Author Topic: The RANT thread (often contains fruity language) (Read 2959938 times)

arabella · « **Reply #11650 on:** 20 September, 2011, 09:25:23 am »

To the stupid woman who rear ended me this morning.

You rear ended me, so it WAS your fault.
I do not have reverse gear on a bicycle so it WAS your fault.
If you are driving so colse that you drove into the back of me then you are not paying enough attention to the road. So maybe I am lucky not to be completely squashed.

When I glared at you the polite thing would have been to a) mouth sorry at me and b) stop to exchange details. Instead of which you gave me a dirty look and drove off. I am not impressed. fortunately for you I was too shocked to get your number plate so I can't send a letter.

May you smell of fish, you trout.
May your bed be infested with bedbugs.
More importantly, may you realise the error of your ways and never do it again.

Now I have some mending to do. I find round tuits hard enough to come by without your lack of driving skills add further items to your list.
So I hope you spend the rest of today and the better part of tomorrow comatose with a headache. I hope you then ruin your favourite outfit.

Now I am going to blubber silently in the ladies.

Mrs Pingu · « **Reply #11651 on:** 20 September, 2011, 07:46:02 pm »

oh arabella, that's poo!
And don't blubber silently, it feels so much better if you have a good sob.

*offers bike mending cake*

clarion · « **Reply #11652 on:** 20 September, 2011, 08:40:49 pm »

Oh.

I thought I'd managed to post a response to this earlier from my phone, but clearly hadn't.

That's really rotten, and it's sad you haven't got her number to report it.

Glad you're still with us, though. And I hope your bike is OK too.

Sob away. It's a nasty situation, and people can just be utterly unpleasant sometimes. But it's rare, and I'm sure you do know that.

Hope you're back awheel soon.

Peter · « **Reply #11653 on:** 20 September, 2011, 08:45:30 pm »

Quote from: clarion on 20 September, 2011, 08:40:49 pm

Hope you're back awheel soon.

Further, I 'ope youra backa wheel's abacka wheel, weal soon! $:-\$

arabella · « **Reply #11654 on:** 21 September, 2011, 12:02:15 pm »

Feeling better now, thanks.
Just need to attach the mudguard together again with zip ties. Then santa can bring me a 2nd hand set (new would look wrong) in due course.

mrcharly-YHT · « **Reply #11655 on:** 21 September, 2011, 12:12:59 pm »

I can send you some 2nd-hand cable ties complete with oil stains and grubby fingermarks. Looks so much better than those shiny new ones some people insist on using. Even better, I have miscellaneous colours that *all* clash with my frame (that took some effort, I can tell you).

CrinklyLion · « **Reply #11656 on:** 21 September, 2011, 07:02:26 pm »

fucking broadband, fuck off!!!

new provider say that they can't take and process an order without a mac

old provider (contract in ex's name, and he has told them to cancel it) won't issue a mac. they say they can't until the service is no longer provided, on the 8th of next month

new provider says all i can do is wait for the old service to end, then i won't need a mac, or change my landline number, which i've had for 11 years.

edit to add - the utterly useless and ridiculously overpriced previous provider was eclipse, by the way. i heartily neither recommend nor endorse that company. and, as they say, if you get good service you might tell a few friends. if you get crap then you can tell the whole sodding world. if you have an internet connection, that is, which i shortly will not. yet a-fucking-gain

Cudzoziemiec · « **Reply #11657 on:** 21 September, 2011, 07:24:39 pm »

I can commiserate with that, CL, as 3 Connect, who have been wonderful up to now, decided to do some 'upgrading maintenance' at the beginning of this month, which left me with no connection whatsoever for three days and since then it's been patchy, often slow, and I usually have to sit in the middle of the room, whereas I really want to sit at the desk by the window. Some #@*&^%$£"! upgrade! And of course when I informed them, they took to phoning me everyday from India on the crackliest line imaginable. Lucky I'm familiar with the dialect or I wouldn't understand them at all - which wouldn't matter if they could only make it work.

Arch · « **Reply #11658 on:** 21 September, 2011, 07:25:29 pm »

Is it worth getting a mobile dongle? I live off mine, and don't have landline internet. I was given it, so I don't know how much it cost to buy, but I think it was fairly cheap. I spend about £10 a month, but there's no contract, it's PAYG, and mine (I'm with 3) allows a 'per day' option (which obviously works out more pricy). I guess you'd always have it as a back up - I don't know how long it can 'lie fallow' for though....

Also, of course, it depends on being able to get a signal ok - I rarely have trouble in the flat.

Cudzoziemiec · « **Reply #11659 on:** 21 September, 2011, 07:33:56 pm »

Quote from: Arch on 21 September, 2011, 07:25:29 pm

Is it worth getting a mobile dongle? I live off mine, and don't have landline internet. I was given it, so I don't know how much it cost to buy, but I think it was fairly cheap. I spend about £10 a month, but there's no contract, it's PAYG, and mine (I'm with 3) allows a 'per day' option (which obviously works out more pricy). I guess you'd always have it as a back up - I don't know how long it can 'lie fallow' for though....

Also, of course, it depends on being able to get a signal ok - I rarely have trouble in the flat.

The price to buy the dongle varies on the contract or deal, but the signal is the problem - even if it's there to begin with. See above.

CrinklyLion · « **Reply #11660 on:** 21 September, 2011, 07:40:52 pm »

they bloody charged a disconnection fee as well. and they were hideously expensive. gits.

what's the chances of a mobile dongle working reasonably well with a linux laptop, i wonder.

Kim · « **Reply #11661 on:** 21 September, 2011, 08:16:32 pm »

Wind: fuck off you utter bastard! What's the fucking point in getting up in the fucking morning (before fucking Tescos have any proper food, it appears) to grimp my way up a complete chevronny bastard of a climb to the top of the sodding Pennines, if you're only going to make me slow down to 10 miserable miles per hour to avoid getting blown under a fucking cement lorry? Seriously? That was supposed to be a fucking awesome descent, and I wasted it dragging the brakes and trying not to die like a fucking Londoner. For fuck's sake!

And my fucking phone doesn't want me to put the apostrophe in "fuck's". Useless!

Zipperhead · « **Reply #11662 on:** 21 September, 2011, 08:30:27 pm »

Quote from: CrinklyLion on 21 September, 2011, 07:40:52 pm

they bloody charged a disconnection fee as well. and they were hideously expensive. gits.

what's the chances of a mobile dongle working reasonably well with a linux laptop, i wonder.

If it's connecting over wifi then it will work without any problems.

I use mine as backup and to give me a decent connection away from home and it works a treat with laptops, ipods etc.

Tim Hall · « **Reply #11663 on:** 21 September, 2011, 09:53:43 pm »

Quote from: Kim on 21 September, 2011, 08:16:32 pm

trying not to die like a fucking Londoner.

Class. This made oi larf.

Jacomus · « **Reply #11664 on:** 22 September, 2011, 09:57:35 am »

Quote from: Tim Hall on 21 September, 2011, 09:53:43 pm

Quote from: Kim on 21 September, 2011, 08:16:32 pm
trying not to die like a fucking Londoner.

Class. This made oi larf.

+1

tiermat · « **Reply #11665 on:** 22 September, 2011, 10:04:53 am »

Quote from: CrinklyLion on 21 September, 2011, 07:40:52 pm

they bloody charged a disconnection fee as well. and they were hideously expensive. gits.

what's the chances of a mobile dongle working reasonably well with a linux laptop, i wonder.

I used my 3 one lots when I was working away, NetworkManager finds it fine as sets it all up for you. The only PITA is that sometime NM decides you really want to try and associate with a WAP(instead of using the 3G connection), usually when you are in the middle of a big email or the like. That can be sorted though, as you just tell NM to ~~fuck off~~ never use wireless.

FWIW I have the 3G dongle that you can use (if it comes to you having no internet connection) as I am on PAYM and never use it now I am at home all the time (and only in month 6of a 24 month contract....)

hellymedic · « **Reply #11666 on:** 22 September, 2011, 10:21:18 am »

Quote from: CrinklyLion on 21 September, 2011, 07:40:52 pm

they bloody charged a disconnection fee as well. and they were hideously expensive. gits.

what's the chances of a mobile dongle working reasonably well with a linux laptop, i wonder.

I don't use linux. David had to download software to get dongle to work with his Mac. He found it from some forum. Might be worth searching some linux fora.

jogler · « **Reply #11667 on:** 22 September, 2011, 10:53:32 am »

Quote from: Tim Hall on 21 September, 2011, 09:53:43 pm

Quote from: Kim on 21 September, 2011, 08:16:32 pm
trying not to die like a fucking Londoner.

Class. This made oi larf.

I

too.

tiermat · « **Reply #11668 on:** 22 September, 2011, 11:06:53 am »

Ignorant bastard neighbours.

I realise that when you have tradesmen around to have work done they need somewhere to put their vans, but allowing them to park ACROSS my frigging drive is just not on. If the shoe was on the other foot I would ask them not too, or make other arrangements. So why did I have to ask the electrician to move his van? Huh? WHY?

If the other one doesn't move soon (which is blocking my view down the road as I try to get out of the drive I will be around to ask him to move that one too.

The stupid thing is that you have space for at least one of the vans on your drive!

Kim · « **Reply #11669 on:** 22 September, 2011, 09:36:13 pm »

Wind: did you not get the memo? I deliberately avoided a shedload of climbing, and subsequent descending, on the basis that I didn't want to end up bleeding in a ditch with a b0rked bike twice in as many months. So turning around and blowing in my face for 4 hours, such that my average speed was actually lower than yesterday is just Not On. Bastard.

Some fucker at the met office is laughing at me, I just know it.

Torslanda · « **Reply #11670 on:** 22 September, 2011, 11:35:47 pm »

Is this the infamous bi-polar headwind ?

Mr Larrington · « **Reply #11671 on:** 23 September, 2011, 08:07:52 am »

And a good day to you, Mr Lexus-Driving-Cunt! You've been tailing that pick-up for about five minutes, so why in the name of the Black Hills of Dakota did you wait until I'd pulled out, indicator blinking a-blink-o, before you decided to overtake said pick-up? With my right foot welded to the floor, I missed rear-ending you by about two feet, and because I was the one at the rear of the line, it would have been my fault. You didn't indicate, and your side windows were so heavily tinted that you wouldn't have seen a woolly mammoth bearing down on you. And that, Sir, is why I indicating wanking when I overtook you. Because you are a worthless ignorant snivelling fuckpig who, in common with many a Thoughtless Motor-ist I have encountered in the past 48 hours, have no idea what a fucking mirror is. I hope the polis arrest you for driving under the influence of Richard Nixon and throw away the fucking key. Twat.

barakta · « **Reply #11672 on:** 23 September, 2011, 09:12:07 am »

I've been onna train and my mum's evil mattress of d00m. I can tell. My spines went to Cardassia and came back all NOBBLY!
In Stupid Amounts of pain all the way up and down my spine and too digestively dodgy (oh hai lactofail when away from home is annoying) to take NSAIDs so just the opiates then...
Need to drag my sorry arse and spines up the hill to work - deliberately late but even so...

ETA:nded up on the full 60mg codeine before I could fully inhale without pain and after a day of 3x colleagues being annoying it's kicking in again so I need to load up on yet moar codeine *scowl*

CAMRAMan · « **Reply #11673 on:** 23 September, 2011, 03:22:10 pm »

DWP: I phoned you to say I couldn't make my signing-on appointment yesterday afternoon in good time. I couldn't get there after 4pm, as I had to look after the kids because my partner was out of town unexpectedly. I put these basic facts down on your toilet paper-quality form today & then, and only then, did Heidi (who'd kept me waiting 10 minutes & would probably have kept me waiting longer had I not asked where she was) explain that I had to put all the facts down so that they could judge whether my reason for non-attendance was a worthy one and would not justify losing a week's benefit. Well, let me tell you, I shall appeal if you do that. Probably unsuccessfully, but I'll be a PITA for the sake of it.

hellymedic · « **Reply #11674 on:** 23 September, 2011, 03:38:20 pm »

Spammy phone caller from Indian call centre:

FUCK RIGHT OFF!

I don't have time for you and really resent the way your company has evaded TPS rules by basing you overseas.