Mid-Essex Mid-Week Nocturnal Series

[Oscar's dad]

...No drinking involved. ( i think it might be my age but I think I've gone off alcohol (shock horror!!))

Blimey, that's not good!  In an attempt to have a healthier lifestyle (not that our lifestyle is that unhealthy) me and The Current Mrs R decided to have booze free Mondays and Tuesday starting this week.  It was a miserable failure which made me very happy!  We'll try again next week.

I like the look of your Epping route, it might make a nice alternative.  Let me know how long it takes you.  I'd also be interested to know how you get on throuigh the Forest.  I've been that way a few times and noticed the drivers you meet aren't that nice.  Have a good ride!

[Old Git]

They are driving home to Retardville

[Christophe]

Done the Epping route quite a few times. Should take about 3 hours for Liverpool St.

That road can be quite busy but is a quick route out of London. Also it's nice and quiet once you're through Epping. Also takes you past most of the MEMWNS watering holes on the way!

[Oscar's dad]

Done the Epping route quite a few times. Should take about 3 hours for Liverpool St.

That road can be quite busy but is a quick route out of London. Also it's nice and quiet once you're through Epping. Also takes you past most of the MEMWNS watering holes on the way!

How did you get on last night?

[Christophe]

Pretty good ride home but not particularly fast! Managed 3 1/2 hours last night for 80km so probably got a bit of time to shave off there. Did the whole lot without stopping as well so was feeling it towards the end.
Even managed a touch of cramp in my thigh which I've never had before and not a pleasant experience!
All set for your ride tonight? Will you be arriving home in the wee small hours?

[Oscar's dad]

Pretty good ride home but not particularly fast! Managed 3 1/2 hours last night for 80km so probably got a bit of time to shave off there. Did the whole lot without stopping as well so was feeling it towards the end.
Even managed a touch of cramp in my thigh which I've never had before and not a pleasant experience!
All set for your ride tonight? Will you be arriving home in the wee small hours?

Great stuff, so you got home about 9:30? 

Yes, all set for tonight.  Arriving home in the wee small hours is not the plan but accidents do happen 

[Oscar's dad]

Last night's not-quite-mid-week ride was very pleasant.  Huggy and I wended our way to TMNH via the Nounsley ford which we skirted round.  At the bottom of TMNH we spotted a lorry from Expert Logistics in the ditch - oops.  In order to claim an official ascent we rode round the Generals Arms sign and carried on to turn right down Riffhams Chase.

We had to make a pit stop at The Compasses, Littlely Green as my Hope 1 was playing up.  After a battery swap, a pint and a chat with Kitchen Kevin who installed our kitchen a few years back we carried on to the King Billy.

My mate Dave was already there, propping up the bar.  We managed to find a table, the place was packed which is very heartening when you consider so many pubs are closing.  The King Billy doesn't do food so it is brilliant they can attract a pub full of drinkers on a Thursday night.  Alas they had no pies.

Tomsk turned up and exchanged books with Huggy, it would appear we have an embryonic book club on our hands - me thinks this is the top of a slippery slope.

At 10pm we dispersed into the night.  34 miles for me, a few pints and great company.  As I've said before I don't understand why more people don't do it.

[huggy]

Last night's not-quite-mid-week ride was very pleasant. 

+1 

Tomsk turned up and exchanged books with Huggy, it would appear we have an embryonic book club on our hands - me thinks this is the top of a slippery slope.

To be clear on the subject of the MEMWNS Book Club, I am more like an Orang-utan in my the partnership with Tomsk, as so far I have been the Librarian lending Discworld novels to Tomsk 
However, no bananas have been exchanged yet!

[Oscar's dad]

Tomsk turned up and exchanged books with Huggy, it would appear we have an embryonic book club on our hands - me thinks this is the top of a slippery slope.

To be clear on the subject of the MEMWNS Book Club, I am more like an Orang-utan in my the partnership with Tomsk, as so far I have been the Librarian lending Discworld novels to Tomsk 
However, no bananas have been exchanged yet!

I'm sure I shall regret asking this but what have Orang-utans got to do with anything?

[huggy]

Tomsk turned up and exchanged books with Huggy, it would appear we have an embryonic book club on our hands - me thinks this is the top of a slippery slope.

To be clear on the subject of the MEMWNS Book Club, I am more like an Orang-utan in my the partnership with Tomsk, as so far I have been the Librarian lending Discworld novels to Tomsk 
However, no bananas have been exchanged yet!

I'm sure I shall regret asking this but what have Orang-utans got to do with anything?

OD, you have clearly not entered in to the parallel omniverse that is Terry Pratchett's mind and The Discworld so just for you:

The Librarian is a faculty member, and so he must have once been a human wizard. A strong wave of magic, altering reality, transformed the Librarian into an orang-utan; at that time, his colleagues still remembered how he looked as a human (The Light Fantastic). Back then, wizards were much too busy to help him get back to his original human form (although there is no record of his asking for help, either). After things settled down, the Librarian's colleagues found that he liked being an orang-utan, and fought all efforts to transform him back to human. The Librarian found out that opposable toes come in very handy when climbing up the book-shelves and sorting books. Also, a very large and strong orang-utan has more plausible arguments when talking about dog-ears and overrun return deadlines. Although the senior wizards looked very hard for one, there are no rules in the university constitution forbidding an orang-utan to be a member of the college council.

The full biography of the Librarian can be found here because I know you're now fascinated 

[Oscar's dad]

   I knew I shouldn't have asked.  Can I make this quite clear, I struggle with this world never mind parallel universes full of disc and monkeys.  Those of you out there that can cope with such complexities have my admiration. 

I'm still trying to work out where all the pies went last night.  I bet the bloody monkey ate them.

[delthebike]

I'm still trying to work out where all the pies went last night.  I bet the bloody monkey ate them.

There's a monkey too? 

[Oscar's dad]

I'm still trying to work out where all the pies went last night.  I bet the bloody monkey ate them.

There's a monkey too? 

Apparently so.  It's a parallel universe innit?  I've now got no idea what's going on.

[delthebike]

Apparently so.  It's a parallel universe innit?  I've now got no idea what's going on.

You're just a Tourist then? 

[Oscar's dad]

   and I think    and maybe even    almost certainly 

[delthebike]

  and I think    and maybe even    almost certainly 

I bet your luggage is made of sapient cotton duck.

[Oscar's dad]

  and I think    and maybe even    almost certainly 

I bet your luggage is made of sapient cotton duck.

   and I think    and maybe even    almost certainly 

Ducks now!  As if monkeys weren't enough 

[токамак]

We had to make a pit stop at The Compasses, Littlely Green as my Hope 1 was playing up.

Ah, it was you I saw on my way home last night! I did suspect actually, I was nearly blinded by my own lights bouncing off your super-reflective kit and though to myself, I bet that's OD The good new is, it definitely works

[Oscar's dad]

We had to make a pit stop at The Compasses, Littlely Green as my Hope 1 was playing up.

Ah, it was you I saw on my way home last night! I did suspect actually, I was nearly blinded by my own lights bouncing off your super-reflective kit and though to myself, I bet that's OD The good new is, it definitely works

Would that have been just before we got to The Compasses? 

[Wowbagger]

Now you know why I took such an interest in The Lady of a Certain Age with the Pince-nez and the Hard Stare, od. I knew all along that she wasn't a man, as you asserted, but an orang utan.

[токамак]

Yes, I'd already passed The Compases when I saw two glowing cyclists loom out of the dark.

[Oscar's dad]

Just so you know, I'm ignoring you all now 

[Oscar's dad]

Yes, I'd already passed The Compases when I saw two glowing cyclists loom out of the dark.

Nice of you to stop for a chat 

[токамак]

I was really hungry and wanted to get home for some dinner!

[Oscar's dad]

I was really hungry and wanted to get home for some dinner!

We'll let you off!