Today's SPAM

[Ham]

Probably an application for a job in the helldesk, sounds eminently qualified to me.

[DaveReading]

Padding spam out with a ton of irrelevant, innocuous text is a well-known technique to get past spam-traps.

It clearly appears to have worked.   

[hatler]

Not quite. It went into the 'Suspended' bucket.

[Jaded]

It could be that their craniotomy has affected their thinking.

[Paul]

Can you ask them for the next chapter?

[Mr Larrington]

Can you ask them for the next chapter?

Hatler should pretend to be a publisher of avant-garde fiction

[hatler]

Can you ask them for the next chapter?

Bugger. Too late. Already permanently binned. Good thinking that. I'll look out for the next one.

[Paul]

Reminded me of If, On A Winter’s Night, A Traveller, but easier to follow.

[Genosse Brymbo]

Don't know how this one got past my employer's spam trap.  My own cerebral parser always stops at "reach out" and inflexions thereof.  The only problem is that the email is now categorised as bad language and not spam.

From: Yuriem Rodriguez
Subject: David, are you in?

Hi David,
On behalf of IBM, I am reaching out to gauge your interest in learning how to improve the security and speed at which your firm moves applications from development to production.
I have the authority, to reward you fifty dollars, simply to see if it is worth your time to evaluate IBM’s Onwire Application Security product.  (4 minute conversation)
What time, Thursday or Friday, is most convenient to reach out to you, for a 4 minute discussion?   
 
Thanks in advance for your time David.
 
Yuriem Rodriguez
Technology Solutions Coordinator
yuriem.rodriguez@itbr.com
336-930-7299

[Ham]

... now categorised as bad language and not spam.

That for saying "IBM"?

[Genosse Brymbo]

That for saying "IBM"?

Sorry, it was my own in-joke.  I have a subfolder of my Outlook inbox at work, called "Bad Language", where I move messages which offend me for grammar/spelling/vocabulary reasons.  A recent addition was sent by our Corporate Vice President of Information Security, or somesuch.  He requested that we "reframe from using weak passwords".

The spam contained a vocabulary offence - "reach out" instead of "contact".  This and "a bunch of" for "several" are the most common crimes I encounter, working for a U.S. employer.

[ian]

There's a sign in the mothership boys' loo that reads 'please reframe from putting paper towels down the toilet.' Amuses me every time.

[Ham]

That for saying "IBM"?

Sorry, it was my own in-joke.  I have a subfolder of my Outlook inbox at work, called "Bad Language", where I move messages which offend me for grammar/spelling/vocabulary reasons.  A recent addition was sent by our Corporate Vice President of Information Security, or somesuch.  He requested that we "reframe from using weak passwords".

The spam contained a vocabulary offence - "reach out" instead of "contact".  This and "a bunch of" for "several" are the most common crimes I encounter, working for a U.S. employer.

Ah yes, my comment was an in-joke too, I work for a certain US employer.

[Paul]

This is mildly bizarre, it was sent in to our company's support mail address.

Dear Sir/Madam, support We are a professional supplier of drawstring sports bags. This is a drawstring sports bag we do, it's a wonderful item for your reselling, packaging, giveaways, company events. Item: drawstring sports bag Material: 420D polyester Size: 32 x 45 cm MOQ: 1,000 pcs. We can also produce many other types of bags according to your requirements. Should you have any inquiry, please let us know. Steven Please send unsubscribe if you're not interested, thanks! It's impossible for us! "I know. I'll protect my identity." As I spoke, I turned and looked at the door and said, "Runzhi is afraid to wait. Let's go down quickly." In an instant, a large number of black demagogues, like opening the gate, gurgling out! "I really want to help you." I'm being honest. At first glance, the doctor naturally looked at Gu Huairen, the boss, and rushed to him and said, "the patient is all right, very." It's weird. After we had our craniotomy, we found that the focus had been strangely hemostatic? " 2019/5/26 5:19:32

Ah - it's a taster, or teaser, to encourage you to buy a drawstring sports bag with the promise of more to come. A sort of amusette bouche, if you will.

[hatler]

Wahey !!  Part 2.

I was taken to Huaizhi traditional Chinese Medicine Hospital that night. And the sun is one of them at the moment. At that moment, I despised this woman even more. Gu Huairen sat down the first time, his eyes caught a glimpse of Runzhi. "Why don't you go to Huitong County? There's a chicken farm, chicken farmers! There's two or three thousand dollars in January, too! " Sun ErNiang sent me to say.

Do I detect hints of Hemingway in there ?

[hatler]

Part 3.

So I called him directly, and when he answered the phone, he was very excited. "Yes. That's her. After my father told me the birthday of my real daughter, I didn't even go to the hospital. I knew it was Runzhi. Because at that time, Runzhi's father Ji Songnian was my subordinate, or that kind of humble subordinate. However, he is more handsome and likes to flirt with each other. After getting pregnant with Runzhi's mother du Lingling, she did not have the ability to deal with the problem, "he said. Morally, though, he shouldn't have made such a mistake with Jasmine. "Miss Ji is here." Aunt Gui Fang's voice came.

[Mr Larrington]

If you buy five or more drawstring sports bags you get the film rights

[Paul]

Shall we compose a couple of paragraphs to send back? We should run them through an online translator to get the full effect.

[hatler]

Part 4.

He thought so in his heart, but he could not say it in his mouth Acupuncture seems to be easy, after all, this is not any physical work, unlike the construction site to move bricks, the fact is also the same, but acupuncture is also divided into tens of millions of ways, some mysterious acupuncture is needed physical support, Qin and Han use of hundred Ling acupuncture is one of them Of course, he did not say what should be said or not Buzzing.

[De Sisti]

I had a phone call from 0808 189 0349, stating that they were from 'Sky Helpdesk', addressing
me as Keiron. I told them that I didn't have Sky and that they were conmen. I also invited them
to fxxx off before hanging up.

[Jaded]

"Hello!

I'm a programmer who cracked your email account and device about half year ago.
You entered a password on one of the insecure site you visited, and I catched it.

Of course you can will change your password, or already made it.
But it doesn't matter, my rat software update it every time."

Crikey, I'd better send him some bitcoins!

[robgul]

"Hello!

I'm a programmer who cracked your email account and device about half year ago.
You entered a password on one of the insecure site you visited, and I catched it.

Of course you can will change your password, or already made it.
But it doesn't matter, my rat software update it every time."

Crikey, I'd better send him some bitcoins!

... having about 20 prefix email names on a couple of my domains I get about 6 of that message every day to various addresses . . . . I'm beginning to worry that I'll run out of bitcoins 

Rob

[Jaded]

Had a good one the other day, a phone call.

“Hello, is that Mr Jaded?”
Yes
“Hello, I’m Pete, calling from.....”
silence
“dammit, I can never get these names right!”
click brrr

[Jaded]

I seen in dream to meet you...

Hey,my boy. i was seen you From Insta last few days and so i waunt to some meet you.
My Name Emily
I do some page With my personal photo.
I waiting you.
Ma nick : Powers791.

[Basil]

By text.

Argoscard here, we are closing accounts that is yet to migrate onto the new platform. Update your account to keep it active. http://Upgrade Myargoscarduk

(I've monged the web link for your safety)

Obv, I don't have an Argos card. Whatever that is.