle, a nailbrush and a shower to remove the rest.

To be honest, one of the containers of solvent that we already had was in an aerosol can, so I couldn't see how much was in it, so dividity is not strictly proven.

Discovered later that Decathlon has excellent re-usable strapping that sticks to itself but not to the skin. At 4€ a pop it's 20% cheaper than the solvent and a hell of a lot less painful to remove.

[ElyDave]

should that be dividity or divinity?

[T42]

Depends on whether you suffer from hay fever or not.

[matthew]

I've come into work today without any of my painkillers.* starting to get rather sore, but fortunately I have to travel to site in a couple of hours which means driving past home so I can call in and pick them up.


* As I typed this I remembered the emergency stash in my office bag. Only one tablet so a half dose but hopefully it will take the edge of the discomfort.

You would have thought I would have learnt the first time.


And more importantly remembered to refresh the emergency supply. 

[ElyDave]

BIG does not = HIGH when farting around with rear mechs

That's all   

[Beardy]

Oh low... 

[lahoski]

It turns out that the best thing to do before a meeting is throw three quarters of a mug of fresh, real coffee all over my desk, laptop and actual lap. It's not as if I've done this several times a year for the last decade.

[PaulF]

Having just spent an hour trimming a few mm of a couple of wooden battens I remembered I have an electric plane

[Beardy]

Last night I watched 35 minutes of the ITV4 highlights programme before I realised it was a rest day!

[Mr Larrington]

After one and a half Tours de France (or, as *** and Super D might say, "Tour de Frances", because they are fecking divs) I have noticed that the Watchfinder-General wears a selection of different watches.

[rafletcher]

We have a recently adopted “rescue” cat. She is wearing the “cone of shame”. I gave her some “cat pate” to eat. The cone makes a cracking scoop.....   

[Torslanda]

... so keep it when she's finished wearing it.

For the cat pate litter tray!