Yet Another Cycling Forum

Off Topic => The Pub => Topic started by: LEE on December 06, 2013, 03:18:53 pm

Title: First-World Problems.
Post by: LEE on December 06, 2013, 03:18:53 pm
I'm out of Lavazza ground coffee and forced to drink instant all afternoon.


Note.  In case you were wondering this is a place to get sympathy for those hardships that only really affect people in affluent "First World" countries.

For example, it could be that John Lewis were sold out of Tagines and you were forced to serve your dinner guests from a normal casserole dish (Oh..the humanity).

Any starving Sub-Saharan Africans, or flooded from your homes Asians should start their own thread, this is for serious stuff.

(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Clare on December 06, 2013, 03:31:15 pm
You are not 'forced' to drink instant, you have chosen to. Quit whinging, get on your bike and go and get some coffee.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: LEE on December 06, 2013, 03:34:26 pm
But it's cold out and the car takes ages to heat up and the shop is a mile away.

That's how to score a Hat-Trick of First World problems.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on December 06, 2013, 03:35:20 pm
Surely you are waiting a delivery from your organic veg box supplier too?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on December 06, 2013, 03:40:41 pm
I think we may be running out of dishwasher tablets.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: darkpoint on December 06, 2013, 03:41:33 pm
Earlier in the year I had a head cold, so I was making hot toddies to aid my recovery.
Only I had run out of blended whisky and had to choose which of the 10 different malts I had in the cupboard I should use instead…
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on December 06, 2013, 03:42:29 pm
But it's cold out and the car takes ages to heat up and the shop is a mile away.

That's how to score a Hat-Trick of First World problems.

Damn, you are good at this! ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on December 06, 2013, 03:45:03 pm
But it's cold out and the car takes ages to heat up and the shop is a mile away.

Go to Tescos instead; they have free parking.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Valiant on December 06, 2013, 04:23:33 pm
The heating is cranked up full, but I'm still cold. I don't want to put on a jumper cos I'm more comfy in tshirts.

Does this count?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pippa on December 06, 2013, 04:27:13 pm
I had ouchy injections in my feet the other day. I couldn't walk properly for a couple of days. This is to stop my feet hurting when I ski.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on December 06, 2013, 04:32:10 pm
I'm having to fly Easyjet rather than BA to get home tonight.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: LEE on December 06, 2013, 05:07:50 pm
I think we may be running out of dishwasher tablets.

Perfect. Is Geldof aware? I sense a Benefit Concert in the making.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on December 06, 2013, 06:13:10 pm

I think we may be running out of dishwasher tablets.

Perfect. Is Geldof aware? I sense a Benefit Concert in the making.

Can we call it Rinse-aid? Someone call Bono.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on December 06, 2013, 07:50:47 pm
I think we may be running out of dishwasher tablets.

That nearly happened to me once. I sent the maid to Waitrose in the Bentley as soon as the chauffeur had finished servicing my wife.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on December 06, 2013, 08:03:24 pm
Amber alert: Gin state parlous.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rogerzilla on December 06, 2013, 08:05:39 pm
Sainsbury's had no normal lettuce and I had to buy iceberg.  Call Michael Buerk, I'll be on the news at 9.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on December 06, 2013, 08:42:10 pm
Roger sinks four hours after eating iceberg
But the kids played on
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on December 08, 2013, 04:48:13 pm
NATS
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: bikenrrd on December 08, 2013, 06:23:04 pm
The locally produced Genever I bought in Ghent last year is almost finished, I can't find it on the internet and I'm not scheduled to go to Belgium until next Spring!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rogerzilla on December 08, 2013, 06:55:32 pm
There were only 10 frazzles in my bag of frazzles.  Ersatz Sainsbury's frazzles, that is.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on December 08, 2013, 06:57:37 pm
There's a street light out about 200m from my house.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: contango on December 09, 2013, 08:54:38 am

My stock of Honduras La Fortuna Cup of Excellence coffee I enjoyed so much is now depleted. I can't buy any more because it was only one year that produced a spectacular crop and it's all used up now. Woe...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: CAMRAMan on December 09, 2013, 09:09:30 am
The ring pull bit on my can of tuna came off with the lid only partially opened. I had to use my electric can opener to get at the contents.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on December 09, 2013, 09:41:50 am
I have discovered that my bar of Kingdom rhubarb flavoured chocolate has been snaffled.   :'(

Worse, the organic semi-skimmed milk has been consumed so I had to soak my organic porridge oats and organic sultanas in council pop!   :hand:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tim Hall on December 09, 2013, 11:41:19 am
A ripping error meant I had 24 instances of "Dangerous" by Canvey Island's finest exponents of Rhythm and Blues on my Sansa Clip, instead of all of volume 2 of "25 years of Doctor Feelgood".

I'll get over it though.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on December 09, 2013, 11:55:25 am
The 3G speed available on my iPad at the office seems to have slowed down to a trickle and I can no longer stream Radio Four.  I might have to resort to FM.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Riggers on December 09, 2013, 12:02:25 pm
I've got to cycle to our local pet shop at lunchtime to buy a replacement tropical fish tank fluorescent light. I hope it's just the light that's gorn!!  >:(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on December 09, 2013, 01:02:48 pm
The crisps provided with the lunch on this training course are soggy.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Julian on December 09, 2013, 01:49:02 pm
The grape on my fruit kebab stick was wrinkly and soggy and tasted like sulphur at lunchtime today.

My heart is actually crying for some of you though.  My grape related problems are as nothing compared to yours.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: geraldc on December 09, 2013, 02:00:05 pm
The McDonalds closest to my office has closed. I will have to walk another couple of minutes to reach the next nearest.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on December 09, 2013, 02:56:29 pm
The paper shop nearest to work didn't have a Guardian.  I had to read Private Eye over my lunch.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on December 09, 2013, 03:06:01 pm
This thread is moving me to the point of tears.  I cannot imagine how some of you brave, brave people are coping.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: robgul on December 09, 2013, 03:17:24 pm
Years ago a friend of mine (working in publishing) lost his fairly well paid job ... went home and told his wife .. her first comment "What about he children's school fees?"

Priceless  (but no MasterCard!)

Rob
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on December 09, 2013, 03:24:09 pm
This thread is moving me to the point of tears.  I cannot imagine how some of you brave, brave people are coping.

Oh, it got worse.  I couldn't find any falafels or feta, so I had to substitute halloumi in my salad.  Can you imagine? :o
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on December 09, 2013, 03:30:49 pm
I have half a tub of Waitrose's finest guacamole to finish off. But I'm all out of tortilla chips.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on December 09, 2013, 03:32:37 pm
I wondered what had happened to my halloumi.   

I've got to leave the warm of my office and go downstairs to make coffee. 
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: fboab on December 09, 2013, 04:04:09 pm
I'm being taken to court for non payment of council tax.

(I haven't really got this thread, have I?)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: LEE on December 09, 2013, 04:26:55 pm
The McDonalds closest to my office has closed.

Consider moving this to "The Good News Thread"
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: madcow on December 09, 2013, 04:27:41 pm
Which car do I use for customer visits tomorrow?
The gas guzzling 4WD with integrated Bluetooth, built in sat-nav and cruise control or the economical but comical hatchback, with easy to steal Tom-Tom and no legal way of using my mobile phone?

PS How will I cope without DAB radio on my journey?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on December 09, 2013, 04:30:37 pm
I'm being taken to court for non payment of council tax.

(I haven't really got this thread, have I?)

I helped a lady win such a case recently.   
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on December 09, 2013, 04:46:06 pm
I'm being taken to court for non payment of council tax.

(I haven't really got this thread, have I?)

Is East Anglia in the First World? ;D

And sympathy with the bad news, btw.  I've just won a battle with Sutton over the council tax.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on December 09, 2013, 09:26:35 pm
I'm being taken to court for non payment of council tax.

(I haven't really got this thread, have I?)

I once found myself in court because of my perfectly legal political campaigning. Which world does that fit into?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on December 10, 2013, 08:11:14 am
The mirror in my hotel bathroom isn't heated. How am I supposed to shave?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on December 10, 2013, 08:25:51 am
I'm feeling unwell, my tablet needs a charge and the charger and lead are out of reach of my bed.   :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wascally Weasel on December 10, 2013, 08:36:52 am
There were no hot sausage baps for sale in Sainsbury's this morning.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: urban_biker on December 10, 2013, 10:11:56 am
My kids and wife are ill (minor chest infection), I have a mouth ulcer, and my mouth is now even more sore thanks to the attentions of the dental hygienist.

Oh - and I have to go an walk the dog in a minute and I'm feeling lazy.


How many points is that?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: nicknack on December 10, 2013, 10:18:12 am
The booze fridge is full so I've had to start stashing stuff in the garage. That means I have to go OUTSIDE to get it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on December 10, 2013, 10:32:20 am
Despite being in a sealed bag in the freezer, I am beginning to suspect that my Konga Washed Yirgacheffe beans are past their prime. 

I'd still rather make coffee from an old roast than have to go to the in-house Costa concession but I'm perilously low on unbleached filter papers, so this might actually have to happen.

Oh, the crushing indignity  :-[
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on December 10, 2013, 10:37:52 am
My delivery of Spiced Abyss hot chocolate arrived, but 2 of the containers had popped in transit.

I now smell of chocolate, vanilla, cardomon & chilli and have brown stains all over me.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Efrogwr on December 10, 2013, 12:17:17 pm
My sister has run out of suet for making Christmas grub and I've got to find a quick way of sending some to Italy.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: tiermat on December 10, 2013, 12:31:43 pm
My sister has run out of suet for making Christmas grub and I've got to find a quick way of sending some to Italy.

Tell he to go out and grate a cow!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Efrogwr on December 10, 2013, 12:54:44 pm
My sister has run out of suet for making Christmas grub and I've got to find a quick way of sending some to Italy.

Tell he to go out and grate a cow!

There aren't any where she lives!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mattc on December 10, 2013, 06:15:13 pm
I am really quite cross about this. The Times2 Crossword:
"Pleasantly low temperature" (6)

Further Hint:
(click to show/hide)

Answer:
(click to show/hide)

What?!? Who has ever heard of this word. I feel a letter to the Editor coming on ...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: SteveC on December 10, 2013, 06:37:57 pm
I am really quite cross about this. The Times2 Crossword:
"Pleasantly low temperature" (6)
What?!? Who has ever heard of this word. I feel a letter to the Editor coming on ...
I've heard of it. I've even used it. Mind, I've never been sure whether it was 'real' or not.
Quote from: www.oxforddictionaries.com
coolth
Pronunciation: /kuːlθ/
noun
[mass noun]
1pleasantly low temperature:
the coolth of the evening
2 informal the quality of being fashionable:
the pinnacle of 1960s coolth
Origin:

mid 16th century (but rare before the 20th century): from cool + -th2
http://www.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/english/coolth (http://www.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/english/coolth)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on December 10, 2013, 07:10:38 pm
I have heard, and used, the word "coolth" but only expected it to exist in the same lexicon as "molish".
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: CAMRAMan on December 10, 2013, 11:09:00 pm
My smartphone, that sits about 3 feet away, tells me I have mail. Should I a) switch off the phone or b) check my inbox. What a dilemma. Oh, and my XL onesies that arrived today are nothing but XL and I have to return them.

Slightly OT, I just watched Dubya get booed, so all is not totally unwell.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: contango on December 11, 2013, 02:14:53 pm
My delivery of Spiced Abyss hot chocolate arrived, but 2 of the containers had popped in transit.

I now smell of chocolate, vanilla, cardomon & chilli and have brown stains all over me.

... and that, Your Honour, concludes the case for the defence ...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Auntie Helen on December 11, 2013, 02:41:04 pm
I have run out of caramelised red onion chutney.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andyoxon on December 11, 2013, 02:41:29 pm
I have Danish Blue in the fridge, but far prefer Stilton or St Agur; so I'll just have to leave off the port for a bit.   :-\ 

Who's the current 'leader'   ;)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rafletcher on December 11, 2013, 03:05:29 pm
I am really quite cross about this. The Times2 Crossword:
"Pleasantly low temperature" (6)

Further Hint:
(click to show/hide)

Answer:
(click to show/hide)

What?!? Who has ever heard of this word. I feel a letter to the Editor coming on ...

mid 16th century (but rare before the 20th century):  ::-)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: closetleftie on December 11, 2013, 03:15:52 pm
The booze fridge is full so I've had to start stashing stuff in the garage. That means I have to go OUTSIDE to get it.

Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner. Oh, the humanity!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Thor on December 13, 2013, 10:59:25 am
Mrs Thor bought so much wine in Sainsburys recent 25% off offer that I haven't room to stash it all in the cellar*

* the cupboard under the stairs
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on December 13, 2013, 07:08:44 pm
I've got a BOGOF:

1. Schweppes and Sainsbury's - thanks to your respectively very similar livery and inattention, I am in possession of 3 bottles of slim line tonic. I think I'd rather drink the devil's piss.

2. Stupid fridge. I was going to make a great fishy dinner for tea, but you appear to have par-frozen the fish and made ice-cream out of the cream for the sauce.
Better sort yourself out cos if I have to go fridge freezer shopping in the new year it'll be the frying pan of spang for you.

^The above post may contain traces of rant.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on December 13, 2013, 07:38:06 pm
Bugger.  No cheap chicken breast in the butchers this evening so I've had to use organic chicken breast forthe rogan josh.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 13, 2013, 07:38:31 pm
I am really quite cross about this. The Times2 Crossword:
"Pleasantly low temperature" (6)

Further Hint:
(click to show/hide)

Answer:
(click to show/hide)

What?!? Who has ever heard of this word. I feel a letter to the Editor coming on ...

We used it frequently in uk.rec.sheds...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on December 13, 2013, 07:40:36 pm
Bugger.  No cheap chicken breast in the butchers this evening so I've had to use organic chicken breast forthe rogan josh.
Surely that makes it rogan murgh.

Someone is using food words wrongly on the internet - First World Problem!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on December 13, 2013, 07:57:24 pm
No, it was not buttered chicken.   
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Clare on December 13, 2013, 08:04:10 pm
I have a cold and somebody is working late.

How the hell am I supposed to get my glass recharged with the medicinal port?

Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 13, 2013, 08:04:38 pm
Isn't rogan josh a 'red meat' dish?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rogerzilla on December 13, 2013, 08:12:16 pm
Some of the LEDs on the Christmas lights have died.  Chinese shite again.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on December 13, 2013, 08:13:20 pm
Isn't rogan josh a 'red meat' dish?

Oh how first world ...   ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on December 14, 2013, 01:31:00 pm
Have to travel to South Africa in the New Year to visit a client. Requested BA Premium Economy. Unfortunately that violated the client's (who's picking up the tab) travel policy so I have to go Virgin Upper Class instead.

Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: kombokim on December 14, 2013, 03:50:56 pm
Run out of instant coffee! Looks like I'll have to brew some proper coffee. Oh what to do, Columbian or Kenyan?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: TimC on December 14, 2013, 03:54:14 pm
Have to travel to South Africa in the New Year to visit a client. Requested BA Premium Economy. Unfortunately that violated the client's (who's picking up the tab) travel policy so I have to go Virgin Upper Class instead.



Could be me flying you!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on December 14, 2013, 04:25:17 pm
I now have more logs and kindling than I have room for in the store.
Oh the problems!  We're going to have to have several unnecessary fires.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on December 15, 2013, 09:05:37 am
Have to travel to South Africa in the New Year to visit a client. Requested BA Premium Economy. Unfortunately that violated the client's (who's picking up the tab) travel policy so I have to go Virgin Upper Class instead.



Could be me flying you!

Out on the 12th back on the 17th? If it is you can we aerobatics like last time ;)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: TimC on December 15, 2013, 12:54:49 pm
Sadly, no - I'm out on 23rd. Aerobatics? Hmmm.... ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on December 15, 2013, 01:06:49 pm
I mustn't have shaken the juice carton very well this week because the final pour had a lot of bits in.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: fboab on December 15, 2013, 07:51:14 pm
I've lost my sugar thermometer. Some of my fudge is grainier than I prefer.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: CAMRAMan on December 15, 2013, 08:15:51 pm
I went to grind some pepper on my lunch today and the grinder's batteries were flat. I had to, sorry - it hurts to say this, put ready ground, WHITE pepper on instead.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on December 15, 2013, 08:46:25 pm
Do you need counselling?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tim Hall on December 15, 2013, 10:00:06 pm
I went for a bite to eat with my sister-from-Australia this evening.  The first two pubs we tried didn't serve food in the evening.   Fortunately the town is rammed with restaurants so it wasn't as bad as it could have been. And I'd had a big lunch.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: CAMRAMan on December 15, 2013, 10:23:00 pm
Do you need counselling?
I think so, as the sea salt has run out as well...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on December 15, 2013, 10:24:21 pm
OMG, it's a goddam disaster area! :o
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: CAMRAMan on December 15, 2013, 10:33:05 pm
I've been playing Gloria Gaynor all day since.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: tiermat on December 16, 2013, 09:33:25 am
Have to travel to South Africa in the New Year to visit a client. Requested BA Premium Economy. Unfortunately that violated the client's (who's picking up the tab) travel policy so I have to go Virgin Upper Class instead.

Sounds a bit like our travel policy.  If the flight is over X hours then the minimum class is Business.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Efrogwr on December 19, 2013, 11:52:55 pm
The anodising on my garlic press dissolved in the dishwasher, and now the garlic goes black.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on December 20, 2013, 09:05:28 am
While removing my poached egg from the pan, I split the yolk and it all ran out into the water.

FFS.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on December 20, 2013, 09:06:31 am
Oh citoyen, the relentless vicissitudes that you must suffer.

For my part, the spring clip has broken from the back of my MP3 player and I can no longer attach it to my clothing, reducing its convenience considerably.

The frustration is overwhelming.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on December 20, 2013, 09:14:09 am
How can anyone endure?  :o
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Efrogwr on December 20, 2013, 09:54:49 am
How can anyone endure?  :o

It's a hard life, but, hey, KBO.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Gus on December 20, 2013, 11:28:57 am
No chili-lime crisps, 11 other types but not what I want, I might have to starve  :'(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Biggsy on December 20, 2013, 02:09:41 pm
Toilet paper layers separating for the whole roll.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rafletcher on December 20, 2013, 02:48:09 pm
Toilet paper layers separating for the whole roll.

I hate that - so we have quilted.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on December 20, 2013, 02:50:39 pm
Quilted paper is a First-World problem all of its own. Like TV Dinner Trays.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on December 20, 2013, 05:12:35 pm
Toilet paper layers separating for the whole roll.

They're out of sync.  Flip the outer layer round the roll and they should meet up again.

#firstworldsolutions
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Biggsy on December 20, 2013, 05:48:20 pm
They're out of sync.  Flip the outer layer round the roll and they should meet up again.

Doesn't work for a bad case.

As if any case of toilet roll asynchronousity is bad compared to third world problems of not even having decent toilets, let alone luxury toiler paper.  ::-)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: peliroja on December 20, 2013, 06:23:05 pm
My preferred dog jumper manufacturer isn't making the one with zips in over Christmas.  :-\
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rogerzilla on December 21, 2013, 10:23:58 am
The champagne was warm and flat at last night's do.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: epa611 on December 21, 2013, 12:23:54 pm
My masticating juicer is on the Fritz. Having to get the maid to squeeze my oranges by hand using the Alessi :-)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ewan Houzami on December 22, 2013, 01:39:05 pm
For some reason, neither of my local supermarkets stock Fettucine any longer, leaving me in the unenviable position of having to decide whether to buy Linguine or Tagliatelle for my Ragú.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Efrogwr on December 22, 2013, 03:39:28 pm
For some reason, neither of my local supermarkets stock Fettucine any longer, leaving me in the unenviable position of having to decide whether to buy Linguine or Tagliatelle for my Ragú.

I can't find Orecchiette anywhere.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Oaky on December 22, 2013, 10:20:26 pm
I've only gone and run out of bloody gin.

bah!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 22, 2013, 10:28:43 pm
Sainsbury's could not supply the pork loin joint I had wanted to serve for dinner on 25 December.

We will have to have either:

The pork crackling joint or
the turkey leg joint or
the chicken or
the roast beef.

Bah!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Gus on December 22, 2013, 10:44:37 pm
I've only gone and run out of bloody gin.

bah!

that's a universal and not just first world problem  :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Oaky on December 22, 2013, 11:07:05 pm
I've only gone and run out of bloody gin.

bah!

that's a universal and not just first world problem  :(

But I had to crack open the Burgundy I was saving for Wednesday!

Does nobody understand the trauma!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Gus on December 22, 2013, 11:21:07 pm
I've only gone and run out of bloody gin.

bah!

that's a universal and not just first world problem  :(

But I had to crack open the Burgundy I was saving for Wednesday!

Does nobody understand the trauma!

You forgot to mention that;  It's a disaster
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Oaky on December 22, 2013, 11:26:13 pm
I've only gone and run out of bloody gin.

bah!

that's a universal and not just first world problem  :(

But I had to crack open the Burgundy I was saving for Wednesday!

Does nobody understand the trauma!

You forgot to mention that;  It's a disaster

It was remiss of me to mention it, I just assumed that it would be understood.

Now that's also gone, and I find myself drawn towards to laid-down port. The only thing stopping me is that I'd have to move the hoover and about a hundredweight of mrs_o's old, retired (aka "worn once") shoes to get to it.

Time to check the wine rack again...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mcshroom on December 23, 2013, 09:43:24 am
I'm having to wait before I can cook breakfast as all the crockery is in the dishwasher :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on December 23, 2013, 09:46:53 am
I've only gone and run out of bloody gin.

bah!

I'm down to my last 60 bottles. And those are in boxes and I have no idea which one contains my favourite bottles of cream gin. The suffering, it's inhuman.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Oaky on December 23, 2013, 11:29:58 am
The real tragedy last night was that I still had plenty of tonic left.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mattc on December 23, 2013, 03:07:03 pm
https://yacf.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=78869.0
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on December 23, 2013, 05:11:32 pm
I've only gone and run out of bloody gin.

bah!

I'm down to my last 60 bottles. And those are in boxes and I have no idea which one contains my favourite bottles of cream gin. The suffering, it's inhuman.

*Looks for a pretence to visit Ian's house and taste all his gin....*
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: billplumtree on December 24, 2013, 10:35:17 am
*Looks for a pretence to visit Ian's house and taste all his gin....*

Aren't you a world authority on bear control, Mrs P?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on December 24, 2013, 01:15:49 pm
I want to see Blue Is The Warmest Colour but don't want everyone to think I'm only interested in the lesbian sex scenes.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 24, 2013, 01:29:08 pm
Much of Britain was lashed by storms last night.
My Broadband kept dropping; I really suffered.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Chris S on December 24, 2013, 01:42:18 pm
Local supermarkets only seem to stock Cadbury's Hot Chocolate pods for the Tassimo, not the yummier Suchard's variety.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on December 24, 2013, 01:51:20 pm
*Looks for a pretence to visit Ian's house and taste all his gin....*

Aren't you a world authority on bear control, Mrs P?

I am too.  Honestly ...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Biggsy on December 24, 2013, 01:51:52 pm
Being disappointed that my PCIe solid state drive only reads at 740 MB/s in my computer instead of its maximum 1500 MB/s - despite it already being more than four times faster than an average hard drive.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on December 25, 2013, 12:14:39 am
I can't get the album art to show up when I'm ripping to FLAC.  The emotional turmoil is almost too much to bear.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on December 25, 2013, 12:43:54 am
Waitrose! Why have you stopped stocking Macleans' toothpaste?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on December 25, 2013, 01:04:59 am
*Looks for a pretence to visit Ian's house and taste all his gin....*

Aren't you a world authority on bear control, Mrs P?

Err....yes, I absolutely am!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on December 25, 2013, 01:26:29 am
Traditionaly, Father C. brings me a decent bottle of single malt in my stocking.  Problem is, I really fancy a night cap and pressies aren't for several hours yet.  So, (imagine the horror) I'm having a Famous Grouse and coke.
Even worse, I'm enjoying it.
I definately need counciling.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: TimC on December 25, 2013, 07:22:37 am
Does your council provide single malts?!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on December 25, 2013, 09:40:43 am
Weather causes some flight delays.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on December 25, 2013, 09:57:56 am
My mother has lost the Christmas pudding!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rogerzilla on December 25, 2013, 10:01:03 am
The bloody outlaws have no coffee making apparatus.  Not even a cafetiere.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on December 25, 2013, 10:10:30 am
My mother has lost the Christmas pudding!

Panic over my wife has found it. I was just about to drive home and get one!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruth on December 25, 2013, 12:39:41 pm
We have just used the last of the fresh coffee, and will be restricted to instant after we have finished this pot.

Also we have no fresh milk and are using UHT.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 25, 2013, 12:59:11 pm
We have just used the last of the fresh coffee, and will be restricted to instant after we have finished this pot.

Also we have no fresh milk and are using UHT.

Too late now but why don't you keep some milk in the freezer? My freezer is full of 'emergency milk'. It's much nicer than stringy UHT.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruth on December 25, 2013, 01:27:48 pm
We have just used the last of the fresh coffee, and will be restricted to instant after we have finished this pot.

Also we have no fresh milk and are using UHT.

Too late now but why don't you keep some milk in the freezer? My freezer is full of 'emergency milk'. It's much nicer than stringy UHT.

You mean, be organised and plan stuff?

That would be silly.

Also why we are not having potatoes with our dinner today  ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on December 25, 2013, 01:31:46 pm
Nahh, UHT milk is way nicer.  </philistine>


(I think I was subjected to too much powdered milk at a formative age.)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: barakta on December 25, 2013, 01:33:34 pm
Kim calls UHT "plastic milk" and we retain a stash for her drinkings.  I never used it even when I could digest the lactose in it *shudder* 'orrible stuff.

Can't you make coffee in a pan and use a tea strainer when pouring into mugs, that's how my gran taught me to make freshly ground coffee...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruth on December 25, 2013, 01:36:32 pm
Kim calls UHT "plastic milk" and we retain a stash for her drinkings.  I never used it even when I could digest the lactose in it *shudder* 'orrible stuff.

Can't you make coffee in a pan and use a tea strainer when pouring into mugs, that's how my gran taught me to make freshly ground coffee...

That sounds like Cowboy Coffee.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: barakta on December 25, 2013, 01:41:22 pm
My Gran claimed it is how the French make coffee but I can't ask her now cos she has Alzheimers.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 25, 2013, 03:16:01 pm
Kim calls UHT "plastic milk" and we retain a stash for her drinkings.  I never used it even when I could digest the lactose in it *shudder* 'orrible stuff.

Can't you make coffee in a pan and use a tea strainer when pouring into mugs, that's how my gran taught me to make freshly ground coffee...

Lacto-free UHT is just as stringy as any other UHT milk whereas the chilled variety is quite palatable. I don't understand how chilled Lacto-free can have a shelf life of a month. Stuff in last week's Sainsbury's delivery had a 21 January use by date.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 25, 2013, 03:17:34 pm
Partner has cut up the parsnip into pieces which are the wrong shape for roasting.

I'll have to microwave them.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: barakta on December 25, 2013, 04:23:52 pm
I know, I have noticed the long life of lactofree, it also survives being "kept" out of a fridge for longer which is how I get away with hoiking my own supplies of it around.  I am surprised by how palatable it is, only a handful of people complain about it compared to regular milk. 

The long life lactofree is minging and I try not to drink it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tewdric on December 25, 2013, 05:44:45 pm
The bloody outlaws have no coffee making apparatus.  Not even a cafetiere.

In the same bateau here.  There's an auto type filter thing but it still doesn't make coffee.  I'm consigned to liquid, brown, coffee-type until we get back to some Happy Donkey love.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rogerzilla on December 25, 2013, 05:51:29 pm
Tonight's TV preferences from the old folk (who only have one TV) is the worst imaginable; the abominable bread-and-circuses Strictly, you-bloody-slaaaaag EastEnders etc.

I may go to bed early.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: barakta on December 25, 2013, 06:49:01 pm
*shudder* at enforced telly of crapness. 
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruth on December 25, 2013, 06:50:08 pm
We are going to play Lord of the Rings Trivial Pursuit, but neither of us can be arsed to set the board up.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: geraldc on December 25, 2013, 07:31:06 pm
I'm keeping myself amused by shelling nuts, but can't for the life of me shell a Brazil nut so it comes out intact. Walnuts are also posing a problem.

There is also a large amount nut shrapnel and nut detritus on my chest, and I can't get up without spilling it on the sofa.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: dasmoth on December 25, 2013, 07:43:04 pm
Water feed level sensor in my espresso machine is kaput  :'(.

I knew we should have had the kitchen re-done so we could have a plumbed-in machine.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on December 26, 2013, 12:20:03 am
Traditionaly, Father C. brings me a decent bottle of single malt in my stocking.  Problem is, I really fancy a night cap and pressies aren't for several hours yet.  So, (imagine the horror) I'm having a Famous Grouse and coke.
Even worse, I'm enjoying it.
I definately need counciling.

Disaster averted.  Thank-you Santa.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Julian on December 26, 2013, 03:26:26 pm
I have a week off over Christmas and I'm ruining it by being ill in my own time.  :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on December 26, 2013, 03:27:58 pm
I have a week off over Christmas and I'm ruining it by being ill in my own time.  :(
Urgh!
That truly sucks.
GWS
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: SteveC on December 26, 2013, 04:04:09 pm
I have a week off over Christmas and I'm ruining it by being ill in my own time.  :(
This happens so often. The first 5 years MrsC and I were an item, she was ill over Christmas. It wasn't until we learned to deliberately slow down in the previous weeks (not accepting invitations to every event for instance) that we had a healthy break. And we're neither of us too bright this year!  :-\
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on December 26, 2013, 04:12:13 pm
BTDTGTTS, Julian. You have my sympathy. Get well soon.

I think for me it was the relief at finishing work. The build up to Christmas is my busiest time of the year. First day off, body says, "Right, that's it, I'm shutting down for a week..."
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rogerzilla on December 26, 2013, 04:13:43 pm
I used to get flu or a heavy cold most Christmases, then I discovered echinacea (works for some people, not for others).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Biggsy on December 26, 2013, 04:27:53 pm
Blocked echinacea tubes are quite unpleasant.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Julian on December 26, 2013, 04:50:08 pm
I thought echinacea was the Latin name for a hedgehog.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on December 26, 2013, 04:57:08 pm
I have a week off over Christmas and I'm ruining it by being ill in my own time.  :(

So am I. I finished teaching on Wednesday last week and on Thursday this low-level grot that has been rumbling around for about a month developed into a proper cold with the snots and a very sore throat. This didn't stop me from going to my brothers to eat a goose and lots of other luvverly things yesterday, but my voice was on teh point of giving out when we came home.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rr on December 26, 2013, 05:17:38 pm
I can't buy the half price Christmas cutlery in matalan's sale because we've nowhere to keep it until next year!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on December 26, 2013, 06:29:11 pm
I have a week off over Christmas and I'm ruining it by being ill in my own time.  :(

Sucks doesn't it? I spent Christmas day dispensing snot like broken water fountain. Today, I've combined the runny nose with a sore throat and now, in the latest turn, a tickly annoying cough that feels like spiders disco dancing in my throat. My wife is terrified that I have the flu (owing to the fact that when I did have the flu she didn't believe me, and she got told off by the hospital for not calling an ambulance, so yeah ladies, manflu is real), but this is just a stupid bog-standard cold. It's guaranteed to cure itself just in time for a far worse ailment to arrive: the inlaws at the weekend.

I fear this is stopping my full appreciation of my Christmas pressie gin bounty (another three bottles for the bar). Come on Bob, where's my charity concert and record?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on December 26, 2013, 07:26:54 pm
We have no oregano...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Oaky on December 26, 2013, 07:35:36 pm
We have no oregano...
Pencil shavings are the traditional stand-in, I believe
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rogerzilla on December 26, 2013, 08:42:17 pm
I have a week off over Christmas and I'm ruining it by being ill in my own time.  :(

Sucks doesn't it? I spent Christmas day dispensing snot like broken water fountain. Today, I've combined the runny nose with a sore throat and now, in the latest turn, a tickly annoying cough that feels like spiders disco dancing in my throat. My wife is terrified that I have the flu (owing to the fact that when I did have the flu she didn't believe me, and she got told off by the hospital for not calling an ambulance, so yeah ladies, manflu is real), but this is just a stupid bog-standard cold. It's guaranteed to cure itself just in time for a far worse ailment to arrive: the inlaws at the weekend.

I fear this is stopping my full appreciation of my Christmas pressie gin bounty (another three bottles for the bar). Come on Bob, where's my charity concert and record?
I can report that cheap white rum and coke goes down fine when you have a cold, and may hasten recovery (or at least you'll be so gratified that you somehow staggered back through 6 miles of chav-infested Swindon streets on autopilot and woke up in your own bed, you'll forget about the cold).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on December 26, 2013, 08:44:39 pm
I dare not feed Julian rum of any kind lest she become uncharacteristically violent.  But you will be relieved to hear that she is self-medicating with Hobgoblin...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on December 26, 2013, 08:45:26 pm
We have no oregano...

Bloody hell, Paul.  Are you OK?

Paul?

Paul?

Shit.  Does anyone live near by?

Paul.  Try your nearest food bank.  It's what they're there for.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mr magnolia on December 26, 2013, 08:53:30 pm
Basil advising on oregano? Is this a herb garden?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on December 26, 2013, 09:08:13 pm
To be honest, I've been worrying about this very scenario for some thyme.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on December 26, 2013, 09:15:08 pm
I was worried about it myself.  I expressed my opinion very gingerly.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: tiermat on December 26, 2013, 09:29:22 pm
Surely we can find someone to dispense some sage advice?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on December 26, 2013, 10:20:21 pm
I  mustard  misunderstood the problem here.    I have some Paul - hang on in there  mace   dill  I get there.   Hope I'm in  thyme.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on December 26, 2013, 10:25:31 pm
Bugger.  Can't find my cloves.   Paul, I'm cu...       Maybe not!    :D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on December 26, 2013, 10:54:15 pm
We have no oregano...

Bloody hell, Paul.  Are you OK?

Paul?

Paul?

Shit.  Does anyone live near by?

Paul.  Try your nearest food bank.  It's what they're there for.

It's OK, major am made an acceptable substitute :)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on December 26, 2013, 11:28:46 pm
Hope you don't get too emaceated.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tewdric on December 26, 2013, 11:36:30 pm

I thought echinacea was the Latin name for a hedgehog.

Nope, it's the cynical murder of scots audax organisers.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Gus on December 27, 2013, 12:43:07 pm
I'm out of sliced bread.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Zipperhead on December 27, 2013, 02:40:08 pm
This mornings pain au chocolat looked a little stale. I think that frenchie baker has been slacking, and just because he got up early on Christmas morning to bake, I think the lazy swine stayed in bed today and they had to sell yesterdays surplus.

To compound my misery I noticed that the foam on the inside of the earcups of my favourite electrostatic headphones has broken up and fallen out.

What is a person to do? Standards must be maintained.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: peliroja on December 27, 2013, 02:56:22 pm
My Aldi scone is too crumbly for my Marks & Spencer rasberry conserve.

I blame myself. I should have predicted this incompatibility.  :facepalm:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on December 27, 2013, 05:26:59 pm
http://pbs.twimg.com/media/BcfIEqQCAAAOjIM.jpg#twimg
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Valiant on December 28, 2013, 03:20:59 am
I only got one Xmas card this year :'(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 28, 2013, 03:04:25 pm
The beetroot crisps are staining the plaice.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rr on December 28, 2013, 04:08:26 pm
Mrs R feels sick because she ate too much at the all you can eat buffet.
We had to pay full price for micro too, she's only 10 but over 150cm all... £4 more !!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mr magnolia on December 28, 2013, 06:36:02 pm
My mother bought an electric carving knife for use on the turkey this year because last year she really got exhausted carving the thing. (Not exactly the same thing, I hope)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on December 28, 2013, 08:22:14 pm
The Christmas cake my mum has sent me away with is so big it'll do me till next Christmas.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 29, 2013, 06:22:09 pm
Sainsbury's don't seem to sell white caster sugar. Their 'Fair Trade Golden Caster Sugar' is too coarse and sticky for me to sprinkle on my berries.

The Israel Philharmonic Orchestra website is rubbish; I cannot see seat availability or ticket prices.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on December 29, 2013, 06:26:53 pm
Can you whizz the golden caster sugar in a food professor?

There is so much food in this flat I am struggling to fit it into the fridge and freezer.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 29, 2013, 06:31:39 pm
Can you whizz the golden caster sugar in a food professor?

There is so much food in this flat I am struggling to fit it into the fridge and freezer.

I haven't tried but it's sticky and whizzing it is unlikely to make it less so.
It would be fine for baking but its stickiness makes it difficult to sprinkle as sparingly as our post-Christmas diet intentions would like.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 29, 2013, 06:40:24 pm
I've been back to the Sainsbury's website. It appears they do have Silver Spoon Caster Sugar.
It's listed under 'Baking Ingredients' but not under 'Sugar' in the Tea, Coffee and Sugar' listing...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tewdric on December 29, 2013, 06:55:59 pm
I've run out of La Perruche and had to have my espresso with white sugar this morning.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruth on December 29, 2013, 10:41:50 pm
They stopped selling the matching cheese knife for my cutlery set.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: fboab on December 29, 2013, 10:53:46 pm
I've been back to the Sainsbury's website. It appears they do have Silver Spoon Caster Sugar.
It's listed under 'Baking Ingredients' but not under 'Sugar' in the Tea, Coffee and Sugar' listing...
Why on earth would you use caster sugar in tea or coffee? Tea requires white lumps and coffee needs demerara.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 29, 2013, 11:21:24 pm
I've been back to the Sainsbury's website. It appears they do have Silver Spoon Caster Sugar.
It's listed under 'Baking Ingredients' but not under 'Sugar' in the Tea, Coffee and Sugar' listing...
Why on earth would you use caster sugar in tea or coffee? Tea requires white lumps and coffee needs demerara.

If you put your sugar in a caster?  ;)  (That's a sugar shaker.)

The problem is the listing. The 'Food Cupboard' category has sublists like Breakfast Cereals, Tea, Coffee & Sugar, 'Herbs, Spices, Gravies & Stuffings', 'Cooking & Baking Essentials', 'Rice, Pasta & Noodles' etc.

Silly me thought that 'Tea, Coffee & Sugar' would include all the sugar they sold in the 'All sugar' sub sublist of Tea, Coffee & Sugar.
It didn't.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on December 30, 2013, 05:13:50 pm
Silly me thought that 'Tea, Coffee & Sugar' would include all the sugar they sold in the 'All sugar' sub sublist of Tea, Coffee & Sugar.
It didn't.

Organisation of products in supermarkets is the bane of my life. I spent hours trying to find desiccated coconut the other day. (Well, it felt like hours.)

You'd think this wouldn't be a problem with online shopping - I'm sure database technology is sufficiently advanced for products to be listed on multiple "virtual shelves".

How do the pickers who collect online orders manage? Are they expected to learn where every last one of their n million product lines is located in the shop, or do their little handheld devices tell them where to find stuff as they progress round, clogging up the aisles with those stupid enormous trollies? If the latter, why can't I get an app that does the same for me?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 30, 2013, 05:20:33 pm
The pickers find things because items have their (faulty logic) category 'pedigree'

I think the workaround is to search for everything you feel they ought to have but can't find in its 'obvious' place. This can mean scrolling through pages of lists because the 'logic' includes rather more than you might expect, if my experience with a search for 'apricot' is an example.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Biggsy on December 30, 2013, 05:20:53 pm
Yes, the pickers know where every single item is ...except the desiccated coconut.  I got directed to the fruit 'n' veg section when I asked for it in store.  The poor man thought I wanted a whole fresh coconut.  I never did find the desiccated.  I bought Bounty bars instead.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on December 30, 2013, 05:23:33 pm
Don't most home deliveries come from warehouses rather than actual shops these days?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on December 30, 2013, 05:24:40 pm
At least online you have the option of sticking 'caster sugar in the search box. No search box in the store!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 30, 2013, 05:28:05 pm
Desiccated coconut:
-> Cooking & Baking Essentials -> Christmas Homebaking: -> All Christmas Homebaking.

Hope you don't want desecratrated coconut next week...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on December 30, 2013, 05:33:42 pm
Don't most home deliveries come from warehouses rather than actual shops these days?

Only the ones that cost money. Warehouses cost money, and you need a lot to cover the country.

It is way more efficient to have the merchandise picked in a local store, and delivered from it. The thousands of product lines are already being managed by the in-store staff, for stock turn etc. so no duplication of effort or storage space.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: CAMRAMan on December 30, 2013, 05:39:21 pm
How do the pickers who collect online orders manage? Are they expected to learn where every last one of their n million product lines is located in the shop, or do their little handheld devices tell them where to find stuff as they progress round, clogging up the aisles with those stupid enormous trollies? If the latter, why can't I get an app that does the same for me?
They are shown what item to pick next, in which aisle it is, and on which shelf in that given location. The item's barcode is then scanned and that confirms (or not) that it's the right thing. The computer then tells the picker in which tote (box) to place it. Pretty tedious work, but better than doing the actual delivering. DAHIKT.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Biggsy on December 30, 2013, 05:43:01 pm
It gets more efficient to use warehouses as home delivery gets more popular.  Tesco in my area is planning to switch to a warehouse system, if I heard correctly.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on December 30, 2013, 05:51:58 pm
They are shown what item to pick next, in which aisle it is, and on which shelf in that given location.

I want this as an iPhone app. Preferably one that will tell me where to find any item on my shopping list in any of the various local stores I use.

I really don't think that is asking too much.

;)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on December 30, 2013, 05:53:49 pm
In seven minutes, delivery of my new PC will be late!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Biggsy on December 30, 2013, 05:59:15 pm
I want this as an iPhone app. Preferably one that will tell me where to find any item on my shopping list in any of the various local stores I use.

I really don't think that is asking too much.

;)

I was asking for that before smartphones were invented.  And yet it's still not here (not for my BlackBerry anyway).  A first world problem indeed.  Such an abundance of goods that we can't wade through them.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mattc on December 30, 2013, 06:04:45 pm
It gets more efficient to use warehouses as home delivery gets more popular.  Tesco in my area is planning to switch to a warehouse system, if I heard correctly.
We live nearer to the Tesco depot than to our nearest store. But I bet they won't give us a delivery discount, oh no!  >:(  #fwp
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on December 30, 2013, 06:09:16 pm
They are shown what item to pick next, in which aisle it is, and on which shelf in that given location.

I want this as an iPhone app. Preferably one that will tell me where to find any item on my shopping list in any of the various local stores I use.

I really don't think that is asking too much.

;)

Just download it then  ;)

(http://www.alfiecat.co.uk/yetacf/IMG_4974.PNG)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on December 30, 2013, 07:16:15 pm
... If the latter, why can't I get an app that does the same for me?


I used to have an app (for Sainsburys or Tesco, can't remember which) that did just that. Unfortunately it didn't work in my, then, local store as tehre was no reception....

Pretty sure that it was the relevant chain's own app if that helps
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: CAMRAMan on December 31, 2013, 09:09:04 am
I had the misfortune of working at a supermarket earlier this year. Needs must. Anyway, the pickers had a hard time picking their orders at times, because shelf stacking was often not as efficient as it could have been. Plus, the supermarkets have a habit of moving products around to keep shoppers on their toes. Additionally, each store has a different layout, so would need a bespoke version of the app. Supermarkets also have a vested interest in having people wandering around their stores.

On a related first-world problem, supermarkets operate so cheaply* because they are staffed by armies of people paid marginally over minimum wage, often toiling under stressful conditions. I did 12 weeks and it was horrendous.

* To them.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on December 31, 2013, 09:53:05 am
We ran out of Hovis bread mix last night so I had to dig out the dried yeast and strong flour so I could put the bread machine on for a loaf in the morning.

It was touch and go, I can tell you.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on December 31, 2013, 10:13:26 am
Supermarkets also have a vested interest in having people wandering around their stores.

I think you'll find it is a little more complicated than that.

Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Thor on January 01, 2014, 01:04:17 pm
The satellite TV signal keeps breaking up, 'cos of the wind.

Something ought to be done.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Gus on January 01, 2014, 01:22:19 pm
There were 6 people in front of me in the supermarket line, and they would not open another line. I had to wait a full 8 minutes before I could pay and get out..
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mike on January 01, 2014, 04:30:01 pm
Our cleaner has announced she's stopping working.  From conversations in the pub 2 days ago, I think the whole village will be on the lookout for a new one.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: CrinklyLion on January 02, 2014, 10:46:36 am
Because my cleaner comes on Wednesdays and doesn't work Christmas Day or NYD, nobody has stolen the dirt around here for 2 weeks!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on January 02, 2014, 01:34:04 pm
Because my cleaner comes on Wednesdays and doesn't work Christmas Day or NYD, nobody has stolen the dirt around here for 2 weeks!

We have a similar problem with the non-collection of bins.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on January 02, 2014, 05:14:29 pm
The pineapple is not ripe; we'll have to eat mango!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on January 02, 2014, 05:27:50 pm
Just download it then  ;)

Nifty. I have the Tesco app on my phone but it didn't do that last time I looked - but that's probably because I don't look at it often, because I can't get a signal in our local Tesco, though I note that Clubcard members get use of in-store Wi-Fi, so maybe that's worth exploring.

The Waitrose app doesn't have that feature. But Waitrose does have free coffee.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on January 02, 2014, 07:22:58 pm
So I've heard... but they don't have it in either of my two nearest Waitrosen. You can only imagine how deprived I feel.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rogerzilla on January 02, 2014, 07:31:22 pm
More coffee woes.  We have a filter machine and cafetiere blend coffee (it's more coarsely ground) instead of filter blend.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rogerzilla on January 02, 2014, 07:32:12 pm
There were 6 people in front of me in the supermarket line, and they would not open another line. I had to wait a full 8 minutes before I could pay and get out..
That's a "Falling Down" moment really.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on January 02, 2014, 09:06:17 pm
From Twitter
http://instagram.com/p/irHhblgXUS/ (http://instagram.com/p/irHhblgXUS/)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on January 07, 2014, 09:58:52 am
I had a stretchy elastic piece between my lanyard and my ID badge to save me having to bend and twist to reach the door openers, but it broke.

My colleagues are organising a tv appeal, something like the ones for the Dogs' Trust.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Julian on January 08, 2014, 08:24:47 am
My nook ran out of battery power on the tube this morning so I couldn't find out what happens next in Game of Thrones and (worse) was reduced to reading the Metro. 
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on January 08, 2014, 09:34:58 am
I had forgot to the set the timer on my coffee robot for this morning. I came down to find no hot coffee and had to press the 'on' button myself and wait an additional five minutes for it to grind and brew. I nearly died.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on January 08, 2014, 09:51:28 am
Our rubbish collection is being rescheduled to later in the day so on Fridays we'll have bin bags on the pavements for a few hours longer than we are used to. Hopefully house prices won't be affected.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on January 08, 2014, 10:45:32 am
My nook ran out of battery power on the tube this morning so I couldn't find out what happens next in Game of Thrones and (worse) was reduced to reading the Metro.

BTDTGTTS. I feel your pain, Julian. Relieved to hear you made it through to the other side.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on January 08, 2014, 11:07:32 am
The scones we are scoffing with butter, jam and clotted cream are slightly soggy.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on January 08, 2014, 11:42:12 am
My nook ran out of battery power on the tube this morning so I couldn't find out what happens next in Game of Thrones and (worse) was reduced to reading the Metro.

There surely must be a support group for those who have this most unfortunate experience.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: geraldc on January 08, 2014, 11:42:59 am
Carry a portable charger!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: TimC on January 08, 2014, 12:23:09 pm
Carry a portable charger!

Such a response discounts the considerable personal trauma suffered by those in such an unfortunate position, undermines the good work being done by any support groups out there as intimated by Ian, and completely misses the point of the thread, which is to be allowed to bemoan the completely trivial as though it were life-threatening.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on January 08, 2014, 12:52:17 pm
I agree, Tim.  I hope she's managing to make it through the day like the professional I know she is.

Carry a portable charger!

You should be ashamed of yourself, Gerald.  It's this sort of irresponsible victim-blaming attitude that diverts attention away from a very serious social and literary problem.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: TimC on January 08, 2014, 01:36:34 pm
Indeed rr. Something Must Be Done.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on January 08, 2014, 02:11:07 pm
You can't buy fresh root ginger in the M&S Simply Food near the office. Thus I won't be able to have my lemon & ginger tea this afternoon.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: red marley on January 08, 2014, 02:14:43 pm
I'm having to resort to the toffee pennies in my Christmas Quality Street.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on January 11, 2014, 11:00:59 am
Whitstable fish market has no native oysters. The fishmonger says he's refusing to stock them at the moment because they're crap and overpriced.

I had to settle for rock oysters instead!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jacomus on January 11, 2014, 06:10:46 pm
Whitstable fish market has no native oysters. The fishmonger says he's refusing to stock them at the moment because they're crap and overpriced.

I had to settle for rock oysters instead!

An unsettling state of affairs, indeed.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Feanor on January 11, 2014, 06:58:23 pm
You can't buy fresh root ginger in the M&S Simply Food near the office.

A cow-orker from Geordie-land once went into a supermarket in Newcastle, and in amongst his basket of items was some root ginger.

At the checkout, the assistant swiped through all the other items, but picked up the root ginger, looked at it, and put it in a bin under the desk.   When asked "Can I have that, please?" the assistant said: "The stick?  You want this stick?"
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on January 11, 2014, 07:08:26 pm
You can't buy fresh root ginger in the M&S Simply Food near the office.

A cow-orker from Geordie-land once went into a supermarket in Newcastle, and in amongst his basket of items was some root ginger.

At the checkout, the assistant swiped through all the other items, but picked up the root ginger, looked at it, and put it in a bin under the desk.   When asked "Can I have that, please?" the assistant said: "The stick?  You want this stick?"
That made oi larf!  ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on January 11, 2014, 08:03:22 pm
You can't buy fresh root ginger in the M&S Simply Food near the office.

A cow-orker from Geordie-land once went into a supermarket in Newcastle, and in amongst his basket of items was some root ginger.

At the checkout, the assistant swiped through all the other items, but picked up the root ginger, looked at it, and put it in a bin under the desk.   When asked "Can I have that, please?" the assistant said: "The stick?  You want this stick?"
That made oi larf!  ;D

And me too, also, as well!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on January 12, 2014, 07:23:14 am
And me.

I've had to help checkout staff with product recognition on occasion but never had one do that. Priceless.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Euan Uzami on January 12, 2014, 07:58:32 am
And me.

I've had to help checkout staff with product recognition on occasion but never had one do that. Priceless.
I have been known to be buying apples, then when they're obviously trying to figure out which variety of apples they are, look at them like they're stupid and say "err...they're *apples*?!"
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on January 12, 2014, 10:43:30 am
I had to tell the checkout guy what peas in the pod were once, and ended up splitting a pod to show him.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: closetleftie on January 12, 2014, 12:13:53 pm
I had to tell the checkout guy what peas in the pod were once, and ended up splitting a pod to show him.

The proles are soooo uneducated, aren't they?  ;D ;)


 :-*
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: red marley on January 12, 2014, 12:39:09 pm
A cow-orker from Geordie-land once went into a supermarket in Newcastle, and in amongst his basket of items was some root ginger.

At the checkout, the assistant swiped through all the other items, but picked up the root ginger, looked at it, and put it in a bin under the desk.   When asked "Can I have that, please?" the assistant said: "The stick?  You want this stick?"

It just goes to show that all that anti-ginger prejudice is really just borne out of ignorance.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on January 12, 2014, 08:16:03 pm
The special door for upperclass passengers wasn't working so I had to use the economy door!

And Stand in a queue!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on January 12, 2014, 11:07:49 pm
A cow-orker from Geordie-land once went into a supermarket in Newcastle, and in amongst his basket of items was some root ginger.

At the checkout, the assistant swiped through all the other items, but picked up the root ginger, looked at it, and put it in a bin under the desk.   When asked "Can I have that, please?" the assistant said: "The stick?  You want this stick?"

It just goes to show that all that anti-ginger prejudice is really just borne out of ignorance.

jo wins the internets again!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on January 13, 2014, 01:01:23 pm
Those who have never experienced it can only imagine the extra mainenance required when a red setter occupies the same living space as a couple of Rohloff hubs.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on January 13, 2014, 01:59:09 pm
Those who have never experienced it can only imagine the extra mainenance required when a red setter occupies the same living space as a couple of Rohloff hubs.

Is this like a doggy version of the long-haired lesbians problem?

(I fished a spectacular oily hairball out of one of my bike's chain tubes yesterday.  It reminded me of owning a Dyson.)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Auntie Helen on January 13, 2014, 02:23:11 pm
I may need your Rohloff experience, Wow, now I have bought a machine with one. Although it was serviced 1000km ago so I guess it doesn't need anything for a while.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on January 13, 2014, 02:38:19 pm
My beautiful cohab lovingly prepared lunch for me last night - a dressed puy lentil salad, with lamb's leaf lettuce, cherry tomatoes and mozzerella pearls.  On the side was a little pot of carrot sticks and hummus.

Unfortunately, when I came to eat it today, the reusable 0.33l Addis screw-top pot that she'd selected for the carrot sticks was so deep that I couldn't effectively dip them in the hummus that she'd also put in there.

Utter torment, I tell you.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on January 13, 2014, 03:04:24 pm
Those who have never experienced it can only imagine the extra mainenance required when a red setter occupies the same living space as a couple of Rohloff hubs.

Is this like a doggy version of the long-haired lesbians problem?

(I fished a spectacular oily hairball out of one of my bike's chain tubes yesterday.  It reminded me of owning a Dyson.)

What has being a lesbian to do with hair balls? I get hairballs all over the place...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on January 13, 2014, 03:05:36 pm
What has being a lesbian to do with hair balls? I get hairballs all over the place...

People tend to ask you what you "do".  To which the canonical reply is "spend a lot of time unclogging the hoover".
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mrcharly-YHT on January 13, 2014, 03:30:11 pm
What has being a lesbian to do with hair balls? I get hairballs all over the place...

People tend to ask you what you "do".  To which the canonical reply is "spend a lot of time unclogging the hoover".

That's why it is a good idea to get a dyson. Untroubled by long hair in large quantities (unlike the bathroom shower drain).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on January 13, 2014, 03:32:05 pm
What has being a lesbian to do with hair balls? I get hairballs all over the place...

People tend to ask you what you "do".  To which the canonical reply is "spend a lot of time unclogging the hoover".

That's why it is a good idea to get a dyson. Untroubled by long hair in large quantities (unlike the bathroom shower drain).

*sporfle*

They're only untroubled because the suction is crap from the outset.

(Former owner of about 4 different Dysons, all hopeless.  How's that for a first-world problem?)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on January 13, 2014, 03:55:50 pm
Unfortunately, when I came to eat it today, the reusable 0.33l Addis screw-top pot that she'd selected for the carrot sticks was so deep that I couldn't effectively dip them in the hummus that she'd also put in there.

Give her a good spanking when you get home.

And then after you've finished having fun, punish her for the lunch error.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: TimC on January 13, 2014, 06:02:35 pm
My beautiful cohab lovingly prepared lunch for me last night - a dressed puy lentil salad, with lamb's leaf lettuce, cherry tomatoes and mozzerella pearls.  On the side was a little pot of carrot sticks and hummus.

Unfortunately, when I came to eat it today, the reusable 0.33l Addis screw-top pot that she'd selected for the carrot sticks was so deep that I couldn't effectively dip them in the hummus that she'd also put in there.

Utter torment, I tell you.

That's what latte spoons are for!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on January 13, 2014, 06:27:54 pm
What has being a lesbian to do with hair balls? I get hairballs all over the place...

People tend to ask you what you "do".  To which the canonical reply is "spend a lot of time unclogging the hoover".

That's why it is a good idea to get a dyson. Untroubled by long hair in large quantities (unlike the bathroom shower drain).

*sporfle*

They're only untroubled because the suction is crap from the outset.

(Former owner of about 4 different Dysons, all hopeless.  How's that for a first-world problem?)
That's a genuine FWP. Anywhere else, you'd have a maid do it for you.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: barakta on January 13, 2014, 06:48:20 pm
Also the reference to long-haired lesbians is

1) to differentiate from the short-haired variety of lesbian...
2) two people in a partnership with long hair which is unusual as it's more uncommon to have a male-female partnership where both people have long hair...

So not exclusive to "lesbians"... 
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jacomus on January 13, 2014, 07:21:20 pm
Overhead today, but better fitted to this thread...

1. I left my gym yoga mat on the train last night
2. *horrified* What did you do?!
1. *horrified* I had to take my home one this morning
2. Dis-gusting
1. I know! And, now I have to buy another one
2. I'm sorry, honey, you'd think someone would have told you. Those things aren't cheap!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on January 13, 2014, 09:28:24 pm
Also the reference to long-haired lesbians is

1) to differentiate from the short-haired variety of lesbian...
2) two people in a partnership with long hair which is unusual as it's more uncommon to have a male-female partnership where both people have long hair...

So not exclusive to "lesbians"...

I know a heterosexual couple with a chap whose hair is waist-length, blond and glorious. The woman has lovely, long, light brown hair.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Auntie Helen on January 13, 2014, 09:32:51 pm
My ISP has upgraded me to PHP 5.4 which has stopped me from adding to or editing my WordPress blog. I wanted to write a nice long post about my new Velomobile to share with the world but I can't. And I haven't got a clue how to fix it (apart from emailing 1&1 tech support to ask for them to change me back to PHP 5.2 - some chance!)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Gus on January 13, 2014, 09:42:07 pm
My ISP has upgraded me to PHP 5.4 which has stopped me from adding to or editing my WordPress blog. I wanted to write a nice long post about my new Velomobile to share with the world but I can't. And I haven't got a clue how to fix it (apart from emailing 1&1 tech support to ask for them to change me back to PHP 5.2 - some chance!)

Yet another problem, I understand the words "blog" & "velomobile" but how they are connected are a conundrum  ???
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on January 13, 2014, 09:54:09 pm
My beautiful cohab lovingly prepared lunch for me last night - a dressed puy lentil salad, with lamb's leaf lettuce, cherry tomatoes and mozzerella pearls.  On the side was a little pot of carrot sticks and hummus.

Unfortunately, when I came to eat it today, the reusable 0.33l Addis screw-top pot that she'd selected for the carrot sticks was so deep that I couldn't effectively dip them in the hummus that she'd also put in there.

Utter torment, I tell you.
I rang Blue Peter about this and they're dusting off the totaliser and starting an appeal.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on January 13, 2014, 09:56:48 pm
My ISP has upgraded me to PHP 5.4 which has stopped me from adding to or editing my WordPress blog.

This is a known problem. Are you getting a "Error establishing a database connection" message? It's to do with how PHP5.4 handles and stores your login passwords. I more or less understand it, but I'm not sure I could run to explaining how to fix it...

It's probably worth contacting 1and1 - as it's a known problem, they should know how to resolve it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on January 14, 2014, 11:40:03 am
The person I'm going to see about a ramp has a thick privet hedge in their front garden so google maps doesn't help me determine if it's rampable from the comfort of my office.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mrcharly-YHT on January 14, 2014, 11:47:59 am
I left a herb teabag in my insulated mug over christmas, and now it has gone mouldy and stuck to the bottom of the mug.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on January 14, 2014, 02:55:00 pm
I may need your Rohloff experience, Wow, now I have bought a machine with one. Although it was serviced 1000km ago so I guess it doesn't need anything for a while.
I'm always pleased to help, but this hub is currently in Rotterdam, is it not? THe only thing you are likely to need when you have your year in Germany is an oil-change kit. I have oil so you could pack a couple of small bottles in your luggage.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: geraldc on January 14, 2014, 03:08:56 pm
I was eating a scotch egg in the pub, and my friend got excited as he thought it was an arancini (those deep fried risotto balls). Not as bad as mistaking mushy peas for guacamole, but close.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Moleman76 on January 14, 2014, 07:29:42 pm
My nook ran out of battery power on the tube this morning so I couldn't find out what happens next in Game of Thrones and (worse) was reduced to reading the Metro.

There surely must be a support group for those who have this most unfortunate experience.

The lack-of-nookie power experience is indeed unfortunate.  There are pills to help.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Auntie Helen on January 14, 2014, 10:09:30 pm
I may need your Rohloff experience, Wow, now I have bought a machine with one. Although it was serviced 1000km ago so I guess it doesn't need anything for a while.
I'm always pleased to help, but this hub is currently in Rotterdam, is it not? THe only thing you are likely to need when you have your year in Germany is an oil-change kit. I have oil so you could pack a couple of small bottles in your luggage.
Yes the hub is currently in Rotterdam and not needing a service, I assume, seeing as it was last done 1000km ago. However, I'm not sure of the service interval on Rohloffs so I might need to do it next year. Perhaps you'll have to come over for a visit with Mrs Wow!!

Mind you, a different chap with a Versatile has been giving me loads of really helpful advice and has offered to help with any servicing etc (he only lives two hours' drive away!) He's had two Versatiles so is very familiar with them and has done 40,000km so undoubtedly has done a fair bit of servicing.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on January 15, 2014, 01:49:45 pm
The bulb has gone in the toilets on this floor. I have to go down stairs :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rabbit on January 15, 2014, 03:50:10 pm
I am out of soya milk and I am going to get wet walking to the van to drive to the supermarket  >:(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on January 15, 2014, 04:05:46 pm
I have just done some online shopping at Sainsbury's for my Aged Parents who return from Foreign Travels today.
Sainsbury's did not list/stock the International New York Times they requested.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Greenbank on January 16, 2014, 09:19:53 am
I'd run out of goose fat to use for sautéing my Lyonnaise potatoes so I had to slum it and use butter.

Quelle horreur.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on January 16, 2014, 12:32:31 pm
I stocked up on goose fat when I was in Lidl at the weekend as they had it on special offer - something like 50p a pot, iirc.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: fboab on January 16, 2014, 01:17:57 pm
We have loads in the freezer, thanks to Lucy our Christmas Dinner.

It'll be there a while though- we don't eat potatoes.  :facepalm:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on January 16, 2014, 03:36:19 pm
I had to wear a pair of underpants two days running as the washing isn't drying in this ghastly weather.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Bledlow on January 16, 2014, 03:37:40 pm
How is this a First World problem? Don't you have dozens of pairs of underpants, & anyway are independent of weather for drying because of your tumble dryer (possibly integrated with your washing machine).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on January 16, 2014, 04:56:46 pm
I had to wear a pair of underpants two days running as the washing isn't drying in this ghastly weather.

Euuuuuw! TMI
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on January 19, 2014, 09:28:22 am
Exact Audio Copy keeps tagging my CD rips with the year of the re-issue, not the original release. Bunch of philistines.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PeteB99 on January 22, 2014, 11:37:58 am
My washing machine has thrown its drive belt. It's going to be a couple of days before I can do a machine wash again.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on January 22, 2014, 11:39:47 am
I can't get the online appointments system at my GPs surgery to work.  I may have to telephone them.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Morrisette on January 22, 2014, 11:56:47 am
My Graze box has an item in it that I have told them I do not like. And it was two days late!

Does anyone know of a support group?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on January 22, 2014, 12:11:16 pm
I'm hotdesking and I can't get the mouse over to the left hand side of the keyboard.

And it's a FORRIN kezboard lazout.

Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on January 23, 2014, 10:08:53 am
The grapes in our mid-week fruit basket are rather tiny.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Greenbank on January 25, 2014, 10:26:49 am
My daughter wasted two ballet lessons because she was too shy to join in.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on January 25, 2014, 12:31:03 pm
And it's a FORRIN kezboard lazout.

In Slovakia the keyboard layout is the same as a standard qwerty keyboard except the y and z have been swapped, exactly as you typed. This may be the layout of many central European countries.

Yeah - this was in Germany. After a few days I got used to it (although not the parentheses, which had moved a key to the left), but I left the 'z's in for comic effect.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Gus on January 25, 2014, 05:43:18 pm
And it's a FORRIN kezboard lazout.

In Slovakia the keyboard layout is the same as a standard qwerty keyboard except the y and z have been swapped, exactly as you typed. This may be the layout of many central European countries.

Yeah - this was in Germany. After a few days I got used to it (although not the parentheses, which had moved a key to the left), but I left the 'z's in for comic effect.

Come to the nordic countries, we have three extra letters added and each country have different placing of them  ::-)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on January 25, 2014, 05:47:57 pm
Nooo! It's bad enough just having to use a different keyboard/mouse.

I don't recall how old this keyboard is, but I've had the same mouse since about 2004.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on January 25, 2014, 05:59:04 pm
I can't get the online appointments system at my GPs surgery to work.  I may have to telephone them.

Wondered why you seem to have been quiet.   You're still in the queue ...   :D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Valiant on January 25, 2014, 08:13:00 pm
I have invites for 4 events tonight, I don't know which one to go to :'(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: cycleman on January 25, 2014, 08:32:48 pm
That's easy, go to all four  :D :thumbsup:  one after the other . by bike of course  ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Valiant on January 25, 2014, 08:51:45 pm
They're the type of parties you don't really leave lol
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on January 28, 2014, 09:08:57 pm
Attempting to purchase a silk boutonnière online, but the PayPal link doesn't work.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Gus on January 28, 2014, 09:31:43 pm
All 700Cx25 tubes on sale are sold out  >:( It will be horrible to pay full price.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on January 30, 2014, 06:59:45 pm
I'd be sitting on the beach. But it's raining.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on January 30, 2014, 07:20:01 pm
We're getting a bit overwhelmed by the biscuit situation at work.  The supply is far outstripping consumption.

I'm doing my best.  Honest.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kathy on January 30, 2014, 07:24:11 pm
I've just found some e-book versions of some books that used to be out of print and I've not read for 20 years. And my Kindle is out of battery, so I'll have to read it via the app on my iPhone. >:(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on January 30, 2014, 07:55:58 pm
I couldn't decide between the chocolate cappuccino and lemon Swiss rolls in Marks and Spencer yesterday and they had short best before dates so couldn't have both.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on January 31, 2014, 11:53:32 am
I reserved a library book online on 20th December and it still hasn't arrived although there are two copies available. I will have to email them to find out what isn't going on.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on February 01, 2014, 05:53:19 pm
What I think I need right now is an internet controlled oven....
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mcshroom on February 05, 2014, 05:06:21 pm
The pressure in my central heating system dropped too low for the boiler to kick in, so the house is cold.

Heating's now on but I'll have to wear a jumper for a little bit.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Diver300 on February 05, 2014, 06:13:06 pm
My home broadband isn't working. I've had to use dial up internet  tether the mobile phone / use work internet / use free wifi on the bus.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Auntie Helen on February 05, 2014, 06:15:58 pm
My home broadband is working incredibly slowly so I've had to put off doing some work and leave the computer. So I will have to think of something else to amuse me.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on February 05, 2014, 07:21:45 pm
Walked through the rain to my favourite restaurant in Milan only to find they have a new menu and there's no wild boar.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on February 05, 2014, 08:08:44 pm
It seems to be impossible to top up the data on David's iPhone on EE.
He can use the phone for calls; he doesn't even seem to be able to send a text.
I am unimpressed with CRAPPLE and EE.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on February 05, 2014, 09:11:34 pm
I pushed the strawberries right to the back of the fridge and now they're frozen strawberries. I had to use raspberries in my smoothy instead. Really, it's just like a third world country.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on February 06, 2014, 09:17:56 am
This morning, when tying up my hair, I noticed that the elastic had lost most of it's stretch and rather than my habitual double-twist, I had to do three twists to get it secure.

It totally upset my routine and I couldn't concentrate at all whilst I was moisturising.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on February 06, 2014, 10:27:47 am
I find the worst bit is when I get mascara in my beard.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rabbit on February 06, 2014, 02:50:29 pm
The avocado slices keep falling off my piri-piri hummus on toast
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on February 06, 2014, 04:30:32 pm
I typed the wrong number into the vending machine and got a kitKat instead of a Twix :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on February 06, 2014, 05:43:41 pm
Don't get your Snickers in a Twix!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on February 06, 2014, 06:18:34 pm
We are getting very cross about who is going to cover WW1 in our local monthly news organ.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pingu on February 06, 2014, 10:32:50 pm
I typed the wrong number into the vending machine and got a kitKat instead of a Twix :(

That sort of thing mars your day.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: tiermat on February 07, 2014, 08:34:46 am
Germanwings no longer do a flight at $REASONABLY_EARLY o'clock on a Monday, from MAN to CGN.

I may end up flying from another airport*...

*Yes, I realize the sensible option is NOT to fly, but then that doesn't occur to my manager!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on February 07, 2014, 08:59:00 am
I typed the wrong number into the vending machine and got a kitKat instead of a Twix :(

That sort of thing mars your day.

Indeed.   Bounty frustrate you.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: fboab on February 07, 2014, 10:56:36 am
I typed the wrong number into the vending machine and got a kitKat instead of a Twix :(

That sort of thing mars your day.

Indeed.   Bounty frustrate you.
Dealing with vending machines is no Picnic.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on February 07, 2014, 10:57:26 am
That's hardly giving him a boost, is it?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on February 07, 2014, 11:08:54 am
I think that we should be a bit Kinder to Wunja.   He's probably suffering Allsorts of issues and might even Flake out.   

He'll be needing a wee Refresher and hopefully he'll get his Prize next time he gets a bout of the Munchies.   
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: pcolbeck on February 07, 2014, 11:09:03 am
I've just used the last of the Monmouth's coffee beans. If I don't drive 5 miles to the deli at lunchtime to pick up a suitable replacement bag of beans I will have to have instant Coffee tomorrow morning.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on February 07, 2014, 11:23:39 am
Oh Pat - that's dreadful!  I shall be popping into Monmouth in Covent Garden this afternoon for a couple of bags of my usual - I can't imagine having to cope with instant.

Life without good coffee isn't really living.  It's just existing.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: pcolbeck on February 07, 2014, 11:26:49 am
It says something about my life that the nearest place I pass frequently that sells decent coffee beans is one of the stalls at St Pancras which is 200 miles from where I live.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on February 07, 2014, 11:28:36 am
Well, then, you don't belong in this thread at all - you don't even live in the First World!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: pcolbeck on February 07, 2014, 11:38:24 am
Well as I said there is a deli with artisan roast beans in Malton 5 miles away but I only go shopping when I have to. Kings Cross / St Pancras on the other hand I spend a fair amount of time kicking around due to seeing customers in London.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on February 07, 2014, 11:46:03 am
I was too upset last night to relate the worst part of the vending machine woes.
The Kitkat spiral turned impotently as there was no bar in the first spot.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on February 07, 2014, 02:27:55 pm
A sort of Twirl?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruth on February 07, 2014, 02:44:50 pm
A related catastrophe today.  I really really wanted a mint Aero and thought about it all the way through waiting for my prescription, then went out of my way to go in the paper shop and get my mint Aero, and they didn't have any.

I had to have a double decker instead.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on February 07, 2014, 02:49:02 pm
Well, that's no compensation.  It's not the same sort of thing at all.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: pcolbeck on February 07, 2014, 02:50:13 pm
Bought a load of cheap CDs in HMV Leeds on Wednesday. Though I might play one this afternoon but forgot we no longer have a CD player and I will have to rip them first.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rabbit on February 10, 2014, 03:47:21 am
Heading to Scotland without a bicycle sucks
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: orienteer on February 10, 2014, 01:53:27 pm
Don't usually watch commercial channels, but Ch4 has some decent programmes (besides the indecent ones).

Why the f..k is the sound volume during the ads double the normal level? Sooo much effort to hit the mute button while the ads are on.  ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on February 10, 2014, 02:11:53 pm
Why the f..k is the sound volume during the ads double the normal level? Sooo much effort to hit the mute button while the ads are on.  ;D

It isn't.  Such things are strictly regulated.

Which doesn't mean that advertisers can't compress[1] their audio to make it sound louder at a given level...


[1] http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dynamic_range_compression#Broadcasting
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on February 10, 2014, 02:27:36 pm
Coworker snapped the heel of her Louboutins and sprained an ankle after stepping on a Cava cork.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on February 10, 2014, 02:29:39 pm
The poor thing - how's she bearing up, Andrij?

I appear to have mislaid my office security badge and I need to borrow my colleagues' every time I need to go to the kitchen to make coffee.  I don't know how much longer I can cope.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on February 10, 2014, 05:17:52 pm
The hot water tap broke and then the replacement kettle broke. So now we have to use the other hot water tap, in the kitchen area, a good minute's walk away.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Julian on February 10, 2014, 06:33:54 pm
The website that will allow me to renew my professional registration isn't working and I might have to remember to do it tomorrow.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on February 10, 2014, 07:09:32 pm
The website that will allow me to renew my professional registration isn't working and I might have to remember to do it tomorrow.

There's a professional register for splendid people ?  I never knew that!    What letters do you get after your name ?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: fboab on February 11, 2014, 09:50:19 am
I'm spending today eating my feelings but have only one (70% dark, obviously) chocolate bar left. I will have to move on to salt & pepper cashew nuts shortly.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruth on February 11, 2014, 07:47:47 pm
fboab, have you contacted FEMA?

I have run out of bubble bath.  Shouldn't someone be organising an aid package or something?  At this rate I'll have to clean the bath before the cleaner comes on Thursday.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on February 11, 2014, 07:59:21 pm
Cat is pinning me to my chair and I want a cup of tea.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on February 11, 2014, 08:05:00 pm
That cat is an utter fiend.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on February 11, 2014, 08:28:48 pm
The Turkish cafe where I went for a pre concert mixed grill gave me so much food I couldn't finish it...
I had to eat quickly as I was in such a hurry & now feel terribly bloated.  I may go "pop" during " Death & the maiden"!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on February 11, 2014, 09:05:29 pm
And now... it's really hard to watch a subtitled movie *and* keep an eye on twitter.

My day gets harder and harder.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on February 11, 2014, 10:35:34 pm
The taxi I took earlier today had free Wifi.
I was carrying nothing which could use this on my ten minute trip.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on February 11, 2014, 11:04:54 pm
I spent a good half hour sitting on the floor in front of our tech cupboard, setting up the new Billion BiPAC 7800DX and upgrading the hard drives in our NAS.

Now I've got a square bottom.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mattc on February 12, 2014, 01:18:03 pm
And now... it's really hard to watch a subtitled movie *and* keep an eye on twitter.

My day gets harder and harder.
Only in the 1st World would people call their cat "twitter".  ::-)


 ;)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on February 14, 2014, 01:20:24 pm
I've got some brand new vegan walking boots, and I wore them to work before they were broken in.  Now I've had to walk across the road to buy a blister plaster.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mcshroom on February 14, 2014, 03:03:52 pm
Why do Vegans need walking? ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: geraldc on February 14, 2014, 03:05:46 pm
I was eating smoked salmon sandwiches whilst working at my desk, and now my keyboard smells of fish
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on February 14, 2014, 03:07:31 pm
I've got some brand new vegan walking boots, and I wore them to work before they were broken in.  Now I've had to walk across the road to buy a blister plaster.
I'd take the boots back. They were obviously trying to eat your foot and therefore most certainly not vegans.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on February 14, 2014, 03:11:20 pm
;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mattc on February 14, 2014, 07:52:11 pm
Due to a wet lunchtime and limited choice of facilities, I spent an hour today listening to 20-somethings banging on about their 'travelling' in the 3rd world (mainly Thailand, NZ and Oz).

Luckily  they only had a day's work for me.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kathy on February 15, 2014, 09:44:21 pm
Fancied an after-dinner drink, but the only port in the house needs filtering and decanting. :'(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Gus on February 18, 2014, 02:51:44 pm
My fatbike allmost can't fit into my bathroom when I need to clean it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pickled Onion on February 20, 2014, 08:31:35 am
My train this morning arrived the wrong way round. Yes, it was back to front. No-one knew where the doors would be and we all had to change places on the platform.

I'm going to feel out of sorts all day now! Who can I complain to?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: greenmeansgo on February 20, 2014, 10:37:58 am
It's not been very sunny recently, but now it's so bright that I have to close the blinds so that I don't get lots of glare off the monitor.

Other weeks it's sunny during the week, but rainy at the weekend so I don't get to enjoy the good weather!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Gus on February 20, 2014, 10:09:46 pm
My train this morning arrived the wrong way round. Yes, it was back to front. No-one knew where the doors would be and we all had to change places on the platform.

I'm going to feel out of sorts all day now! Who can I complain to?

It could be worse, imagine it arrived on time.  :o
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: tiermat on February 21, 2014, 07:45:58 am
Whilst on a transport theme...

I have had a great week in Limburg an der Lahn (twinned with Lichfield), getting some good work done.

At 16:00 yesterday I received an email saying that there is industrial action taking place at only one airport in Germany, the one I am flying from, today...

Bother!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on February 21, 2014, 07:52:43 am
My train this morning arrived the wrong way round. Yes, it was back to front. No-one knew where the doors would be and we all had to change places on the platform.

I'm going to feel out of sorts all day now! Who can I complain to?

It could be worse, imagine it arrived on time.  :o

We're in UK Gus, that surely will never happen...     :D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on February 21, 2014, 12:12:33 pm
Fancied an after-dinner drink, but the only port in the house needs filtering and decanting. :'(
I find that this weather I'm not fussy - any port in a storm.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pingu on February 21, 2014, 12:14:29 pm
My coffee mug's filter is busticated  :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on February 21, 2014, 01:46:20 pm
Ah, lunch!  Falafel, home-made hummous with chives, halloumi, and sweet peppery leaf salad.  Excellent!

But, oh!  No wholemeal pittas :o  I had to settle for white. 

My day is spoiled. :( :( :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Moultonaught on February 21, 2014, 02:55:56 pm
Our shiny new cooker wasn't supplied with a connecting hose! Apparently it's because we didn't use the John Lewis installation option!  ::-)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on February 25, 2014, 01:39:44 pm
Ah, lunch!  Falafel, home-made hummous with chives, halloumi, and sweet peppery leaf salad.  Excellent!

But, oh!  No wholemeal pittas :o  I had to settle for white. 

My day is spoiled. :( :( :(

:o No Waitrose within two miles of work!

But alumming it in Tescos, I managed to get wholemeal pittas this morning.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on February 28, 2014, 09:51:58 pm
Ah, lunch!  Falafel, home-made hummous with chives, halloumi, and sweet peppery leaf salad.  Excellent!

But, oh!  No wholemeal pittas :o  I had to settle for white. 

My day is spoiled. :( :( :(

:o No Waitrose within two miles of work!

But alumming it in Tescos, I managed to get wholemeal pittas this morning.
Is this a reference to stupormarket arson?!!!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Oaky on March 07, 2014, 09:55:57 pm
All of my favourite tumblers are in the dishwasher, so I'm reduced to drinking my wine from an actual wine glass!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mcshroom on March 10, 2014, 02:49:10 pm
Virgin trains WiFi won't let me log phone and eBook reader on at the same time so I'm having to browse the forum on 3g while my book downloads.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on March 22, 2014, 05:01:51 pm
It would appear that a Waitrose card only entitles one to a medium cappuccino whereas I made the mistake of ordering a large. The drinks were already prepared by the time the till staff made me aware of the fact. Ever eager to please, I suggested that they throw it away and pour a regular one. It was decided that I should have the large at no charge.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: red marley on March 22, 2014, 06:24:33 pm
The newsagent had mistakenly put the Telegraph magazine inside my copy of the Saturday Guardian instead of Guardian Weekend. I'm now worried I might go a little bit right wing.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on March 22, 2014, 07:02:06 pm
Now Wash Your Hands.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on March 22, 2014, 10:27:02 pm
The little bottles of basil-infused olive oil included with our Finest range oven-ready pizzas tonight were almost solid, having been in a chiller cabinet.

Julian had to hold them both under the hot tap whilst the pizzas were in the oven so that she could drizzle the oil as per the serving suggestion.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruth on March 22, 2014, 10:29:17 pm
The little bottles of basil-infused olive oil included with our Finest range oven-ready pizzas tonight were almost solid, having been in a chiller cabinet.

Julian had to hold them both under the hot tap whilst the pizzas were in the oven so that she could drizzle the oil as per the serving suggestion.

That is completely unacceptable.  You shouldn't have to spend your valuable time liquefying oil, that is supposed to be drizzlable. 
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on March 22, 2014, 10:39:38 pm
The little bottles of basil-infused olive oil included with our Finest range oven-ready pizzas tonight were almost solid, having been in a chiller cabinet.

Julian had to hold them both under the hot tap whilst the pizzas were in the oven so that she could drizzle the oil as per the serving suggestion.
I'm keeping you both in my thoughts.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Hot Flatus on March 22, 2014, 10:49:13 pm
The newsagent had mistakenly put the Telegraph magazine inside my copy of the Saturday Guardian instead of Guardian Weekend. I'm now worried I might go a little bit right wing.

What makes you think it was a mistake?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on March 22, 2014, 10:53:16 pm
I'm keeping you both in my thoughts.

You're very kind - that means a lot to us at this difficult time.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Hot Flatus on March 22, 2014, 11:09:47 pm
I'm just sorry you have to shop at Tescos
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pingu on March 22, 2014, 11:22:20 pm
I'm keeping you both in my thoughts.

You're very kind - that means a lot to us at this difficult time.

Is there a book of condolence that I can sign?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on March 22, 2014, 11:26:00 pm
I'm just sorry you have to shop at Tescos

It was too far to walk to Waitrose and we were so hungry  :-[

Is there a book of condolence that I can sign?

That might help us find some closure - we could pick one up at John Lewis when we pop into town tomorrow, I'm sure they'll have something suitable.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on March 23, 2014, 09:50:51 am
Anointing your pizza with essence of mustachioed cyclist ?  :D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on March 23, 2014, 10:36:12 am
How are you both this morning? I hope you were able to get at least some sleep.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on March 24, 2014, 01:50:51 pm
We're bearing up as best we can.  Julian suggested a night at the London Lesbian & Gay Film Festival, followed by a light supper at Wagamama on the South Bank and I think it really helped us try and move on.

Thanks for your continued support, Kirst.  It's great to feel surrounded by so much love and warmth.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on March 24, 2014, 03:55:08 pm
Your plight has really touched me. If it's not too presumptuous, and not triggering for you, I think I'd like to organise a vigil to honour your suffering.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on March 24, 2014, 09:40:01 pm
The plight of those faced with undrizzable olive oil has so stuck me that I had to do something.

So tonight I sponsored myself to cycle through Croydon town centre. I collected 14p. I know money isn't the solution but I hope it can a go a little way towards making things better in these darkened hours.

I think the only real solution is some kind of mini olive oil bottle heater.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: TimC on March 24, 2014, 10:51:37 pm
I raised some money on C & J's behalf today, too. They'll be heartened to know I spent it on a bottle of la Motte Shiraz 2009. It was jolly splendid and helped me no end in empathising with their plight.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: fboab on March 25, 2014, 09:35:19 am
I lit a candle for you, C & J, you're in our thoughts. I hate the feeling of helplessness, I wish there was more I could do.

I know it's not really any compensation, but I hope you have claimed?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Bledlow on March 25, 2014, 12:09:01 pm
We're bearing up as best we can.  Julian suggested a night at the London Lesbian & Gay Film Festival, followed by a light supper at Wagamama ...
Slumming?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on March 25, 2014, 01:14:32 pm
Your plight has really touched me. If it's not too presumptuous, and not triggering for you, I think I'd like to organise a vigil to honour your suffering.

We're both overwhelmed, thank you.

I know money isn't the solution but I hope it can a go a little way towards making things better in these darkened hours.

I think the only real solution is some kind of mini olive oil bottle heater.

It's still too early for us to start to think practically like that, but to have such fine friends that can makes us feel truly blessed.

I raised some money on C & J's behalf today, too. They'll be heartened to know I spent it on a bottle of la Motte Shiraz 2009. It was jolly splendid and helped me no end in empathising with their plight.

Tim, if there's one thing I've learned through all of this terrible pain, it's that you cope however you can.

I lit a candle for you, C & J, you're in our thoughts. I hate the feeling of helplessness, I wish there was more I could do.

I know it's not really any compensation, but I hope you have claimed?

As I said, it's still such early days for us, but knowing that a robust legal remedy is an option for us in the fullness of time is comforting.

We're bearing up as best we can.  Julian suggested a night at the London Lesbian & Gay Film Festival, followed by a light supper at Wagamama ...
Slumming?

No, not at all - we often seek solace by spending time with people poorer and less fortunate than ourselves. 

Quite often, a chance conversation or even a kind word spoken between strangers in a popular canteen will go a long way.  And who knows who might also be suffering from a similar tragedy?   Solidified drizzling products can happen to anyone, across all strata of our society.

We must be strong, for ourselves and for others.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on March 25, 2014, 01:22:14 pm
Solidified drizzling products can happen to anyone, across all strata of our society.
Into each life some hail must fall.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on March 25, 2014, 06:27:49 pm
Would it help if we created a motivational post on social media?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: TimC on March 25, 2014, 11:19:04 pm
Now I know this thread has met its purpose. We should be thankful that few of us have had to endure the hardships that Charlotte and Julian have - and I like to think they did it on our behalf. We should bow our heads at the selfless sacrifice they have made, and think ourselves lucky that few of us have had to suffer the indignity and inconvenience of a jammed-up oil drizzler. Now I know what suffering is; it puts the rest of my life into perspective.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on March 25, 2014, 11:23:30 pm
It really pains me to think that Charlotte's oil drizzler might be jammed up. I hope the jam was Wilkins'.

The key question is this: who will lick the jam off Charlotte's oil drizzler?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on March 26, 2014, 09:32:33 am
Charlotte, I've been on the phone. Geldof is busy, but Bono says he can come to your humble kitchen and shed a tear on camera.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on March 26, 2014, 10:02:46 am
Oh Wunja, you're so wonderful - that would be really a very special thing.

Julian and I were holding it together quite well until we read the news this morning about Gwyneth and Chris's split.  Such awful, terrible news - it's just one thing after another and at this rate, I'm not sure how we're going to keep going.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on March 26, 2014, 10:20:40 am
I'm locked up in prison and I cannot get hold of a copy of Brain Sewell's "Naked Emperors: Criticisms of English Contemporary Art".
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Zipperhead on March 26, 2014, 01:49:35 pm
I'm sorry to have to ask this, in your time of grief and suffering, but it is most important.

Has anybody contacted the Grauniad's newsdesk or one of their feature writers?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on March 26, 2014, 02:19:11 pm
Oh Wunja, you're so wonderful - that would be really a very special thing.

Julian and I were holding it together quite well until we read the news this morning about Gwyneth and Chris's split.  Such awful, terrible news - it's just one thing after another and at this rate, I'm not sure how we're going to keep going.
I think she got tired of pretending to like his whiny dull music.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on March 26, 2014, 03:15:28 pm
Charlotte, I have taken the liberty of discussing your situation with a QUILTBAG social worker, to see if she could offer any advice. She says that if you were proper QUILTBAGs, you'd be making your own pizzas and topping them with home-grown organic vegetables.  ;D But, she also says she's coming down to London this weekend and will be happy to offer any assistance she can. She was a psychiatric nurse before she was a social worker, so she can offer a holistic assessment of your mental states, and can probably get you the good medication should your trauma prove to be enduring. We've organised a  session for tomorrow where we will all concentrate on visualising healing for you both.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on March 26, 2014, 03:28:17 pm
My name is Charlotte and I am Not A Proper QUILTBAG  :-[

(http://img.tesco.com/Groceries/pi/638%5C5053947787638%5CIDShot_225x225.jpg)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on March 26, 2014, 04:51:56 pm
Nobody wants to eat pizzas with bases made of cauliflower and hemp anyway.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: shyumu on March 26, 2014, 07:02:17 pm
I didn't care about Charlotte and Julian's solidified oil problem at first. I felt that as peak balsamic vinegar dressing approaches it is the responsibility of us all to find alternative sources of lubrication for bread and salad products.

That was, until my in flight salad was delivered to my business class seat with a bottle of immobilized olive oil based dressing.

I've asked for a copy of the black box recipes. Typo. Black box recording of the flight to help me understand and eventually come to terms with this incident.

I'm now moved to empathise with C&J.  Damn it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on March 26, 2014, 07:38:11 pm
Another revelation and conversion as significant as the road to Damascus.

Meanwhile in other news our evening meal is in danger of being totally inedible due to the non-availability of penne pasta in the household. It looks like we will have to try and make do with fusilli instead . . .

Oh! The humanity! Where is Brigitte Bardot when you need her?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on March 26, 2014, 07:41:09 pm
My name is Charlotte and I am Not A Proper QUILTBAG  :-[

(http://img.tesco.com/Groceries/pi/638%5C5053947787638%5CIDShot_225x225.jpg)

Cell-sized pizzas at last. With green mitochondria. Yumm!!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on March 26, 2014, 10:10:10 pm
Strewth, here you are bewailing lack of drizzle when some footballers have to get by on merely £50,000  a week, and certain east European folk have to now pay taxes on purchases in UK, whatever is the world coming to?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on March 28, 2014, 05:19:16 pm
One of my chocolate raisins had no chocolate at all on it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Euan Uzami on April 01, 2014, 10:11:26 pm
Door opening etiquette: it's easier to hold a door open for somebody when it opens towards you.
Approaching a door that opens away from me, I can see a  woman coming the other way on the other side. I'm going to get there slightly before her. Do I:
a) Try to hold it open with one arm raised and awkwardly stand back as she ducks through while being forced to smell my armpit
b) Stand there like a lemon giving her no option but to hold it open for me, or
c) Just barge through apologising?

Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: jsabine on April 01, 2014, 10:28:12 pm
d) Walk through calmly (having seamlessly adjusted your pace to arrive more than slightly before her), enabling you to gracefully hold the door from the other side, where it's a damn sight easier.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Morrisette on April 02, 2014, 09:24:38 am
I need to break up with my yoga class. A new place has opened one street away from my house which is much more convenient, but going there would mean not going to the one in town any more. What is one to do!!!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on April 02, 2014, 09:43:08 am
Whatever you do, Morissette - perhaps you should consider some kind of bereavement counselling at this difficult time.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kathy on April 02, 2014, 02:44:15 pm
I couldn't get evening tickets to Grimm Tales in Shoreditch, so I'll have to go to a matinee performance.  :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wascally Weasel on April 02, 2014, 04:00:58 pm
I’ve got some grim tales from Shoreditch I could tell you one evening if that would help?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on April 02, 2014, 06:47:31 pm
My Tesco Finest pizza didn't come with an olive oil drizzler.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on April 03, 2014, 08:23:57 am
Perhaps that was a mercy.  Did you have any basil-infused oil to hand? 
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rabbit on April 03, 2014, 01:48:52 pm
I am trying to 'report from home' but the Sky box keeps saying 'satellite signal not being received' 

How the hell am I supposed to cope? I really don't want to break into my unwatched episodes of 'True Detective' as I am saving them for Saturday night.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: greenmeansgo on April 03, 2014, 06:11:02 pm
A FWP is going to be solved. (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-26868531)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on April 11, 2014, 02:25:29 pm
I've just had my mum on the phone ranting about the fact that she couldn't get tahini in her local Tesco megastore this morning.

Please all spare a thought for her at this time.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: SteveC on April 11, 2014, 02:28:08 pm
My earring rattles against the new style iPhone earbuds when I'm running.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: phantasmagoriana on April 16, 2014, 10:51:08 pm
There was no dark chocolate almond milk in the local Waitrose this evening.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: David Martin on April 16, 2014, 11:00:57 pm
Door opening etiquette: it's easier to hold a door open for somebody when it opens towards you.
Approaching a door that opens away from me, I can see a  woman coming the other way on the other side. I'm going to get there slightly before her. Do I:
a) Try to hold it open with one arm raised and awkwardly stand back as she ducks through while being forced to smell my armpit
b) Stand there like a lemon giving her no option but to hold it open for me, or
c) Just barge through apologising?




Hold the door and be greeted by the phrase - 'thank you, you must be English'. (In the Nationalteatret underground station in Oslo wearing native clothing.)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on April 17, 2014, 01:00:23 pm
After Saturday's tumble I need to replace my bar tape, but I can't get any in Celeste.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Gus on April 19, 2014, 09:23:40 am
After Saturday's tumble I need to replace my bar tape, but I can't get any in Celeste.
http://www.evanscycles.com/products/bianchi/celeste-bar-tape-ec012112 (http://www.evanscycles.com/products/bianchi/celeste-bar-tape-ec012112)

Finally solved one of these problems
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on April 19, 2014, 11:08:13 am
Just dropped my bircher muesli on the floor of Stansted airport.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on April 19, 2014, 11:35:29 am
They had no creme eggs at the shop.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: tiermat on April 19, 2014, 12:02:55 pm
They had no creme eggs at the shop.

They did in our local co-op, yesterday, 3 for a squid.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on April 20, 2014, 11:06:01 pm
Just dropped my bircher muesli on the floor of Stansted airport.

I felt a great disturbance in the Force, as if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror, and were suddenly silenced. I fear something terrible has happened...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on April 20, 2014, 11:18:58 pm
It landed lid side down and when I picked it up, the lid came off and muesli poured out all over the floor. I mopped it up as best I could with a grubby tissue from my bag. It was the most harrowing incident of my life.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on April 20, 2014, 11:47:09 pm
(http://static.guim.co.uk/sys-images/Guardian/Pix/pictures/2014/4/17/1397721160236/Daily-Mirror-front-page-008.jpg)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rr on April 21, 2014, 08:51:49 am
Our dishwasher caught fire last night
I just had to wash some by hand
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on April 21, 2014, 08:54:54 am
Oh rr, that is truly appalling.  You're not alone though sweetie.  We had to call a little man out to ours last week.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kathy on April 21, 2014, 09:02:48 am
Does no-one stock buckwheat flour these days? We can't even find it in Waitrose!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on April 21, 2014, 10:52:52 am
Perhaps those prominent media people can do something about it once they've finished writing about David Cameron's religious statements.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Notsototalnewbie on April 21, 2014, 12:52:24 pm
Oh rr, that is truly appalling.  You're not alone though sweetie.  We had to call a little man out to ours last week.

It took three visits and two different little men to fix ours when it gave up the other week. It was a tough time, I can tell you.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Julian on April 21, 2014, 03:39:05 pm
Ours had only died because we caught a piece of plastic from the organic hummus tub in it, since we wash them before recycling.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on April 21, 2014, 03:41:20 pm
Teh Julian wins teh thread!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on April 21, 2014, 04:23:06 pm
I have no garlic and therefore cannot temper the daal correctly.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on April 21, 2014, 10:53:54 pm
I have no garlic and therefore cannot temper the daal correctly.
How the Daal was Tempered, by Ekksentrika Gallumbovska (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/How_the_Steel_Was_Tempered)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Riggers on April 22, 2014, 05:19:48 pm
Trip to London. Do I leave the shoe-trees in the brogues or not? They add extra weight, but what the hell – there's more than enough room in the car.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on April 22, 2014, 05:32:01 pm
Trip to London. Do I leave the shoe-trees in the brogues or not? They add extra weight, but what the hell – there's more than enough room in the car.
Wait a minute!
There's a car?
Shamelessly stolen from Skully on LFGSS
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ashaman42 on April 22, 2014, 08:30:53 pm
Ok Tesco, I understand the need to stir and recover my microwave ready meal midway through heating. But to do that I really need a film cover that stay vaguely in one piece rather than splitting everywhere I try to peel it back  ::-)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on April 24, 2014, 09:16:33 am
A new Windows 7 update at m workplace has changed the lock screen - instead of pressing Ctrl-Alt-Del and then typing in my password, I now have to press Ctrl-Alt-Del, then press Enter, and then type in my password.

Four years of muscle memory wasted :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on April 24, 2014, 09:25:43 am
We have recently been subjected to a similar indignity - I now need to enter my user name every single time I unlock my computer.

Seven extra characters.  Maybe as many as twenty times a day.  I don't know how we're going to carry on.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: LEE on April 24, 2014, 09:31:25 am
Teh Julian wins teh thread!

Quite.  The mere mention of "Organic", "Tagine" , "Hummus" or "Guildford" can raise a First-World problem to unbearable levels.

Julian scored a Pair (I'm tempted to score it Three-of-a-kind because it's a problem involving a Dish-washer and Organic Hummus).

Let's just hope the breakdown didn't leave her with a soiled Tagine and an impending dinner party..
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hairyhippy on April 25, 2014, 09:55:58 pm
We need a points based system based on  certain key words to grade the severity of the calamitous occurrences contained within the thread.
For example:

Organic 2

Tagine 3

Hummus 2

Guildford 1

Poundstretcher -3

Double word scores for issues including organic and tagine giving a score of 10.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on April 26, 2014, 10:36:10 am
Last nights Kashmiri Butter Chicken, Red Onion & Spinach pizza was missing it's little jar of sauce.....

The cumin infused, hand stretched artisan sourdough base was a little dry as a result....and the chicken was too bland.  I feel disappointed, let down & cheated.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Thor on April 26, 2014, 11:41:52 am
Mrs Thor burned her fingertips taking something out of the oven - and now the fingerprint authentication on her work laptop doesn't recognise her!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on April 26, 2014, 12:40:24 pm
Oh my word, Andrew, Thor.

My heart goes out to you at this tremendously difficult time.

I hope that both of you are getting the help and support that you need from your friends and families.  If there's anything that I can do, you only need to ask...

Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on April 26, 2014, 01:01:09 pm
Thanks for your kind words Charlotte.   I've been trying to take my mind off the incident by doing housework , but the image & texture keep recurring.  The cardboard packaging keeps leering at me from the recycling box, triggering flashbacks everytime it catches my eye.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on April 26, 2014, 03:57:29 pm
YACF force for you both.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Chris S on April 26, 2014, 08:47:12 pm
fboab is in a grump - Tesco do not stock puy lentils.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on April 26, 2014, 08:55:15 pm
Oh yes they do...

 Merchant Gourmet Puy Lentils  (http://www.tesco.com/groceries/product/details/?id=266386187)

Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on April 26, 2014, 09:28:37 pm
Maybe they don't stock them at fboab's branch.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on April 26, 2014, 10:25:41 pm
Sodding Waitrose have failed to meet their agreed delivery slot of some time between 8 and 10 pm today. Quite apart from the inconvenience of hanging around waiting for an unreliable tradesman, I won't have any orange juice with bits in for my breakfast in the morning.

It has just occurred to me: do you think he sought our house and because we don't have a door clearly marked "Tradesman's Entrance" he thought we were too downmarket and therefore couldn't possibly deliver to us? Oh the shame!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on April 26, 2014, 11:25:17 pm
You do know Sainsbury's delivery slots are only one hour, don't you?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: contango on April 28, 2014, 01:11:12 pm
At the wedding I attended last week the free bar only had two beers I particularly liked.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Redlight on April 28, 2014, 01:14:54 pm
Our village Starbucks has closed and been replaced by a dress shop. There are now only eight coffee shops to choose from, and one of them is a Costa
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on April 28, 2014, 01:57:09 pm
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-beds-bucks-herts-27185544 (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-beds-bucks-herts-27185544)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on April 28, 2014, 03:18:44 pm
I have purchased a bath so large that it qualifies as an hydroelectric project which is good because the IMF will need to agree to a loan for the hot water. Fortunately I'm fully submerged when it's just half full. I could probably soap a hippo if it was full. I hope that's not a euphemism.

It's going to be a hard struggle but I'm going to strive to find a suitable bubble bath for my future adventures in cleanliness. Hopefully someone will send me a pleasantly fragranced care package and a nice bottle of wine to help make bath time that bit more bearable.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on April 30, 2014, 02:58:14 pm
Spare a thought today for the poor, beleaguered commuters of London, especially City PA Lilly Morgans, 25, who was reported in yesterday's ES as having had to walk an entire 1.5 miles.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on April 30, 2014, 03:17:06 pm
Oh poor love.  I hope she had the proper safety equipment for an expedition like that.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: red marley on May 01, 2014, 11:03:21 pm
It's going to be a hard struggle but I'm going to strive to find a suitable bubble bath for my future adventures in cleanliness. Hopefully someone will send me a pleasantly fragranced care package and a nice bottle of wine to help make bath time that bit more bearable.

There is only one bubble bath worthy of soaking away those first world problems.

(http://www.mrspharmacy.co.uk/media/catalog/product/cache/2/image/700x/9df78eab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95/b/a/badedas-original-rich-bath-gelee-with-extract-of-horse-chestnut-300ml-10-1oz_1.jpg)

I'm down to my last half bottle. Help!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on May 04, 2014, 08:12:50 pm
The 'noise' from the ice cream van is ruining my enjoyment of the live performance of the London Symphony Orchestra on Radio 3.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on May 04, 2014, 08:17:02 pm
I'll have a 99 please.  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on May 04, 2014, 08:18:22 pm
That's odd, as the noise from the London Symphony Orchestra on Radio 3 is ruining my enjoyment of the live performance from the ice cream van.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on May 04, 2014, 09:47:25 pm
Damn peanuts used for feeding birdies are causing a fly infestation.... strewth.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on May 05, 2014, 05:27:08 pm
Related: first world anarchists (http://www.boredpanda.com/funny-first-world-anarchists-rebels/).

The "Drive Carefully" one is pretty impressive, to be honest.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on May 05, 2014, 07:28:13 pm
The tree is good. And the man "standing on" the bottles.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: pcolbeck on May 07, 2014, 04:55:52 am
My coffee grinder is too noisy. So since I got up at 4:30am and didn’t want to wake the rest of the house I had to make a pot with whatever ground coffee I could find. I 50/50 mix of the last of the Lidl Kenyan and the one year old Illy Espresso I found at the back of the cupboard is interesting. Still it seems to have plenty of caffeine.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: perpetual dan on May 07, 2014, 11:43:19 am
I popped into John Lewes to buy some trousers yesterday and couldn't find any I liked. I'll have to make an appointment with my tailor.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on May 07, 2014, 11:58:57 am
John Lewis didn't have any in red? Shame on them!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on May 07, 2014, 01:40:20 pm
https://twitter.com/crispeater/status/462609612379029505/photo/1
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: trekker12 on May 07, 2014, 04:16:10 pm
It's raining and I commuted in on my best bike this morning - might have to hitch a lift home so it doesn't get wet
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: greenmeansgo on May 07, 2014, 04:58:38 pm
Related: first world anarchists (http://www.boredpanda.com/funny-first-world-anarchists-rebels/).

It's raining and I commuted in on my best bike this morning - might have to hitch a lift home so it doesn't get wet

Awesome, both of you!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on May 09, 2014, 09:42:44 am
I brought a pair of Julian's excellent homemade spinach and feta cheese muffins into work this morning.  When I unwrapped them, to eat for breakfast alongside a cup of single origin Kenyan Kikai pourover, I noticed that they had the smallest amount of mould growing on their surface.

I had to go down to the cafeteria for a Danish pastry instead.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Riggers on May 09, 2014, 10:10:38 am
The problem facing me the other evening, was the strapping on my 'longs' was ever so slightly rumpled/twisted in my shoe, causing me a little discomfort when out for a blast before tea. I could have dealt with it, but that would have interrupted my ride by a couple of minutes. I decided to 'bank' those minutes to help me get back in time to put the oven on before my wife returned from her zumba class.


Needless to say, I didn't make it back in time. I think my bike's getting slower.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Moultonaught on May 09, 2014, 10:16:47 am
Wanted, no needed, a cup of tea for the train journey into London but had no cash for the station café. Thankfully as a 'known face' I was allowed to take now and pay later and not have the horror of a 45 minute train journey without tea...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: tiermat on May 10, 2014, 01:58:29 pm
After 10 hard years labour, our dishwasher has given up the ghost. That is not the greatest horror, though. I will need to find a pair of Marigolds, so i can do the washing up, but nowhere stocks them big enough for my shovel hands! I have no option, therefore, but to either wash up ala commando, or suffer with aching hands from gloves that are too small.

What is a man to do?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on May 10, 2014, 02:15:34 pm
Would a car spares place sell anything suitable?
Can you use nitrile gloves?
Something like this from Lakeland? http://www.lakeland.co.uk/21180/Large-Deluxe-Moisturising-Gloves-Size-9 (http://www.lakeland.co.uk/21180/Large-Deluxe-Moisturising-Gloves-Size-9)

I wash up commando anyway...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Julian on May 10, 2014, 02:16:14 pm
Wash up commando.  With suitable organic, hypo-allegergenic, eco-friendly washing up liquid you shouldn't need Marigolds.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on May 10, 2014, 02:20:24 pm
Wash up commando.  With suitable organic, hypo-allegergenic, eco-friendly washing up liquid you shouldn't need Marigolds.
If you can get your hands into the water without Marigolds, the water isn't hot enough.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: tiermat on May 10, 2014, 02:33:22 pm
Wash up commando.  With suitable organic, hypo-allegergenic, eco-friendly washing up liquid you shouldn't need Marigolds.
If you can get your hands into the water without Marigolds, the water isn't hot enough.

Not quite true.

For most people that is the case, but, as people on this forum will testify, I have a) asbestos hands and b) a higher than normal pain threshold...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: perpetual dan on May 10, 2014, 02:43:22 pm
In the absence of someone called Marigold to do the dishes, how about
(http://s7g3.scene7.com/is/image/ae235?$p$&layer=0&size=281,281&layer=1&size=281,281&src=ae235/65662_P)
http://www.screwfix.com/p/marigold-emperor-chemical-hazard-17-gauntlets-black-large/65662# (http://www.screwfix.com/p/marigold-emperor-chemical-hazard-17-gauntlets-black-large/65662#)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: jogler on May 10, 2014, 03:15:24 pm
What is a man to do?

paper plates & cups.
plastic cutlery
all disposable.
 8)

hth
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on May 10, 2014, 03:31:47 pm
Wash up commando.  With suitable organic, hypo-allegergenic, eco-friendly washing up liquid you shouldn't need Marigolds.
If you can get your hands into the water without Marigolds, the water isn't hot enough.

Not quite true.

For most people that is the case, but, as people on this forum will testify, I have a) asbestos hands and b) a higher than normal pain threshold...

I think this statement is technique-dependent.
I apply detergent with a warm scourer and scrub if necessary. The dishes then get rinsed in very hot water, which seldom touches my paws.
I don't leave my dishes wallowing in tepid soapy water and drain them unrinsed.  :sick:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: orienteer on May 10, 2014, 04:44:55 pm
Mrs O, Japanese, has always been horrified by the apparently common English habit of not rinsing crockery and cutlery. (Lemon flavoured washing up liquid?  :facepalm:).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on May 10, 2014, 05:04:41 pm
Wash up commando.  With suitable organic, hypo-allegergenic, eco-friendly washing up liquid you shouldn't need Marigolds.
If you can get your hands into the water without Marigolds, the water isn't hot enough.

Not quite true.

For most people that is the case, but, as people on this forum will testify, I have a) asbestos hands and b) a higher than normal pain threshold...

I think this statement is technique-dependent.
I apply detergent with a warm scourer and scrub if necessary. The dishes then get rinsed in very hot water, which seldom touches my paws.
I don't leave my dishes wallowing in tepid soapy water and drain them unrinsed.  :sick:
I run very hot water into the washing-up bowl with Fairy in it, sloosh it around to make bubbles, wash the glasses and rinse them with the water as it runs, then wash everything else in the hot soapy water, in this order: mugs, bowls, plates, cutlery, pans and stack them on the drainer so the water runs off them and they dry.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on May 10, 2014, 06:00:48 pm
Mrs O, Japanese, has always been horrified by the apparently common English habit of not rinsing crockery and cutlery. (Lemon flavoured washing up liquid?  :facepalm:).

Likewise my Danish Mum!
Mum learned to wash up from her mother, who had to get instructions from a book borrowed from a public library after they fled Germany.
Prior to that, the maid had always washed the dishes so my grandmother knew not what to do.
[First world problem from a bygone era] 
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: perpetual dan on May 10, 2014, 06:06:06 pm
Something similar to Helly, although I do change the water sometimes as the thought of cross contamination between, say, hummus and port, makes me come over quite peculiar.  :)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: phantasmagoriana on May 10, 2014, 07:27:23 pm
I keep the water running as I wash up. It's terribly wasteful, but it's just the way I've always done it. :facepalm:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ashaman42 on May 10, 2014, 08:35:31 pm
I run the water into the bowl of plates whilst I'm washing and rinsing the glasses. Then kill the water and just flush the plates with the bowl water. Can't say I've ever noticed soapy tasting plates but then I don't have very bubbly water.

I also wash up in order of dirty/greasiness changing the washing up water if needed.

Probably not the best approach but seems to work.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: barakta on May 11, 2014, 03:03:49 pm
Assuming freshly dirtied dishes then mostly Helly's method although we use running hot water and annoyingly our kitchen sink hot tap is FULL-on, stuttering or off which I *hate* but we can't fix without epic amounts of kitchen remodelling which isn't allowed or worth it in rented house.

If dried on dishes then washing up liquid in sink + dishes and hot water. Soak for 5-10 mins, then scrub dishes till most stuff has come off. Empty sink and stack part washed plates if poss to one side and rinse in bloody hot clean running water.

I don't usually bother with gloves and find bog standard fairy used sparingly as needed works well.  Don't believe in sodding bowls either and have taken to hiding the one at work people use for dumping their stuff unwashed (grrr) so they can't do that so much...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on May 12, 2014, 09:31:36 am
Rinse under tap, open door, place dirty things on shelves and press button.......... ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: jogler on May 12, 2014, 10:42:31 am
Rinse under tap, open door, place dirty things on shelves and press button.......... ;D

+1
 :thumbsup:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ads on May 12, 2014, 06:56:06 pm
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/personalfinance/10812086/I-make-120000-but-I-cant-recall-the-last-time-we-went-out-for-dinner.html
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: CrinklyLion on May 12, 2014, 07:22:05 pm
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/personalfinance/10812086/I-make-120000-but-I-cant-recall-the-last-time-we-went-out-for-dinner.html

Quote
The boys are flexi-boarders, so they stay at school on various nights of the week,” says Jackson. “Annually it’s costing £45,000 after tax, which is a considerable outlay, but I’m happy to pay because I want them to have the best start.
Fuck me.  That's 4 times my annual salary.  Gross.

Quote
Jackson’s tone is matter-of-fact. Like the rest of the Squeezed Middle, he is keenly aware that his situation evokes little sympathy. “I know if I were to have a conversation with someone on a council estate, they would think I was mad,” says Jackson, wryly.
Erm... not just on council estates. 
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: CommuteTooFar on May 12, 2014, 10:29:45 pm
In the olden days if I searched for my name (with Alta-Vista) I would find myself in the first few entries.  I googled myself and I did not appear until page thirteen.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on May 13, 2014, 10:41:46 am
In the olden days if I searched for my name (with Alta-Vista) I would find myself in the first few entries.  I googled myself and I did not appear until page thirteen.
I just googled "CommuteTooFar" and you filled the first page.

https://www.google.co.uk/webhp?sourceid=chrome-instant&ion=1&espv=2&ie=UTF-8#nfpr=1&q=commutetoofar refers.

You clearly are not doing it right.

Incidentally, congratulations on your first place!

http://omgili.com/thread/FYJ2xGwtw8Fbj1YZkBjL0Uii.P_CBAXUfAYOBCWVOoM8beIdWQjvnoC43P3AvSDlqrUbv7qzBPY-/

 :thumbsup:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on May 13, 2014, 06:33:13 pm
The supermarket had no cocktail sticks  :o   How am I going to make sure that my free range, juniper smoked bacon stays neatly wrapped around my organic asparus spears, whilst they are under the grill  ???
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on May 13, 2014, 06:34:25 pm
The supermarket had no cocktail sticks  :o   How am I going to make sure that my free range, juniper smoked bacon stays neatly wrapped around my organic asparus spears, whilst they are under the grill  ???

Boots.  Toothpicks.
Btdt
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: SteveC on May 13, 2014, 06:55:34 pm
Sprigs of your own. home grown, organic rosemary?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: phantasmagoriana on May 13, 2014, 07:08:30 pm
I had a spoke replaced at the LBS. My Velox rim tape has been replaced by ugly red stuff!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wombat on May 14, 2014, 08:27:31 am
I had a spoke replaced at the LBS. My Velox rim tape has been replaced by ugly red stuff!

That isn't a first world problem, thats a hanging offence.  There is ony one true rim tape...  In the beginning there was the word, and the word was Velox.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: davelodwig on May 14, 2014, 10:33:29 am
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/personalfinance/10812086/I-make-120000-but-I-cant-recall-the-last-time-we-went-out-for-dinner.html

Quote
The boys are flexi-boarders, so they stay at school on various nights of the week,” says Jackson. “Annually it’s costing £45,000 after tax, which is a considerable outlay, but I’m happy to pay because I want them to have the best start.
Fuck me.  That's 4 times my annual salary.  Gross.

Quote
Jackson’s tone is matter-of-fact. Like the rest of the Squeezed Middle, he is keenly aware that his situation evokes little sympathy. “I know if I were to have a conversation with someone on a council estate, they would think I was mad,” says Jackson, wryly.
Erm... not just on council estates.

Not so much the squeezed middle as the stupid middle, and to be honest with that salary he's not the middle either.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mrcharly-YHT on May 15, 2014, 10:57:55 am
Last night I had to book a table at Pizza Express. 5min on the phone, working my way through the most hideous automated booking system on earth. After I'd ranted about how crap it was for 10 min, my wife pointed out I could have booked via a web page with 3 clicks.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on May 15, 2014, 11:38:14 am
Last night I had to book a table at Pizza Express. 5min on the phone, working my way through the most hideous automated booking system on earth. After I'd ranted about how crap it was for 10 min, my wife pointed out I could have booked via a web page with 3 clicks.

There's also 'an app for that' :)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on May 15, 2014, 12:03:40 pm
My cats will only eat premium 'vet-approved' cat food. I fear that I too may be part of the squeezed middle.

Will I be OK if I eat 'essentials' blueberries rather than the premium ones?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: peliroja on May 15, 2014, 12:45:27 pm
Feeling extra stressed because I can't get the little bit of plastic wrapping off the top of my bottle of Bach Rescue Remedy.  :-[
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mrcharly-YHT on May 15, 2014, 01:59:20 pm
Feeling extra stressed because I can't get the little bit of plastic wrapping off the top of my bottle of Bach Rescue Remedy.  :-[
Bach Rescue Remedy; letting people drink brandy for medicinal purposes since 1930.  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on May 15, 2014, 04:05:33 pm
Perhaps you need to keep a little bottle of Rescue Remedy handy for the times when you get stressed getting the top off new bottles of Rescue Remedy?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on May 15, 2014, 09:57:18 pm
Oh, for goodness' sake, IKEA!  Why have you stopped selling the triangular version of the LACK table?  No demand, you say?  Well, I'm demanding one, me laddo, so get over to Sweden and get sawing.

And then, to add insult to injury, the display on my motorcar's stereophonic system stopped working.

Oh.  Polaroid sunglasses, you say?  As you were...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on May 15, 2014, 10:04:44 pm
Ikea have also stopped doing their Grundtal hanging spice rack, and people are selling them for extortionate amounts on ebay.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on May 15, 2014, 10:13:48 pm
They've also upset all the LP fans by withdrawing the Expedit shelving system.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Julian on May 15, 2014, 10:23:02 pm
Amazon.co.uk's website was very briefly down.  I was worried I might not make the Saturday delivery time.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on May 15, 2014, 10:26:35 pm
Amazon.co.uk's website was very briefly down.

...for tax reasons?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on May 18, 2014, 10:19:54 am
Yesterday Dr Larrington was supposed to be going to Glyndebourne to see Der Rosenkavalier.  I say "supposed", as when I spoke to her on Friday she simply couldn't find any quails' eggs to accompany her champagne and caviar, in spite of scouring the whole of Chipping Norton.  I suspect she may have cancelled the entire excursion...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on May 20, 2014, 02:36:02 pm
http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/27484318

Quote
City gave Toure a birthday cake as they flew to Abu Dhabi and tweeted their congratulations after he turned 31.

But Dimitri Seluk says Toure is "very upset" the club's owners failed to acknowledge him personally and says he may leave over their lack of respect.

"None of them shook his hand on his birthday. It's really sick," he said.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Lady Cavendish on May 27, 2014, 08:58:39 am
Just broke an acrylic nail while doing my ocado shop
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on May 30, 2014, 08:22:34 pm
I was half-way through cooking the pasta before I realised that I had used the last of the chilli pesto. I've had to use the emergency backup coriander pesto instead.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pickled Onion on June 02, 2014, 12:20:45 pm
The AV amp stopped working yesterday, we had to watch a whole film with sound through the TV's built in speakers. It was truly horrible.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rabbit on June 02, 2014, 04:31:55 pm
The only place I could get a caffeine fix today was a Tesco Costa  :sick:

Comparing Costa to nice coffee is like comparing methadone to heroin
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on June 02, 2014, 08:39:34 pm
When I went out for dinner on Saturday with the Wowbaggers, I struggled to pick a dessert because the two things I wanted were flourless chocolate cake with beetroot sorbet, but I don't like beetroot, or poached pear in a brandysnap basket with apple sorbet and green tea syrup, but I don't like tea.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on June 02, 2014, 08:56:41 pm
M&S food hall had no English lamb*,  I had to buy imported stuff   :o   I used the self service checkout so no one else would see..

* at least not on the reduced shelf..



Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on June 02, 2014, 09:29:28 pm
I try to buy Welsh lamb when I can, on the grounds that the mountain sheep are sweeter, but the valley sheep are fatter. We therefore deemed it meeter to carry off the latter.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on June 03, 2014, 11:56:54 am
When I went out for dinner on Saturday with the Wowbaggers, I struggled to pick a dessert because the two things I wanted were flourless chocolate cake with beetroot sorbet, but I don't like beetroot, or poached pear in a brandysnap basket with apple sorbet and green tea syrup, but I don't like tea.

So much tragedy in this thread at the moment.  My heart is heavy for all of your who are  suffering.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Blazer on June 08, 2014, 12:14:13 pm
The free coffee machine in Waitrtose near the checkout was broken.  Would have to walk to the second machine by the bread isle to collect my free latte.  It was asking for a filter change earlier in the week so guess no-one got to it in time.

 Hope it's fixed for tomorrow lunch time.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on June 08, 2014, 12:53:31 pm
I'm working.   
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on June 08, 2014, 04:21:19 pm
Hmm.  Spag bol tonight and I've run out of plonk.  I'm going to have to use one of my decent Malbecs as an ingredient as I can't be added to cycle to the shop.
Half a glass as ingredient, two glasses for the chef during the cooking process, I'm going to have to open another bottle for dinner, aren't I?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pickled Onion on June 08, 2014, 04:46:32 pm
The AV amp stopped working yesterday, we had to watch a whole film with sound through the TV's built in speakers. It was truly horrible.

The man in the shop insisted on lending us an ex-display amp while it's away being mended - it might take two or three weeks, and it was unthinkable for someone to have to listen to tinny TV speakers for that length of time.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on June 10, 2014, 09:55:51 pm
The AV amp stopped working yesterday, we had to watch a whole film with sound through the TV's built in speakers. It was truly horrible.

The man in the shop insisted on lending us an ex-display amp while it's away being mended - it might take two or three weeks, and it was unthinkable for someone to have to listen to tinny TV speakers for that length of time.

What a nice man!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on June 11, 2014, 05:34:07 am
The AV amp stopped working yesterday, we had to watch a whole film with sound through the TV's built in speakers. It was truly horrible.

The man in the shop insisted on lending us an ex-display amp while it's away being mended - it might take two or three weeks, and it was unthinkable for someone to have to listen to tinny TV speakers for that length of time.

My faith in humanity is restored
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tom M on June 11, 2014, 11:53:15 am
Technicians currently dismantling a piece of equipment in the room I sometimes like to wander off to for a sneaky snooze. Where am I supposed to go for my nap after a hard morning of drinking coffee and procrastinating?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on June 11, 2014, 12:05:19 pm
Up to the roof where possible is traditional.  In theatres, the drape store is the comfortable option.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on June 14, 2014, 11:39:37 am
My order of coffee beans from HasBean hasn't arrived in the post.   I'm having to use beans that were roasted _months_ ago  :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruth on June 14, 2014, 11:49:00 am
My son used my cake slice to flip his Taste The Difference Burger  >:(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on June 15, 2014, 03:48:03 pm
My poached eggs were sub optimal because they weren't runny enough.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on June 15, 2014, 05:30:07 pm
My parents don't have enough freezer space for me to order them a bag of ice from Sainsbury's online store of toothy comestibles.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on June 15, 2014, 07:01:16 pm
It was too cold for an ice cream, so I had to order a slice of cake instead.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on June 16, 2014, 12:48:11 pm
The knives here aren't very good and whenever I get myself a slice of cake, it squashes down instead of slicing.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on June 16, 2014, 01:44:45 pm
There wasn't enough milk for cereals this morning so I had to have toast.
There wasn't any Rose's lemon and lime marmalade, so I had to have supermarket own-brand strawberry jam.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: jogler on June 16, 2014, 02:27:54 pm
There wasn't enough milk for cereals this morning so I had to have toast.
There wasn't any Rose's lemon and lime marmalade, so I had to have supermarket own-brand strawberry jam.

We've got plenty here 'cause I picked up the wrong jar.I wanted Ginger marmalade.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on June 16, 2014, 02:31:47 pm
There wasn't enough milk for cereals this morning so I had to have toast.
There wasn't any Rose's lemon and lime marmalade, so I had to have supermarket own-brand strawberry jam.

We've got plenty here 'cause I picked up the wrong jar.I wanted Ginger marmalade.

We have a couple of spare jars of Rose's too.
They were on Special Offer and then I stopped eating toast & preserves, in an effort to Lose Weight.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on June 17, 2014, 08:36:01 pm
I have had no postal deliveries the last couple of days; I was expecting to receive a Graze box and a couple of opera tickets.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Euan Uzami on June 17, 2014, 08:48:44 pm
Absolute DISASTER that Waitrose have stopped selling Simply Sausages and I will now have to settle for Heck's.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on June 18, 2014, 12:13:30 pm
The Graze box has arrived but the opera tickets seem to have gone AWOL. Time to phone the Coliseum...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on June 18, 2014, 12:56:15 pm
Phoned up the Coliseum. THEY ONLY SEND OUT TICKETS BY SECOND CLASS POST!

WTF ???
Opera tickets aren't cheap and I paid a booking fee too.
SECOND CLASS!?!
Cheapskates, honestly!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ham on June 18, 2014, 07:56:52 pm
I have just had to substitute marc for kirsch making a clafoutis. Shocking.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on June 18, 2014, 10:26:41 pm
It was too cold for an ice cream, so I had to order a slice of cake instead.

Do you live at the South Pole? It's never too cold for an ice cream.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Deano on June 18, 2014, 10:43:02 pm
It was too cold for an ice cream, so I had to order a slice of cake instead.

Do you live at the South Pole? It's never too cold for an ice cream.

Indeed. Best ice cream I ever had was wandering through Tabriz on a cold December evening while wearing all of my clothes.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on June 19, 2014, 02:48:32 pm
Fourteen problems solved (http://weknowmemes.com/2014/06/14-clever-ways-to-solve-everyday-problems/).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on June 19, 2014, 07:43:42 pm
It was too cold for an ice cream, so I had to order a slice of cake instead.

Do you live at the South Pole? It's never too cold for an ice cream.

Civilisation depends on the clear demarcation of the two grand seasons: the Time of Ice Cream and the Time of Cake. Woe to those who eat baked alaska any time other than the solstice days, whereupon the ceremonial consumption marks the great transformation.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: asterix on June 19, 2014, 08:27:42 pm
Proves civilisation is overrated. Who needs it if it's going to be like that?  Apostasy rules! OK!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on June 19, 2014, 10:35:19 pm
I drizzled too much basil infused olive oil on my sliced tomatoes, it pooled on the plate.   I managed to drop a slice of tomato into the pool.    I am now anointed with fragrant oil.... :facepalm:     

Luckily I wasn't wearing a shirt....
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rafletcher on June 20, 2014, 10:58:55 am
I chose Ice Grey metallic for my new car from the "configurator". Yet when, 3 days later, I went to place the order, I found it had been discontinued, and I had to change to Tornado Grey metallic. Worse still, it'll be ready mid-August, so I'll have to wait another 2 weeks to pick it up in order to get the 64 registration.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruth on June 20, 2014, 07:46:44 pm
I am now anointed with fragrant oil....

Oh, my!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on June 20, 2014, 08:23:20 pm
My car works  >:( >:( >:( >:( >:(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on June 20, 2014, 08:52:49 pm
I drizzled too much basil infused olive oil on my sliced tomatoes, it pooled on the plate.   I managed to drop a slice of tomato into the pool.    I am now anointed with fragrant oil.... :facepalm:     

Luckily I wasn't wearing a shirt....

I always eat naked too. As I explain to guests, I'm wipe clean but my shirts are not.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on June 20, 2014, 09:17:43 pm
I drizzled too much basil infused olive oil on my sliced tomatoes, it pooled on the plate.   I managed to drop a slice of tomato into the pool.    I am now anointed with fragrant oil.... :facepalm:     

Luckily I wasn't wearing a shirt....

I always eat naked too. As I explain to guests, I'm wipe clean but my shirts are not.

Oiled, naked & smelling of Basil........    there's a mental image for you....    :o
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on June 20, 2014, 09:23:38 pm
Last time I smelled of Basil he had just wiped his lurgy glove over my hand. I was ill for a fortnight.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on June 20, 2014, 09:42:53 pm
I'm now in the pub, wearing shorts. Their dog keeps licking my legs..... I must taste of something nice....
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mcshroom on June 22, 2014, 06:13:30 pm
I just had to fill in my details twice to order a ticket at Raby Castle, as the first time through Adblock wouldn't let the Online payment system open up. And the autocorrect insisted on me typing in each box instead of filling the boxes automatically.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on June 23, 2014, 12:45:37 pm
Bobb and I have just had to pay an additional £56 between us for the privilege of sharing a double bed when we go to Mykonos in 67 sleeps.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kathy on June 23, 2014, 12:51:05 pm
A mouse has been removing the contents of the food cupboard and relocating them to various nesting points around the house.

As a result, my yoga mat is full of lentils.  :-[ :facepalm:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on June 23, 2014, 12:52:56 pm
Oh dear, I do hope they're organic. You wouldn't want pesticide-ridden pulses in your yoga mat!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: orienteer on June 23, 2014, 02:49:06 pm
Each summer I treat myself to scones, Wilkin and Sons Little Scarlet strawberry jam, and Cornish clotted cream.

First the scones run out, so I have to buy more to use up the cream. Then the cream, so I have to buy more to finish the scones. Then the jam.... and so the endless cycle goes on and on.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Auntie Helen on June 24, 2014, 05:58:54 am
I need to buy some scones to take back to Germany on Sunday (with the Little Scarlet and clotted cream of course). Do you have a recommended Scone supplier?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on June 24, 2014, 10:11:08 am
Mostly in Scotland, I believe. You could contact the Old Stables Tea Room at Paper Mill Lock and see if they could prepare a batch for you. Am I right in thinking that Little Scarlet it a flavour of Wilkins Jam? Good scones deserve nothing less than jam from Tiptree, although again some of the Dundee confections pass muster.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on June 24, 2014, 10:44:53 am
The artisan baker in town was closed when I went past this morning :( will have to settle for biscuits instead of a pastry with my coffee this morning.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ham on June 24, 2014, 01:26:04 pm
The artisan baker in town was closed when I went past this morning :( will have to settle for biscuits instead of a pastry with my coffee this morning.

 You have an artisan biker? Oh..... <Books appointment with optician>
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on June 24, 2014, 08:58:18 pm
The Sainsburys man burst my tub of buttermilk so I won't be getting any freshly made scones this weekend ;(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: orienteer on June 24, 2014, 10:53:21 pm
I need to buy some scones to take back to Germany on Sunday (with the Little Scarlet and clotted cream of course). Do you have a recommended Scone supplier?

If I can't persuade Mrs O to make some, then I have to make do with Waitrose's best.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruth on June 29, 2014, 05:51:40 pm
My M+S crayfish salad with edamame beans and noodles was disappointingly bland.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on June 29, 2014, 06:16:23 pm
My mother and I went to the Royal Academy last Monday to see the Summer Exhibition.
It was CLOSED for the day so we had to go to Fortnum & Mason.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Regulator on June 29, 2014, 06:24:31 pm
I need to buy some scones to take back to Germany on Sunday (with the Little Scarlet and clotted cream of course). Do you have a recommended Scone supplier?


My mother makes the best scones.... her cheese scones are to die for, and are best eaten warm from oven slathered with butter.

You may have a heart attack - but you'll die happy!  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on June 30, 2014, 02:36:33 am
My mother and I went to the Royal Academy last Monday to see the Summer Exhibition.
It was CLOSED for the day so we had to go to Fortnum & Mason.

Substitute "the Carlsberg brewery" and "the Tivoli Gardens" and you have my day in Copenhagen in 1993 ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on June 30, 2014, 08:45:06 pm
Sat on the M25 for 2.5 hours on Friday evening last whilst attempting to travel the few miles around to the M3, the thought occurred to me upon gazing at the 8 lanes of static machinery (or is it 10?) with countless thousands of vehicles in both directions, do we not comprehend how barking mad this really is?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on July 01, 2014, 12:54:24 am
My mother and I went to the Royal Academy last Monday to see the Summer Exhibition.
It was CLOSED for the day so we had to go to Fortnum & Mason.

Substitute "the Carlsberg brewery" and "the Tivoli Gardens" and you have my day in Copenhagen in 1993 ;D

Having grandparents in Copenhagen made Tivoli a fairly frequent treat.

They lived here http://goo.gl/maps/hwxQq (http://goo.gl/maps/hwxQq)

I 'did' the Tuborg brewery with my Late Uncle Robert when I was about 10... We drank fizzypop but Robert (Bier) had the BEER.
More nominative determination...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Gattopardo on July 01, 2014, 03:11:03 am
Sat on the M25 for 2.5 hours on Friday evening last whilst attempting to travel the few miles around to the M3, the thought occurred to me upon gazing at the 8 lanes of static machinery (or is it 10?) with countless thousands of vehicles in both directions, do we not comprehend how barking mad this really is?

Good evening Lemmings....

(http://static.fjcdn.com/pictures/The+sad+truth_1c188a_3956554.jpg)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on July 01, 2014, 06:47:00 am
Sat on the M25 for 2.5 hours on Friday evening last whilst attempting to travel the few miles around to the M3, the thought occurred to me upon gazing at the 8 lanes of static machinery (or is it 10?) with countless thousands of vehicles in both directions, do we not comprehend how barking mad this really is?

Clearly you did not.    :demon:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on July 01, 2014, 08:24:29 am
Sat on the M25 for 2.5 hours on Friday evening last whilst attempting to travel the few miles around to the M3, the thought occurred to me upon gazing at the 8 lanes of static machinery (or is it 10?) with countless thousands of vehicles in both directions, do we not comprehend how barking mad this really is?

I regularly get a taxi to Heathrow via the M25. I have been playing a pointless game where I see how single occupancy cars I can count before I spot one with a passenger. Motorbikes and lorries don't count. Last week I hit 82.

Mind you, I'd just back from the 5,500 mile flight. I should buy a bigger car.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Auntie Helen on July 01, 2014, 10:37:50 am
The turmeric I put in with my rice has stained my wooden spoon yellow. It now doesn't match the other wooden serving implements.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on July 01, 2014, 05:36:04 pm
Waitrose! Will you please put a huge warning sign on any product of Israel so that I can more easily boycott it? I had assumed, naively, that the samphire I bought to go with the salmon steaks was locally produced.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on July 01, 2014, 09:14:34 pm
The turmeric I put in with my rice has stained my wooden spoon yellow. It now doesn't match the other wooden serving implements.

Buy a chocolate fountain?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on July 01, 2014, 09:44:23 pm
The turmeric I put in with my rice has stained my wooden spoon yellow. It now doesn't match the other wooden serving implements.

Buy a chocolate fountain?
Make more rice with turmeric, using different implements, until they are all the same colour again.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: nicknack on July 03, 2014, 09:29:02 am
Our local branch of Morrisons has stopped stocking their Signature Series Normandy butter so I've had to go to T***o. I don't think I was spotted, though.
It would be so much easier if they built a Waitrose somewhere close by.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on July 03, 2014, 02:21:16 pm
Tokyo? I didn't think the Japanese were all that good with dairy stuff.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: phantasmagoriana on July 24, 2014, 06:46:09 pm
Just noticed I've dropped from platinum to gold Wiggle discount. I placed an order the other day, too! :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on July 24, 2014, 07:42:15 pm
You obviously need to buy MOAR Things.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on July 24, 2014, 09:33:08 pm
Our local branch of Morrisons has stopped stocking their Signature Series Normandy butter so I've had to go to T***o. I don't think I was spotted, though.
It would be so much easier if they built a Waitrose somewhere close by.
I believe there are branches in Ramsgate and Canterbury  :P
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on August 01, 2014, 11:41:08 am
http://youtu.be/bwvlbJ0h35A
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mrcharly-YHT on August 01, 2014, 12:33:29 pm
http://youtu.be/bwvlbJ0h35A
:D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: jogler on August 01, 2014, 01:14:32 pm
There is no milk in the fridge
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on August 02, 2014, 10:32:53 am
I cannot read the display on my iPod when it's connected to the hi-fi, as it's too far away.  And I doubt my binoculars will be any use at that range :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on August 02, 2014, 01:30:03 pm
I cannot read the display on my iPod when it's connected to the hi-fi, as it's too far away.  And I doubt my binoculars will be any use at that range :(
What would happen if you taped your reading specs to the far end of your binoculars?
Only asking, mind...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Oaky on September 19, 2014, 07:45:15 am
I got upgraded to business class on my flight (again) and spilled port on my t-shirt when I nodded off in my horizontal bed position (again).   :facepalm:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: geraldc on September 19, 2014, 08:44:23 am
We just got given a vitamix but now the other half wants a thermomix
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rafletcher on September 19, 2014, 08:47:19 am
We just got given a vitamix but now the other half wants a thermomix

A cook might be cheaper.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: pcolbeck on September 19, 2014, 08:55:22 am
Being really upset at loosing a completely democratic independence vote and claiming that you are oppressed after a campaign that didn’t involve petrol bombs, riots, the army on the street or any kind of murder and after which no matter which way it went there would be no "disappearance" of political rivals or arrest of those working for the losing campaign.

Yes I have been reading the bottom half of the newspaper comments pages.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on September 19, 2014, 02:00:10 pm
Anyone want to hang my washing outside? Socks, I hate hanging them up.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on September 19, 2014, 02:42:00 pm
Anyone want to hang my washing outside? Socks, I hate hanging them up.

Won't they get wet?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on September 19, 2014, 03:12:10 pm
Anyone want to hang my washing outside? Socks, I hate hanging them up.

Won't they get wet?
Believe it not, it's not actually raining outside. Though it is a bit meh and not drying out so I've hung up in the wash hoose.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on September 19, 2014, 09:13:56 pm
Sainbury's appear to have done away with my preferred varietal of chocolate for the second time, and all I have in the house is something poorly second best.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rogerzilla on September 19, 2014, 10:18:20 pm
One of my two new leather sofas came without the right bolts for the feet and DFS had to temporarily fit slightly shorter feet.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: geraldc on September 22, 2014, 09:32:44 am
http://vegadventure.weebly.com/

British Airways started using the above website as promotion, and releasing press releases linking back to the blog. Basically some "random" guy decides to fly some pointless convoluted route for 45 hrs to get Gold Status. Gold status means you get to use the first class lounge and hammer the free booze. On the blog he shows his Gold Status card which is valid for 2 years. For most people, Gold statuses have to renew from year to year, and BA are normally very strict, miss the quota, and you lose your status. So some "freeloader" getting a guaranteed 2 years has upset quite a few business travellers.

There are more than a few PAs being told to draft angry emails to BA right now to complain about the inequity in the system right now.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on September 22, 2014, 10:14:42 am
http://vegadventure.weebly.com/

British Airways started using the above website as promotion, and releasing press releases linking back to the blog. Basically some "random" guy decides to fly some pointless convoluted route for 45 hrs to get Gold Status. Gold status means you get to use the first class lounge and hammer the free booze. On the blog he shows his Gold Status card which is valid for 2 years. For most people, Gold statuses have to renew from year to year, and BA are normally very strict, miss the quota, and you lose your status. So some "freeloader" getting a guaranteed 2 years has upset quite a few business travellers.

There are more than a few PAs being told to draft angry emails to BA right now to complain about the inequity in the system right now.

The entire pecking order of the Flying Class system always amuses me. Those chubby little businessmen with their cards clutched in sweaty palms. Their rush for priority boarding is probably the fastest they ever move without the benefit of a golf cart. They'd probably complain if the plane crashed and they weren't the first to hit the ground. I have them all categorised from the power-suited alpha-women bosses to the teenage trustees to the vanilla escapees from the usual economy class doldrums (like moi).

I'll confess though, the lounges are nicer than schlepping with hoi polloi in the free-range departure zoo, and the beds are better than the torture chairs they put in economy. I've sworn for a long time now that airlines put a lot of a time and effort into making economy worse just so first/business looks better. Come on, why else do you think you're waiting in a long, infinitely pointless queue staring at the 'fast track for first class ticket holders' sign? Ryanair? You don't think that was invented by a cartel of airline CEOs? They even gave it a comedy villain boss.

Many years ago I first got gold on USAir (it might have been AA) and the only palpable benefit of that was the cabin crew scowled slightly less. On US airlines it's always called something like Super Diplomat Envoy class, presumably because Americans don't have a class system and they're such exemplary diplomats.

Some places have a special lounge to keep proper First Class free from the off-the-peg salarymen that have scrambled into business class. Last year, travelling on a business ticket, I took the wrong corridor from the lounge reception to frantic cries of 'sir, sir, SIR!' I'll confess I ran and hid in the first class lounge toilet until it was safe for to come out and get cracking on the champagne. Eating from a buffet is so proletarian. They have table-service in First and everyone calls you 'sir.' It's a world where a Viscount isn't just a biscuit.

I would have been back on BA Gold but my boss did this year's tour of the far-east as I was on holiday, which is where I usually net all my tier points on business flights, so I languish in the netherlands of silver.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: pcolbeck on September 22, 2014, 10:21:16 am
I'm pretty sure when I was doing some work for the CAA at Gatwick one of the check in desks said "upper class". I wondered if you had to show a documented ancestry going back to some Norman chancer to use it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: geraldc on September 22, 2014, 10:43:04 am
There's BA lounge inflation. Business Class, has the business class lounge. The first class lounge is used by solely by Business class flyers with Gold Status. First class flyers have their own Concorde lounge.

Virgin have the upper class. Which is funny as Branson always seemed quite egalitarian to me, but I guess owning an island will turn you into a Bond villain whether you like it or not.

Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on September 22, 2014, 01:50:34 pm
Oh, it's rumoured there's a lounge for those elevated above and beyond the usual choirs of traveller. Those of God-like status like Bono and Tony Blair hang out there being served canapes by supermodels while bathing in warmed Bollinger. The only way in is through a hidden door in terminal 5. I could tell you where it is, but then I'd have to kill you.

Sadly, I can only wangle business class these days for intercontinental flights longer than seven hours (the US east coast is excluded) and even then as the budget holder I'm aware of the finite nature of our travel funds. I often remind our sales droids, who always get giddy when they find they're allowed to upgrade, of the caveat 'with manager approval.' I'm not sure this does much for my popularity. I used to upgrade with my miles but my wife has discovered they pay for the holiday flights. In all honesty, it's very bad value for money (other than for the bed if it's an overnighter) and, of course, the status. Plus, you get access to the inflight control systems. From the comfort of your fully horizontal bed, select an economy class seat and activate the discomfort feature. Hours of fun making them squirm as you move the sticky-out bit around the seat back. Activate the crying baby in 55E? Oh yes.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Peter on September 22, 2014, 02:04:43 pm
I'm pretty sure when I was doing some work for the CAA at Gatwick one of the check in desks said "upper class". I wondered if you had to show a documented ancestry going back to some Norman chancer to use it.

Probably for RyanAir - you get to sit on the roof.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on September 22, 2014, 03:56:04 pm
Some places have a special lounge to keep proper First Class free from the off-the-peg salarymen that have scrambled into business class. Last year, travelling on a business ticket, I took the wrong corridor from the lounge reception to frantic cries of 'sir, sir, SIR!' I'll confess I ran and hid in the first class lounge toilet until it was safe for to come out and get cracking on the champagne. Eating from a buffet is so proletarian. They have table-service in First and everyone calls you 'sir.' It's a world where a Viscount isn't just a biscuit.

USAnians all call your "Sir" though.  Picture if you will a long-haired wildly-bearded scruffbag driving the world's dirtiest rental car through a Border Patrol checkpoint in southwest Texas.  He looks as though he has just swum the Rio Grande and then marched seven leagues across the desert.  The Border Patrol agents do not stick the barrels of their Mortalistastic Kill-o-Matics up his nose and demand to see his papers, no, they call him "Sir" and that was even before they'd seen my passport.  I like to think that it was the air of effortless superiority I naturally exude as a BRITON but I suspect that they do this to everyone, right up until they find your surname is "Garcia".
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on September 22, 2014, 04:22:16 pm
Oh, it's rumoured there's a lounge for those elevated above and beyond the usual choirs of traveller. Those of God-like status like Bono and Tony Blair hang out there being served canapes by supermodels while bathing in warmed Bollinger. The only way in is through a hidden door in terminal 5. I could tell you where it is, but then I'd have to kill you.

I think they had the VIP lounge on that Airline TV show, years back. With the obligatory well-spoken posho staff, not that Jeremy Wotsisname bloke.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: CAMRAMan on September 22, 2014, 04:27:43 pm
I have sat on my bag of Sainsburys Assorted Toffees and now the wrappers are very hard to remove.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on September 22, 2014, 04:34:05 pm
I have sat on my bag of Sainsburys Assorted Toffees and now the wrappers are very hard to remove.

Where did they end up?  :o
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Oaky on September 22, 2014, 04:44:18 pm
http://vegadventure.weebly.com/

British Airways started using the above website as promotion, and releasing press releases linking back to the blog. Basically some "random" guy decides to fly some pointless convoluted route for 45 hrs to get Gold Status. Gold status means you get to use the first class lounge and hammer the free booze. On the blog he shows his Gold Status card which is valid for 2 years. For most people, Gold statuses have to renew from year to year, and BA are normally very strict, miss the quota, and you lose your status. So some "freeloader" getting a guaranteed 2 years has upset quite a few business travellers.

There are more than a few PAs being told to draft angry emails to BA right now to complain about the inequity in the system right now.

As I understand it, when you achieve Gold status (or Silver for that matter), you have that status for the rest of your membership year, and will keep the status for the following year too.  you'll only drop a tier if you fail to collect enough points in that second year.  Unless it works differently for Gold than Silver.  My Silver card, for example is valid until April 2016.  When my Gold card arrives, I'm assuming that will be the same.

If he got his Gold status very soon after joining the program (or very soon after the start of his membership year) then he'd therefore have a gold card expiring about two years hence.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: CAMRAMan on September 22, 2014, 04:49:25 pm
I have sat on my bag of Sainsburys Assorted Toffees and now the wrappers are very hard to remove.

Where did they end up?  :o
Still in their bag :)
The liquorice ones are soft to start with and now look like those old penny shaped ones you get in Quality Street, only wrinklier.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on September 22, 2014, 04:54:38 pm
It's exact as Oaky said. One  year I renewed my Gold card within a month of getting it so it lasted for almost 2 years
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on September 22, 2014, 05:11:37 pm
It's exact as Oaky said. One  year I renewed my Gold card within a month of getting it so it lasted for almost 2 years

I meant to say that too, every frequent flyer programme I've been on is the same. I'm not sure what was so unreasonable about this chap. He seems to got his points by, erm, flying. Which I think is the point. But like I say, some of these status-obsessed dicks would turn up in Heaven and complain (a) that there isn't their priority entry lane and (b) that the people in economy hit the ground first.

I'm not sure BA will be using any of my posts as marketing material.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: matthew on September 23, 2014, 08:50:41 am
Hot water failure at the office...

cold shower after the ride in. Brrr
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: TimC on September 23, 2014, 09:03:26 am
I'm pretty sure when I was doing some work for the CAA at Gatwick one of the check in desks said "upper class". I wondered if you had to show a documented ancestry going back to some Norman chancer to use it.

Probably for RyanAir - you get to sit on the roof.

Upper Class is ours. No riff-raff allowed. Except to LA.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on September 23, 2014, 09:23:47 am
I'm pretty sure when I was doing some work for the CAA at Gatwick one of the check in desks said "upper class". I wondered if you had to show a documented ancestry going back to some Norman chancer to use it.

Probably for RyanAir - you get to sit on the roof.

Upper Class is ours. No riff-raff allowed. Except to LA.

Cough.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: TimC on September 23, 2014, 09:28:24 am
Ok, not many riff-raff. And only a few x-listers. And a smattering of random upgrades.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on September 23, 2014, 09:33:51 am
I was freeloading. Of course. Nothing to do with the fact that my wife plays in an orchestra with your cabin services director (or whatever her rarified job title is) and our neighbours were you senior cabin crew trainers (well, they still are, they're just not our neighbours). I think they saw me at check-in and thought, hey, he's the kind of cool guy that epitomises our Upper Class travel philosophy.

It only happened once. I think I'm on a list now.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: TimC on September 23, 2014, 09:38:13 am
Yep, seen your name on The List. That Ian, it says, is not to be allowed near the front of a Virgin plane even if he's on a lead.

PS. It's FSM. CSD is a Birdseed thing.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: spesh on September 23, 2014, 01:17:36 pm
Yep, seen your name on The List. That Ian, it says, is not to be allowed near the front of a Virgin plane even if he's on a lead.

PS. It's FSM. CSD is a Birdseed thing.

You have the FSM on your payroll?  :o

Fly Virgin Atlantic and touched by His Noodly Appendage... ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on September 24, 2014, 08:13:39 pm
As I was having a shit day at work I went to the vending machine to buy a Galaxy Caramel of happiness.
Sadly the machine had been reshuffled and it was only as the bar dropped out of the rack that I noticed that it was a bog std Galaxy solid chocolate bar in the place where the caramel bars usually nestle.
Time seemed to stand still as I noticed


Just


As



The



Bar



Dropped



Noooooooo!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: TimC on September 24, 2014, 09:24:24 pm
Yep, seen your name on The List. That Ian, it says, is not to be allowed near the front of a Virgin plane even if he's on a lead.

PS. It's FSM. CSD is a Birdseed thing.

You have the FSM on your payroll?  :o

Fly Virgin Atlantic and touched by His Noodly Appendage... ;D

You should know by now that Richard is the Deity, and the FSMs (there are 800 of them) are simply His Prophets.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: tiermat on September 26, 2014, 08:31:02 am
The office fridge is out of KitKats*!!!!

*One of the, very limited, perks of working here is that the company supplies fresh fruit daily, and KitKats (oh and mediocre, but still drinkable coffee)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on September 26, 2014, 10:17:54 am
Yep, seen your name on The List. That Ian, it says, is not to be allowed near the front of a Virgin plane even if he's on a lead.

PS. It's FSM. CSD is a Birdseed thing.

Thinking about it, I've probably demoted her through the process of managerial inflation (everyone aboard the mothership these days is a director, even the person who empties the dishwasher). I think she's the grand overlord who, when you'd much rather be in X, has decided you'll be in Y.

Getting upgrades used to be easy. All you needed were clean pants, a shave, and a smile (I'm not convinced about the former, but why take the chance). Nowadays, I reckon even RB would get bounced. Nobody wants a hobo beard in first class. I think my crappiest upgrade of late was when I wangled one on BA because they cancelled my direct flight to Phoenix and the only option was to go via IAD. Sure, said I, to the phone drone, but you can bump me up to First. He made a kind of ahhh-ahhhh-at-cha-cha noise and had to refer to his supervisor, who had to refer to his supervisor, and up the rungs of the pointless management ladder we climbed till someone begrudgingly agreed that yes, they supposed they could upgrade me. He sounded like he was agreeing to let me pull out his teeth, but I didn't care. Crowned with victory I did a celebratory lap of the terminal and presented myself to the gate. Stand in line you little plebs, because fast-track boarding here I come.

I don't know if they did it on purpose just to get me back for waking up the BA Senior Vice President Director of Awkward Customer Flight Rearrangement Services, but I swear they called the Bermuda Triangle and flew in a plane direct from 1972. I worked that out from the in-flight entertainment selection (of which they'd discarded the 'selection' component). Mind you, they'd perfectly replicated the experience of flying US domestic. Of course, we were late into IAD so I had a night at the Hilton for my troubles and then finally two days later I got to Phoenix. At some point over the midwest my bags evidently divorced me and moved to Denver.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: LEE on September 26, 2014, 10:21:44 am
As I was having a shit day at work I went to the vending machine to buy a Galaxy Caramel of happiness.

Was there a time gap between these 2 events?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: red marley on September 26, 2014, 12:12:19 pm
#bendgate

Stop wearing skinny jeans and get a sense of perspective!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: TimC on September 26, 2014, 12:19:51 pm
Yep, seen your name on The List. That Ian, it says, is not to be allowed near the front of a Virgin plane even if he's on a lead.

PS. It's FSM. CSD is a Birdseed thing.

<Description of a typical Birdseed customer experience, capped with: At some point over the midwest my bags evidently divorced me and moved to Denver.>
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: spesh on September 26, 2014, 12:56:56 pm
#bendgate

Stop wearing skinny jeans and get a sense of perspective!

Or perhaps people could ask themselves whether they actually need to upgrade to the latest piece of shiny from the Mega-Global Fruit Corporation Of Cupertino, USAnia©...


© Copyright Mr Larrington.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rafletcher on September 26, 2014, 01:39:51 pm
#bendgate

Stop wearing skinny jeans and get a sense of perspective!

Or perhaps people could ask themselves whether they actually need to upgrade to the latest piece of shiny from the Mega-Global Fruit Corporation Of Cupertino, USAnia©...


© Copyright Mr Larrington.

Funny isn't it. A few folks bend an iPhone (stupidly IMO) and it's global news - but plenty have done similar to various similarly proportioned android handsets and nary a whisper about it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on September 26, 2014, 02:17:10 pm
#bendgate

Stop wearing skinny jeans and get a sense of perspective!

Who knew that applying a lot of pressure to a long thin object might bend or break it. In other news, TVs prove not to be resistant to hammers.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: geraldc on September 26, 2014, 02:36:33 pm
We should go back to the days of the GPO and only offer people the choice of 2 fixed line rotary dial phones, black or grey.

I don't think those things ever broke.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on September 26, 2014, 02:42:27 pm
I did manage to bend my iPad 2 under mysterious circumstances so it's not even new. I was doing it before all the cool kids.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on September 26, 2014, 03:40:02 pm
At some point over the midwest my bags evidently divorced me and moved to Denver.

I'm flying back from Denver tonight.  Shall I look for them?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on September 26, 2014, 04:26:20 pm
At some point over the midwest my bags evidently divorced me and moved to Denver.

I'm flying back from Denver tonight.  Shall I look for them?

They turned up eventually. It was AA. Believe me, my bags have travelled far further than I have. If they ran space missions, there'd be bags on Mars by now, even if they hadn't got further than the moon. Anyway I had to do that horrible wait for the carousel to empty, like the worst episode ever of the Generation Game, and then the forlorn search around the baggage hall before finally dragging myself to the counter. What does your luggage look like? asks the career grumponaut behind it. Luggage. It looks like all luggage. Fortunately, as a seasoned traveller, I always have emergency pants ready to deploy.

On the plus side this was the same trip where I misread the meeting agenda and inadvertently booked myself in a luxury spa hotel for two days more than I needed to. Also the same trip where I went on a mountain bike-in-the-desert thing and there was a British expat girl as part of our group. As she seemed a bit unfamiliar with a bike I advised her that the brakes were on the wrong sides and she sneeringly exclaimed that 'of course, I know that, I've lived here ten years' before riding straight into the side of the bus and making a dent with her big stupid head.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Templogin on October 03, 2014, 05:03:13 pm
I swallowed one of the whole peppercorns in my Tesco Finest saucisson.  I suppose that I will have to drive the half mile to the hospital and get another go on the CT Scanner that the locals bought for the NHS.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on October 08, 2014, 12:46:58 pm
What's the deal with speedy boarding? It just means you sit in an uncomfortable aeroplane seat for longer instead of an uncomfortable departure lounge seat.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on October 08, 2014, 01:00:37 pm
What's the deal with speedy boarding? It just means you sit in an uncomfortable aeroplane seat for longer instead of an uncomfortable departure lounge seat.

A headstart in the fight for overhead luggage space, which on any mostly-business flight always causes delays due to the "really important businesspeople" wankers taking the piss by boarding with an oversized trolley case, a laptop bag and a rucksack.

Sadly BA have proven themselves to be utterly gutless when it comes to enforcing their own rules, to the point where the flight staff have to spend twenty minutes on the tarmac playing suitcase Tetris.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on October 08, 2014, 01:05:21 pm
What's the deal with overhead luggage space? It's much easier and less disruptive to get what you need out of your bag, put it in the seat pocket, and stick the bag under the seat in front. Aeroplanewankers.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on October 08, 2014, 01:23:21 pm
This morning at the gym, the complimentary product dispenser in my cubicle was out of shower gel.  I had to move to the cubicle next door, which involved moving my two complimentary towels to the next rail.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on October 08, 2014, 03:30:37 pm
What's the deal with overhead luggage space? It's much easier and less disruptive to get what you need out of your bag, put it in the seat pocket, and stick the bag under the seat in front. Aeroplanewankers.

Overhead lockers are BIG.
Space under seats is not.

Small day bags are great for in-flight nicknacks under the space in front. Them HYOOGE trolley-cases are best out of the way.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: nicknack on October 08, 2014, 06:37:29 pm
Small day bags are great for in-flight nicknacks under the space in front.

6' 5" and 17 stone - I don't think so.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tim Hall on October 08, 2014, 06:57:02 pm
Small day bags are great for in-flight nicknacks under the space in front.

6' 5" and 17 stone - I don't think so.

What if we put the sax in the hold?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on October 08, 2014, 07:00:27 pm
Whose hold holds nicknack's sacks? Oo err.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on October 08, 2014, 07:05:12 pm
Small day bags are great for in-flight nicknacks under the space in front.

6' 5" and 17 stone - I don't think so.

What if we put the sax in the hold?

A gentle cup, or something a bit tighter...?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: nicknack on October 08, 2014, 07:05:58 pm
Small day bags are great for in-flight nicknacks under the space in front.

6' 5" and 17 stone - I don't think so.

What if we put the sax in the hold?

Wot? And subject it to the tender ministrations of the baggage handlers? Not a chance.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: nicknack on October 08, 2014, 07:07:11 pm
A gentle cup, or something a bit tighter...?

<wince>
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Diver300 on October 08, 2014, 07:10:35 pm
The indignity of it. Call this a hotel? Not only do I have to swipe the key card though the door lock slot, rather than wave the key card in the general direction of the lock, but there is no sink to fill the coffee in and I am forced to walk yards to the basin in the bathroom. Then, horrors, the loo seat has no soft closer on it.

What with having to change gates this morning at the airport (D37 all the way to D36, nearly 100 m away, I don't know if I can cope.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Oaky on October 09, 2014, 01:20:57 am
The champagne bottle has run dry in the BA First class lounge.  Luckily my glass is still full so it's a while before I need to either flag down a member of staff to get a fresh bottle or brave the business lounge (horrors!) to see if there's some there.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Oaky on October 09, 2014, 01:38:05 am
Crisis averted!

It was replaced with admirable - actually I'd even go so far as to say alarming - urgency once the emptiness was noticed.

Time to stand down from purple alert (i.e my plan to swith to the port).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: LEE on October 21, 2014, 11:42:38 am
(http://overheard.liketodiscover.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/21.jpg)

I hear Bob Geldof has been alerted and is planning "Cotswold Aid"

(http://overheard.liketodiscover.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/52.jpg)

Apparently passengers boarding places to Syria are having their shoes checked for Chutney.

(http://overheard.liketodiscover.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/58.jpg)

You know times are hard when.....
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on October 21, 2014, 11:46:01 am
 ;D ;D ;D :D :D :D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on October 21, 2014, 12:02:22 pm
Lee, thank you for highlighting these terrible modern tragedies - I feel overcome with empathy and kindness for people dealing with such awful times.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ferret on October 21, 2014, 12:48:00 pm
Bugger! run out of mint tea!!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on October 21, 2014, 12:49:48 pm
Lee, thank you for highlighting these terrible modern tragedies - I feel overcome with empathy and kindness for people dealing with such awful times.

YA Liz Jones AICMFP

(http://legslarry.org.uk/BikeStull/coat_48.png)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: epa611 on October 21, 2014, 01:06:31 pm
Just about to order my Karsten Tent (http://www.campingtravelstore.co.uk/karstentents.html), but will have to wait until March for it  :o  (not for cycle touring obviously  ;))
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: menthel on October 21, 2014, 01:46:49 pm
Just about to order my Karsten Tent (http://www.campingtravelstore.co.uk/karstentents.html), but will have to wait until March for it  :o  (not for cycle touring obviously  ;))

Just had to follow that link...

Those are lovely, its just a shame that the wife refuses to go camping!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mrcharly-YHT on October 23, 2014, 10:01:07 am
I've run out of fairtrade organic coffee. Will have to resort to the company costco blend :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on October 23, 2014, 10:03:59 am
I'm currently staying in a hotel in Kingston upon Thames. Yesterday the end of the toilet paper wasn't folded to a pointy shape.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on October 23, 2014, 10:31:46 pm
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v249/Bloke_on_a_bike/Mobile%20Uploads/IMG_20141022_205235_zps0c96e482.jpg) (http://smg.photobucket.com/user/Bloke_on_a_bike/media/Mobile%20Uploads/IMG_20141022_205235_zps0c96e482.jpg.html)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on October 23, 2014, 10:39:40 pm
(http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v249/Bloke_on_a_bike/Mobile%20Uploads/IMG_20141022_205235_zps0c96e482.jpg) (http://smg.photobucket.com/user/Bloke_on_a_bike/media/Mobile%20Uploads/IMG_20141022_205235_zps0c96e482.jpg.html)

Yeah, always sad to see an Epson with a clogged nozzle.  Poor thing.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Redlight on November 02, 2014, 07:35:50 pm
I just found what looks like a moth hole in one of my favourite cashmere jumpers
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Regulator on November 02, 2014, 08:45:36 pm
Just about to order my Karsten Tent (http://www.campingtravelstore.co.uk/karstentents.html), but will have to wait until March for it  :o  (not for cycle touring obviously  ;))

No, no, no, no, no...

...just no.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: red marley on November 02, 2014, 11:02:31 pm
I just found what looks like a moth hole in one of my favourite cashmere jumpers

I feel your pain.

Like choosy kittehs, my moths turn their little noses up at anything that doesn't taste like Rapha merino.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on November 03, 2014, 08:40:46 am
I just found what looks like a moth hole in one of my favourite cashmere jumpers

Oh darling!

Can you get a little man to repair it for you?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Redlight on November 03, 2014, 08:48:35 am
That was my first thought but it's hard in SE London to find a dry cleaner that uses organic thread to do repairs
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: tiermat on November 03, 2014, 01:58:19 pm
My Drobo is down to it's last half-a-terabyte on one of it's partitions.

Worse than that, though is the fact that the SKY+HD box is down to 30% of it's capacity.  What if I need to record a whole series of Strictly, or the like?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on November 03, 2014, 03:30:57 pm
My 60 Gb iPod Classic has under 3 Gb space left ::-) and at the rate I am plundering the CD collections/iTunes libraries of Miss von Brandenburg and Mr Sunshine it won't take long to fill that up.
Fortunately I have a refurbished 160 Gb one upstairs :thumbsup:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on November 10, 2014, 09:47:41 am
I'm down to my last Lapsang Souchong tea bag:-(
I may have to resort to drinking the cheap stuff in the tea club tin!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on November 19, 2014, 07:10:01 pm
My internet connection failed while I was placing an order with Sainsbury's.
We are down to our last apple. (There is other fruit in the fruit bowl.)
I thought I'd use my O2 USB dongle.
Bugger needs some legacy Java software I can only get online....
Connection has now been restored.
We won't starve...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: orienteer on November 19, 2014, 08:39:32 pm
At last, a link between bytes and bites  ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on November 19, 2014, 09:04:17 pm
 ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on November 19, 2014, 10:05:36 pm
I don't have a peppercorn funnel so I scattered my rainbow peppercorns across the worktop as I filled the grinder.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Deano on November 19, 2014, 10:06:26 pm
I've had two cafetiéres stolen from work.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Efrogwr on November 19, 2014, 10:54:24 pm
I've lost my garlic press.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on November 19, 2014, 11:14:55 pm
LOLCATZ translator did an inferior job.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on November 22, 2014, 11:31:03 am
I misjudged how long it would take to get to the top of the waiting list for a reserved book and now I have three library books to be read and I'm not sure I'll get them all finished before they're due back.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on November 22, 2014, 01:18:25 pm
I misjudged how long it would take to get to the top of the waiting list for a reserved book and now I have three library books to be read and I'm not sure I'll get them all finished before they're due back.

I thought you'd just been bitten by a radioactive librarian and acquired library-fine-dodging superpowers?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on November 22, 2014, 03:47:43 pm
With great power comes great responsibility. LibraryWoman has a duty to spread the blessing of words to all and to save them from the darkness that is an empty shelf.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tim Hall on November 22, 2014, 07:15:02 pm
I misjudged how long it would take to get to the top of the waiting list for a reserved book and now I have three library books to be read and I'm not sure I'll get them all finished before they're due back.

I thought you'd just been bitten by a radioactive librarian and acquired library-fine-dodging superpowers?

New glarses needed here. I read that as library dogging superpowers.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on November 22, 2014, 07:20:01 pm
I misjudged how long it would take to get to the top of the waiting list for a reserved book and now I have three library books to be read and I'm not sure I'll get them all finished before they're due back.

I thought you'd just been bitten by a radioactive librarian and acquired library-fine-dodging superpowers?
I have, but there's a long waiting list for one of the books so I feel an obligation to read and return.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on November 23, 2014, 12:17:38 am
I misjudged how long it would take to get to the top of the waiting list for a reserved book and now I have three library books to be read and I'm not sure I'll get them all finished before they're due back.

I thought you'd just been bitten by a radioactive librarian and acquired library-fine-dodging superpowers?

New glarses needed here. I read that as library dogging superpowers.

YA Frank Erskine AICMFP.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on November 26, 2014, 01:04:58 pm
My mother can't watch a BBC video to which I've sent her the link because my father won't allow the latest version of Flash to get installed over the web on their computer.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Diver300 on November 26, 2014, 10:43:26 pm
None of the three routers we were using had any spare ethernet ports, so I had to get a fourth one working as a hub.

And an ethernet cable was faulty.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on November 27, 2014, 09:05:29 am
My mother can't watch a BBC video to which I've sent her the link because my father won't allow the latest version of Flash to get installed over the web on their computer.

Gosh. That's most harsh. When I can't get the BBC I have my man recruit a troupe of out-of-work actors and get a copy of the script so they can perform the programme live in my drawing room.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on November 27, 2014, 11:12:38 am
Gosh. That's most harsh. When I can't get the BBC I have my man recruit a troupe of out-of-work actors and get a copy of the script so they can perform the programme live in my drawing room.

I tried that once but recreating the 2011 Canadian Grand Prix made something of a mess of the Tientsin rug great-grandpater liberated during the Boxer Rebellion.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: pcolbeck on November 28, 2014, 08:29:48 am
I had a hankering to use my moka pot that has sat at the back of the cupboard for a few years. Turns out it wont work with our induction hob and I will have to buy a new moka pot made from steel instead of the traditional aluminium.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on November 29, 2014, 02:52:15 pm
Not only has the hairdresser made a complete arse of my hair, but John Lewis had sold out of some of their Klorane shampoo and some of their Klorane conditioner so now I have pomegranate shampoo and mango conditioner, instead of the same flavour for both. So I'll have shit hair that smells of fruit salad.

I really don't know how to find the strength to carry on this time.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: David Martin on November 29, 2014, 10:03:46 pm
Ok, not many riff-raff. And only a few x-listers. And a smattering of random upgrades.
I once wangled an upgrade on SAS by asking for a downgrade. The last flight back from London to Oslo and I was travelling business as that is the only way to do a 24 hour trip for a job interview. My colleague, the penniless student, was travelling cargo back from a meeting so I was going to be sociable and asked if I could change seats to economy. Instead they upgraded him to business with whihc he was mightily pleased.  The food is much better even if there is no other difference..
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ham on December 02, 2014, 10:00:03 am
Has this been posted here yet?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bwvlbJ0h35A
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on December 31, 2014, 10:18:40 pm
I have a problem with which I hope those here present will be able to help me.

In about one and three quarter hours I will have to drink the new year in.

But on my shelf I have 5 different single malts!

What am I to do? Should it be:-

Laphroaig
Glenlivet
Penderyn
Highland Park
Talisker

?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ashaman42 on December 31, 2014, 10:19:33 pm
Yes.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mcshroom on December 31, 2014, 11:00:54 pm
Yes.
;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on December 31, 2014, 11:18:51 pm
I also have:

Quote
Laphroaig
Glenlivet
Penderyn
Highland Park
Talisker

It will be the Talisker.

I also have Bell's.   :hand:
In my defence this is because #1 son (who doesn't drink) always demands a whisky and coke on such occasions.  And why shouldn't he?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on January 01, 2015, 12:03:58 am
In the end I followed your example, Basil. "What," thought I, "could possibly go wrong?"

I'm a bit disappointed to learn how little Laphroaig and Talisker I have left.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on January 01, 2015, 03:23:41 pm
I have a slab of Christmas cake but no Wensleydale. My life is pointless and empty. So much for 2015.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Auntie Helen on January 01, 2015, 09:59:38 pm
I have an entire Christmas Pudding (and I am in Germany where these things do not exist).

But I don't actually like Christmas Pudding.

I also have six Waitrose Mince Pies.

I don't like Mince Pies.

What to do?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on January 01, 2015, 10:43:10 pm
Christmas Pudding will keep.

Mince pies can be frozen.

Can they not be distributed amongst the YACFers who drift across of your Spaziergang later in the year?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on January 02, 2015, 03:12:57 pm
The other Helen has a bigger chocolate and pudding mountain and is trying to lose weight.

At current rates of consumption the next Solstice will pass and another great niece/nephew will emerge before this mountain is consumed.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on January 02, 2015, 03:14:34 pm
The milkman delivered milk date stamped 3 January today.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: barakta on January 02, 2015, 03:29:51 pm
Can you find some friendly Germans willing to sample British Xmas fare?

Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on January 02, 2015, 06:11:45 pm
I wanted to make tarte tatin the other day but couldn't find the pan to make it in.
Today I decided I could take the lack of pudding no longer and I'd make some ginger parkin. Except I had no syrup and no treacle. :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on January 02, 2015, 08:33:31 pm
The Mexican place at Newark airport where I usualy drink margaritas is now French. And they've gone all hi-tech with ipads at each table for ordering - so are now credit card only.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Auntie Helen on January 03, 2015, 10:43:38 pm
Can you find some friendly Germans willing to sample British Xmas fare?
Have already fed puds and mince pies to various Germans. They seemed to offer guarded approval but find a lot of our Christmas food over-sweet. Which is a bit bizarre knowing what i know about cakes over here.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Oaky on February 02, 2015, 11:02:12 am
The ice buckets in the BA First class lounge champagne bar are running perilously close to having no ice in them.   My Taittinger could get WARM if nothing is done about this !
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on February 02, 2015, 11:06:07 am
The ice buckets in the BA First class lounge champagne bar are running perilously close to having no ice in them.   My Taittinger could get WARM if nothing is done about this !

It's time to switch to the Port.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mrcharly-YHT on February 02, 2015, 11:07:03 am
I've run out of Pukka teabags
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Oaky on February 02, 2015, 11:24:33 am
The ice buckets in the BA First class lounge champagne bar are running perilously close to having no ice in them.   My Taittinger could get WARM if nothing is done about this !

It's time to switch to the Port.

Good thinking, but by the time my liner arrived in the colonies I'd need to be on my way home already.  ;-)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Riggers on February 02, 2015, 11:29:30 am
Christmas Pudding will keep be better if thrown in bin.

Mince pies can be frozen stuffed up yer jacksie.

Can they not be distributed amongst you not make lovely Brownies and Lemon Drizzle cake for the YACFers who drift across of your Spaziergang later in the year?

Corrected that for you Wowser.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Oaky on February 02, 2015, 11:43:41 am
The ice buckets in the BA First class lounge champagne bar are running perilously close to having no ice in them.   My Taittinger could get WARM if nothing is done about this !

It's time to switch to the Port.

Also,  I neglected to pack my smoking jacket, so I'd only have to send my man home to fetch it!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on February 02, 2015, 11:48:57 am
The ice buckets in the BA First class lounge champagne bar are running perilously close to having no ice in them.   My Taittinger could get WARM if nothing is done about this !

It's time to switch to the Port.

Also,  I neglected to pack my smoking jacket, so I'd only have to send my man home to fetch it!

Surely they have an in-lounge tailor on-hand for such eventualities. Are you sure you're not in the business class lounge?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Oaky on February 02, 2015, 12:29:49 pm
With the business class plebs, silver card holders and associated hangers-on? Not bloody likely!

Anyway, unless my free upgrade hurries the fuck up, I'm going to be sitting with them for 8 hours anyway so I'm not about to volunteer for any extra duty TVM!

Could this day get any worse?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Oaky on February 02, 2015, 12:44:23 pm
Could this day get any worse?

Apparently so!  They just asked if I wanted a newspaper then offered a Daily Mail!

Luckily, I took the precaution of popping a Times and a Telegraph in my bag for just such ayn eventuality. Just need to get somebody to iron them.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on February 15, 2015, 07:05:32 pm
Amazon is down and I need a new Kindle book for my Sunday evening soak. The bath is filling and their page remains stubbornly unresponsive. There's now an epic battle between bath and internet behemoth, who will win...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ham on February 15, 2015, 07:06:48 pm
Amazon.com seems to be up thobut
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on February 15, 2015, 07:49:00 pm
Amazon is down and I need a new Kindle book for my Sunday evening soak. The bath is filling and their page remains stubbornly unresponsive. There's now an epic battle between bath and internet behemoth, who will win...

It's not just you. (http://www.theregister.co.uk/2015/02/15/amazon_outage_europe_wide/)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on March 15, 2015, 07:15:17 pm
The cat completely destroyed the relaxing bit of my relaxing bath by perching on the side, meowing and tapping me on the arm, and then trying to pounce on my toes.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: phantasmagoriana on March 15, 2015, 07:18:07 pm
Amazon is down and I need a new Kindle book for my Sunday evening soak. The bath is filling and their page remains stubbornly unresponsive. There's now an epic battle between bath and internet behemoth, who will win...

Are Kindles waterproof? I'd love to take mine in the bath, but I'm scared of getting electrocuted.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mcshroom on March 15, 2015, 07:23:00 pm
Amazon is down and I need a new Kindle book for my Sunday evening soak. The bath is filling and their page remains stubbornly unresponsive. There's now an epic battle between bath and internet behemoth, who will win...

Are Kindles waterproof? I'd love to take mine in the bath, but I'm scared of getting electrocuted.
I don't think so, but they work through sealed plastic bags I believe :)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on March 15, 2015, 07:47:51 pm
Amazon is down and I need a new Kindle book for my Sunday evening soak. The bath is filling and their page remains stubbornly unresponsive. There's now an epic battle between bath and internet behemoth, who will win...

Are Kindles waterproof? I'd love to take mine in the bath, but I'm scared of getting electrocuted.
I don't think so, but they work through sealed plastic bags I believe :)

I put mine in a sealable sandwich bag (I'm not that cheap, it's a Waitrose sandwich bag). Works fine. Unless you undo the thing to jiggle it into position while in the bath, one of those things that with hindsight could only have had one outcome (after a week in the airing cupboard it worked fine, and as a boon smells of Badedas now). There are proper waterproof cases but a medium sandwich bag does the same job at a fraction of the cost. Reading a good book in a hot bath with a bottle of fine beer on the side is why the first world was invented.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on March 27, 2015, 09:45:44 pm
FWP #1 - An evening of car woes, ending in an AA rescue truck, mean I need a stiff drink. (I'm home now, and fine, but still.)

FWP #2 - I'm all out of whiskey.

FWP #3 - The little shop at the top of the road doesn't sell Jim Beam. It only has Jack Daniels, which ISN'T EVEN REAL BOURBON!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on March 28, 2015, 01:33:50 am
ALL bourbon is made in bathtubs.  By gangsters.

Trufax.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on March 28, 2015, 07:51:16 am
When it comes to bourbon one can do much better than Jim Beam, though the little shop at the top of the road may not oblige.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pingu on March 28, 2015, 01:39:53 pm
FWP #1 - An evening of car woes, ending in an AA rescue truck, mean I need a stiff drink. (I'm home now, and fine, but still.)

FWP #2 - I'm all out of whiskey.

FWP #3 - The little shop at the top of the road doesn't sell Jim Beam. It only has Jack Daniels, which ISN'T EVEN REAL BOURBON!

So, is FWP #4, nae whisky?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on March 28, 2015, 02:13:31 pm
FWP #1 - An evening of car woes, ending in an AA rescue truck, mean I need a stiff drink. (I'm home now, and fine, but still.)

FWP #2 - I'm all out of whiskey.

FWP #3 - The little shop at the top of the road doesn't sell Jim Beam. It only has Jack Daniels, which ISN'T EVEN REAL BOURBON!

So, is FWP #4, nae whisky?

No, I decided the least worst course of action was to slum it with a bottle of JD. It's not that bad.

And yes, I'm sure there's plenty of better bourbons than Jim Beam but it's what I usually keep in the house. The "black label" stuff, if it's there. It's reasonably priced, fairly easy to get in supermarkets, and (IMO) a lot better than Jack Daniels.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: jsabine on March 28, 2015, 02:36:01 pm
I concur with the honourable member for Northlandshire.

Whiskey /= whisky.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on March 28, 2015, 02:44:28 pm
I thought Whiskey was Irish Whisky IUSWIM?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: jsabine on March 28, 2015, 02:47:03 pm
Whiskey=Irish or American.
Whisky=Scotch (or Scotch-a-likes, like Japanese or Welsh).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on March 28, 2015, 10:37:04 pm
I can't book a mini-cab online for tomorrow's outing because their website won't accept my credentials, which I have used successfully previously used and have rechecked.
Their website is refusing to send me my 'forgotten' password.
I cannot phone the cab firm because that would disturb partner, who is listening to a recording of the Mendelssohn he was practicing on our grand piano earlier.

I'll have to phone them tomorrow.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on March 29, 2015, 01:59:28 pm
My stupid watch is supposed to change gear automagically at the start of BST and hasn't.  I have had to tell the wretched thing that I'm in Paris :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on March 29, 2015, 02:50:12 pm
My stupid watch is supposed to change gear automagically at the start of BST and hasn't.  I have had to tell the wretched thing that I'm in Paris :(

Surely Mortagne-au-Perche!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on March 29, 2015, 02:54:27 pm
Alas its time-zone jibbler is not that fine-grained...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on April 01, 2015, 01:04:48 pm
Radio-controlled clocks aligned to Frankfurt only realign the day after the clocks change.
Those aligned to BRITAIN change at the correct time.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pickled Onion on April 10, 2015, 09:47:16 am
My stupid watch is supposed to change gear automagically at the start of BST and hasn't.  I have had to tell the wretched thing that I'm in Paris :(
My radio alarm clock magically changes to BST. Unfortunately it uses DAB to do so, with the resulting hilarity of the alarm firing an hour late, quickly followed by the time changing and the clock deciding I've had an hour to wake up and switching off again.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on April 10, 2015, 10:21:37 am
I've just noticed that the date (analog) on my watch was showing 7th.  That means I've not looked at it to see what the date is for the whole of March.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on April 10, 2015, 05:25:58 pm
The bottle of tonic that was in the fridge had a loose cap and was flat. We therefore have warm tonic in our G&T.
Also, there's slim line tonic in the cupboard, how on earth did that get there?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on April 10, 2015, 05:34:10 pm
The bottle of tonic that was in the fridge had a loose cap and was flat. We therefore have warm tonic in our G&T.
Also, there's slim line tonic in the cupboard, how on earth did that get there?

 :facepalm:  Sorry.  I bet Mrs. B put it there.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on April 10, 2015, 05:58:47 pm
Mrs B can have it back....
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on April 10, 2015, 06:01:19 pm
I keep trying to explain to her.  You have a rubbish g&t.  Then you have a bag of crisps!  ???
I don't get it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on April 10, 2015, 06:12:00 pm
The bottle of tonic that was in the fridge had a loose cap and was flat. We therefore have warm tonic in our G&T.
Also, there's slim line tonic in the cupboard, how on earth did that get there?
Chr!$t! That's two really serious things which appear to have gone awry in short succession.
We need to switch off the internet until both are sorted. FFS.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on April 10, 2015, 06:14:57 pm
The Gin wasn't in the fridge.  >:( >:( >:(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on April 10, 2015, 06:19:37 pm
Whiskey=Irish or American.
Whisky=Scotch (or Scotch-a-likes, like Japanese or Welsh).

If it's Welsh it's wysgi.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on April 10, 2015, 06:48:41 pm
The Gin wasn't in the fridge.  >:( >:( >:(

It wasn't but that's OK...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on April 10, 2015, 06:50:29 pm
Trying to persuade myself not to buy an Apple watch
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on April 10, 2015, 07:09:50 pm
Paul.  Don't buy an Apple watch.

HTH
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on April 10, 2015, 07:54:29 pm
Trying to persuade myself not to buy an Apple watch

The waiting list is now many months.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on April 11, 2015, 11:01:33 am
Bottles of tonic are wrong unless you plan to use the entire bottle. Those little cans are perfect and guarantee the correct level of effervescence in your G&T.

I don't need an Apple watch but I do need a new iPhone. The thought of wrangling an updated sim out of EE puts me off. It's bound to go wrong. Plus I might have to start paying for the mobile internets again.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on April 11, 2015, 11:43:16 am
Trying to persuade myself not to buy an Apple watch

The waiting list is now many months.

They quoted June to me :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on April 11, 2015, 12:53:17 pm
The other Helen has a bigger chocolate and pudding mountain and is trying to lose weight.

At current rates of consumption the next Solstice will pass and another great niece/nephew will emerge before this mountain is consumed.

We have STILL not cleared the Christmas chocolate mountain but it's only the week after Easter.
There's now another niece/nephew in the making...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Feline on April 11, 2015, 02:18:18 pm
Trying to persuade myself not to buy an Apple watch

I definitely didn't want an Apple watch. So why am I checking out all the different models?  :-\
If the heart rate could talk to my Garmin then I would simply have to have one .....
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ham on April 11, 2015, 02:44:11 pm
For anyone that didn't realise it, Scot Adams has been writing an occasional strip titled "Robots Read News" published in his blog and twitter feed. Here's the latest

(https://41.media.tumblr.com/133005cb88776a17448b261f8c2f2f0f/tumblr_inline_nmlf7iq9dO1t63ajm_500.jpg)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on April 11, 2015, 05:54:46 pm
"Giftee"  :sick: :sick: :sick: :sick: :sick: :sick: :sick: :sick: :sick: :sick: :sick: :sick:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on April 12, 2015, 12:37:01 pm
My cow-worker with the gold card isn't travelling (because: sore bum <titter>).
So I am in the normal lounge, drinking flat wine, instead of being in the first class lounge drinking champagne. Bah.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: TimC on April 12, 2015, 12:48:20 pm
Trying to persuade myself not to buy an Apple watch

I definitely didn't want an Apple watch. So why am I checking out all the different models?  :-\
If the heart rate could talk to my Garmin then I would simply have to have one .....

I examined the Apple Watch in some detail at the Pasadena Apple Store on Friday. It's pretty. It's quite big. It doesn't do very much. I own a Garmin Vivoactive. Not as pretty, but the screen is on all the time and the charge lasts about 3 weeks. It has GPS onboard (the Apple Watch uses your phone's GPS). It can have all sorts of apps on it, though the selection available right now isn't very inspiring. And it's £175 at Wiggle.

If you need 'pretty', there are several Google Wear/Android varieties that make the cut at $300 or less.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on April 15, 2015, 03:59:05 pm
The dog has lost her "good" frisbee. Fortunately she still has her less good, chewed one.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on April 15, 2015, 03:59:21 pm
The less good frisbee doesn't fly as well
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on April 16, 2015, 04:09:41 pm
The dog has lost her "good" frisbee. Fortunately she still has her less good, chewed one.


Stand down! It's been found. One of her friends returned it this afternoon.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on April 23, 2015, 11:44:24 am
Trying to persuade myself not to buy an Apple watch

The waiting list is now many months.

They quoted June to me :(

And it seems they won't keep to that either!

I've just had the e-mail that it's due tomorrow!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jacomus on April 23, 2015, 12:44:11 pm
Trying to persuade myself not to buy an Apple watch

The waiting list is now many months.

They quoted June to me :(

And it seems they won't keep to that either!

I've just had the e-mail that it's due tomorrow!

I am under strictest instructions (and probably have had some sort of combined GPS tracker & electroshock chip implanted in my neck whilst sleeping) to get Miss Emily's iWatch home as fast as humanly possible when it is delivered to my office.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on April 23, 2015, 12:48:01 pm
You've just reminded me that I have to be in the office tomorrow :(

WIll have to instruct Mrs F not to leave the house until it's delievered
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on April 24, 2015, 01:27:38 pm
I had a beautiful French manicure this morning, then chipped one of my nails when I unlocked my bike to come home.

Sitting in a corner rocking and keening now.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on April 24, 2015, 01:54:11 pm
Sending soup, hugs and fresh ground coffee . . .
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on April 24, 2015, 02:04:20 pm
Ooh, lovely!  Thank you!

I was only joking about the rocking and the keening, y'know  ;D

Riding the beautiful fixte mixte to town in the sun was bloody lovely.  So was riding it home again.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: pumpkin on April 24, 2015, 02:12:00 pm
mappin & Webb (posh jeweller) told me that a watch I enquired about (and will never own) isn't due in yet and will 'whizz-out' when it does arrive in-store. I can't afford it but just wanted to have a look at the actual item. She looked at me oddly when I pointed out there is a factory making the watch and there will be another one along. I-watch? yet another triumph of the Marketing Dept.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on April 24, 2015, 02:58:31 pm

Riding the beautiful fixte mixte to town in the sun was bloody lovely.  So was riding it home again.

Now that is a problem to savour. Also the juxtaposition of a manicure and a bike ride . . .
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on May 01, 2015, 10:52:06 am
Only two weeks after my coffee machine died, my kettle is now deceased as well.

You have no idea.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: The Seldom Killer on May 01, 2015, 10:57:21 am
Overheard in Waitrose yesterday "Charles, please will you hurry up and decide between quinoa and wild rice, we need to get Jemima to her dance class".

The struggle is real.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on May 01, 2015, 11:40:02 am
Yes, but what were you doing in Waitrose, Comrade :demon:

(Denounces TSK to the Thought Police)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on May 01, 2015, 11:47:11 am
Can't afford both obviously.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: menthel on May 03, 2015, 10:19:25 pm
I had to set up my new AV receiver this morning, it took a whole hour!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on May 03, 2015, 11:13:13 pm
I had to set up my new AV receiver this morning, it took a whole hour!

Blimey, that's quick!  It took me that long just to identify all the bits of string :o
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: sam on May 04, 2015, 06:54:25 am
The dog has lost her "good" frisbee. Fortunately she still has her less good, chewed one.

The less good frisbee doesn't fly as well

(http://www.prettygoodbritain.com/pics/frisbee.jpg)
First World Certificate of Accomplishment


Some of my favourite software is now only available on Adobe's Creative Cloud, which is not something I wish to sign up for. This means I have to clutter my desk with an old iMac which can still run it.

The wireless mouse on the newer computer has gone a bit wonky, forcing me to revert to a tethered mouse which isn't touch sensitive. I'm coping.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: menthel on May 05, 2015, 11:28:37 am
I had to set up my new AV receiver this morning, it took a whole hour!

Blimey, that's quick!  It took me that long just to identify all the bits of string :o

Denon very kindly supply stickers to identify the bits that plug into other bits. It was just a matter of labelling them up prior to removing then from the old one.

Now the issue is that I need to RTFM to work out how to get it to start at a decent volume and the manual is on a CD. I don't have a CD drive for the laptop any more! Looks like I will have to find it and download it instead. Ah, the pain!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on May 05, 2015, 11:32:34 am
Only two weeks after my coffee machine died, my kettle is now deceased as well.

You have no idea.

Is this not a good opportunity to practise a little camp cookery?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: tiermat on May 05, 2015, 11:35:12 am
Only two weeks after my coffee machine died, my kettle is now deceased as well.

You have no idea.

We have spares of both, the kettle you could keep, the coffee machine (which you know well) would have to be a loan.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on May 05, 2015, 01:03:44 pm
Denon very kindly supply stickers to identify the bits that plug into other bits. It was just a matter of labelling them up prior to removing then from the old one.

They do for the squeakers but there's almost as much non-squeaker string in there.  Plus there is a non-zero probability of the squeaker setup telling you that the phase of at least one squeaker is 180 degrees out :demon:

Now the issue is that I need to RTFM to work out how to get it to start at a decent volume and the manual is on a CD. I don't have a CD drive for the laptop any more! Looks like I will have to find it and download it instead. Ah, the pain!

What model is yours?  I have the manual for mine (AVR-X2000) already on the Babbage-Engine...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: menthel on May 05, 2015, 02:00:00 pm
Denon very kindly supply stickers to identify the bits that plug into other bits. It was just a matter of labelling them up prior to removing then from the old one.

They do for the squeakers but there's almost as much non-squeaker string in there.  Plus there is a non-zero probability of the squeaker setup telling you that the phase of at least one squeaker is 180 degrees out :demon:

Now the issue is that I need to RTFM to work out how to get it to start at a decent volume and the manual is on a CD. I don't have a CD drive for the laptop any more! Looks like I will have to find it and download it instead. Ah, the pain!

What model is yours?  I have the manual for mine (AVR-X2000) already on the Babbage-Engine...

Ah, mine (x1100) came with labels for the whole kit and caboodle, so another thumbs up from me to Denon. I have found the manual and abused work's bandwidth and sent it to myself, so all is good. Apart from having to plogh through the bloody thing for the one, tiny bit of info required.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on May 10, 2015, 01:33:55 pm
Sainsbury's did not have the Basics strawberries or the easy peelers I ordered. We will have to eat other fruit.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on May 10, 2015, 07:37:24 pm
Getting a new stove the day I get back from a camping trip is just mean.

I might go pack a rucksack full of camping kit, walk up to the forest (half hour or so away), brew up, and walk back again.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on May 10, 2015, 11:17:57 pm
Getting a new stove the day I get back from a camping trip is just mean.

I might go pack a rucksack full of camping kit, walk up to the forest (half hour or so away), brew up, and walk back again.

And so it came to pass that the 'nanoadventure' was invented.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on May 12, 2015, 01:12:27 pm
Getting a new stove the day I get back from a camping trip is just mean.

I might go pack a rucksack full of camping kit, walk up to the forest (half hour or so away), brew up, and walk back again.
Sounds like an excellent plan.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mrcharly-YHT on May 12, 2015, 01:28:33 pm
Getting a new stove the day I get back from a camping trip is just mean.

I might go pack a rucksack full of camping kit, walk up to the forest (half hour or so away), brew up, and walk back again.

And so it came to pass that the 'nanoadventure' was invented.
I'm surely not the only person here who has tried (and timed) several stoves in the back garden?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on May 13, 2015, 11:01:04 am
While camping at the weekend my coffee filters got damp, so I had to drink tea.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on May 13, 2015, 03:13:53 pm
I have to take my Apple Watch off to let the scanner read my boarding pass as the reader is too narrow for a wrist
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on May 14, 2015, 12:25:18 pm
I have to take my Apple Watch off to let the scanner read my boarding pass as the reader is too narrow for a wrist

Outrageous!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hatler on May 14, 2015, 12:27:19 pm
I have to take my Apple Watch off to let the scanner read my boarding pass as the reader is too narrow for a wrist
Wouldn't it just be easier to Chip & PIN yourself now ?

:-)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on May 14, 2015, 12:28:09 pm
I have to take my Apple Watch off to let the scanner read my boarding pass as the reader is too narrow for a wrist

Outrageous!

I know I'm really feeling quite traumatised by the whole experience

And just to rub salt in the wound there were more people waiting for priority boarding than standard boarding!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on May 14, 2015, 12:28:57 pm
I have to take my Apple Watch off to let the scanner read my boarding pass as the reader is too narrow for a wrist
Wouldn't it just be easier to Chip & PIN yourself now ?

:-)

I did look into that but you don't want to know where they put the chip!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: madcow on May 19, 2015, 12:42:59 am
My employer has just upgraded my mobile phone . Out goes Blackberry in comes a sparkling Galaxy A3.
But wait on , the new phone is a good few centimetres longer than the BB.
Now it won't fit into the  waterproof wallet that I always use when out on the bike. Just how will I cope?
Can I claim a new wallet on expenses, boss?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: bumper on May 26, 2015, 09:09:19 am
EMERGENCY

My kettle has broken  :o :o :o
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on May 26, 2015, 01:43:45 pm
EMERGENCY

My kettle has broken  :o :o :o

Kettles are now so cheap that having a spare in case of kettle death makes sense. I was glad I had one for when my cleaning lady killed my 35 year old Russell-Hobbs.
We have gas and could also use the little hob kettle I bought from Poundstretcher a decade ago...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rafletcher on May 26, 2015, 01:56:28 pm
[quote author=PaulF link=topic=78430.msg1861652#msg1861652 date=1431602889

And just to rub salt in the wound there were more people waiting for priority boarding than standard boarding!
[/quote]

Standard Ryanair then  :thumbsup:   
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on May 26, 2015, 04:44:37 pm
I've been stuck on the same level of Candy Crush for weeks
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: bumper on May 26, 2015, 04:51:56 pm
EMERGENCY

My kettle has broken  :o :o :o

Kettles are now so cheap that having a spare in case of kettle death makes sense. I was glad I had one for when my cleaning lady killed my 35 year old Russell-Hobbs.
We have gas and could also use the little hob kettle I bought from Poundstretcher a decade ago...

The spare kettle has been in service today  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: LEE on May 26, 2015, 04:56:19 pm
EMERGENCY

My kettle has broken  :o :o :o

Kettles are now so cheap that having a spare in case of kettle death makes sense. I was glad I had one for when my cleaning lady killed my 35 year old Russell-Hobbs.
We have gas and could also use the little hob kettle I bought from Poundstretcher a decade ago...

Keeping 2 spare kettles in case your working one breaks (after 35 years) seems extreme. 

If nothing else the warranty on your backup may be 34 years out of date.

I live 2 minutes from CURRYS and next-day delivery is rife.  A pan will suffice for a day.



Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: bumper on May 26, 2015, 05:06:28 pm
The jetboil is my back up-back up.

If i didnt have my tea/coffee, I would go on strike ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on May 26, 2015, 07:10:34 pm
EMERGENCY

My kettle has broken  :o :o :o

Kettles are now so cheap that having a spare in case of kettle death makes sense. I was glad I had one for when my cleaning lady killed my 35 year old Russell-Hobbs.
We have gas and could also use the little hob kettle I bought from Poundstretcher a decade ago...

Keeping 2 spare kettles in case your working one breaks (after 35 years) seems extreme. 

If nothing else the warranty on your backup may be 34 years out of date.

I live 2 minutes from CURRYS and next-day delivery is rife.  A pan will suffice for a day.

Bought spare kettle after new kettle, bought when I was running two homes, sprung a leak and I didn't fancy mixing water and electricity.
Downsized to single home and resumed use of my old Student kettle.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: pumpkin on May 29, 2015, 03:42:33 pm
My 5 yr. old daughter wants her towels 'fluffy' ie dried in a dryer (££) as opposed to air dried on the line.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on May 29, 2015, 04:47:23 pm
^ tell her a puppy/kitten gets it everytime the tumble drier is run....
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on May 29, 2015, 04:57:58 pm
Hook the drier up to a bicycle generator and tell her to start pedalling.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on June 10, 2015, 11:16:27 am
I couldn't get into the gym at my hotel this morning.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pickled Onion on June 15, 2015, 08:17:53 am
My 5 yr. old daughter wants her towels 'fluffy' ie dried in a dryer (££) as opposed to air dried on the line.

Me too. I dry on the line and then fluff up with 5 mins in the dryer (pp).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on June 18, 2015, 12:43:28 pm
These grapes are tarter than I really like.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on June 18, 2015, 03:43:18 pm
I like mangoes put peeling them and removing the middle is such a trial.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: CrinklyLion on June 18, 2015, 04:53:57 pm
http://lifehacker.com/the-easiest-safest-way-to-slice-a-mango-1592923912

http://lifehacker.com/how-to-peel-a-mango-in-under-10-seconds-1603398060

http://www.buzzfeed.com/richardhjames/youve-been-peeling-mangos-the-wrong-way-your-whole-life
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on June 18, 2015, 06:23:34 pm
Most excellent. I have adapted the method by using my lower teeth instead of the glass. I don't many dinner invites for some reason.

You can buy pre-prepared mangoes in packets, which is very first world. But don't, because the people that sell these do not understand mango. It's horrid, underripe mango. Proper mangoes should be bought and forgotten about in the bottom of the fridge for several weeks until the teeter on the edge of collapse. Oh, juicy succulent tropicalness. It puts the Umbongo in the Congo.

Apropos of nothing, but I have to figure out how to get some Umbongo to the Congo, since the people of the DRC are unacquainted with their attachment to the sweet beveridge. The same two people mocked the stuffed lion (toy, not a real one) I was carrying around OR Tambo at the weekend. Not a scary lion, apparently. I don't think they have lions in the Congo either.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ham on June 19, 2015, 06:06:37 pm
I am ripping the joint Ham Hall CD collection to disk and I am developing a painful little finger from hoiking the disks out of the carrier.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on June 19, 2015, 06:17:36 pm
There was no digital radio reception this morning. I was reduced to listening over the internet on my iPhone.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Feanor on June 20, 2015, 09:13:30 am
Sitting as I am in seat 1A, with the debris of a Champaign breakfast scattered about the fold-out table in front of me, I an quite unable to reach the inflight magazine in the bulkhead pouch so far off is it. I may have to call the flight attendant.

(I didn't actually do the champers, a bit early even for me. Same cannot be said of the couple in 1C and D, who managed 3 mini bottles each. )

ETA: missed my connection in Amsterdam and am reviewing the Champagne situation in the lounge.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on June 22, 2015, 08:13:52 pm
I only have Olive bread for breakfast tomorrow, I don't think it's going to go well with my Bonne Maman Orange Marmalade.....
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on June 22, 2015, 08:17:10 pm
How about with some nice cheese and a glass of white wine?

If a work day, you may wish to replace wine with espresso.  Or maybe not.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on June 22, 2015, 08:48:38 pm
How about with some nice cheese and a glass of white wine?

If a work day, you may wish to replace wine with espresso.  Or maybe not.

I'm on holiday in France so wine for breakfast is probably OK. There is some cheese in my panniers but it's a bit sweaty in this heat.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on June 22, 2015, 09:12:00 pm
The café at the Royal Academy is closed. The Friends' Lounge does not serve apple juice.
The courtyard café closed in the rain.
We will be forced to cross Piccadilly and try Fortnum and Mason for better fare.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on June 22, 2015, 11:06:33 pm
Last time I was in Fortnum and Mason I was castigated for name-dropping by no less a person than the queen.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on June 24, 2015, 05:11:16 pm
I'm really hungry and I went to get a packet of crisps, but the vending machine isn't working because it's been unplugged. I daren't plug it in in case it has been unplugged for a reason.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on June 24, 2015, 06:22:05 pm
If it was for a reason there should be a sign...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on June 24, 2015, 06:23:19 pm
Go on, Kirst.  Live a little.  Go out and get those crisps!  Plug that sucker in!

If it 'splodes run away and deny all knowledge.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on June 24, 2015, 06:25:25 pm
Last time I did something like that I got 6 free cans of Ting.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mcshroom on June 24, 2015, 06:26:10 pm
If it's unplugged, then the anti-tilt alarms will be disabled :demon:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: marcusjb on June 24, 2015, 07:03:42 pm
https://yacf.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=91543.0;topicseen

 ;)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on June 24, 2015, 09:58:39 pm
Go on, Kirst.  Live a little.  Go out and get those crisps!  Plug that sucker in!

If it 'splodes run away and deny all knowledge.
I was worried it might come to life and eat me.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on June 25, 2015, 06:38:29 pm
Oh no, the dishwasher needs, erm, washing. I opened it this morning to find everything dirty and a murky puddle in the bottom. It turns out they have a filter. Who knew? And it's completely full of completely grotesque green sludge that I'm not touching. And whose idea was making the inside out of unsuspecting angles the seemed to have been designed solely to catch grunk and be difficult to clean?

That's not the worst of it, the cleaner can't come until tomorrow afternoon. I've barricaded the kitchen door, the filter is seriously horrormovie.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on June 25, 2015, 10:43:18 pm
The washer could have been stopped before the cycle had ended. Try another wash using a cleaning capsule.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on June 26, 2015, 10:36:16 am
The washer could have been stopped before the cycle had ended. Try another wash using a cleaning capsule.

It had but the filter is clogged. It's stupid, it's a really fine mesh filter, jeez, just send that shit down the drain. We used to have fearsome Teutonic dishwasher that never seemed to need to cleaning other than an occasional empty cycle, then we moved house and got an Italian one. It's exactly what you'd expect from an Italian appliance. I only bought it because it was stainless steel.

I tried going near the filter again, but I swear the green stuff was moving.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on June 26, 2015, 10:44:16 am

The washer could have been stopped before the cycle had ended. Try another wash using a cleaning capsule.

It had but the filter is clogged. It's stupid, it's a really fine mesh filter, jeez, just send that shit down the drain. We used to have fearsome Teutonic dishwasher that never seemed to need to cleaning other than an occasional empty cycle, then we moved house and got an Italian one. It's exactly what you'd expect from an Italian appliance. I only bought it because it was stainless steel.

I tried going near the filter again, but I swear the green stuff was moving.

Oh you great wimp.  Plastic bag on the hand, lift out the filter, enclose it in plastic bag ASAP before it runs away, give it a good bang to get some solids out then dunk it in a bowl of bleach water to kill it.  Hold it down with a wooden spoon till it stops struggling.

Go on ian, you can do it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on June 26, 2015, 10:52:52 am
You can, Ian. In fact, you must; not for the sake of your washing up, but so you can write a post here describing what went wrong and how you then had to call the plumber to free your fingers from drain.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on June 26, 2015, 10:57:26 am
The washer could have been stopped before the cycle had ended. Try another wash using a cleaning capsule.

It had but the filter is clogged. It's stupid, it's a really fine mesh filter, jeez, just send that shit down the drain.

The filter doesn't just lead to the drain, thobut.  For most of the cycle, the shit is re-circulated through the sprinkler thingers and associated plumbing, which I'm sure would be a whole other level of fun to de-slime.

I'm suspicious that dishwashers contravene the third law of thermodynamics.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: tiermat on June 26, 2015, 03:31:54 pm
That's a good point, I need to add "run a cleaning bottle through the dishwasher" to my list of things to do today...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on June 26, 2015, 05:28:52 pm

The washer could have been stopped before the cycle had ended. Try another wash using a cleaning capsule.

It had but the filter is clogged. It's stupid, it's a really fine mesh filter, jeez, just send that shit down the drain. We used to have fearsome Teutonic dishwasher that never seemed to need to cleaning other than an occasional empty cycle, then we moved house and got an Italian one. It's exactly what you'd expect from an Italian appliance. I only bought it because it was stainless steel.

I tried going near the filter again, but I swear the green stuff was moving.

Oh you great wimp.  Plastic bag on the hand, lift out the filter, enclose it in plastic bag ASAP before it runs away, give it a good bang to get some solids out then dunk it in a bowl of bleach water to kill it.  Hold it down with a wooden spoon till it stops struggling.

Go on ian, you can do it.

I did, in the end, do it myself because the cleaner couldn't come until Monday. I probably shouldn't have described that sludge to her in such graphical terms. It was virulently green and made me feel a little bit sick.

As a plus, after one and a half years I've finally found out how to change the programme.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on June 26, 2015, 07:29:14 pm
Well done ian, I think you deserve several stiff G&T's as a treat.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on June 26, 2015, 10:57:00 pm
Gosh British pluck!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on June 30, 2015, 08:00:22 am
Whilst cleansing myself in the shower on Saturday evening I had reason to discover that a power shower needs power as everything went dark. I had to soapily tip-toe across the bathroom and use the non-power shower above the bath. It's so weak. I don't know how people in poor countries without rainfall showers survive. It must be terrible for them, like shopping at Lidl.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: fboab on June 30, 2015, 09:07:39 am
The cafe on the ferry for my 5th foreign excursion this year has no Apricot jam for my continental breakfast. I might as well have had a full English.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on June 30, 2015, 09:22:19 am
From this BBC article (http://www.bbc.com/capital/story/20150626-a-new-status-symbol-less-space) about living in a space that is under 33 square metres (350 square feet): If you’re buying a tiny home or apartment, you’ll need at least six months to downsize your possessions.

How many possessions is one meant to acquire so that it takes at least six months to get rid of the excess?
Living in Slovakia, I'm sure you know plenty of some people living in less than 33 square metres. I can quite easily imagine it taking six months to get rid of all the possessions I've seen in some such places, let alone what you could have when moving from a larger place. Unless, of course, you simply dump most of it on the pavement for the council to collect in six months' time, which seems to be the First World Student way. (Cue discussion on the geographical and other frontiers of the First World.)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on July 13, 2015, 07:20:29 pm
The cafe on the ferry for my 5th foreign excursion this year has no Apricot jam for my continental breakfast. I might as well have had a full English.

I have a cousin who holidayed in Phuket at the end of 2004.
He, his wife and 2 tiny kids had a miraculous escape from the tsunami, about which he blogged.
There was no marmalade available for breakfast immediately after the event.

Somebody complained.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on July 13, 2015, 07:24:20 pm
Emails to my Elderly Father are bouncing or getting lost in the ether.
I have phoned him to tell him and he is Not Happy.
Dad is a month off 85.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Luke on July 24, 2015, 07:57:20 pm
So many nachos, but only so much salsa.  :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on July 24, 2015, 09:38:15 pm
I've got some of that nice goopy Arla blue cheese dip here if you want it Luke?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on July 25, 2015, 12:17:24 am
The bakery had sold out of sourdough loaves so I had to make do with a white bloomer.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on July 28, 2015, 02:32:56 pm
My bicycle is locked up at the opposite end of the train from my first class seat.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on July 28, 2015, 02:57:01 pm
The station porter will bring it to your carriage door on arrival at your destination. A small tip is appropriate for this service; more if he also attaches your luggage to the rack, less if he shifts the derailleurs.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on July 28, 2015, 03:06:41 pm
My bicycle is locked up at the opposite end of the train from my first class seat.

Philistines! Serving wine in a water glass?!? Perhaps I should be grateful the cutlery is not plastic...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Efrogwr on July 29, 2015, 08:18:15 pm
The Waitrose branch at the motorway services didn't have any fresh tagliatelle.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on July 29, 2015, 08:33:12 pm
A megahal bot just turned off my desk lamp.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on July 29, 2015, 08:42:55 pm
A megahal bot just turned off my desk lamp.

How did it do that?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on July 29, 2015, 08:58:48 pm
A megahal bot just turned off my desk lamp.

How did it do that?

Code: [Select]
-!- lamp [~arduino@dyn5.ductilebiscuit.net] has joined #27ps 
<eoin> lamp: all@0
-!- mode/#27ps [+v lamp] by ChanServ
<lamp> Ch1 set to: 0
<lamp> Ch2 set to: 0   
<kim> thanks, eoin
<eoin> Weirdly barakta can print from open orifice again
<kim> lamp: ch2@80
<lamp> Ch2 set to: 80

I'd overlooked eoin learning the lamp commands.  Need to change the code so they're ignored.   :facepalm:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on July 29, 2015, 09:00:21 pm
Um, I'm sorry I asked.... intrigued by ductilebiscuit tho ;)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on July 29, 2015, 09:02:18 pm
Um, I'm sorry I asked.... intrigued by ductilebiscuit tho ;)
Ductile biscuit is good IME  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on July 29, 2015, 09:02:42 pm
Um, I'm sorry I asked.... intrigued by ductilebiscuit tho ;)

A long time ago in a university far far away, I once did a seminar on high-temperature superconductors.  The problem with these materials is that they're ceramics, which makes them about as ductile as....
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on July 29, 2015, 09:08:33 pm
My bicycle is locked up at the opposite end of the train from my first class seat.

Philistines! Serving wine in a water glass?!? Perhaps I should be grateful the cutlery is not plastic...
What was the material the 'glass' was made of.
I dunno, you go for these cut-price travel options and then have the temerity, nay, the unmitigated audacity to complain about that which you haven't paid for  ::-)
 ;)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: barakta on July 30, 2015, 08:42:09 am
A megahal bot just turned off my desk lamp.

How did it do that?

Code: [Select]
-!- lamp [~arduino@dyn5.ductilebiscuit.net] has joined #27ps 
<eoin> lamp: all@0
-!- mode/#27ps [+v lamp] by ChanServ
<lamp> Ch1 set to: 0
<lamp> Ch2 set to: 0   
<kim> thanks, eoin
<eoin> Weirdly barakta can print from open orifice again
<kim> lamp: ch2@80
<lamp> Ch2 set to: 80

I'd overlooked eoin learning the lamp commands.  Need to change the code so they're ignored.   :facepalm:

HAHAHAHAHA!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on July 30, 2015, 12:37:58 pm
My bicycle is locked up at the opposite end of the train from my first class seat.

Philistines! Serving wine in a water glass?!? Perhaps I should be grateful the cutlery is not plastic...
What was the material the 'glass' was made of.
Thankfully it was actually glass.

Quote
I dunno, you go for these cut-price travel options and then have the temerity, nay, the unmitigated audacity to complain about that which you haven't paid for  ::-)
 ;)
As I wasn't on the Orient Express or some other international/Continental service I should have lowered my expectations.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on August 06, 2015, 10:04:13 am
As it's regularly scheduled tube strike time, I hope we're all braced for those terrible, heartbreaking stories of commuters forced to walk for sometimes up to twenty minutes on a warm summer's day. I just heard on the radio that one person had to watch three full buses go by. Such anguish so early in the day. It can only get worse.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on August 06, 2015, 09:30:34 pm
There is so much stuff in my freezer it's difficult to shut the door.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on August 06, 2015, 11:25:27 pm
There is so much stuff in my freezer it's difficult to shut the door.

Have you checked there isn't a long-forgotten pair of trousers embedded in the iceberg at the back?  That happened to me once[1]...


[1] Admittedly in a student house.  None of the current housemates claimed the trousers, and there wasn't any chewing gum, mysterious stain or other sensible reason for them being there.  It remains an unsolved mystery.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on August 07, 2015, 08:07:38 am
Pretty sure.  ;D

I did a lot of cooking last weekend and froze it in batches, plus there's chicken legs for Pete and a chopped up ox heart too.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on August 07, 2015, 11:21:05 am
Pretty sure.  ;D

I did a lot of cooking last weekend and froze it in batches, plus there's chicken legs for Pete and a chopped up ox heart too.

So did you murder Mr Van Vliet or are you just concealing the evidence ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: perpetual dan on August 16, 2015, 10:04:58 am
I have a voucher to spend, but really can't think of anything I want to get with it.
(I feel I ought to mostly get something I can point to and say "I got this with it", so a supply of brake blocks doesn't really work.)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on August 16, 2015, 06:06:45 pm
There's no chef's knife, cheese grater or washing machine in our holiday apartment.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on August 16, 2015, 06:10:39 pm
And there's nowhere to sit outside.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on August 18, 2015, 07:09:46 pm
Pretty sure.  ;D

I did a lot of cooking last weekend and froze it in batches, plus there's chicken legs for Pete and a chopped up ox heart too.

So did you murder Mr Van Vliet or are you just concealing the evidence ;D
She has at least got rid of his trousers!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on August 19, 2015, 08:52:40 pm
The en-suite toilet in the room of my Versailles hotel has been running noisily for hours.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tigerrr on August 21, 2015, 05:41:28 pm
The temperature gauge on my sous vide shows consistently 2 degrees over. As a result the very rare steaks came out medium rare and dinner was ruined.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on August 21, 2015, 06:04:38 pm
The button to select the desired input on my anbaric distascope works sequentially for the first n seconds after switch-on, but after that I have to use the arrow keys on the remote.  Why oh why can it not just do one or the other?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on August 21, 2015, 06:14:17 pm
Whilst cleansing myself in the shower on Saturday evening I had reason to discover that a power shower needs power as everything went dark. I had to soapily tip-toe across the bathroom and use the non-power shower above the bath. It's so weak. I don't know how people in poor countries without rainfall showers survive. It must be terrible for them, like shopping at Lidl.

One of the benefits of a combi boiler is mains pressure hot water.

Of course, modern boilers still need power for the CPU that makes them work.  :facepalm:

Likewise newfangled electrical button-operated bath taps.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on August 21, 2015, 06:18:43 pm
Ever since The Man replaced the Victorian water mains around here the water pressure went all to pot and the difference between being frozen utterly to DETH under the shower and being boiled alive is about 0.00001 degrees of cold tap rotation.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on August 21, 2015, 07:06:47 pm
Mr L needs a thermostatic shower mixer. ..
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Feanor on August 21, 2015, 08:10:17 pm
One of the benefits of a combi boiler is mains pressure hot water...

... at a rather modest flowrate.

Mains pressure in a stored HW cylinder FTW!
( google megaflo, and similar. )
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Feanor on August 21, 2015, 08:14:50 pm
Ever since The Man replaced the Victorian water mains around here the water pressure went all to pot and the difference between being frozen utterly to DETH under the shower and being boiled alive is about 0.00001 degrees of cold tap rotation.

If your shower mixer is getting mains-pressure cold on one side, and gravity-pressure HW from a loft tank on t'other side, this is never going to end well.

Even a thermostatic mixer will struggle to deal with this.
It needs re-plumbed.

Either feed both sides from the loft header tanks ( with a pump for adder vvvroom );
Or upgrade the DHW cylinder to mains pressure ( megaflo and the like ) so both sides are at mains pressure.

Oh, and as mentioned already, you could lose the HW cylinder totally, and go with a combi heat-on-demand thing, which also gives mains pressure HW.


Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on August 21, 2015, 10:39:22 pm
One of the benefits of a combi boiler is mains pressure hot water...

... at a rather modest flowrate.

It's only modest if you compare it to a...

Quote
Mains pressure in a stored HW cylinder FTW!
( google megaflo, and similar. )

Compared to a landlord-issue 7k5W electric shower, on the other hand, it's luxury.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on August 21, 2015, 11:27:15 pm
Oh, and as mentioned already, you could lose the HW cylinder totally, and go with a combi heat-on-demand thing, which also gives mains pressure HW.

It IS a combi heat-on-demand thing, and it only started playing silly buggers after the water mains were replaced.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Feanor on August 22, 2015, 11:54:39 am
Hmm, only a couple of things come to mind.

Water-mains wrangling usually introduces some crud into the supply for a while.
If the mixer is thermostatic, it's possible some crud is jamming up the works preventing it operating smoothly.

The only other thing that comes to mind is that the boiler may not be modulating correctly.
It may be just cycling on / off depending on flowrate.
Doesn't really sound like this, tho.

Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on August 22, 2015, 12:08:05 pm
The story I've heard is that Thames Water have turned down the pressure so that they can look you in the eye and say 'We're losing x-amount of water less through leaks in the system, than we were last year'.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on August 22, 2015, 02:18:18 pm
The mixer isn't thermostatic but rather a huge retro-styled metal contraption engineered by a moonlighting designer of Victorian signal boxes.  I rather like it and in any case prefer baths to showers.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mcshroom on August 22, 2015, 02:24:33 pm
The story I've heard is that Thames Water have turned down the pressure so that they can look you in the eye and say 'We're losing x-amount of water less through leaks in the system, than we were last year'.

Not a story - part of the plan, and they have even installed booster pumps for tower blocks to allow them to lower the pressure. (Ex Thames Waster employee)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on August 23, 2015, 06:32:12 pm
Whilst cleansing myself in the shower on Saturday evening I had reason to discover that a power shower needs power as everything went dark. I had to soapily tip-toe across the bathroom and use the non-power shower above the bath. It's so weak. I don't know how people in poor countries without rainfall showers survive. It must be terrible for them, like shopping at Lidl.

One of the benefits of a combi boiler is mains pressure hot water.

Of course, modern boilers still need power for the CPU that makes them work.  :facepalm:

Likewise newfangled electrical button-operated bath taps.

Such is the nature of progress (having just spent an extra hour getting home because the driver couldn't verify one of the automatic train door was correctly shut).

Our ancient boiler also won't work without electricity, but the tank of hot water does. We didn't pump both showers on the grounds I expect the pump, like all newfangled things, to die one day and take a week to fix.

But still, I'm used to the simulated rainfall of warm water which is disgustingly decadent. And a digital temperature setting and light that only comes on when the water is perfect. Anything less is slipping back into the dark ages.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tewdric on August 23, 2015, 09:55:24 pm
No lemon for my gin and tonic earlier.  I toughed it out.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on August 23, 2015, 10:13:03 pm
No lemon for my gin and tonic earlier.  I toughed it out.

Lime.  Always.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on August 26, 2015, 10:46:17 pm
I went to make a cup of tea in the kitchen next door to our office.  All the crockery and cutlery was clean and put away,  so no problem there.

I used one of the pyramidal one-cup teabags with which we are supplied,  and poured on the boiling water.  There was no welcome aroma of tea brewing.  Nothing.

I extracted the bag to find it had been manufactured with barely a shred of tealeaf inside!  Imagine my horror. :o

i was forced to get another bag out and mash it in the standing water.

Horrifying.  I may need counselling to get beyond the trauma.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: jsabine on August 26, 2015, 11:06:28 pm
I went to make a cup of tea in the kitchen next door to our office.  All the crockery and cutlery was clean and put away,  so no problem there.

I used one of the pyramidal one-cup teabags

Surely this post need have gone no further.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on August 26, 2015, 11:10:05 pm
That is not a first world problem, it is a crisis of almost existential proportions.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on August 27, 2015, 12:03:57 am
Note to self: put extra tea bags on next week's shopping list for impending visit to the Tea-Free Zone on the other side of the Atlantic.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on August 27, 2015, 06:33:21 am
The conditions in my new workplace are quite horrific.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on August 27, 2015, 07:01:05 am
That's terrible. 

I have a lump in my throat.

Is there a DEC campaign I can donate to?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on August 27, 2015, 07:42:13 am
If you like your tea where you stand the spoon and it dissolves in the tea before your very eyes, I recommend Barry's Tea.   

Otherwise a secret stash of those cheap bags of sweepings that pass for tea that you buy in Wilkinsons named after some insignificant place in the north of England should suffice...     :demon:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on August 27, 2015, 09:54:39 am
I just pulled out a nice shirt for a meeting later today and realised that I forgot to ask for it to be ironed the last time it was cleaned. Now it's all creased.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mcshroom on August 27, 2015, 10:12:46 am
If you like your tea where you stand the spoon and it dissolves in the tea before your very eyes, I recommend Barry's Tea.   

Otherwise a secret stash of those cheap bags of sweepings that pass for tea that you buy in Wilkinsons named after some insignificant place in the north of England should suffice...     :demon:

Didn't realise Wilko's were selling Lancashire Tea now. I thought it was still confined to the pound shops ;)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on August 27, 2015, 05:47:01 pm
Back on showers - there should be a special circle of hell for the people who install those showers, which are controlled by a lever which goes left and right for hot & cold, and up and down for on/off, into compact and bijjou shower cubicles (just right for you to whack with your elbows etc while in the middle of ablutions).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tim Hall on August 30, 2015, 08:54:38 am
Back on showers - there should be a special circle of hell for the people who install those showers, which are controlled by a lever which goes left and right for hot & cold, and up and down for on/off, into compact and bijjou shower cubicles (just right for you to whack with your elbows etc while in the middle of ablutions).
Add to that any water control do dah with confusing and/or illegible symbols to show hot and cold. 
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on August 31, 2015, 11:54:36 am
I saw the following on a friend's FB page and feel the need to share it.

Quote
My son discovered the latest 1st world problem at dinner time: Saving the best 'til last and then being too full to eat it
;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on August 31, 2015, 06:37:02 pm
Back on showers - there should be a special circle of hell for the people who install those showers, which are controlled by a lever which goes left and right for hot & cold, and up and down for on/off, into compact and bijjou shower cubicles (just right for you to whack with your elbows etc while in the middle of ablutions).
Add to that any water control do dah with confusing and/or illegible symbols to show hot and cold.

On the grounds that Her Highness, Princess of the Asbestos Palace and High Priestess of the Kingdom of a Poorly Executed DIY forbid me a magical computerized Japanese robo-toilet during the dark era of what has come to be known as The Refurbishment, our shower does have a digital temperature input and a on-off switch that cannot be elbow actuated. It also has an awesome blue light and, as is known, blue LEDs are better than any other colour. This is what all showers should be like.

Of course, one day it will break and electrocute me and then piss cold water over my naked twitching body while I confess to just about everything.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on August 31, 2015, 06:42:52 pm
^ I was just reading about digital shower controls and wondered why... apart from pissing money up the wall.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on August 31, 2015, 06:57:16 pm
Back on showers - there should be a special circle of hell for the people who install those showers, which are controlled by a lever which goes left and right for hot & cold, and up and down for on/off, into compact and bijjou shower cubicles (just right for you to whack with your elbows etc while in the middle of ablutions).
Add to that any water control do dah with confusing and/or illegible symbols to show hot and cold.

This includes tiny dark blue/red dots.  Small things don't have colour, especially in badly lit bathrooms!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on August 31, 2015, 07:29:42 pm
^ I was just reading about digital shower controls and wondered why... apart from pissing money up the wall.

Well, other than the power cut (when the water had a courtesy of going off before soaking me in cold), I've had a year of perfectly heated showers. No fiddling with thermostats and mixers, no mid-shower wawawaAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHH as the water erupts magma hot and then plunges to Siberian cold. Just a perfect forty-whatever degrees of rainfall. And a big blue light that lights up steady when it's safe to step and an emergency plaintive beep and flashy blue light if anything threatens the temperature by the merest fraction of a degree.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on August 31, 2015, 07:31:20 pm
On the grounds that Her Highness, Princess of the Asbestos Palace and High Priestess of the Kingdom of a Poorly Executed DIY forbid me a magical computerized Japanese robo-toilet during the dark era of what has come to be known as The Refurbishment, our shower does have a digital temperature input and a on-off switch that cannot be elbow actuated. It also has an awesome blue light and, as is known, blue LEDs are better than any other colour.

Blue LEDs are strictly old-skool, daddio.  Only my older Seagate external HDDs have such things; the most recently purchased one has a funky white illuminated strip about a centimetre long.  It's probably tinted plastic with a filament bulb from an old bike light behind it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on August 31, 2015, 07:59:53 pm
As a disciple of the Church of Cupertino, I believe I'm supposed to have disavowed the LED and accepted the purity of visual silence and having to guess whether a device is on or off by prodding it and seeing if it bites. I don't want to have risk my toesies in the shower. They're terribly sensitive thermostats. Plus we have a vintage boiler of uncertain temperament at the Asbestos Palace.

Anyway, if that blade of light starts to swish backwards and forwards you've got a first generation Cylon (if I remember my Battlestar Galactica correctly).

The downside is that I expect other showers to behave. I remember being in Africa earlier this year, in some place that had a lot of consonants but not a lot of hot water (according to the sign the water was courtesy of Scotland, so give them a hand, they've finally figured out what to do with all that rain). Anyway in the blissful few seconds of heat I opened my mouth for a celebratory gargle. Then I remembered it was African death water and had to hop around spitting it out like I was faulty fountain, while at the same time the water dropped to a temperature that suggested it was actually being pumped all the way from Kilmarnock.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on August 31, 2015, 10:22:43 pm
Tesco just delivered frozen peas instead of barakta-friendly ice cream.  Disappointing bastards.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Bledlow on September 01, 2015, 02:28:38 pm
Ever since The Man replaced the Victorian water mains around here the water pressure went all to pot and the difference between being frozen utterly to DETH under the shower and being boiled alive is about 0.00001 degrees of cold tap rotation.

If your shower mixer is getting mains-pressure cold on one side, and gravity-pressure HW from a loft tank on t'other side, this is never going to end well.

Even a thermostatic mixer will struggle to deal with this.
We have no cold water header tank. Cold is straight from the mains. Hot water is one floor up from the shower.

We are installing something which heats up the cold water as it goes.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on September 01, 2015, 09:39:34 pm
Tesco just delivered frozen peas instead of barakta-friendly ice cream.  Disappointing bastards.

Hmm, that's an interesting substitution!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on September 01, 2015, 10:03:29 pm
Google have lost their serifs.  >:( >:( >:(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on September 03, 2015, 07:10:56 am
According to the 7 am pips, my wrist watch is 7 seconds fast.   >:(
Christ!  I could have left for work too early. 
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on September 03, 2015, 09:40:29 am
The coffee shop had neither bacon nor sausages for a breakfast sandwich this morning
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Efrogwr on September 03, 2015, 05:42:57 pm
Neither Waitrose nor Tesco had buckwheat flour. How do the bastards expect me to make pancakes?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on September 03, 2015, 08:04:54 pm
All three coffeebots on my subdeck of the mothership required attention today so I had to get the turbogravitor to a higher subdeck for my caffeine fix.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: pcolbeck on September 09, 2015, 03:36:07 pm
I have run out of filters for the coffee machine and have left my Aeropress at my Mum and Dads. I may have to drink instant coffee unless I can find a cafeteria I stashed at the back of one of the cupboards.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: LEE on September 09, 2015, 05:43:15 pm
I have run out of filters for the coffee machine and have left my Aeropress at my Mum and Dads. I may have to drink instant coffee unless I can find a cafeteria I stashed at the back of one of the cupboards.

Having a cafeteria in your cupboards seems excessive.

Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: pcolbeck on September 09, 2015, 06:37:04 pm
I have run out of filters for the coffee machine and have left my Aeropress at my Mum and Dads. I may have to drink instant coffee unless I can find a cafeteria I stashed at the back of one of the cupboards.

Having a cafeteria in your cupboards seems excessive.

Damn that spellchecker:)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Diver300 on September 09, 2015, 10:49:02 pm
The pool car I had today is geared to over 3000 rpm at a true 70 mph in 5th.

Most of the time it was in 9th and turning at 1600 rpm at 70.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on September 10, 2015, 03:59:31 am
I have run out of filters for the coffee machine and have left my Aeropress at my Mum and Dads. I may have to drink instant coffee unless I can find a cafeteria I stashed at the back of one of the cupboards.

Having a cafeteria in your cupboards seems excessive.

Quite.  This place is bad enough in that the fridge, the safe and the ironing board are all concealed in the wardrobe.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on September 10, 2015, 01:16:09 pm
I have run out of filters for the coffee machine and have left my Aeropress at my Mum and Dads. I may have to drink instant coffee unless I can find a cafeteria I stashed at the back of one of the cupboards.

Having a cafeteria in your cupboards seems excessive.

Quite.  This place is bad enough in that the fridge, the safe and the ironing board are all concealed in the wardrobe...

...leaving no space for the Hugo Boss, Armani, Burberry and Gieves & Hawkes collections...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on September 10, 2015, 02:59:36 pm
I have run out of filters for the coffee machine and have left my Aeropress at my Mum and Dads. I may have to drink instant coffee unless I can find a cafeteria I stashed at the back of one of the cupboards.

Having a cafeteria in your cupboards seems excessive.

Quite.  This place is bad enough in that the fridge, the safe and the ironing board are all concealed in the wardrobe...

...leaving no space for the Hugo Boss, Armani, Burberry and Gieves & Hawkes collections...

You are conflating me with the stable lad again.

(Rummages for Paul Smith fleece and Turnbull & Asser T-shaped shirt with a picture of a machine-gun-toting badger on it)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: geraldc on September 11, 2015, 02:55:06 pm
Last week I took an Aston Martin out for a spin. It was some perk through my wife's company, I have no interest in cars, I just wanted to have a go in one. Today I received the following email from Aston Martin

"I understand that following your drive in the new DB9 GT you would like to explore possible purchase options, I therefore extend an invitation to visit our showroom on Park Lane to discuss your requirements further so we can begin to source the perfect Aston Martin for you. When would be convenient for you to visit?"

How does a fiver a week sound to you as a purchase option?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on September 11, 2015, 03:01:17 pm
Last week I took an Aston Martin out for a spin. It was some perk through my wife's company, I have no interest in cars, I just wanted to have a go in one. Today I received the following email from Aston Martin

"I understand that following your drive in the new DB9 GT you would like to explore possible purchase options, I therefore extend an invitation to visit our showroom on Park Lane to discuss your requirements further so we can begin to source the perfect Aston Martin for you. When would be convenient for you to visit?"

How does a fiver a week sound to you as a purchase option?

Please do go, but turn up on the Yuba Mundo.   ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: geraldc on September 11, 2015, 03:06:12 pm
Asking about boot mounted bike carriers for the Yuba would be a giggle...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Regulator on September 11, 2015, 03:56:46 pm
We have an Aston Martin showroom down the road.  They do make bike carriers.  I'm not sure whether they'd cope with a Yuba though...  ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on September 11, 2015, 04:34:40 pm
Reminds me of the time my wife and I, possessed by the spirit of morbid curiosity, and standing outside one of those bazillion pound filing cabinets of flats that push up like the bastard big brother of Japanese knotweed throughout London and not wanting to get any wetter than we already were, thought what the hell it's dry inside, let's find out what £3.5 million will buy us while casually dripping on the most expensive carpet possible (if you're going to drip you may as well do it in style). So we slip into role as swankbanking investors with our eye on another (yes, another, the saleswoman was practically up her ankles in a sea of drool when she heard that another, and she was already perched on heels so high that she'd probably take several seconds to hit the carpet if she tripped, and oh what a carpet, you could lose a lion in it, and it was very absorbent if you happen to be dripping wet). I work in sales so I roll big, unctuous fat lies out of my mouth all the time, giant pork buns of invention, corkers of porkers. I have no shame. I misplaced it in a bar somewhere. I think someone took it home and keeps it as a pet. It eats goldfish crackers and drinks Campari. Don't get it drunk after midnight.

So anyway, we're whisked up into a glossy elevator (not a lift, lifts are for council blocks, lifts are for pissing in, lifts are for old ladies with shopping bags) and deposited in what someone thinks is a contemporary lifestyle assembled from lateral spaces and words preceded by luxurious. A world of eye-slappingly bright white walls, everything edged with sharp chrome, every surface boasting tasteful displays of orchids that might have been plastic if plastic orchids were declared fashionable by an appropriate focus group. More lion-eating carpets. You could murder someone on those carpets with a chainsaw and not have to worry about the blood dripping on your downstairs neighbour and spoiling a dinner party. Which I find blood dripping from the ceiling always does. Every now and then they’d break up the endless polar white with a slab of black, an altar expanse of sacrificial granite worktop in the kitchen, a black (black!) toilet just like they have in merry Hell, and for some reason above the bed, a big slab of garish murder red splash back. Really, it was all very American Psycho.

Anyways, so many well-greased lies flew out of mouth (one of which wasn’t my phone number) meant that for weeks afterwards she kept calling me about my decision. In the end I told her it was a bit on the small side, and as a man I know how deflating that can be. You could hear her collapse inside and she scrunched up into a ball of a disappointment as her commision evaporated in a sudden puff of despondency. I broke her heart. Or she toppled off her heels and was falling evermore towards the carpet.

Thing was, it wasn’t actually that big. For £3.5 million I'd want to be able to drive a big car around my living room. And my balcony didn’t cost that much and rather than look at vagrants pissing up the back-end of the Tate Gallery I can watch gambolling squirrels pissing on my garage roof.

The best bit was when we were discussing my ‘summer house’ and she asked if it was in France. Yes, I nodded, it’s in France and we like to get away from the city, you know how it is, the city is so stiflingly busy in the summer. I had to do this while my wife kicked me once in the shin for each and every lie I gift wrapped and handed over. I do have a summer house, but it’s really just a small shed with a porch and it's at the top of my garden, oh about twenty five metres from my back door.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on September 12, 2015, 04:34:24 am
ian, you are a Very Bad Man Indeed and should warn people not to read Stuffs like that while eating.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on September 12, 2015, 09:37:03 am
The dial on my toaster is currently set just so that the first round, when the toaster is cold, leaves the toast slightly under-done but that the second round is marginally burnt.

That's my day ruined, then. I can't shouldn't have to live like this.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on September 12, 2015, 09:51:09 am
I feel your pain.

The PEEL HERE bit of the packaging on my smoked salmon slices didn't work and I had to use scissors to open it.  It nearly put me off my breakfast.

It's hardships like these that make you wonder if life is really worth all the anguish.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on September 12, 2015, 11:48:38 am
Amazon have had a technical issue which means my Lovefilm account hasn't been updated and the disc of series 5 of Grey's Anatomy which should have arrived on Thursday hasn't been despatched yet.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on September 13, 2015, 06:02:01 pm
Not only do I have the same room as last year - south-facing so it gets screamingly hot and the interstate is a stone's throw away - but they STILL haven't fixed the power socket next to the desk, so I have to run an extension lead across the room.  And then the housekeeping staff unplug it to hoover the place, which makes my laptop go "wibble".

AND I've just been loomed over by a mad Dutchman with a torque wrench :o
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: menthel on September 13, 2015, 06:51:06 pm
I am having trouble operating the automatic self park function on our new car.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on September 13, 2015, 10:26:19 pm
All of the above makes my afternoon of having to drive into another county to get a new string for my son's cello seem trivial
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on September 14, 2015, 09:19:36 am
Not only do I have the same room as last year - south-facing so it gets screamingly hot and the interstate is a stone's throw away - but they STILL haven't fixed the power socket next to the desk, so I have to run an extension lead across the room.  And then the housekeeping staff unplug it to hoover the place, which makes my laptop go "wibble".

AND I've just been loomed over by a mad Dutchman with a torque wrench :o

I really want to go to Battle Mountain some time.

Are all Dutchmen with torque wrenches mad?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Regulator on September 14, 2015, 10:17:57 am
Not only do I have the same room as last year - south-facing so it gets screamingly hot and the interstate is a stone's throw away - but they STILL haven't fixed the power socket next to the desk, so I have to run an extension lead across the room.  And then the housekeeping staff unplug it to hoover the place, which makes my laptop go "wibble".

AND I've just been loomed over by a mad Dutchman with a torque wrench :o

Ah - that was a night to remember in Rotterdam....
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on September 14, 2015, 11:37:31 am
Not only do I have the same room as last year - south-facing so it gets screamingly hot and the interstate is a stone's throw away - but they STILL haven't fixed the power socket next to the desk, so I have to run an extension lead across the room.  And then the housekeeping staff unplug it to hoover the place, which makes my laptop go "wibble".

AND I've just been loomed over by a mad Dutchman with a torque wrench :o

Ah - that was a night to remember in Rotterdam....
The Ski Hut?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Charlotte on September 14, 2015, 04:07:21 pm
I don't like our new washing up liquid.

(http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b187/vicechair/Washingupliq_zpsazz45rmc.jpg)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on September 14, 2015, 04:11:29 pm
Indeed. On a similar theme, there was more  deep shower trauma this morning. No licorice shower gel left, only enough mango for a single wash and even boys need two so I had to use the cherry and nettle which isn't nearly my favourite.

Fortunately there's another bottle of licorice in the cupboard so hopefully tomorrow morning won't be quite so traumatic. We're fortunate that we have someone to talk to these issues about. I hate to think what happens if you bottle it up inside.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on September 14, 2015, 05:55:04 pm
It's pretty chilly out there. I don't fancy walking to yoga, I don't want to cycle because it's at the top of a hill, and I can't drive because it's residents only parking.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on September 14, 2015, 06:02:00 pm
I don't like our new washing up liquid.

(http://i19.photobucket.com/albums/b187/vicechair/Washingupliq_zpsazz45rmc.jpg)
I should think not! Dragonfruit? Pah! Even Idris (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ivor_the_Engine#Idris_the_Dragon) didn't eat fruit!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mattc on September 14, 2015, 07:01:06 pm
Indeed. On a similar theme, there was more  deep shower trauma this morning. No licorice shower gel left, only enough mango for a single wash and even boys need two so I had to use the cherry and nettle which isn't nearly my favourite.

Fortunately there's another bottle of licorice in the cupboard so hopefully tomorrow morning won't be quite so traumatic. We're fortunate that we have someone to talk to these issues about. I hate to think what happens if you bottle it up inside.
You'd get bubbles in your farts.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on September 15, 2015, 05:12:49 am
Are all Dutchmen with torque wrenches mad?

I don't have a large enough sample size to be certain.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on September 16, 2015, 04:21:00 pm
My mousemat is all bendy and the mouse doesn't travel well on it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on September 16, 2015, 06:00:53 pm
I thought mousemats were a 20th century problem; I haven't seen one in years.

Early female mice struggled on desks with black surfaces, requiring a mousemat.  Seems entirely likely that there are plenty of those still kicking around, either due to ergonomic preferences, or organisational upgrade inertia.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jakob W on September 16, 2015, 06:09:06 pm
The meece that my current-nearly-former employer provide just don't seem to work on our desks; thankfully they're just about OK on our (hard plastic) branded mouse mats.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rafletcher on September 17, 2015, 09:43:30 am
The meece that my current-nearly-former employer provide just don't seem to work on our desks; thankfully they're just about OK on our (hard plastic) branded mouse mats.

I invested in a Logitech "dark field" cordless mouse for that very reason. Works on any surface it seems, including glass / highly shiny paper, and is nicer to hold (I got an "anatomic" Performance MX one). A single charge (via USB) lasts me a week.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on September 17, 2015, 02:21:22 pm
My brother has emailed all us siblings to announce the safe arrival of a son today.
My congratulatory response has met with an 'out of office' email from the proud father and an 'over quota' bounce from my sister.

There seems to have been some delay to my sending SMS texts to the happy parents.
Technology; don't you just love it?!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on September 24, 2015, 03:48:08 pm
The hot water thingy isn't working and neither is the kettle, so we have to walk approx 50 metres to the other hot water thingy.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on September 25, 2015, 01:30:41 am
My room in this benighted tip of an hotel is as far away from the lift as it's possible to be while remaining in the same building >:(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on September 25, 2015, 10:12:33 am
Bought some lovely heavy bread from the lovely heavy bread shop in Newcastle Emlyn.  Only trouble is, its a bugger to toast.
My method was, put in toaster, wander off to do other morning type stuff.  Come back to kitchen and push toast down again for a second cook.
Unbeknown to me, this morning Mrs B employed the probably much more Sensible strategy of turning the toaster up to 'Nuke it from space' setting.  So when I returned from the bathroom, I just pushed the toast down again and wandered of to find out where I'd put my coffee down.

Rush around opening door and windows and much flapping of tea towels at alarm.  That was much too exciting for that time of the morning.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on September 25, 2015, 12:21:41 pm
Ah, the 'student alarm clock'.  I heard that going off somewhere nearby this morning.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on September 25, 2015, 04:45:32 pm
The aroma of burned toast this morning was such that I could find the breakfast room by smell alone.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on October 21, 2015, 06:40:03 pm
I'm going to have the cold on my birthday. My bedside lamp broke this morning and Ikea can't bring me a new one til the 28th, and I have no muesli in the house so no birthday breakfast tomorrow. Bleh.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on October 22, 2015, 12:47:08 pm
I've run out of halloumi. 

Might as well be dead.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: LEE on October 22, 2015, 02:46:11 pm
I've run out of halloumi. 

Might as well be dead.

No Halloumi?

That's a Feta worse than death.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hatler on October 22, 2015, 02:48:37 pm
You'd better tread Caerphilly these next few hours.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Blade on October 22, 2015, 07:26:38 pm
Is that as Gouda's it gets?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on October 22, 2015, 07:50:26 pm
Stop laughing, cow.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: fruitcake on October 22, 2015, 08:10:13 pm
... more Sensible strategy of turning the toaster up to 'Nuke it from space' setting...
Rush around opening door and windows and much flapping of tea towels at alarm...

The aroma of burned toast this morning was such that I could find the breakfast room by smell alone.

It would appear that, unbeknownst to him, Mr Larrington is staying at Basil's house.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on October 23, 2015, 09:59:03 am
Only if Basil's house had slipped through a wossname in the space-time continuum and fetched up in Canada, where the BEARs come from.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on October 23, 2015, 10:12:21 am
*looks out of window*

As you were.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on October 23, 2015, 01:59:27 pm
The vending machine is out of order.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: menthel on October 26, 2015, 11:10:07 am
I didn't have quite enough coffee left for a whole cup at work this morning. That and I nearly forgot my towel this morning and had to cycle 2k home to get it. A man should always know where his towel is...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Efrogwr on October 26, 2015, 02:49:31 pm
I didn't have quite enough coffee left for a whole cup at work this morning. That and I nearly forgot my towel this morning and had to cycle 2k home to get it. A man should always know where his towel is...

Youshould have hitch-hiked.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: meddyg on October 27, 2015, 08:53:07 am
I've got to take my wife into St Tropez this morning...

(camping on the Cote d'Azur and we're rained off cycling...;)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: menthel on October 27, 2015, 02:54:29 pm
The RH channel on my #expensive headphones had become intermittent but after some investigation and cleaning all is well. Who knew that these ones had a detachable lead so that contacts could be cleaned???
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: madcow on October 27, 2015, 03:59:51 pm
For the second consecutive visit to the company hospitality box at Old Trafford, the catering staff have failed to provide cheese and crackers as listed on the match day menu.
E-mails have been exchanged with account manager suggesting that standards are slipping and what is the world coming to,  it wasn't like this when Ferguson was in charge etc. etc.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hatler on November 09, 2015, 06:51:56 pm
The bread machine drive spigot failed. It's under guarantee, but rather than a straight replacement, John Lewis are going to fix it. But we'll starve in the 10 working days it will take to get it back to us.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: orienteer on November 10, 2015, 01:07:56 pm
Due to the murder in West Ruislip last night, the police have closed the road for a day, causing local gridlock. This means we couldn't get to Waitrose today, and had to shop in the local Sainsburys. Oh, the ignominy!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on November 10, 2015, 02:10:12 pm
I have arranged a delivery of Mr Sainsbury's toothy comestibles for delivery to Aged Parents tomorrow morning.
They return from Foreign Climes tonight.
Email from Ma last night:

<< You have indeed!! But there is one change, please. Could the delivery be between 8 and 9? <granddaughter> has her 4th birthday party at <school> at 10.25, and the change would free us to go at the right time. Yes, I know, we might not get the Daily Telegraph, but as you know, life is hard, and we will just have to live with that. If they can’t do that time slot, anything after 13.00 is OK.
Thanks again!
Much love,
Ma.>>
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pickled Onion on November 10, 2015, 07:17:39 pm
The bread machine drive spigot failed. It's under guarantee, but rather than a straight replacement, John Lewis are going to fix it. But we'll starve in the 10 working days it will take to get it back to us.

Do they not offer a courtesy bread machine in the meantime? What is the world coming to?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on November 14, 2015, 02:30:12 pm
Best car insurance renewal quote: £188

Best car insurance renewal quote if I add my just-turned-17 son as a named driver: £498

 :sick: as a parrot
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Diver300 on November 14, 2015, 03:00:33 pm
Best car insurance renewal quote: £188

Best car insurance renewal quote if I add my just-turned-17 son as a named driver: £498

 :sick: as a parrot
Now go and see what it would cost once he has passed his test......
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on November 14, 2015, 03:32:31 pm
HOLY FUCK!!!  :o
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: DDCyclist on November 14, 2015, 04:19:25 pm
Best car insurance renewal quote: £188

Best car insurance renewal quote if I add my just-turned-17 son as a named driver: £498

 :sick: as a parrot

Best car insurance quote (just me with no claims for over 5 years): £200
Best car insurance quote (with Mrs Cyclist and her no-blame accident last year): £185 - and she won't drive my car anyway.

Mystified.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on November 14, 2015, 05:33:41 pm
Best car insurance quote (just me with no claims for over 5 years): £200
Best car insurance quote (with Mrs Cyclist and her no-blame accident last year): £185 - and she won't drive my car anyway.

Mystified.

Same here - it's about £30 more expensive for me to get car insurance on my own than with my wife as a named driver.

Car insurance is a dark art and no mistake.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: DDCyclist on November 14, 2015, 06:28:08 pm
Best car insurance quote (just me with no claims for over 5 years): £200
Best car insurance quote (with Mrs Cyclist and her no-blame accident last year): £185 - and she won't drive my car anyway.

Mystified.

Same here - it's about £30 more expensive for me to get car insurance on my own than with my wife as a named driver.

Car insurance is a dark art and no mistake.


I can't help thinking the insurance company will expect her to be in the car, whenever I'm driving, saying - in a soothing voice - "calm down now, calm down ..."
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: madcow on November 18, 2015, 08:08:57 am
On Ryanair ,this morning, woman sitting behind me :
"This seat is cold "
"I hate seat belts"
"There's not enough room for a fat bum  like mine. "
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mcshroom on November 19, 2015, 04:35:10 pm
Does a Ryanair flight count as First World?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on November 19, 2015, 07:23:01 pm
No.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: madcow on November 20, 2015, 09:29:52 am
 ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: DDCyclist on November 20, 2015, 09:54:27 am
IMO compared to a Garuda a Ryanair flight is most definitely First World.

I had the front seat on a Garuda fight from Bandung to Jakarta. The cockpit door was open and I could see, clearly, beside the captain's seat, a bank of circuit breakers with a label above them said in big bold red letters "DO NOT RESET."

As we taxied across the apron one of them kept tripping. The captain kept resetting it. When we did the take-off run down the runway he held it in with his left hand. Unfortunately I didn't have a smart-phone, then, or I'd have sent a photograph to the Indonesian aviation authority - as well as to KLM who - at the time - were providing engineering skills and knowledge. One of their seconded engineers was a lounge lizard in the hotel I later lived in.   
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on November 20, 2015, 02:32:08 pm
At least your plane had a cockpit door.  Dr Larrington was once on an internal flight in Burma, on a plane which had had one once.  She describe the antics of the crew prior to landing as "interesting".
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on November 21, 2015, 03:55:16 pm
Oi!  DWP.  Where's my bloody Winter Fuel Payment then?  I'd had it well before now last year.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: fboab on November 21, 2015, 04:39:13 pm
Quote from: No1Daughter
I like the grown up colouring books but sometimes the boxes are too small so you can't colour it in unless you've got really really good pens and that just makes it stressful rather than relaxing
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on November 21, 2015, 04:57:40 pm
Quote from: No1Daughter
I like the grown up colouring books but sometimes the boxes are too small so you can't colour it in unless you've got really really good pens and that just makes it stressful rather than relaxing
Tell her to colour outside of the boxes.
Always.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: contango on November 21, 2015, 05:00:21 pm
Best car insurance renewal quote: £188

Best car insurance renewal quote if I add my just-turned-17 son as a named driver: £498

 :sick: as a parrot

Just out of curiosity, find out what it would cost for your just-turned-17 son to insure if it were his car...

ETA: A guy I know has a son who was paying not far shy of a grand to insure a 15-year-old Nissan Micra with a massive 1.0 litre engine. I think he was 23 and had had a license for a few years.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on November 21, 2015, 05:57:08 pm
At least your plane had a cockpit door.  Dr Larrington was once on an internal flight in Burma, on a plane which had had one once.  She describe the antics of the crew prior to landing as "interesting".

Was on an internal flight in SA once. Not long before landing the pilot said that we were running a bit late but he'd be able to make the time up. After that announcement the plane dived. The cockpit door slammed open and we could see we were pointing at the ground. We landed on time.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Legs on November 24, 2015, 10:05:40 am
Middle-Class Problems:

I almost found myself muttering to Mrs Legs last night that "our dishwasher really doesn't cope very well with avocado and couscous".  :o
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Redlight on November 24, 2015, 10:13:09 am
A former colleague mentioned in an email that the recent high winds had caused great distress as they had blown his kids' trampoline into the swimming pool.

I am not sure whether he is joking or not.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on November 24, 2015, 07:37:51 pm
Oi!  DWP.  Where's my bloody Winter Fuel Payment then?  I'd had it well before now last year.
Update.
Thank you very much, UK tax payers.  Much appreciated.  As usual, I will be spending it on keeping warm.  At 1 Raddlebarn Road.   :demon:

*stands by to receive hate mail*
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jakob W on December 02, 2015, 08:37:10 am
I can't find fennel in town for love nor money, and will have to hunt for some when I go to the big city today.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on December 02, 2015, 11:33:10 pm
Oi!  DWP.  Where's my bloody Winter Fuel Payment then?  I'd had it well before now last year.
Update.
Thank you very much, UK tax payers.  Much appreciated.  As usual, I will be spending it on keeping warm.  At 1 Raddlebarn Road.   :demon:

*stands by to receive hate mail*

Excellent! I think you should invite us all round for a pint that we've already paid for.  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tigerrr on December 03, 2015, 07:24:55 am
I am stuck in the dilemma of which three bird roast to get, between ginger pig, adlington, another fancy butcher, or halve the price at M&S. Plus which three birds?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on December 04, 2015, 02:28:03 pm
Great Auk; Dodo; Passenger Pigeon.

HTH
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on December 04, 2015, 02:30:01 pm
Great Auk; Dodo; Passenger Pigeon.

HTH

They were all on offer at Waitrose the other day.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on December 04, 2015, 02:35:19 pm
Great Auk; Dodo; Passenger Pigeon.

HTH

They were all on offer at Waitrose the other day.
Meanwhile, the CTC are on offer at Sainsbury's.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on December 04, 2015, 02:49:21 pm
I am stuck in the dilemma of which three bird roast to get, between ginger pig, adlington, another fancy butcher, or halve the price at M&S. Plus which three birds?

Three-bird roasts are frightfully non-U.  Get an ostrich.  Harrods will have them.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on December 04, 2015, 03:01:46 pm
Ostrich is soooo last season!  This year, it's all about the red-necked phalarope.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Legs on December 04, 2015, 04:51:25 pm
Great Auk; Dodo; Passenger Pigeon.

HTH
pterodactyl; hakawai melvillei; night parrot
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: spesh on December 04, 2015, 06:11:05 pm
Great Auk; Dodo; Passenger Pigeon.

HTH

They were all on offer at Waitrose the other day.

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/business/waitrose-unveils-23-bird-roast-2013121782121
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rogerzilla on December 04, 2015, 07:53:42 pm
Faecebook is down for Virgin Media customers.  Some people are having to post photos of their dinners on Twitter.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: SteveC on December 04, 2015, 08:16:17 pm
Ostrich is soooo last season!  This year, it's all about the red-necked phalarope.
Would make a very small Christmas dinner though.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Efrogwr on December 05, 2015, 09:58:42 am
My chestnut pan is rusty.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on December 06, 2015, 04:13:41 pm
The battery in my tooth brush was flat this morning, so I had to operate it manually.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 06, 2015, 10:45:16 pm
The battery in my tooth brush was flat this morning, so I had to operate it manually.

I don't have the hand power to use this option.
It's find a working leccy toothbrush or furry teeth for me.

My leccy toothbrush battery is dying.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tim Hall on December 06, 2015, 10:49:57 pm
The battery in my tooth brush was flat this morning, so I had to operate it manually.

I don't have the hand power to use this option.
It's find a working leccy toothbrush or furry teeth for me.

My leccy toothbrush battery is dying.
Mine got so shagged it couldn't complete a two minute brush on one charge. I briefly toyed with following  a YouTube guide and fitting a new one but in the end  CBA. I suspect this option is out for you TAAW.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on December 06, 2015, 10:54:49 pm
Barakta has one for broadly similar reasons to hellymedic.  The flattery performs admirably well, but the lack of a supply of voles in the bathroom means it often ends up batt.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 06, 2015, 11:11:16 pm
There are no voles in our bathroom so our toothbrushes have their night on a charger in my study.
I haz a spare electric toothbrush and might get another in the post-Christmas bargainfest.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on December 06, 2015, 11:15:17 pm
In the cinema the lights didn't go down when the film started. So someone had to go out and tell the powers. They'd forgotten  ::-)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on December 06, 2015, 11:17:10 pm
There are no voles in our bathroom so our toothbrushes have their night on a charger in my study.
I haz a spare electric toothbrush and might get another in the post-Christmas bargainfest.

*lightbulb*

I've just googled and it turns out that USB powered toothbrushes are (of course!) a thing.

There's a Raspberry Pi alerting system module in the bathroom, fed by 48 vole anbarism-over-Ethernet-under-door-frame-and-along-the-badly-fitted-skirting-board™.  It could conceivably power such a thing from its spare USB port, though is in a suboptimal position, on a high shelf above the bog.


Probably easier to remind barakta to plug her toothbrush in once a week...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tim Hall on December 06, 2015, 11:31:39 pm
Presumably you could configure the Pi to issue such a reminder...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on December 08, 2015, 07:48:52 am
So-called "light"-bulby-thing in the Grand Bedchamber, plz to not be going from "useful light source" to "drugged-up glow-worm" like that.  "Drugged-up glow-worm" is of little use to a Mr Larrington who wants to read in bed, and he doesn't want to traipse around Larrington Towers at that time of night looking for a replacement either.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on December 11, 2015, 11:58:00 pm
I have too much whisky. What am I to do?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: spesh on December 12, 2015, 12:00:35 am
I have too much whisky. What am I to do?

From each according to their drinks cabinet, to each according to their tastes in single malt?  :demon:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: runsoncake on December 12, 2015, 12:24:21 am
I have too much whisky. What am I to do?

1) bury the surplus quantity

2) mail me gpx to location 1)  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Oaky on December 12, 2015, 02:23:35 am
I have too much whisky. What am I to do?

Bring more of it to Mid-Essex gatherings for safe, ethical disposal.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on December 12, 2015, 07:35:02 am
I have too much whisky. What am I to do?

<Zaphod> "That's not technically possible..."
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on December 12, 2015, 11:45:04 am
I have too much whisky.

Do we see ian complaining that he has too much gin1?  No.  No, we do not.  MTFU.

1: As far as I'm concerned any gin at all is too much, but YMMV.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on December 12, 2015, 11:47:55 am
I have too much whisky. What am I to do?

Invite us all round to help you ease your difficulties.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on December 12, 2015, 11:52:55 am
Install a swimming pool?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on December 12, 2015, 12:02:11 pm
I have too much whisky. What am I to do?

For starters, don't buy any more....
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on December 12, 2015, 12:16:56 pm
I haven't bought any this week. I did, however, win a bottle in the choir Christmas raffle on Tues. Johnny Walker 12yo blended...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on December 12, 2015, 04:07:31 pm
I share the pain, the downside of owning two over-stuffed gin cupboards, is the choosing. Sometimes I buy a new gin just to avoid the decision.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on December 12, 2015, 10:05:55 pm
I cannot find juniper berries in any of my local supermarkets, not good enough!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ElyDave on December 12, 2015, 10:20:52 pm
I have too much whisky. What am I to do?

Is there such a thing?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: jsabine on December 12, 2015, 11:54:52 pm
Having used, so far, only half of the sloes I picked to create my first ever stab at sloe gin, I am faced with the quandary of which four litres of spirit I should purchase to macerate the rest. I'm minded to only do half as gin, with perhaps a litre of rum and one of whisky for the sake of variety¦experimentation.

Um, sake?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pingu on December 13, 2015, 12:41:30 am
I haven't bought any this week. I did, however, win a bottle in the choir Christmas raffle on Tues. Johnny Walker 12yo blended...

Aw - better luck next time.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: runsoncake on December 13, 2015, 01:14:28 am
Having used, so far, only half of the sloes I picked to create my first ever stab at sloe gin, I am faced with the quandary of which four litres of spirit I should purchase to macerate the rest. I'm minded to only do half as gin, with perhaps a litre of rum and one of whisky for the sake of variety¦experimentation.

Um, sake?
Sloe vodka is ace, prefer it to gin but that's just my palate, not sure about sake as low alcohol content may not allow full maceration of the fruit.  (prepares to be shot down in flames)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: menthel on December 15, 2015, 11:59:15 am
I broke the Le Creuset pie dish this morning when getting the slow cooker out! It is so important I have had to order another from amazon immediately.

Still, the pie bird is intact.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mcshroom on December 15, 2015, 02:21:34 pm
I'm going to have get a replacement butter dish as the incumbent dish's lid catches on the sides of full blocks of butter.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tim Hall on December 18, 2015, 11:58:21 am
My glass of Laphroaig, that the waitress brought me last night, had three lumps of ice in it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ham on December 18, 2015, 07:13:21 pm
You have perfectly articulated the argument for open carry in UK restaurants.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Feanor on December 18, 2015, 07:17:40 pm
Ah, yes. That happens quite often.
Even in places that should know better, being as they are but a modest bike ride from the distilleries of Speyside.
(Yes, I know Laphroaig is not a Speyside.)

Remove them one at a time with your fingers, place in mouth and sook them, then discard them.
Clamp glass firmly between warm hands / thighs / whatever comes to hand :-)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on December 18, 2015, 07:27:26 pm
You have perfectly articulated the argument for open carry in UK restaurants.

 ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 20, 2015, 12:56:31 pm
The 'seasonal' milk bottle tops have already finished.
And it's not even Christmas yet!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on December 20, 2015, 03:08:27 pm
Outlets are being very quick to clear the xmas tat this year. Had a tree lights failure yesterday and only just managed to get hold of some.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: SteveC on December 20, 2015, 04:02:08 pm
MrsC decided we needed another light-thing to go in the window. Very little available.
Must make a note to go and look in early November next year (I know (https://yacf.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=94226.0))
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on December 20, 2015, 04:13:50 pm
MrsC decided we needed another light-thing to go in the window. Very little available.
Must make a note to go and look in early November next year (I know (https://yacf.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=94226.0))

WHSmith in Darlo have got masses of tat left.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on December 22, 2015, 02:09:38 pm
I didn't realise until I unwrapped one that the chocolate coins in the office are white "chocolate" and once I'd unwrapped it, I had to eat it.  :sick:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Morat on December 22, 2015, 03:58:18 pm
I've found that watching Amazon Prime on my phone seems to fail after a couple of episodes of whatever box set I'm watching. Only on my home WiFi which is perfect in every other way. Only a reboot will cure it, which means my viewing is interupted for at least 2 minutes every 90.
How is one meant to cope with that?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: tiermat on December 22, 2015, 04:25:59 pm
MrsC decided we needed another light-thing to go in the window. Very little available.
Must make a note to go and look in early November next year (I know (https://yacf.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=94226.0))

WHSmith in Darlo have got masses of tat left.

Sainsburys in NTR were relocating their tat, ready for reducing, today. I need to out and about early tomorrow so might just pop along to see if I can stock up on cards, wrap and crackers.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ElyDave on December 22, 2015, 05:19:13 pm
We broke our salt mill yesterday. Now need to resort to a small bowl of the stuff.

Oh the humanity
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: SoreTween on December 23, 2015, 11:51:32 am
This years roasting chestnuts have reached a new level of awful.  Ever since the over sized under flavored chinese rubbish came on the scene it's been hard to enjoy a good roasted nut.  This year they have the texture of soap and much the flavour too.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: trekker12 on December 23, 2015, 12:27:11 pm
Pick your own, we do from the alley we commute down on the way home, saddle bags full of free chestnuts. They don't last till Christmas though which is my FWP
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on December 23, 2015, 05:50:35 pm
As I don't much like or eat chocolate, Christmas has now gifted me about fifteen kilos of the stuff, two bottles of red wine, and one solitary bottle of gin.

The Smiths were right, the world won't listen. The ratio is wrong.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on December 23, 2015, 05:57:02 pm
As I don't much like or eat chocolate, Christmas has now gifted me about fifteen kilos of the stuff, two bottles of red wine, and one solitary bottle of gin.

The Smiths were right, the world won't listen. The ratio is wrong.

I'm sure any number of forumites would gladly relieve you of your problem.  I'll make the sacrifice and take at least a kilo of chocolate and one bottle of red off your hands, because I'm nice like that.  O:-)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ElyDave on December 23, 2015, 06:14:48 pm
As I don't much like or eat chocolate, Christmas has now gifted me about fifteen kilos of the stuff, two bottles of red wine, and one solitary bottle of gin.

The Smiths were right, the world won't listen. The ratio is wrong.

I'm sure any number of forumites would gladly relieve you of your problem.  I'll make the sacrifice and take at least a kilo of chocolate and one bottle of red off your hands, because I'm nice like that.  O:-)

I'll throw myself under the other bottle of red and any chocolate over 80% cocoa, have to watch the sugars you know :P
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rafletcher on December 25, 2015, 03:36:40 pm
I really don't like this years Pannetone, it's got icing on  :-X
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on December 25, 2015, 03:57:38 pm
Our internets is down.  We might have to talk to each other!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on December 25, 2015, 04:16:29 pm
As I don't much like or eat chocolate, Christmas has now gifted me about fifteen kilos of the stuff, two bottles of red wine, and one solitary bottle of gin.

The Smiths were right, the world won't listen. The ratio is wrong.

Depending upon the chocolate, I might be happy to trade you gin for it.    :D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on December 25, 2015, 04:16:57 pm
Hmmm.   Cream sherry or port...   
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on December 25, 2015, 05:31:51 pm
Good thing Santa1 was delivering port and cheesy comestibles to Lt. Col. Larrington (retd.) rather than me.

1: Thinly disguised as Mrs Neighbour and Small Daughter
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: tiermat on December 25, 2015, 05:34:17 pm
Hmmm.   Cream sherry or port...

Port, of course, cream sherry is an abomination!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Efrogwr on December 25, 2015, 07:07:40 pm
Prosecco has gone up to €2.29 a bottle.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on December 26, 2015, 11:31:53 am
This panetonne is too crumbly to slice easily.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tewdric on December 26, 2015, 11:56:10 am
The magnum of St Emilion Grand Cru we decanted yesterday morning was so delicious that half of it was gone by the time the food was on the table and we had to finish dinner with an inferior 78 Pauillac.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Efrogwr on December 26, 2015, 12:05:33 pm
This panetonne is too crumbly to slice easily.

We are having the same trouble with pancotta.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: fboab on December 26, 2015, 01:01:35 pm
Someone else has eaten my favourite Thornton from the Continentals. It was only a single layer box.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: red marley on December 26, 2015, 04:49:53 pm
This panetonne is too crumbly to slice easily.

We are having the same trouble with pancotta.

Crumbly panna cotta? Have you checked the use-by date?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Gattopardo on December 26, 2015, 07:40:16 pm
My xbox 360 no longer has video.  Which is quite annoying as I'm in France and it was trapped in the house entertainment.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on December 28, 2015, 08:30:43 am
My ex-cleaner just posted on Facebook that she desperately needs to have her mink coat taken in. And can anyone recommend somewhere to have it done.

No I'm not joking,  And neither is she.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on December 30, 2015, 08:28:20 pm
The local Co-op is closing for a weeks refurbishment,    I may have to get stuff from Tesco  :o  What will the neighbours think..?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on December 30, 2015, 08:50:45 pm
My ex-cleaner just posted on Facebook that she desperately needs to have her mink coat taken in. And can anyone recommend somewhere to have it done.

No I'm not joking,  And neither is she.

Do you need a new cleaner?  On those wages, I think I can manage to come up from London.   ;)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: arabella on December 30, 2015, 09:31:57 pm
The cat has knocked over the ps2 (play station 2).
It doesn't work any more.  The disk something has stopt working, the config stuf is still fine.  ie it's now useless. sob.
either that or I have to pretend I know what I am doing and try to mend it (ha ha ha ha ha)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jakob W on January 02, 2016, 09:29:04 am
My local supermarket finally had some fennel, but it was tough and not very flavoursome.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mattc on January 02, 2016, 10:04:39 am
The cat has knocked over the ps2 (play station 2).
It doesn't work any more.  The disk something has stopt working, the config stuf is still fine.  ie it's now useless. sob.
either that or I have to pretend I know what I am doing and try to mend it (ha ha ha ha ha)
In the style of that Jack Black movie, you could re-enact classic games. I'm sure the boys would join in once they get the idea.

Thus bringing back elements of wonderful christmas past leveraging modern youth interests.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on January 02, 2016, 12:31:55 pm
Playstation 2 probably counts as classic games to today's yoof.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on January 02, 2016, 12:34:37 pm
Lt. Col. Larrington (retd.) has a PS2.  'nuff said.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on January 02, 2016, 12:35:30 pm
I still think of PS2 as a keyboard connector, made popular by the mega-global big iron corporation of Armonk, USAnia's desktop PC of the same name.  </old_fart>
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on January 02, 2016, 12:39:30 pm
So do I.  Something to do with the Model M (formerly attached to a genuine PS/2) six inches from my right foot.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on January 02, 2016, 01:40:56 pm
ISTR that the IBM PS2 was a rather-better-than-most babbage engine from the 1980s.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on January 02, 2016, 03:12:02 pm
It was certainly solid enough to survive a nuclear war.  The police didn't use them because they were too heavy to beat suspects over the head with.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on January 15, 2016, 09:25:31 am
Next week I'm going to a mothership shindig in Florida. Every evening there's a free bar till 2am. Consulting my calendar, it seems every morning someone has scheduled a breakfast meeting with me at 7am. I'm no good at 7am when I've nothing stronger than a cup of tea the evening before.

Breakfast meetings. What kind of diabolical magics are these?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mcshroom on January 15, 2016, 12:19:30 pm
Decisions decisions. Tomorrow is forecast to be wind free and sunny, but I just can't decide whether to go for a long bike ride (on studded tyres) or to go fell walking in the snow.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on January 15, 2016, 12:26:34 pm
Next week I'm going to a mothership shindig in Florida. Every evening there's a free bar till 2am. Consulting my calendar, it seems every morning someone has scheduled a breakfast meeting with me at 7am. I'm no good at 7am when I've nothing stronger than a cup of tea the evening before.

Breakfast meetings. What kind of diabolical magics are these?

Just assume that they meant UK time. I'm sure that, like me, you've suffered enough from leftpondians who don't understand the concept of time zones that you deserve some kind of payback
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: TimC on January 15, 2016, 12:47:43 pm
Next week I'm going to a mothership shindig in Florida. Every evening there's a free bar till 2am. Consulting my calendar, it seems every morning someone has scheduled a breakfast meeting with me at 7am. I'm no good at 7am when I've nothing stronger than a cup of tea the evening before.

Breakfast meetings. What kind of diabolical magics are these?

Just assume that they meant UK time. I'm sure that, like me, you've suffered enough from leftpondians who don't understand the concept of time zones that you deserve some kind of payback

UK time? So you start the 7am (UK) meeting as the free bar closes? That'll go well...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on January 15, 2016, 12:52:26 pm
Next week I'm going to a mothership shindig in Florida. Every evening there's a free bar till 2am. Consulting my calendar, it seems every morning someone has scheduled a breakfast meeting with me at 7am. I'm no good at 7am when I've nothing stronger than a cup of tea the evening before.

Breakfast meetings. What kind of diabolical magics are these?

Just assume that they meant UK time. I'm sure that, like me, you've suffered enough from leftpondians who don't understand the concept of time zones that you deserve some kind of payback

UK time? So you start the 7am (UK) meeting as the free bar closes? That'll go well...

Precisely ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on January 15, 2016, 03:45:43 pm
I was told yesterday that regular consumption of green tea encourages gout and kidney stones. PG tips anyone?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on January 16, 2016, 12:58:07 pm
Tesco no longer sell tinned apricots in juice, only in syrup.  >:(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on January 16, 2016, 01:41:58 pm
Mr. Sainsbury's emporium of toothsome comestibles has ceased being just that from the moment they desisted vending prawn spring rolls.
I had some last weekend.
They are no longer available.
Beaucoup merde.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: menthel on January 19, 2016, 10:16:19 am
My socks were cold after my commute in this morning. And when I put my phone in my pocket I found that this was even colder!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on January 19, 2016, 01:54:49 pm
Standing on the beach last night with a cooling beer, I was forced to put on a light jacket to defeat the mild chill from the gentle sea breeze.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: DDCyclist on January 19, 2016, 03:45:23 pm
Cornish daffodils/narcissi. Mrs C's mum sends them to Mrs C every birthday, and sometimes other occasions.

Is it just me, or do they have a petro-chemical smell? Do they provoke a monster headache whenever they're around?

I daren't ask Mrs C's mum to stop sending them. She hates me so she'll only send more.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on January 19, 2016, 07:28:04 pm
Then reverse psychology is your friend. Tell her how much joy like them and she'll stop.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: asterix on January 20, 2016, 06:39:45 pm
Finding out that climbing Everest can actually kill you.  And your Sherpa.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ElyDave on January 23, 2016, 12:10:07 am
Just heard someone on the beeb complaining about the snow in USania " there was no organic milk"
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: DDCyclist on January 23, 2016, 09:15:54 am
Just heard someone on the beeb complaining about the snow in USania " there was no organic milk"

Also, presumably from someone visiting the area: "I don't have any clothing with me so I'm wearing the same thing I wore yesterday and will probably have the same thing happening tonight."

Not to mention: "I'm coming out (of a stripped grocery store) empty handed so I'll just have to make do with what I've got in my refrigerator."
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on January 23, 2016, 01:51:22 pm
Just heard someone on the beeb complaining about the snow in USania " there was no organic milk"

Reminds me of my cousin's blog from Phuket one December.

Having very narrowly escaped the Boxing Day Tsunami, a fellow hotel guest bemoaned the lack of marmalade for breakfast...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on January 23, 2016, 02:40:58 pm
Just heard someone on the beeb complaining about the snow in USania " there was no organic milk"

Once upon a time, I staggered through a US snowstorm during a power outage to get some supplies from the local gas station. They wouldn't sell me anything because the tills wouldn't work. I think I finally negotiated a purchase on the grounds that what they had in the freezers would go off (they could have put it outside, of course, it was about -15) and I'd do the math for them.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on January 23, 2016, 08:36:21 pm
Last year the gin selection in Geneva duty free was amazeballs, today it was shit. I didn't buy any :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on January 23, 2016, 09:01:01 pm
Miami duty free also disappointed.

I grabbed a bottle of Citadelle gun because it was a modestly cheap (and I'm trying to deplete an old US bank account) and I thought I was running out. Turns out I didn't have even have Citadelle (hell, I should catalogue the cupboards), I have a Citadelle Oak-aged gin, so inadvertent score for me.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on January 23, 2016, 10:27:40 pm
Just heard someone on the beeb complaining about the snow in USania " there was no organic milk"

I noticed this too, and nearly spilled me tea!

Miami duty free also disappointed.

I grabbed a bottle of Citadelle gun because it was a modestly cheap (and I'm trying to deplete an old US bank account) and I thought I was running out. Turns out I didn't have even have Citadelle (hell, I should catalogue the cupboards), I have a Citadelle Oak-aged gin, so inadvertent score for me.

Get on to the people responsible for the Bookcrawler app and see if they'll adapt it for Gin?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rafletcher on January 25, 2016, 01:57:21 pm
I'm STILL waiting for my car to be returned from the accident repairers - they have to get the rear view parking camera re-calibrated.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: clarion on January 25, 2016, 02:15:24 pm
Miami duty free also disappointed.

I grabbed a bottle of Citadelle gun because it was a modestly cheap (and I'm trying to deplete an old US bank account) and I thought I was running out. Turns out I didn't have even have Citadelle (hell, I should catalogue the cupboards), I have a Citadelle Oak-aged gin, so inadvertent score for me.

Guns in Duty Free?  I guess it is Florida...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on January 25, 2016, 02:37:33 pm
Nah that will be Texas. I was sitting in the San Antonio airport bar last year marvelling at the big sign on the wall forbidding the carrying of firearms (openly or concealed) on their premises. I felt a lot safer.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: fboab on January 25, 2016, 07:27:19 pm
I'm doing Dry January so heading for SUGAR in lieu of alcomahol, but the only ice cream in the house is Karamel Sutra Core and I don't like that very much.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rr on January 26, 2016, 01:20:13 pm
I just filled the panda from the red to full, the price of diesel is now so low the the total was below the £30 contactless limit. The petrol station didn't do contactless payment. I had to delay for 20 seconds to do chip and pin.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tigerrr on January 26, 2016, 01:46:32 pm
Someone at the Gym keeps organising the spin bikes so they interlock and it takes quite an effort to get ones bike out. Combined with the lady swimmers who seem incapable of doing their 'swimming' in a straight line it is enough to make one want to just give up.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Graeme on January 28, 2016, 04:14:50 pm
How do I water an Air Bonsai (https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1280002828/air-bonsai-create-your-little-star)?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on February 02, 2016, 12:35:38 pm
We woke up before the alarm, so it didn't get to play Sonny & Cher at us.  As such, I didn't realise it was groundhog day until lunch time.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Nuncio on February 02, 2016, 01:25:51 pm
"Cummerbund - Yes or No?". Does this count?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on February 02, 2016, 01:35:42 pm
"Cummerbund - Yes or No?". Does this count?

I thought all threads here were covered under a blanket ruling ;-)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Nuncio on February 02, 2016, 01:38:41 pm
Apologies then. It was just that my unread threads list read:

Cummerbund - Yes or No?
First-World Problems.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: menthel on February 02, 2016, 02:23:05 pm
I had to buy a new pair of Loake boots so that I had something to wear whilst my Church's are off for an 8 week holiday to get fixed. Very annoying.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mattc on February 02, 2016, 03:01:07 pm
We woke up before the alarm, so it didn't get to play Sonny & Cher at us.  As such, I didn't realise it was groundhog day until lunch time.
I'm sure this is OT, but I have to share it anyway:

I actually turned on the radio this morning and got the Sonny & Cher record. I had an early start, it was still dark, and this confused me a lot. I wouldn't have realised it was Groundhog Day if you hadn't posted!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: trekker12 on February 02, 2016, 03:54:19 pm
Chris Evans on R2 had a psychologist who had fixed his life as a result of the lessons from Groundhog day (well he's written a book which presumably fixed his life) and completely missed the opportunity to play Sonny and Cher afterwards
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on February 02, 2016, 05:11:00 pm
Chris Evans on R2 had a psychologist who had fixed his life as a result of the lessons from Groundhog day (well he's written a book which presumably fixed his life) and completely missed the opportunity to play Sonny and Cher afterwards

Sky movies Comedy (308) have won this one:  http://tv.sky.com/tv-guide

(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on February 02, 2016, 07:52:46 pm
Mum (79.95) is overseas and trying to edit document on her computer.
I fail to instruct her successfully over the phone.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on February 03, 2016, 08:34:44 am
Running three simultaneous full system backups to the same NAS appears to slow things down to the speed of the Slow Children after they've been fed performance-disenhancing drugs.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: LEE on February 08, 2016, 02:07:55 pm
Aren't Heart Rate Monitor chest straps cold when you first put them on?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: menthel on February 08, 2016, 02:41:22 pm
I tweeted a picture of a bittern that I had taken that is now sending my twitter account bonkers and I can't find out how to turn off alerts!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on February 08, 2016, 02:49:12 pm
You won't do that again, will you? Once bittern, twice shy.



The shiny black cloak with the fake fur collar, please.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: menthel on February 08, 2016, 02:50:24 pm
You won't do that again, will you? Once bittern, twice shy.



The shiny black cloak with the fake fur collar, please.

Oh my... ;)

All that's left is a slightly moth-eaten looking parka with half the fur missing from round the hood I am afraid...  :P
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Gus on February 08, 2016, 05:46:32 pm
the last piece of my baguette was stale  :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on February 08, 2016, 05:57:18 pm
You should have eaten it faster  ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Legs on February 09, 2016, 12:15:57 pm
No matter how subtly I hint that my coffee be made "weak and milky", our admin lady always makes it so that the spoon stands upright.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: pcolbeck on February 09, 2016, 12:22:56 pm
I have just had a delivery of coffee from York Coffee Emporium. Can't decide which one to open and try first.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ham on February 09, 2016, 12:24:57 pm
Make it weak and milky and it won't matter  :demon:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Legs on February 09, 2016, 12:36:08 pm
I don't actually want it weak or milky - just relatively so!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: HTFB on February 09, 2016, 12:40:10 pm
You won't do that again, will you? Once bittern, twice shy.

The shiny black cloak with the fake fur collar, please.
Boom, boom (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ky5IYXhraMg)!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on February 09, 2016, 12:50:52 pm
A colleague brought in Scotch pancakes and raspberry jam, but the "raspberry jam" is a seedless jelly.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: LEE on February 09, 2016, 03:18:04 pm
No matter how subtly I hint that my coffee be made "weak and milky", our admin lady always makes it so that the spoon stands upright.

Quite right too.  "Weak & Milky Coffee" ??  Lucky the Admin lady doesn't spank you just for asking.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Legs on February 09, 2016, 04:45:04 pm
No matter how subtly I hint that my coffee be made "weak and milky", our admin lady always makes it so that the spoon stands upright.
Quite right too.  "Weak & Milky Coffee" ??  Lucky the Admin lady doesn't spank you just for asking.
Whoa, before the Coffee Brigade start rounding on me as if I'm some kind of Philistine, I just want to make it clear that I just wanted something like this 
(https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/be/Coffee_cup.JPG)
and not something like this
(http://coffeepodextras.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/KencoMedium-Roast2.png)
(not that I'd really mind a spanking from her  :demon:)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on February 09, 2016, 06:07:40 pm
Marks and Spencer didn't have any blocks of Red Leicester. I had to buy sliced instead.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on February 11, 2016, 05:59:49 pm
I'm a bit nervous because I'm going to a different yoga class tonight for the first time.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: menthel on February 11, 2016, 06:50:34 pm
I'm a bit nervous because I'm going to a different yoga class tonight for the first time.

I am in a much worse situation- I am having my first ever banjo lesson!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: HTFB on February 11, 2016, 06:57:48 pm
I am in a much worse situation- I am having my first ever banjo lesson!
And you think that's bad for you?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: menthel on February 11, 2016, 08:42:46 pm
I am in a much worse situation- I am having my first ever banjo lesson!
And you think that's bad for you?

At least it's not the fiddle or trumpet!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on February 11, 2016, 09:34:31 pm
I'm a bit nervous because I'm going to a different yoga class tonight for the first time.

I am in a much worse situation- I am having my first ever banjo lesson!

So many banjo jokes, so little time... ;)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on February 12, 2016, 01:00:47 am
I am in a much worse situation- I am having my first ever banjo lesson!
And you think that's bad for you?

At least it's not the fiddle or trumpet!

Or the bagpipes...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on February 12, 2016, 10:35:36 am
08:00 and the Cinnabon at Bond Street Station was still shut.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: MagnusOpus on February 12, 2016, 12:39:32 pm
So slow at work today I've ended up posting a bunch of rubbish on YACF
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on February 12, 2016, 03:39:00 pm
So slow at work today I've ended up posting a bunch of rubbish on YACF

And this is a problem how, exactly?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: MagnusOpus on February 12, 2016, 03:48:15 pm
So slow at work today I've ended up posting a bunch of rubbish on YACF

And this is a problem how, exactly?

Ummm....because I'm one of of your suppliers....don't tell Alan!  ;)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: epa611 on February 12, 2016, 09:09:53 pm
Need to buy a new dishwasher and the Miele G6512 will take 3 days to get here! We're going to have to wash dishes by hand  :o. The cleaner was in today - should have got her to do some  :-\
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on February 12, 2016, 09:17:00 pm
It's Friday, so I treated myself to some nice Rioja,  but I smashed the last of my good red wine glasses last week (and have been too busy lazy to get the spares out of the loft.) 

I'm having to drink it out of one of the chunky recycled green glass goblets I use for white....  :o
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on February 12, 2016, 09:29:58 pm
It's Friday, so I treated myself to some nice Rioja,  but I smashed the last of my good red wine glasses last week (and have been too busy lazy to get the spares out of the loft.) 

I'm having to drink it out of one of the chunky recycled green glass goblets I use for white....  :o

I feel your pain.  This was from my cry from the heart posted elsewhere, as I was returning from Glasgow back in July 2015...
Quote
What barbaric service on this train - my wine has been served in a water glass!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: fboab on February 12, 2016, 09:40:20 pm
I got a parcel of a free gift from Brooks but it's not another test saddle, it's ugly bar tape I don't want and won't use.
(http://i952.photobucket.com/albums/ae7/fboab/20160211_211449.jpg)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Deano on February 12, 2016, 11:30:11 pm
Flog it for a tenner and donate it to charidee.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: cygnet on February 13, 2016, 08:34:31 am
First world maths problem:
(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Br43bgpIYAEdHb3.jpg:large)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on February 13, 2016, 08:40:21 am
Marks and Spencer didn't have any blocks of Red Leicester. I had to buy sliced instead.

Should have gone to Aldi.   :o
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rr on February 13, 2016, 08:40:50 am
First world maths problem:
(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Br43bgpIYAEdHb3.jpg:large)
Humus without extra virgin olive oil, yuck!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on February 13, 2016, 09:28:15 am
And no Tahini!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on February 13, 2016, 10:16:45 am
And that tick is back to front!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Bledlow on February 13, 2016, 11:26:02 am
What is 'hummus dip' & how does it differ from hummus?

Is it something to do with 'chai tea'?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on February 13, 2016, 12:33:48 pm
And that tick is back to front!

Left-handed teacher?

I am right-handed but it strikes me that making a tick is a very highly unnatural movement for a left-hander, more than normal writing.

Any lefties care to comment?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: HTFB on February 13, 2016, 12:35:14 pm
And that tick is back to front!
Not for a left-hander it isn't. And as ane fule kno, left-handers are best at sums. Look at sigismund arbuthnot the mad maths master. he hav a cane that land accross rong side of fearless BOYS tender backside hem-hem.

(Hellymedic beat me to the draw. The movement isn't that unnatural as we're well trained in pen-pushing. If you're ticking off a list, though, it's much better to tick on the left side of the page so your hand doesn't block what you're reading as you go along, and then the left-handed tick is very much easier.)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on February 13, 2016, 12:59:30 pm
HTFB has written what I was going to say.
I used a left hand tick for years and ignored any comments from others about it.
My brother, who was a head teacher at the time, wouldn't accept my opinion that a left handed tick was valid, asking me if I used a left handed b, for instance.
Since then I try to use right handed ticks when completing forms by hand.
Other than that I don't care what others think of my left handed tick.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: CAMRAMan on February 13, 2016, 01:00:25 pm
The finches keep eating my sunflower hearts and I have to fill up the feeders every other day in this weather.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on February 13, 2016, 02:42:40 pm
I *am* a lefty,  actually, and I can tick the usual way.

Having said that, I'm not a lefty who is so lefty I can barely function in a right handed world....
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on February 13, 2016, 03:42:18 pm
Left-handed tick makes perfect sense to me, as long as the context is unambiguous (best to avoid it where it's going to be OCRed, scrutinised by pedants, or could be mistaken for a backslash).

(I'm a righty, so it's academic.)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Auntie Helen on February 14, 2016, 08:14:31 am
And that tick is back to front!

Left-handed teacher?

I am right-handed but it strikes me that making a tick is a very highly unnatural movement for a left-hander, more than normal writing.

Any lefties care to comment?
Germans all seem to do their ticks back to front, and often on the wrong side of the paper. It's very weird!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on February 14, 2016, 04:34:04 pm
Forgot to buy lemons for my home made dip for my work packed lunch, alas!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: contango on February 15, 2016, 05:35:26 am
I just bought a new case of beer but there's so much beer already in the chiller I can't fit any of it in.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: nicknack on February 15, 2016, 11:09:46 am
I just bought a new case of beer but there's so much beer already in the chiller I can't fit any of it in.
There's plenty of room in mine if you're really stuck.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: MagnusOpus on February 15, 2016, 11:28:04 am
Did this get posted here yet?

https://www.facebook.com/overheardinwaitrose/

including such gems as.....

"Sebastian stop hitting your sister, or you won’t get any Brioche!" and

"Luciano behave! Children these days... I blame the au pairs."

Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on February 15, 2016, 12:16:16 pm
I think I posted something about Highgate mothers...

ETA I did. Linky reposted.

Enjoy!

https://www.handpicked.org/best_of_highgatemums (https://www.handpicked.org/best_of_highgatemums)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on February 15, 2016, 02:11:24 pm
First world maths problem:
(https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Br43bgpIYAEdHb3.jpg:large)
Humus without extra virgin olive oil, yuck!

I see that's in the 'Highgate Mums' page...

https://www.handpicked.org/best_of_highgatemums (https://www.handpicked.org/best_of_highgatemums)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: cygnet on February 16, 2016, 12:03:08 am
Lots of FWP there for the taking, but ^ stood out!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pickled Onion on February 16, 2016, 12:12:03 pm
And no Tahini!

It sounds grim - 6 cups of water to 2 of chick peas, surely that would be a watery soup not any kind of "dip"? And no tahini or salt?

And surely a USA cup is a measuring cup and not at all the same as a teacup? I call fake.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: fboab on February 16, 2016, 04:35:39 pm
That's about right for dried chickpeas, surely.
You'd need to soak them for days mind.

The point about cups as a measuring device is built in proportionality. You can use any cup.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on February 16, 2016, 04:38:33 pm
The point about cups as a measuring device is built in proportionality. You can use any cup.

Until they start mixing units, eg. "cloves".  But you're always going to risk Mars Climate Orbiter problems with recipes unless you apply common sense or count everything out in moles.

We got a tame USAnian to buy us a set of measuring cups.  Handy things to have.  More useful than chickpeas, anyway.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on February 16, 2016, 05:10:34 pm
That's about right for dried chickpeas, surely.
You'd need to soak and boil them for days mind.

The point about cups as a measuring device is built in proportionality. You can use any cup.

FTFY...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: SteveC on February 16, 2016, 06:21:57 pm
'Cup' in recipes is a standard measure.

In the US it's 8 fluid ounces (so half of one of their pints) (note for the pedantic, the US fl.oz. is not quite the same as an Imperial one)
In New Zealand it's 250ml.

(Mr Google says the US cup is 236.59ml)

Cue the 'nice thing about standards quote'
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on February 16, 2016, 06:36:09 pm
'Cup' in recipes is a standard measure.


Surely it depends on who's bra you are borrowing to do the measuring?

*leaves thread in disgrace*
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on February 16, 2016, 09:42:06 pm
'Cup' in recipes is a standard measure.

In the US it's 8 fluid ounces (so half of one of their pints) (note for the pedantic, the US fl.oz. is not quite the same as an Imperial one)
In New Zealand it's 250ml.

(Mr Google says the US cup is 236.59ml)

Cue the 'nice thing about standards quote'
It's still a stupid unit for solids though. Half a cup of grated carrot? Packed down firm? Left loose and airy? Chopped carrot jammed into the measuring cup and then grated?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: SteveC on February 16, 2016, 09:46:34 pm
It's still a stupid unit for solids though. Half a cup of grated carrot? Packed down firm? Left loose and airy? Chopped carrot jammed into the measuring cup and then grated?

I don't disagree. I do use cup measures as I have several American cookbooks but it is a pain.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on February 16, 2016, 09:56:35 pm
I much prefer cups.  Not many recipes require absolute accuracy.  If you're the sort of cook who 'bungs stuff in the bowl' rather than measuring everything to the nth degree and garnishing stuff, cups are good.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on February 16, 2016, 10:08:04 pm
I much prefer cups.  Not many recipes require absolute accuracy.  If you're the sort of cook who 'bungs stuff in the bowl' rather than measuring everything to the nth degree and garnishing stuff, cups are good.

It's a good thing Heston Blumenthing won't be in charge of the Revolution :D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: contango on February 17, 2016, 04:45:22 am
'Cup' in recipes is a standard measure.

In the US it's 8 fluid ounces (so half of one of their pints) (note for the pedantic, the US fl.oz. is not quite the same as an Imperial one)
In New Zealand it's 250ml.

(Mr Google says the US cup is 236.59ml)

Cue the 'nice thing about standards quote'
It's still a stupid unit for solids though. Half a cup of grated carrot? Packed down firm? Left loose and airy? Chopped carrot jammed into the measuring cup and then grated?

No more useless than dietary guidelines that use really useful and objective measures like "a large handful" or "a small portion".
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on February 17, 2016, 08:13:47 am
I tick both ways.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: perpetual dan on February 17, 2016, 01:04:27 pm
I much prefer cups.  Not many recipes require absolute accuracy.  If you're the sort of cook who 'bungs stuff in the bowl' rather than measuring everything to the nth degree and garnishing stuff, cups are good.

For that sort of cooking I prefer the metric "handful". Less washing up too.
(Our new bread machine's recipe book measures in cups and spoons, water first then flour obv. I'd mind less if the bread ever rose properly.)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on February 17, 2016, 02:12:37 pm
And instead of fingers, allen keys?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on February 17, 2016, 06:05:30 pm
'Cup' in recipes is a standard measure.


Surely it depends on who's bra you are borrowing to do the measuring?

*leaves thread in disgrace*

Excelent, Basil. If you hadn't made that comment, I would have had to.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on February 17, 2016, 07:37:14 pm
Dear Whitbread,
Thank you for your email suggesting U book a table to celebrate Mothers' Day at your table table restaurant.
Don't you think it might be useful to remind me of the date of this auspicious occasion cos I can't remember.
I await further emails from Brewers Fayre and Beefeater.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on February 17, 2016, 08:00:34 pm
 Second Sunday of May.  Unless, of course, Whitbread had in mind Mothering Sunday, which is the fourth Sunday of Lent (6 March this year).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on February 17, 2016, 08:15:31 pm
I think the May one is USAnian and Mothering Sunday is held as Mothers' Day in the UK.

We don't do Mothers' Day in our family cos we're too Jewish but my Mum is 80 tomorrow and we've just had a BIGgish party.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on February 17, 2016, 08:19:23 pm
What's a gish party?  Is it fun?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on February 17, 2016, 08:56:43 pm
What's a gish party?  Is it fun?

Everyone comes in fancy dress and the person deemed to look most like Special Agent Monica Reyes is the winner.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: fboab on February 18, 2016, 08:45:45 am
We have no instant coffee so I had to make the removal man a caramel latte from the Tassimo. We also have no standard tea so the other two got Earl Grey.

(I can't believe I actually typed that, or that it's truly true)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on February 18, 2016, 09:45:06 am
So you're going up in the world today? 
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on February 18, 2016, 09:55:46 am
Happy move day!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on February 18, 2016, 10:46:20 am
Nice day for it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on February 18, 2016, 05:58:11 pm
We have no instant coffee so I had to make the removal man a caramel latte from the Tassimo. We also have no standard tea so the other two got Earl Grey.

(I can't believe I actually typed that, or that it's truly true)

Caramel latte? Are you trying to kill the poor fellow? (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-35593007)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on February 18, 2016, 06:57:40 pm
Waitrose was out of fresh coriander.

What is 'hummus dip' & how does it differ from hummus?

You have to specify that it's a dip or the proles might think it's some kind of poultice and spread it on their piles.

(Incidentally, I wanted the coriander to put in my chickpea curry - prepared by pressure-cooking one actual teacup of dried chickpeas in 2.5 actual teacups of water. I have no idea of the capacity of the actual teacup I used, in either metric or imperial units. I share the view of my learned friends on the matter of hummus without tahini.)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on February 18, 2016, 06:58:36 pm
In other FWP news, I've had to turn down a free cycling trip to Majorca.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ashaman42 on February 18, 2016, 07:02:51 pm
Ooh oooh me! I'll go for you!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on February 18, 2016, 07:03:07 pm
In other FWP news, I've had to turn down a free cycling trip to Majorca.
TBH, I'm struggling to summon up some any sympathy  :demon: :P
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on February 18, 2016, 08:05:48 pm
Suspect cityoen's Real LifeTM is interfering with the the cycling habit.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on February 18, 2016, 08:36:44 pm

Suspect cityoen's Real LifeTM is interfering with the the cycling habit.

You could say that.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on February 18, 2016, 08:58:25 pm
Fairy snuff.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pickled Onion on February 19, 2016, 07:50:09 am
We have no instant coffee so I had to make the removal man a caramel latte from the Tassimo. We also have no standard tea so the other two got Earl Grey.

(I can't believe I actually typed that, or that it's truly true)

Caramel latte? Are you trying to kill the poor fellow? (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-35593007)

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/health/massive-sickly-drink-with-shitloads-of-marshmallows-found-to-contain-sugar-20160217106334
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on February 19, 2016, 04:44:41 pm
Dear Whitbread,
Thank you for your email suggesting U book a table to celebrate Mothers' Day at your table table restaurant.
Don't you think it might be useful to remind me of the date of this auspicious occasion cos I can't remember.
I await further emails from Brewers Fayre and Beefeater.

Just had one from Beefeater, again not specifying the date for Mothers' Day...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pickled Onion on February 19, 2016, 10:39:42 pm
I've "earned" a discount of 40% off BA flights anywhere in Europe (mostly by cycling a lot).

Where can I go that the BA flight will be cheaper than a budget airline, taking into account the discount and their free bike baggage allowance?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on February 19, 2016, 10:42:50 pm
I appear to have run out of camomile tea.    :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on February 19, 2016, 11:15:28 pm
Do we need to arrange an air drop or alert the UNHCR?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on February 23, 2016, 12:27:42 pm

Where can I go that the BA flight will be cheaper than a budget airline, taking into account the discount and their free bike baggage allowance?

Are budget flights really any cheaper when you take those allowances into account? You pay less up front for no frills but then end up paying extra for a lot of necessary "frills" like luggage anyway.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on February 23, 2016, 12:50:19 pm
Budget flights tend to serve regional airports which saves you the most difficult and expensive part of the whole journey – getting to Heathrow or Gatwick. This is where BA and its cousins suck.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on February 23, 2016, 01:31:28 pm
Rail has the same access issues.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on March 01, 2016, 10:55:25 am
Apparently the Heathrow Express trains have been withdrawn and replaced with the Heathrow Connect trains. There was someone on radiogram complaining that they have no power sockets for their laptops. Imagine, an entire fifteen (twenty to terminal 5) without electricity. It's a horror I can't comprehend. The person on the radio sounded quite annoyed. Personally, I'd have punched them with a bear.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mcshroom on March 01, 2016, 11:53:27 am
I've lost my Co-op card. They have a lost card section on their website, but you need to know the entire 16 digit number on the card to use it! ???
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on March 01, 2016, 12:52:20 pm
The chickpeas in my dhal are undercooked.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on March 01, 2016, 05:24:06 pm
Thought you knew chick-peas took forever to cook!

My Sainsbury's delivery seems to have lacked a bag of produce; the oyster mushrooms, plums, Basics strawberries, oranges and cherry tomatoes are missing.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on March 06, 2016, 07:53:35 pm
I've just injured my finger trying to open a tube of lactose-free ice cream.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Blade on March 06, 2016, 11:16:22 pm
We move house in a weeks time.
For the first time in 25 years we will be without a dishwasher  :(
How will we cope for the six weeks it will take to fit a new kitchen and dishwasher in our new house?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on March 06, 2016, 11:25:34 pm
We move house in a weeks time.
For the first time in 25 years we will be without a dishwasher  :(
How will we cope for the six weeks it will take to fit a new kitchen and dishwasher in our new house?


Something like:

The new kitchen fit is going well, but we've just run out of paper plates :(

 ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on March 07, 2016, 10:27:28 am
We move house in a weeks time.
For the first time in 25 years we will be without a dishwasher  :(
How will we cope for the six weeks it will take to fit a new kitchen and dishwasher in our new house?

Bacon bowls?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Diver300 on March 09, 2016, 08:09:51 pm
I didn't get a flight in a private jet today. It was only a private twin engine turbo-prop. The power sockets on it were 110 V American ones and I hadn't brought the correct adaptor.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: caerau on March 09, 2016, 08:31:02 pm
We move house in a weeks time.
For the first time in 25 years we will be without a dishwasher  :(
How will we cope for the six weeks it will take to fit a new kitchen and dishwasher in our new house?


Bane of my childhood was my mother making us help with the washing up.  Washing or drying hmmm - I preferred washing, but I didn't always get to choose.


Then we got a dishwasher  in the 1980s - yay. 


Result?  Not really, doing the dishes was replaced was 'EMPTY THE DISHWASHER GRRRRR!' which seemed no different or less work than doing the  dishes.  Indeed, often as not it seemed to required - particularly with mugs - rewashing the dishwasher induced ick off the bottom followed by drying them anyway.


Upon leaving home I decided I'd never bother.  Met my wife and she'd never had one and didn't want one.


Then.... in the 2000s my mum gave us her old one and the wife seemed semi-keen so now we have one again.


Any different?  No. Ho hum.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: trekker12 on March 10, 2016, 02:17:10 pm
I quite like the fact we don't have a dishwasher.

Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on March 19, 2016, 11:58:10 am
The bag of 'Lightly Salted Tortilla Chips' I just opened is mis-labelled.  It should read "Hardly Salted At All Tortilla Chips".
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Bledlow on March 21, 2016, 12:20:18 am

Then we got a dishwasher  in the 1980s - yay. 

Result?  Not really, doing the dishes was replaced was 'EMPTY THE DISHWASHER GRRRRR!' which seemed no different or less work than doing the  dishes.  Indeed, often as not it seemed to required - particularly with mugs - rewashing the dishwasher induced ick off the bottom followed by drying them anyway.

Upon leaving home I decided I'd never bother.  Met my wife and she'd never had one and didn't want one.
Why I've never got one.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pickled Onion on March 25, 2016, 02:15:07 pm
Dishwashers have changed massively since the 1980s, everything comes out sparkling - and dry! I really miss mine, and I seem to be spending more in gloves and hand cream than the cost of running one...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on March 25, 2016, 03:13:18 pm
Great place to hide the dirty pots  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on March 25, 2016, 03:36:31 pm
I had a dishwasher in the nineties.   In the noughties I reverted back to washing up in the sink by hand.   I like doing the washing up.   :thumbsup:

   
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on March 25, 2016, 03:47:10 pm
I had a dishwasher in the nineties.   In the noughties I reverted back to washing up in the sink by hand.   I like doing the washing up.   :thumbsup:

So do I!

My dishwasher seals failed and machine has not been replaced.

These machine don't fill or empty themselves, do they?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on March 25, 2016, 03:50:57 pm
Staff.
What you need is staff.
Unfortunately, these days .......   ;)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on March 25, 2016, 04:33:33 pm
Staff.
What you need is staff.
Unfortunately, these days .......   ;)

I am staff...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on March 25, 2016, 04:52:35 pm
Staff.
What you need is staff.
Unfortunately, these days .......   ;)

I am staff...
;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pingu on March 26, 2016, 11:56:03 pm
I had a dishwasher in the nineties.   In the noughties I reverted back to washing up in the sink by hand.   I like doing the washing up.   :thumbsup:

So do I!

My dishwasher seals failed and machine has not been replaced.

These machine don't fill or empty themselves, do they?

I want a dishwashing seal.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on March 28, 2016, 04:00:45 pm
(http://brandmediaweek.typepad.com/.a/6a00d834519bc269e20120a53b71b5970c-600wi)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on March 29, 2016, 12:33:25 pm
I love my dishwasher (not in the sex way, come on, it's Italian). Even my butler wouldn't be caught washing dishes by hand. I had too much childhood trauma from scraping burned-on gravy from roasting trays (owing to my dad's preference for volcano hot overcooked food) to want to reach for the scrubbing brush ever again.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on March 29, 2016, 12:39:38 pm
We had some damage from the storm

(https://farm2.staticflickr.com/1558/26112103775_a395996f58_c.jpg) (https://flic.kr/p/FMrmHM)Storm Damage (https://flic.kr/p/FMrmHM) by paulfulford (https://www.flickr.com/photos/paul_fulford/), on Flickr
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: red marley on March 29, 2016, 12:48:49 pm
Blimey! I hope it's insured otherwise you're looking at a hefty bill to get some people in to sort it out.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on March 29, 2016, 12:54:09 pm
Sort it out?  Surely it's only fit for firewood now?  Though I'm sure someone in Africa would be grateful to have it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on March 29, 2016, 12:55:35 pm
Ground anchors required with hawsers obv.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Hot Flatus on March 29, 2016, 12:57:21 pm
Really sorry to hear about this, PaulF. One never really knows what lies around the corner in life.

Have you considered counselling?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on March 29, 2016, 01:15:59 pm
Really sorry to hear about this, PaulF. One never really knows what lies around the corner in life.

Have you considered counselling?

I'm trying to be philosophical about this, we got off more lightly than others. I heard that someone on the next village  had both their garden chairs AND the table blown over.

I'm more worried about how I'm going to feed the birds. The poor little things have come to rely on me for their organic-low fat-unsalted birdseed. They're the ones who are struggling, not me.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on March 29, 2016, 01:24:45 pm
Have you considered laying the birds on their side?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tigerrr on March 29, 2016, 04:11:20 pm
Nice looking load of sleepers there. But the garden hose is frankly a mess.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Legs on March 31, 2016, 11:16:29 am
We've run out of ketjap manis so we had to have bog-standard dark soy on our gingery pork and cabbage meatballs last night...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on March 31, 2016, 01:32:19 pm
For two consecutive deliveries, Mr Sainsbury's House of Toothsome Comestibles has failed to supply me with dried apricots and apple rings.

I can only attack my dwindling supply of dried figs.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: orienteer on March 31, 2016, 04:27:07 pm
Well, they should keep you going.....
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on March 31, 2016, 05:17:36 pm
That is the idea! ;)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on April 04, 2016, 03:55:48 pm
Sainsbury's have stopped selling Yeo Valley butter for delivery, as well as Yeo Valley full-fat Greek yoghurt.

Yeo Valley butter is fine and caramelly and lovely and I love it.  Huh.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on April 04, 2016, 06:35:48 pm
No apricots from Sainsbury's AGAIN...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on April 04, 2016, 10:21:23 pm
Our avocado wasn't ripe so instead of home made guacamole we had to have bought
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: HTFB on April 06, 2016, 08:05:01 pm
I want a dishwashing seal.

Or a washing guppy.


---

An idea I've propounded before:
The ideal is to have two dishwashers. Then you don't even need a kitchen cupboard.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on April 06, 2016, 11:43:47 pm
I have to take the car in for a service tomorrow.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ElyDave on April 07, 2016, 08:38:17 am
My first work related travel in two months starts on Sunday. 

I need to remember how to pack again.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: asterix on April 07, 2016, 09:44:02 am
Having the nice grass verge outside your house plowed ploughed up by a large lorry delivering stuff to the house opposite.

What were they delivering?  Turf for their new lawn.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Legs on April 07, 2016, 10:12:12 am
We had that happen back in January.  According to one of our neighbours, a van/lorry/truck (her terminology varied) had got stuck at about 45 degrees (probably a considerable exaggeration) and had threatened to topple over into our hedge, all the while trashing our verge.  They reportedly blocked the road for 3 hours, and got pulled out shortly before either my wife or I got home to witness the spectacle.  Ba5t@rd$.  :demon:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on April 07, 2016, 08:11:17 pm
I have to take the car in for a service tomorrow.

Lots of luck with that.

Hopefully you will have a better experience than our Bumper...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: asterix on April 08, 2016, 09:47:23 am
We had that happen back in January.  According to one of our neighbours, a van/lorry/truck (her terminology varied) had got stuck at about 45 degrees (probably a considerable exaggeration) and had threatened to topple over into our hedge, all the while trashing our verge.  They reportedly blocked the road for 3 hours, and got pulled out shortly before either my wife or I got home to witness the spectacle.  Ba5t@rd$.  :demon:

We now have a bus stuck on our verge.  It has been there over 20 minutes and the back wheel just digs itself deeper - it's going nowhere.  The driver has eaten his lunch and is now out of his seat and gone for a little walk.  It has two passengers.   

Stop press: a passenger has left the bus and is advising the driver what to do it appears. Driver is phoning a friend. 
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on April 09, 2016, 06:16:42 pm
Having the nice grass verge outside your house plowed ploughed up by a large lorry delivering stuff to the house opposite.

What were they delivering?  Turf for their new lawn.

Ah irony. Our verge has mostly gone, but I can't see it so have stopped feeling precious. Usually lorries trying to get around the corner, occasionally cars at the top of the narrow hill too impatient to wait an entire second or two so trying to squeeze by each other.

There's a concrete bollard that gets periodically knocked over, though the nice scrapes of coloured paint on it give me plenty of satisfaction.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: SoreTween on April 09, 2016, 09:09:26 pm
The forecast today was dry with sunny intervals all day.  We got rain showers, sleet and a bit of snow with sunny intervals.  As a result I have not got nearly as far as I planned with erecting our new greenhouse.  I shall not complete the job tomorrow and Mrs Tween will have to wait an entire extra 6 days to get planting.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on April 11, 2016, 09:52:55 pm
Chardonnay.
HTF did that end up in my shopping basket?
 :sick:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: caerau on April 11, 2016, 11:53:44 pm
Chardonnay.
HTF did that end up in my shopping basket?
 :sick:


Try and stick to just the one bottle next time ;)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: geraldc on April 12, 2016, 01:58:28 pm
Just buy Chablis, and pretend you don't know about varietals
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mike on April 12, 2016, 03:46:17 pm
my cleaners normally come at 3.30 every second tuesday and I nip down the road for some coffee & cake while they're here.   

They came early today, just as I finished my lunch, but I felt too awkward to stay in the house so went out for coffee & (excellent) cake anyway meaning I'm still uncomfortably full.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on April 12, 2016, 05:56:59 pm
It's impossible to change one's pedal system without chipping one's nail varnish.

It was a really nice pale pink as well.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on April 12, 2016, 06:58:09 pm
Chardonnay.
HTF did that end up in my shopping basket?
 :sick:

More importantly, I bought some prepared veg on Saturday (because I'm on my own and feel lazy, and for added First World points, it was broccoli and cauliflower 'couscous'). I was preparing dinner last night and, well, it's nowhere to be found. So I either neglected to put it in my shopping bag or I've put it somewhere that is curiously not the fridge. The perils of going shopping with jetlag.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on April 12, 2016, 07:03:08 pm
Stick around, your nose will tell you soon enough . . .
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rafletcher on April 12, 2016, 09:08:50 pm
Just buy Chablis, and pretend you don't know about varietals

Or Mersault.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on April 12, 2016, 09:14:58 pm
Just buy Chablis, and pretend you don't know about varietals

Or Mersault.
You don't want a psychopathic killer in your shopping basket, do you!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on April 12, 2016, 09:38:56 pm
Chardonnay.
HTF did that end up in my shopping basket?
 :sick:

More importantly, I bought some prepared veg on Saturday (because I'm on my own and feel lazy, and for added First World points, it was broccoli and cauliflower 'couscous'). I was preparing dinner last night and, well, it's nowhere to be found. So I either neglected to put it in my shopping bag or I've put it somewhere that is curiously not the fridge. The perils of going shopping with jetlag.

Does this qualify as 'First World' given that you appear to have gone shopping (as opposed to having it delivered)?
Does that count?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Redlight on April 13, 2016, 09:47:25 am
If you are a car hire firm in a part of the country that markets itself heavily as the ideal place for a weekend getaway, wouldn't it be a good idea to stay open after 5pm on Fridays and perhaps have some way of returning cars on Sundays?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on April 13, 2016, 12:39:21 pm
Chardonnay.
HTF did that end up in my shopping basket?
 :sick:

More importantly, I bought some prepared veg on Saturday (because I'm on my own and feel lazy, and for added First World points, it was broccoli and cauliflower 'couscous'). I was preparing dinner last night and, well, it's nowhere to be found. So I either neglected to put it in my shopping bag or I've put it somewhere that is curiously not the fridge. The perils of going shopping with jetlag.

Does this qualify as 'First World' given that you appear to have gone shopping (as opposed to having it delivered)?
Does that count?

I surely get some points for buying prepared vegetables and, ye gads, faux couscous made from scrambled up broccoli and cauliflower. I also bought some 'courgette noodles' and successfully didn't manage to lose those.

I can make my own courgette 'noodles' but I admit 'couscous' is more of a problem since I'm typically too lazy to mess with a food processor.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: geraldc on April 16, 2016, 01:34:14 pm
I may have to get a little vacuum cleaner to clean my robot vacuum cleaner that appears to be a magnet for dust
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on April 16, 2016, 02:20:50 pm
Chardonnay.
HTF did that end up in my shopping basket?
 :sick:

More importantly, I bought some prepared veg on Saturday (because I'm on my own and feel lazy, and for added First World points, it was broccoli and cauliflower 'couscous'). I was preparing dinner last night and, well, it's nowhere to be found. So I either neglected to put it in my shopping bag or I've put it somewhere that is curiously not the fridge. The perils of going shopping with jetlag.

Does this qualify as 'First World' given that you appear to have gone shopping (as opposed to having it delivered)?
Does that count?

I surely get some points for buying prepared vegetables and, ye gads, faux couscous made from scrambled up broccoli and cauliflower. I also bought some 'courgette noodles' and successfully didn't manage to lose those.

I can make my own courgette 'noodles' but I admit 'couscous' is more of a problem since I'm typically too lazy to mess with a food processor.

I would've thought that would score quite high on the First World Problems register...

I may have to get a little vacuum cleaner to clean my robot vacuum cleaner that appears to be a magnet for dust
Have you considered applying some of the anti-static stuff for use on VDUs to your robo-vac?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on April 16, 2016, 02:26:44 pm
Isn't a vacuum cleaner *supposed* to be a dust magnet, thobut?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on April 16, 2016, 02:34:34 pm
Isn't a vacuum cleaner *supposed* to be a dust magnet, thobut?
My interpretation, which could be wrong, is that it is the outside of Gerald's robo-vac which is attracting dust.
To me that suggests a static issue.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on April 16, 2016, 03:05:34 pm
Have you considered a, er, duster?  A damp one?   ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on April 16, 2016, 04:16:04 pm
I may have to get a little vacuum cleaner to clean my robot vacuum cleaner that appears to be a magnet for dust

And how will you keep the little one clean
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on April 16, 2016, 04:26:52 pm
My nail varnish is chipping terribly.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on April 16, 2016, 04:31:42 pm
My nail varnish is chipping terribly.
Two pack (http://www.paints4trade.com/2-pack-epoxy-top-coat-boat-paint-2215-p.asp?v=0&variantid=2739&fo_c=888&fo_k=d6123440ba4601f8ade7fcf24a8493df&fo_s=gplauk&gclid=CL2nme-8k8wCFYcp0wodBbwOjA) is your friend.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on April 16, 2016, 04:39:38 pm
I may have to get a little vacuum cleaner to clean my robot vacuum cleaner that appears to be a magnet for dust

And how will you keep the little one clean

It's vacuum cleaners all the way down.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on April 16, 2016, 04:51:55 pm
My nail varnish is chipping terribly.
Two pack (http://www.paints4trade.com/2-pack-epoxy-top-coat-boat-paint-2215-p.asp?v=0&variantid=2739&fo_c=888&fo_k=d6123440ba4601f8ade7fcf24a8493df&fo_s=gplauk&gclid=CL2nme-8k8wCFYcp0wodBbwOjA) is your friend.

<changes name to Boaty Mcboatface>
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on April 16, 2016, 06:53:50 pm
Partner has decided he does not like Sainsbury's 'Taste the Difference' Lemon, Honey & Ginger Infusion...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tigerrr on April 28, 2016, 06:18:18 am
What's the point? Here we are on the costa blanca in April and today as I sip my early morning tea I can see some clouds. I may have to wear clear specs today instead of sunglasses.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on April 28, 2016, 11:30:18 am
Reverse gear on my Logitech G27 has stopped working :'(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pickled Onion on May 02, 2016, 03:34:52 pm
Reverse gear on my Logitech G27 has stopped working :'(

That happened on my mate's 1300TC, when he needed to parallel park he'd open the door and push back with his right foot. I'm guessing that wouldn't work for you?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on May 02, 2016, 04:04:56 pm
I've redefined another button to be reverse for the moment but you have to hold it down while reversing.  Contact cleaner to be purchased tomorrow.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on May 02, 2016, 04:09:55 pm
It's raining, so I have had to delay delivering election leaflets...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on May 02, 2016, 04:28:42 pm
I treated myself to a packet of Basset's Liquorice Allsorts and was very dissappointed to find that the liquorice sandwiches are an austerity version, being truncated to rectangles instead of the traditional squares.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tigerrr on May 02, 2016, 06:33:01 pm
Just arrived in hotel, and fancied the steak from the menu in the restaurant, but in the room so we can watch TV. For some reason the room service menu and the restaurant are separate and it isn't available. Why oh why o why.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andyoxon on May 02, 2016, 06:52:01 pm
I treated myself to a packet of Basset's Liquorice Allsorts and was very dissappointed to find that the liquorice sandwiches are an austerity version, being truncated to rectangles instead of the traditional squares.

I agree - poor state of affairs this shrinkflation.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on May 05, 2016, 03:49:52 pm
I cannot decide whether to take my round shiny pan or my black rectangular ones to Long Itch. Which will coordinate better with my spork?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on May 05, 2016, 05:25:26 pm
Will you be mostly cooking round food or square food?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on May 06, 2016, 11:22:58 am
The Lindor truffles on offer 'free' when I ordered >£10 stuffs from the milkman in a single order were unavailable today.
I feel cheated.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on May 17, 2016, 12:34:49 pm
Thanks for the link.   :thumbsup:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on May 17, 2016, 12:43:30 pm
 :D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: caerau on May 17, 2016, 12:50:23 pm
I did kind of wonder with that one - with all the resources that running a website like the BBC requires - is archiving several thousand recipes *really* a big expense relative to the other stuff?  :-\
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rogerzilla on May 20, 2016, 08:26:59 pm
This pina colada has slightly too much coconut in it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: fboab on May 22, 2016, 07:30:38 pm
(http://www.minx-girl.com/prodzoomimg3576.jpg)
These horrendously overpriced beautiful shorts are only available in small & medium.

(click to show/hide)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Oaky on May 23, 2016, 10:38:01 am
I dropped from Gold to Silver in the BA Executive club.  I'll have to slum it in the business lounges for a while instead of First.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on May 23, 2016, 10:46:32 am
Pah, I dropped from Silver to the badlands of Blue (BA seem to always be ludicrously expensive at the moment, my next flight to Vancouver was £1000 less with Air Canada). I get to sit at the gate watching the comedy boarding (seriously, how many comedy boarding tiers can they have, the plane isn't going to leave, and as mentioned I'm the chap who waits till the end and then makes you get out of your seat).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on May 23, 2016, 11:07:12 am
I suppose it's different for you tidy-haired types sitting in front of the curtain but the only way I could save more than a fiver on this summer's flight to Chicago was by flying with Terrible Airlines and changing planes in Amsterdam/Paris/Atlanta/Dagenham Heathway.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: geraldc on May 23, 2016, 11:23:45 am
Dropping from Gold to Silver affects not 1 but 2 people. The cardholder, and the guest they can sign into the first lounge, get through the express security check etc.
My wife needs 1 more business class or better long haul flight before October to keep Gold for another year, and I have no idea what I will do if she gets downgraded.

The worst story I've heard is a friend is about 3 years away from completing 1 million miles with American Airlines, as a result she will only fly American, and American are terrible. We asked what's so special about getting to 1 million miles, and she said it was priority boarding for life.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on May 23, 2016, 12:28:57 pm
I find the entire airline classes and pecking order peculiarly amusing. It's like small stage social warfare. That petty little curtain between the classes. Of course, to justify business and first, airlines I'm sure make economy worse than it has to be. Look what we'll do to you if you don't upgrade is basically their business policy. The only real perk are the lounges, which are far better places to spend the time, but for the same effective cost, you could stay in the most luxurious hotel known to mankind.

Contrary to popular belief, this third division Tidy Haired Thought Leader™ is on the wrong side of the curtain most of the time. I'm only allowed business for flights more than 8 hours intercontinental and not-under-any-circumstances North America. Plus the Concur robot is getting smart and sends memos to my boss, my boss's boss, and his boss if I book a ticket that costs more than the 'next cheapest logical fare'. I would have got back on the BA scheme if I'd done my next trip to Vancouver with them, but the robot won't let me, which left me the choice between Air Canada and some budget airline from Gatwick. I think I'm edging on Gold for Virgin because I do a lot of trips via Johannesburg. I could upgrade on my air miles, but I prefer to cash those in for cheaper holidays (or rather my wife does).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on May 23, 2016, 06:20:45 pm
I looked at Transat for a flight to Vancouver last year and it was shedloads cheaper than BA, until I looked again two days later and it had become the same price.  Then it turned out that Mr Budget couldn't rent me a convertible from Vancouver anyway so I had to go to Seattle instead.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rogerzilla on May 23, 2016, 09:13:52 pm
I normally only go on charter airlines where they just board one end of the plane, then the other.  Luckily flights to "lakes and mountains" type destinations are totally chav-free, unlike the herds at the gates for Palma and Ibiza, who are truly terrifying in their shaven-headed, morning drunkenness.

I avoid budget airlines if travelling on my own money, having had fairly dismal experiences on SleazyJet and the now-defunct BMI baby, and you'd never get me on a Ryanair flight.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mrcharly-YHT on May 24, 2016, 11:39:37 am
I dribbled toothpaste foam on my (black) Tshirt this morning when brushing my teeth. Only found out when I got to work. White splatters all down my front.

When I tried using Strava to record runs, I didn't realise you have to set the activity type in your profile. So it recorded my runs as bike rides. So now I've uploaded two truly lightning fast bike rides that won't get added to my total running distance (which is pitiful anyway).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: caerau on May 24, 2016, 01:07:06 pm


When I tried using Strava to record runs, I didn't realise you have to set the activity type in your profile. So it recorded my runs as bike rides. So now I've uploaded two truly lightning fast bike rides that won't get added to my total running distance (which is pitiful anyway).


You can change it  using the edit function surely.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on May 24, 2016, 01:20:52 pm


When I tried using Strava to record runs, I didn't realise you have to set the activity type in your profile. So it recorded my runs as bike rides. So now I've uploaded two truly lightning fast bike rides that won't get added to my total running distance (which is pitiful anyway).


You can change it  using the edit function surely.

Yes.

Open the activity. In the top left area is the overview box. At the bottom of this is an icon that looks like a pencil. Click on this and you can change the activity type
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mrcharly-YHT on May 24, 2016, 01:59:33 pm
Ah - not possible from Android - but possible from a PC. Thank you for that.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on May 24, 2016, 02:07:57 pm
Ah - not possible from Android - but possible from a PC. Thank you for that.

On the iPhone it's the field called "Sport", can definitely edit it there
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on May 24, 2016, 02:19:45 pm
On my android phone in the record activity screen at top left you can select between cycling (bicycle symbol) and running (shoe symbol).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Zipperhead on May 26, 2016, 12:30:08 pm
Oh this is just to much. We are moving offices today, to another building. Not only is our wonderful coffee machine shutdown, forcing me to walk to the next street to get a decent cup of coffee, but there's no internet. Surely it's a basic human right? Why is there  such an obvious lack of planning?

If I weren't having to give a talk in a little while (on a highly technical subject but without being able to use or show the technology) I would just admit defeat and decamp to Shoreditch. I'm sure that it's better there.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on May 27, 2016, 10:28:00 pm
The Tesco delivery people brought me an unwanted sweet & sour chicken pizza (a) I'm vegetarian and b) wtf?) and forgot the 3 aubergines I wanted.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on May 27, 2016, 10:29:03 pm
Chicken on pizza is just WRONG.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on May 27, 2016, 10:56:45 pm
Less wrong than aubergines though.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jakob W on May 28, 2016, 08:58:42 am
When I lived in Peckham my local Italian did an excellent pizza with aubergine (and courgette, ham, and pepperoni).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on May 28, 2016, 09:14:51 am
I once had a wonderful vegan pizza with aubergine slices instead of cheese.  It was twenty years ago and I still remember how nice it was.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: jsabine on May 28, 2016, 10:13:31 pm
Having just made and largely consumed a very fine1 babaganoush, I'm not sure I'm prepared to hear a word said against aubergines.




1: Yes, I *do* say so myself.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: citoyen on June 09, 2016, 09:35:26 am
Tickets for the NT's new season went on sale to Priority members this morning, so I've spent the last hour trying to get on to the website, eventually to get the message that the sale has been suspended due to technical difficulties.

Pah!

Suspect Peter Shaffer's death has generated extra interest in the new production of Amadeus.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on June 18, 2016, 08:55:42 pm
I am in the mood for some Pinot Grigio. I have no Pinot Grigio. This is intolerable.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Redlight on June 19, 2016, 02:59:08 pm
Our final shuttlecock has just gone over the fence into next door's jungle and I cannot be arced trekking all the way to Decathlon to buy more.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mrcharly-YHT on June 23, 2016, 11:12:41 am
I have run out of Taylors of Bond Street Shaving cream.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on June 25, 2016, 06:19:48 pm
Anyone know a 24-7 tailor in London?  I forgot that the sleeves of the dinner jacket I'm planning to wear tomorrow need to be shortened.  :facepalm:

AND... my local drycleaners don't understand the concept of a properly starched shirt - it should stand up on its own! 

My fault, I guess.  One should never let one's staff go off on holiday prior to a major social engagement.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on June 29, 2016, 09:09:55 pm
My Amazon delivery of a CD by a Welsh singer is being delivered from Italy ?   Is there an equivalent of food  miles for this sort of thing ?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on June 29, 2016, 10:04:16 pm
Don't fret.  In a couple of years they'll be coming from the Channel Islands again.  ;)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PeteB99 on July 02, 2016, 04:44:34 pm
2 of the buckets waiting for my Waitrose charity token were for a cycling paramedic group and the local search and rescue team.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on July 21, 2016, 10:39:25 am
The "noise cancelling" LED on my Bluetooth headphones has stopped working.

The actual noise cancelling still works fine, it's just the LED that's packed in!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on July 22, 2016, 09:23:25 am
I can't find a new gardener. Seriously, I've written to five companies and they say they're too busy.

Or possibly my garden has a rep. I've not seen a yeti for days and the bears are OK if you don't make eye contact and slowly back away. There may be ancient ruins in there somewhere.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on July 22, 2016, 09:59:16 am
Your should look for a dog walker instead.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on July 22, 2016, 10:09:18 am
I'd recommend the groundsman from Fort Larrington but he's at the wrong end of Surrey and has been having trouble recently with both his van and his minions.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on July 22, 2016, 10:14:25 am
I was going to suggest goats, but they'd only end up as yeti/bear food.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on July 22, 2016, 10:33:29 am
I was going to suggest goats, but they'd only end up as yeti/bear food.

I could borrow one from Riddlesdown, I suppose, though I'd imagine getting one down the A22 on the back of my bike might be a struggle.

Though not entirely odd for Croydon, I saw a guy walking a goat on a lead the other weekend.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on July 22, 2016, 10:37:22 am
Quote from: Befuddled of teh Internets
The Yeti does not have much problem in obtaining food since it is rather strong and fast.  It is primarily carnivorous, but will consume plants if necessary. In a dire situation, it is not very picky about its meal. For a meat course, the Yeti will typically feed on non-predator animals, such as the Argali sheep, the Bharal, the Markhor, which are both either in sheep or goat families.  If meat is scarce, the Yeti will usually turn to any bamboo that's around, but little else due to lack of availability.  The Yeti has no predators and is at the top of its food chain.

Which begs the question: are yetis known to be keen on puddings?

Befuddled also claims that:
Quote
The average annual temperature for the Himalayan mountains is 47 degrees Fahrenheit.  Although this may not sound too cold, the temperature in this mountain range is constantly changing according to the elevation. The lower the elevation, the lower the temperature will be.  This constant variation of temperature is something the Yeti has evolved to with its thick fur coat.
(My bold)

I think I'm right in my belief that Befuddled knows little of:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on July 22, 2016, 01:11:37 pm
I can't find a new gardener. Seriously, I've written to five companies and they say they're too busy.

Or possibly my garden has a rep. I've not seen a yeti for days and the bears are OK if you don't make eye contact and slowly back away. There may be ancient ruins in there somewhere.

What's it like for pokemon?  You might be able to recruit some pasty geeks...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on July 22, 2016, 03:03:54 pm
pasty geeks...

Beef, onion, potato, swede. No deviation!

(igmc)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on July 22, 2016, 03:56:58 pm
I can't find a new gardener. Seriously, I've written to five companies and they say they're too busy.

Or possibly my garden has a rep. I've not seen a yeti for days and the bears are OK if you don't make eye contact and slowly back away. There may be ancient ruins in there somewhere.

What's it like for pokemon?  You might be able to recruit some pasty geeks...

There's an entire ecosystem up there. The yeti are some kind of subspecies to the Himalayan variety and appear to live mainly on crisps and other snacks, and evidently any stray gardeners. There could be a pokémon or two hatching behind the pampas grass.

We did have gardeners last year. They came and did two days work and we never saw them again. I did find a pair of ear-defenders, but that's it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on July 23, 2016, 06:36:52 pm
It is so difficult to find suitably-sized pieces of paper for shopping lists towards the end of the month, when the counterfoils from the winning premium bond cheques have run out.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on August 05, 2016, 10:18:28 pm
It's very annoying when you have two bluetooth speakers, and the only one you can find is the one with the godawful sound quality, and you want to have a bath to the sound of 80s legends Talk Talk. 
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Deano on August 05, 2016, 10:20:01 pm
Never mind - life's what you make it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on August 05, 2016, 10:20:45 pm
oh god
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on August 09, 2016, 02:36:07 pm
My Graze box does not appear to have arrived.
I have checked its contents online.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: madcow on August 09, 2016, 07:29:17 pm
Does that make you feel less hungry or more?
Virtual eating-it's the future.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on August 10, 2016, 12:23:02 am
Neither. My kitchen is well-stocked without my Graze box.
I will have to nibble grissini..
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on August 10, 2016, 01:05:42 pm
My Cawston Press cucumber & mint fizzy pop had a flimsy ringpull which detached from the can, so I had to punch my way in with my housekeys.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on August 10, 2016, 02:09:25 pm
Have you claimed for trauma counselling? PTSD is not a trivial condition . .  .
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tim Hall on August 10, 2016, 04:01:36 pm
There seems to be insufficient bandwidth in my office for me to keep; an eye on C Froome and G Thomas in the time trial.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mrcharly-YHT on August 10, 2016, 04:32:20 pm
Having set personal bests on strava on my lunchtime run, I've pulled a calf muscle.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on August 10, 2016, 05:25:07 pm
There seems to be insufficient bandwidth in my office for me to keep; an eye on C Froome and G Thomas in the time trial.

Ph3ar n0t, little loony lad, for  has been watching the TT so you don't have to. (https://yacf.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=98903.msg2065991#msg2065991P@nd3m1c® Pr0duct10nz™[/url)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on August 10, 2016, 06:35:40 pm
I can't find my panel pins. Will my pain never end?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: spesh on August 10, 2016, 06:41:19 pm
There seems to be insufficient bandwidth in my office for me to keep; an eye on C Froome and G Thomas in the time trial.

Ph3ar n0t, little loony lad, for  has been watching the TT so you don't have to.
 (https://yacf.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=98903.msg2065991#msg2065991P@nd3m1c® Pr0duct10nz™[/url)

I think you meant:

Ph3ar n0t, little loony lad, for P@nd3m1c® Pr0duct10nz™ (https://yacf.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=98903.msg2065991#msg2065991) has been watching the TT so you don't have to.


HTH.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on August 10, 2016, 08:14:36 pm
Fondleslab...stubby peasant fingers...bah!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: meddyg on August 10, 2016, 08:52:05 pm
" I've had to switch from eating venison to pheasant -
but it's turned out to be an absolute game changer!"



(stolen from Darren Walsh set @ Edin Fringe)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on August 10, 2016, 09:40:28 pm
Knicked!   :thumbsup:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: T42 on August 11, 2016, 07:48:48 am
White jeans today, nothing to dry my hands on.  Dog still wiped his nose, though.

Fondleslab...stubby peasant fingers...bah!

Shaky geriatric fingers, cretinaceous thing thinks I'm trying to move the page when I'm poking a link.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on August 11, 2016, 12:59:42 pm
Shaky geriatric fingers, cretinaceous thing thinks I'm trying to move the page when I'm poking a link.

That's a very good point.  Low-pass filtering the touch input would be a valuable accessibility feature.  (My family have a history of Essential Tremors, so I know how big a deal this sort of thing can be.)

I saw someone's research project some years ago in which they'd written software to filter Parkinsons tremors (which apparently have a very specific frequency) out of mouse input.  Sadly that idea doesn't seem to have made it to the mainstream yet.  Maybe when the current generation of software developers get old?

Otherwise, have you considered using a stylus?  You can get them for capacitive touchscreens.  Have a blob on the end that simulates a very small finger.  They're a good compromise between the frustration of finger input and faffing about driving a fondleslab with a mouse (and as a bonus, keep the screen smudge-free).

Also, on Android, there's a developer menu option you can enable called "Show touches" which draws a dot where the device thinks you're touching.  It won't do anything for tremors, but I find this gives useful feedback that improves touch accuracy when tapping small features on web pages.  TBH, I think it should be moved to the accessibility menu, as it's so useful.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on August 11, 2016, 03:00:07 pm
Friend Facebooked next MacBookPro will replace keyboard with touch screen.
DON NOT WANT!
Grossly inappropriate for silver surfers and crips like me!!!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on August 11, 2016, 03:11:54 pm
Friend Facebooked next MacBookPro will replace keyboard with touch screen.
DON NOT WANT!
Grossly inappropriate for silver surfers and crips like me!!!

Not a chance in hell.

However, it's very strongly rumoured that the next generation of fruitphones will do away with the headphone port, switching to either Lightning-based earphones or Bluetooth only.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on August 11, 2016, 04:42:42 pm
Friend Facebooked next MacBookPro will replace keyboard with touch screen.
DON NOT WANT!
Grossly inappropriate for silver surfers and crips like me!!!

Not a chance in hell.

However, it's very strongly rumoured that the next generation of fruitphones will do away with the headphone port, switching to either Lightning-based earphones or Bluetooth only.
S'true. The people responsible for fruitphone have deemed the next one will be too thin to accommodate a 3.5mm jack socket.
It is no coincidence that they have also recently acquired a very popular headphone brand. Begins with a 'b'
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on August 11, 2016, 05:06:49 pm
Friend Facebooked next MacBookPro will replace keyboard with touch screen.
DON NOT WANT!
Grossly inappropriate for silver surfers and crips like me!!!

Not a chance in hell.

However, it's very strongly rumoured that the next generation of fruitphones will do away with the headphone port, switching to either Lightning-based earphones or Bluetooth only.
S'true. The people responsible for fruitphone have deemed the next one will be too thin to accommodate a 3.5mm jack socket.
It is no coincidence that they have also recently acquired a very popular headphone brand. Begins with a 'b'

Well it's all still rumours AFAIK, but rumours on Daring Fireball generally have a canny habit of coming true. My understanding was that it was less to do with thinness and more to do with the extra-thick bezel below the screen to accommodate the length of the jack, although I guess they're all intertwined to an extent.

Doesn't bother me, my go-to headphones are Bluetooth now anyway, but lots of people will be caught out by it I think.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on August 11, 2016, 05:22:49 pm
Tis a cruel irony of modern life that the teensy headphone jack is about to become too big. Bring back my old skool Sony Walkman and sponge headphones, I say, and let's get wired for sound. I'm sure that thing ate no fewer than four AA batteries every two hours and was the size of a small hatchback car.

I thought the rumour was that the next iteration of Macbooks would have touchscreens (of course they won't replace the keyboard, otherwise they'd just be iPad Pros). Personally, while I'm happy to prod my iPad and iPhone screens, I've never wanted to jab my Macbook screen with my grubby fingers, but then I'm getting old.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on August 11, 2016, 05:54:58 pm
The cruel irony of modern life is that by removing the headphone jack they pave the way for DRM-to-the-headphones.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on August 11, 2016, 07:01:24 pm
Otherwise, have you considered using a stylus?  You can get them for capacitive touchscreens.  Have a blob on the end that simulates a very small finger.  They're a good compromise between the frustration of finger input and faffing about driving a fondleslab with a mouse (and as a bonus, keep the screen smudge-free).

I have one for use with my phone since my stubby peasant fingers can scarcely cope with a fondleslab, never mind the titchy "keys" on the phone (I am not one of those people who believes in mobile phones the size of car number plates, y'see). The only problem with is it this: where do you put it when you're not using it?  ATM it lives in my wallet which, more often than not, is in a different room from the phone.

I imagine that ten minutes after the next-gen Jesusphone hits the shelves some clever bugger in China will be flogging Lightning->3.5mm headphone adaptors, which the Mega-Global Fruit Corporation of Cupertino, USAnia will then replicate at five times the price.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on August 11, 2016, 07:47:21 pm
Otherwise, have you considered using a stylus?

I have one for use with my phone since my stubby peasant fingers can scarcely cope with a fondleslab, never mind the titchy "keys" on the phone (I am not one of those people who believes in mobile phones the size of car number plates, y'see). The only problem with is it this: where do you put it when you're not using it?

Mine seems to migrate back to the magpie collection[1] of random objects that lives between my keyboard and minotaurs.

This is obviously suboptimal, as if I'm within arm's reach of that, I'm also within arm's reach of a proper computer with a menagerie of meece.  Which means it only tends to get deployed for the aftermath of firmware upgrades and the like.



Quote
I imagine that ten minutes after the next-gen Jesusphone hits the shelves some clever bugger in China will be flogging Lightning->3.5mm headphone adaptors, which the Mega-Global Fruit Corporation of Cupertino, USAnia will then replicate at five times the price.

I assume the Mega-Global Fruit Corporation of Cupertino, USAnia have done focus groups, and concluded that their customers just *really love* dongles.


[1] This came up - appropriately enough on twitter - ages ago.  The magpie collection being where you deposit all those random pleasing and/or useful small items that you collect while around and about.  Mine currently sports: an assortment of dongles and adaptors; a pirate RADAR key that's too small for canal gates; several keyring rings; a radiator key; a little LED torch; a couple of dozen googly eyes; two cable-ties (one used); various important-looking screws; a York Rally pin; some tweezers; a Scharader valve cap; a Bikeregister sticker; a 555 timer chip; a bisexual identification card[2]; some mouse feet; a lanyard (Garmins for the use of); some more tweezers; the little screwdriver for putting your glasses back together when the lens falls out; an LED with bendy legs; an assortment of obsolete flash memory; a lump of blu-tac; a 15cm steel ruler bearing the name of a popular 1980s antibiotic; some CP44 hearing aid batteries; the keys for the upstairs windows; a strip of NFC tags; a buffered analgesic and no tea.

[2] All card-carrying bisexuals have one.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on August 11, 2016, 08:10:58 pm
Tis a cruel irony of modern life that the teensy headphone jack is about to become too big. Bring back my old skool Sony Walkman and sponge headphones, I say, and let's get wired for sound. I'm sure that thing ate no fewer than four AA batteries every two hours and was the size of a small hatchback car.

I thought the rumour was that the next iteration of Macbooks would have touchscreens (of course they won't replace the keyboard, otherwise they'd just be iPad Pros). Personally, while I'm happy to prod my iPad and iPhone screens, I've never wanted to jab my Macbook screen with my grubby fingers, but then I'm getting old.
Did you pay the extra tenner for the rewind button?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on August 11, 2016, 10:53:12 pm
Tis a cruel irony of modern life that the teensy headphone jack is about to become too big. Bring back my old skool Sony Walkman and sponge headphones, I say, and let's get wired for sound. I'm sure that thing ate no fewer than four AA batteries every two hours and was the size of a small hatchback car.

I thought the rumour was that the next iteration of Macbooks would have touchscreens (of course they won't replace the keyboard, otherwise they'd just be iPad Pros). Personally, while I'm happy to prod my iPad and iPhone screens, I've never wanted to jab my Macbook screen with my grubby fingers, but then I'm getting old.
Did you pay the extra tenner for the rewind button?

Not on the first one, which was still way cool, rewind was for backwards looking squares. A few years later I got the one that could play either side of the tape without removing and flipping it (though I think that only had a fast forward, you had to rewind by fast forwarding the other side of the tape). In practice, pressing the buttons too fast (i.e. without pausing for thirty entire seconds) would result in thirty frustrating minutes trying to piggle the tape from the head and respooling it. Whereafter it would woo-wooo-woo as it dopplered through the scrunched up tape.

And then there was the gradual battery decline as the music slowed down to the point you couldn't bear it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on August 11, 2016, 10:56:47 pm
And then there was the gradual battery decline as the music slowed down to the point you couldn't bear it.

Interestingly, just last night I was wondering whether someone's written a hipster music player app that simulates this.  It could also have a 90s mode where the playback skips in response to the accelerometer.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Diver300 on August 12, 2016, 10:10:46 pm
The telly in the hotel room is 17", 4:3
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on August 12, 2016, 10:22:04 pm
And then there was the gradual battery decline as the music slowed down to the point you couldn't bear it.

Interestingly, just last night I was wondering whether someone's written a hipster music player app that simulates this.  It could also have a 90s mode where the playback skips in response to the accelerometer.
That's how The Bristol Sound was created; students lost on the Downs unable to find a shop for new batteries (cos it was past midnight and they'd been hiding in the bushes for weeeeeeeeeeed and badgering (dogging having yet to be invented)) were trying to recreate that sound ten years later. Yes, Beth, we mean you.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on August 13, 2016, 08:59:29 am
Otherwise, have you considered using a stylus?  You can get them for capacitive touchscreens.  Have a blob on the end that simulates a very small finger.  They're a good compromise between the frustration of finger input and faffing about driving a fondleslab with a mouse (and as a bonus, keep the screen smudge-free).

I have one for use with my phone since my stubby peasant fingers can scarcely cope with a fondleslab, never mind the titchy "keys" on the phone (I am not one of those people who believes in mobile phones the size of car number plates, y'see). The only problem with is it this: where do you put it when you're not using it?  ATM it lives in my wallet which, more often than not, is in a different room from the phone.

I imagine that ten minutes after the next-gen Jesusphone hits the shelves some clever bugger in China will be flogging Lightning->3.5mm headphone adaptors, which the Mega-Global Fruit Corporation of Cupertino, USAnia will then replicate at five times the price.

Like so (https://c1.staticflickr.com/9/8025/28843732722_a4eecaf570_b.jpg)?
The acquisition of Beat headphones is no rumour. It has already happened.

I still have one of these:
(https://c1.staticflickr.com/3/2610/3681053629_c084df0bea_o.jpg)
And it works.
Only I don't have any cassettes.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on August 13, 2016, 10:39:28 am
Sorry, I only meant that Apple ditching the 3.5mm socket was a rumour.

As Beats is a Monster-Cable-Esque example of celeb-centered marketing over objective quality, I can't imagine Apple bundling some Beats-branded headphones with the next iPhone. Similarly, I'm sure there'll be lightning-3.5mm dongles, but I can't imagine Apple bundling one in the box either. Not when then can charge  £15 for it.

My bet is on lightning headphones in the box, and an optional-extra Apple branded headphones.


The only problem with is it this: where do you put it when you're not using it?  ATM it lives in my wallet which, more often than not, is in a different room from the phone.

Mother Dibdib has one on a little string with - ironically - a headphone jack on the end, so it lives attached to her phone (like so (http://www.tomtop.com/other-tablet-accessories-62/p-pa1271.html?currency=GBP&lang=en&aid=gplagb&gclid=CI-1-paMvs4CFdIV0wodxpsHiA)).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on August 13, 2016, 11:13:29 am
Talking to the course leader for a music production degree, he said that should someone turn up with a pair of Beats, they will be pointed at and laughed at.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on August 13, 2016, 11:31:09 am
The only problem with is it this: where do you put it when you're not using it?  ATM it lives in my wallet which, more often than not, is in a different room from the phone.

Mother Dibdib has one on a little string with - ironically - a headphone jack on the end, so it lives attached to her phone (like so (http://www.tomtop.com/other-tablet-accessories-62/p-pa1271.html?currency=GBP&lang=en&aid=gplagb&gclid=CI-1-paMvs4CFdIV0wodxpsHiA)).

So, I now discover, has mine.  Thank you, Sirrah!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on August 13, 2016, 01:05:03 pm
The only problem with is it this: where do you put it when you're not using it?  ATM it lives in my wallet which, more often than not, is in a different room from the phone.

Mother Dibdib has one on a little string with - ironically - a headphone jack on the end, so it lives attached to her phone (like so (http://www.tomtop.com/other-tablet-accessories-62/p-pa1271.html?currency=GBP&lang=en&aid=gplagb&gclid=CI-1-paMvs4CFdIV0wodxpsHiA)).

That's wrong on so many levels.  And not just because it looks like a cyberpunk Tampax.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on August 13, 2016, 01:07:24 pm
Otherwise, have you considered using a stylus?  You can get them for capacitive touchscreens.  Have a blob on the end that simulates a very small finger.  They're a good compromise between the frustration of finger input and faffing about driving a fondleslab with a mouse (and as a bonus, keep the screen smudge-free).

I have one for use with my phone since my stubby peasant fingers can scarcely cope with a fondleslab, never mind the titchy "keys" on the phone (I am not one of those people who believes in mobile phones the size of car number plates, y'see). The only problem with is it this: where do you put it when you're not using it?  ATM it lives in my wallet which, more often than not, is in a different room from the phone.

I imagine that ten minutes after the next-gen Jesusphone hits the shelves some clever bugger in China will be flogging Lightning->3.5mm headphone adaptors, which the Mega-Global Fruit Corporation of Cupertino, USAnia will then replicate at five times the price.

Like so (https://c1.staticflickr.com/9/8025/28843732722_a4eecaf570_b.jpg)?
The acquisition of Beat headphones is no rumour. It has already happened.

I still have one of these:
(https://c1.staticflickr.com/3/2610/3681053629_c084df0bea_o.jpg)
And it works.
Only I don't have any cassettes.

I think my partner has the cassettes, some blank and some of which contain recordings of performances of music he composed, but his DAT Walkman has died....

... Maybe we should meet up when all parties have the time and tuits.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: barakta on August 13, 2016, 04:38:16 pm
The only problem with is it this: where do you put it when you're not using it?  ATM it lives in my wallet which, more often than not, is in a different room from the phone.

Mother Dibdib has one on a little string with - ironically - a headphone jack on the end, so it lives attached to her phone (like so (http://www.tomtop.com/other-tablet-accessories-62/p-pa1271.html?currency=GBP&lang=en&aid=gplagb&gclid=CI-1-paMvs4CFdIV0wodxpsHiA)).

That's wrong on so many levels.  And not just because it looks like a cyberpunk Tampax.

I thought it looked like a buttplug... Can I blame having been at BiCon in the last week?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on August 13, 2016, 05:13:57 pm
The only problem with is it this: where do you put it when you're not using it?  ATM it lives in my wallet which, more often than not, is in a different room from the phone.

Mother Dibdib has one on a little string with - ironically - a headphone jack on the end, so it lives attached to her phone (like so (http://www.tomtop.com/other-tablet-accessories-62/p-pa1271.html?currency=GBP&lang=en&aid=gplagb&gclid=CI-1-paMvs4CFdIV0wodxpsHiA)).

That's wrong on so many levels.  And not just because it looks like a cyberpunk Tampax.

I thought it looked like a buttplug... Can I blame having been at BiCon in the last week?

Someone pass the mind bleach please!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on August 13, 2016, 10:45:20 pm
The only problem with is it this: where do you put it when you're not using it?  ATM it lives in my wallet which, more often than not, is in a different room from the phone.

Mother Dibdib has one on a little string with - ironically - a headphone jack on the end, so it lives attached to her phone (like so (http://www.tomtop.com/other-tablet-accessories-62/p-pa1271.html?currency=GBP&lang=en&aid=gplagb&gclid=CI-1-paMvs4CFdIV0wodxpsHiA)).

That's wrong on so many levels.  And not just because it looks like a cyberpunk Tampax.

I thought it looked like a buttplug... Can I blame having been at BiCon in the last week?

What happens at BiCon , stays at BiCon.....
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: barakta on August 13, 2016, 11:01:49 pm
Heh, if only you knew ;)

Admittedly my friends are all a lot more boring than they were 10 years ago when young. 

I have however always been square and boring, even at BiCons.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on August 13, 2016, 11:49:14 pm
Heh, if only you knew ;)

Admittedly my friends are all a lot more boring than they were 10 years ago when young. 

I have however always been square and boring, even at BiCons.

You are many things, but never boring!  :-*
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on August 27, 2016, 10:43:46 am
It's the end of civilisation as we know it (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2016/08/25/mcc-members-told-not-to-pop-hazardous-champagne-corks-from-stand/)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on August 27, 2016, 01:47:55 pm
Pick of the Pops on R2 is playing Jasper Carrott's Funky Moped.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on August 30, 2016, 12:58:56 pm
Hotel room interior designers: plz to not be putting the air-con wossname directly next to the desk (or vice-versa).  My left elbow will never be the same again.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tim Hall on August 30, 2016, 01:53:39 pm
I left my cafetiere-combined-with-a-mug at home, having taken it from work to the weekend's Rutland expedition.

This means I'm stuck with instant brown drink at work.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on September 01, 2016, 08:08:31 pm
The agony of a zit so deep inside the ear that it can't be squeezed.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on September 02, 2016, 09:07:11 am
Water based eggshell is crap not very good.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on September 06, 2016, 12:56:03 am
Not only is it 104 deg F outside but the Burlington, Northern & Santa Fe appear to be sending a giant economy size goods train, complete with up to five diesel locos, past the window every ten minutes >:(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on September 06, 2016, 09:12:43 am
Not only is it 104 deg F outside but the Burlington, Northern & Santa Fe appear to be sending a giant economy size goods train, complete with up to five diesel locos, past the window every ten minutes >:(

Do they hoot hoot hooooooot? I kind of like that noise, but for the sixth train in succession rolling across the bridge by my hotel in the middle of the night, I was getting in the mood for a derailin'

I pitied anyone near the the new downtown Denver to Airport train. The driver was constantly blowing the bloody thing, combined with constant bells. They could hear that bloody train in Yellowstone.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on September 06, 2016, 03:25:40 pm
Fortunately no hooting here, but the westbound ones are grinding up a noticeable slope from bridge over the Mighty Colorado and consequently tend to open the taps quite wide.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tigerrr on September 07, 2016, 07:14:40 am
Imagine you are in Fulsom Jail.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: T42 on September 07, 2016, 08:19:46 am
Dang, that's started my earworm for the day.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on September 07, 2016, 03:30:15 pm
I am disgruntled that tonight I have to choose between Andy Murray playing tennis, Coronation Street, Bake-Off, The Last Leg and the Paralympics opening ceremony. It's very badly organised.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on September 07, 2016, 03:38:06 pm
There was one yesterday morning with six locos.  And very squeaky brakes >:(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on September 07, 2016, 03:44:14 pm
I rather like railway sounds, having grown up with a railway at the bottom of the garden. Trains on that line were about one every hour though.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on September 07, 2016, 08:43:34 pm
There was one yesterday morning with six locos.  And very squeaky brakes >:(

I rather like railway sounds, having grown up with a railway at the bottom of the garden. Trains on that line were about one every hour though.

Ask Tiermat about a night's stay in a chain hotel in Lens. Less than 200 metres from the main TGV line. You could hear them coming about 10-12 miles away (c.5mins). The noise rose to a crescendo and took another 5 minutes to recede into the night. EVERY half hour. Somewhat bleary eyed at breakfast next morning . . .
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on September 07, 2016, 09:08:40 pm
When we first moved to London, our ground floor flat in West Ealing had the west coast mainline at the bottom of the garden. And the Heathrow flight path overhead. After a time, we stopped noticing it, even though we'd automatically pause conversations each time an outbound Intercity 125 accelerated past.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mattc on September 08, 2016, 07:23:46 am
When we first moved to London, our ground floor flat in West Ealing had the west coast mainline at the bottom of the garden. And the Heathrow flight path overhead. After a time, we stopped noticing it, even though we'd automatically pause conversations each time an outbound Intercity 125 accelerated past.

Jake Blues: How often does the train go by?
Elwood Blues: So often you don't even notice it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: LittleWheelsandBig on September 08, 2016, 07:54:08 am
My doctor sends me one espresso every day, to keep me happy in hospital. It is always from Starbucks.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on September 15, 2016, 07:26:58 pm
In the pub this evening I am being subjected yo MTV.

*makes mental note to check Human Rights legislation as well as the Geneva Convention*
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on September 16, 2016, 12:14:27 am
I am currently making my eighteenth seventeenth attempt in the last three hours to download a 48 MB file.  None of the previous sixteen seventeen has even got close to halfway before crapping out.  FFS, how can people actually live like this ???
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: pcolbeck on September 16, 2016, 08:22:40 am
I forgot to switch the coffee peculator on before taking the dog for a walk. Now I will have to wait 5 minutes for my coffee.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on September 16, 2016, 09:11:52 am
I forgot set the coffee pot to six cups, so six cups of water went through on four. It's set to strong so the results aren't quite as a bad as American coffee, but still it's not the caffeine-jolt I need on a Friday morning.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on September 16, 2016, 10:06:30 am
In the pub this evening I am being subjected yo MTV.

*makes mental note to check Human Rights legislation as well as the Geneva Convention*
So down wit da yoof, Andrij.  :)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on September 20, 2016, 07:50:18 pm
Melted the arm of one of my favourite purple Rab fleece on the oven element :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ElyDave on September 20, 2016, 09:44:37 pm
My doctor sends me one espresso every day, to keep me happy in hospital. It is always from Starbucks.

Oh, the humanity!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: pcolbeck on September 22, 2016, 11:26:51 am
https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2016/sep/21/missed-flight-easyjet-apple-icalendar
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rafletcher on September 22, 2016, 12:03:21 pm
https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2016/sep/21/missed-flight-easyjet-apple-icalendar

That was the subject originally of a "money problems" letter to the G last saturday. What an oaf, I thought.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mattc on September 22, 2016, 12:15:54 pm
I reckon the Guardian money problems section could be a very very rich seam for this thread ...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on October 10, 2016, 08:43:27 am
Deciding which of 8 watches to wear....
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on October 10, 2016, 11:44:47 am
Deciding which of 8 watches to wear....
Choose the one that will make you arrive at work on time.  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on October 10, 2016, 01:53:26 pm
Deciding which of 8 watches to wear....
Choose the one that will make you arrive at work on time.  :thumbsup:

With 8 watches, he can't have a clue what time it is...   ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on October 10, 2016, 02:34:16 pm
With eight watches, it can be whatever time he wants it to be.  :D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pingu on October 11, 2016, 01:08:36 pm
Deciding which of 8 watches to wear....

How long is your forearm?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: pcolbeck on October 18, 2016, 11:56:02 am
The fruit plat from our weekly bread club disinterested in the toaster and it was really fiddly to fish the pieces out.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: orienteer on October 22, 2016, 10:02:56 am
Due to an overstocked cupboard, my jar of coffee beans fell out and sent the double-walled, stainless steel cafetiere floorwards. It now has a dent in the bottom which prevents it standing squarely.

I think I managed to collect every spilled coffee bean, each one must be worth 1p.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Diver300 on October 22, 2016, 04:55:19 pm
To get my telly to search for "The Big Bang Theory" I have to say "The Big Bang Theory" to the remote/microphone, simply "Big Bang Theory" doesn't work.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on October 23, 2016, 01:47:52 am
On this  visit to our colonial estates I'm driving quite a bit - but do not have exclusive use of any of the familial motorcars. I'm not sure how many more times I can cope with having to adjust mirrors when I get behind the wheel.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tigerrr on October 23, 2016, 08:34:35 am
I ordered a delivery of nespresso pods. Oh what a shock, I have mistakenly ordered the decaf ones. What's the point of carrying on?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on October 23, 2016, 09:23:28 am
On this  visit to our colonial estates I'm driving quite a bit - but do not have exclusive use of any of the familial motorcars. I'm not sure how many more times I can cope with having to adjust mirrors when I get behind the wheel.

Of course the clever buggers at Melmoth Motors or somesuch have thought of this and thus each driver can be issued with an induhvidual key1 programmed to jibble seat, mirrors and steering wheel to said driver's preference.

1: Although it's likely to not be an actual bit of wiggly pot-metal in these Modern Times.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on October 25, 2016, 07:32:05 pm
Deciding which of 8 watches to wear....

(https://scontent-iad3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/14724633_1152118404864688_63613962807634855_n.png?oh=6f6d01b97eff94fa34fdd38754c0d497&oe=589105A6)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on October 25, 2016, 08:00:45 pm
I have **SO** nicked that!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on October 25, 2016, 11:32:31 pm
(http://www.godhaven.org.uk/blogimages/spiv.jpg)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on October 26, 2016, 12:18:02 am
(http://www.godhaven.org.uk/blogimages/spiv.jpg)

I've met him!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on October 26, 2016, 06:13:36 am
When?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on October 26, 2016, 12:03:37 pm
In the mirror?

 :D


Runs, far and fast...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on October 26, 2016, 03:48:23 pm
When?

At a Chap Olympiad in London, don't recall which one (Viv the Spiv (http://www.vivthespiv.co.uk/) is often in attendance).
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Legs on October 27, 2016, 02:56:27 pm
I have a copy of the Chap Manifesto signed by Gustav and Vic...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on October 27, 2016, 05:53:39 pm
My chum Meestah Blah wrote the SCIENCE for the Sheridan Club forum, based on characters created by himself and, ironically, my grate frend Uncle Marvo, the celebrated aqua-pikey and total non-Chap.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on November 03, 2016, 01:35:31 pm
The Nesspresso machine in my hotel room didn't pierce the capsule meaning I just had a thimble size helping of hot water
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on November 03, 2016, 03:32:40 pm
I dropped my ancient Aiwa radiogram remote and now it doesn't work so I have to spin around and scoot my office chair half a metre across to manually work the dials. It's so tiring.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PaulF on November 07, 2016, 10:30:15 am
With my planned trips this year I'm going to be 5 points short of regaining a Silver card :(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: tiermat on November 09, 2016, 10:35:25 am
I am heading down to London today, on the train.

I am in first class and the coffee is stewed!!! How am I going to survive a 2 hour journey on that?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on November 09, 2016, 10:43:07 am
Have alerted the UNHCR and the Yanks have gone to DefCon II.

They've promised to take it back to 4 if you can score a decent Americano by lunchtime . . .
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on November 09, 2016, 11:08:43 am
Have alerted the UNHCR and the Yanks have gone to DefCon II.

They've promised to take it back to 4 if you can score a decent Americano by lunchtime . . .

The yanks are at DefCon 4 for an entirely different reason - somebody GUFFed ...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on November 09, 2016, 01:30:36 pm
Twitter post

'Post Brexit, no one thought it'd be possible to out-stupid Britain.
But you know America. Never one to back down from a challenge!'
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on November 14, 2016, 05:19:07 pm
Itchy, itchy sunburn.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rogerzilla on November 14, 2016, 08:50:00 pm
The soft close on the new toilet seat is a little slow.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on November 15, 2016, 08:57:53 am
The soft close on the new toilet seat is a little slow.

Partner detested new soft close seat in bathroom so much that we swapped it to downstairs loo, which he seldom uses.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on November 15, 2016, 10:08:32 am
You don't have to watch them close, they can be safely left to do so on their own. They don't, to the best of my knowledge, start flapping around like Adele's gob and blasting out curiously mid-Atlantic vocalised middle of the everything songs, or for that matter, demonically warbling like they've been possessed by the spirit of Whitney Houston. Imagine that, if Whitney Houston possessed your bog. Actually, I just did. It's a not a good place.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mattc on November 15, 2016, 10:21:11 am
...

 Imagine that, if Whitney Houston possessed your bog. Actually, I just did. It's a not a good place.

Definitely a 1st World Problem!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on November 15, 2016, 01:09:07 pm
Not only has Mr Sainsbury's House Of Toothy Comestibles stopped selling its somewhat nomworthy Pean & Mushroom Masala and Channa Masala altogether, but today they were out of Tadka Dahl as well.  And they've just introduced a new fleet of trolleys on which the handles are All Wrong.

God, modern life is rubbish, isn't it >:(
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on November 15, 2016, 01:43:00 pm
...

 Imagine that, if Whitney Houston possessed your bog. Actually, I just did. It's a not a good place.

Definitely a 1st World Problem!

Quite scarily, while I wandered around the bathroom earlier warbling 'I will always haunt your loo-oooo-oo', the spotlight above the toilet started to flicker uncannily. As I'm on vacation today, I'm tempted to pen a script for The Conjuring 3.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on November 15, 2016, 02:29:56 pm
the spotlight above the toilet

Same lighting designer as the University of [REDACTED FOR LEGAL REASONS]?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on November 15, 2016, 03:35:05 pm
Standard in-ceiling downlighter thingummy. I don't poo as performance art. Not even on a haunted toilet. Seems to have stopped flickering which will be good as I no idea how to replace it.

I bet the Japanese have toilets with an auto-exorcism feature for just this sort of eventuality.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on November 15, 2016, 03:39:50 pm
Why is the bathroom the only part of an hotel bedroom that has a tolerable level of illumination?
I do not do dim!

Holiday Inn: your rooms are just too gloomy!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: LEE on November 15, 2016, 03:54:41 pm
The soft close on the new toilet seat is a little slow.

Partner detested new soft close seat in bathroom so much that we swapped it to downstairs loo, which he seldom uses.

I don't mind them but, like soft-close cupboard doors, they have you slamming everything else, without a damped mechanism, like you lost your temper.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on November 15, 2016, 04:39:33 pm
Why is the bathroom the only part of an hotel bedroom that has a tolerable level of illumination?
I do not do dim!

Holiday Inn: your rooms are just too gloomy!

You'd probably not like the place (https://www.designhotels.com/hotels/germany/frankfurt/roomers) I recently stayed in Frankfurt then. I was never sure if I was about turn on the light or set off the fire alarm.

Any hotel room offers ten minutes of delight figuring out which combination of switches turn on the right lights. Sometimes I just give up and go to the bar.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on November 15, 2016, 04:50:22 pm
"a futuristic wonder"?! It looks like 1982!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Feanor on November 15, 2016, 06:27:05 pm
Dark hotel rooms seem to be in fashion.

I've stayed at a few Malmaisons recently, and they are all dark as dark thing.
Like grubbing about on the floor with a phone as a torch looking for dropped objects.

The Dakota in South Queensferry was the same.
It was so dark, you couldn't find any of the controls on the wall for heating or lighting without a torch.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hatler on November 15, 2016, 06:32:38 pm

Any hotel room offers ten minutes of delight figuring out which combination of switches turn on the right lights. Sometimes I just give up and go to the bar.
I stayed in a place in Joburg where the chap who showed me to my room offered to show me where everything was.

It can't be that complicated I thought.

The button to rise the telly out of its box was hidden behind a curtain at the head of the bed.

I'm afraid to say that I manually lifted the thing out of its box and perched it, precariously, diagonally across the top of the box.

When I finally worked out where the button was, it wasn't working. Not sure if I buggered it or not.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on November 15, 2016, 06:56:32 pm
I think the dark hides a messy variety of sins. Not places for a blacklight, unless you want a gratuitous Jackson Pollock. The 'do not disturb' sign was 'don't be a knockin', because the bed be a rockin'. Crude, lewd, and worth it just for look painted on the faces of some of church attendin' and god-be-a-defendin' US colleagues. I think the mothership booked them in for laffs.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rogerzilla on November 15, 2016, 07:27:25 pm
Three rules of life:

Keep your daughter away from red lights.
Keep your son away from flashing blue lights.
Keep your computer chair away from UV light.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mattc on November 15, 2016, 07:31:03 pm
Why is the bathroom the only part of an hotel bedroom that has a tolerable level of illumination?
I do not do dim!

Holiday Inn: your rooms are just too gloomy!
I found ours about right.   That may be because at home I am constantly maddened by the low-energy bulbs (that result in me squinting at everything for 2 minutes) - so "normal" lighting seems a wonderous invention!

It was also the first place I've stayed for a while without this problem:
Any hotel room offers ten minutes of delight figuring out which combination of switches turn on the right lights. Sometimes I just give up and go to the bar.
It just had bedside lights [with their own switches] and a sort-of-Standard-Lamp, with a nice foot-switch! So everything made sense.

Lacking a "main" ceiling light might be what infuriated Helly, but kept the switching simple.


God I'm easily pleased these days ...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on November 15, 2016, 10:59:04 pm
Room-mate was very good about operating the light switches.
A standard lamp with a foot-operated switch in the only wheelchair accessible room shows typical lack of joined-up thinking.
The room was BIG. There was a ceiling light in the room entrance, the dim standard lamp, a small flexible desk lap and the bedside lights.
The bedside shelves were small big enough for spectacles and a phone but there would not have been space for a denture pot...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on November 15, 2016, 11:20:51 pm
Bogies.

Do they go in the Food Waste bin, Rubbish or General Recycling?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on November 16, 2016, 12:36:57 am
That would be rubbish so they can breed for two weeks before being taken away.
I do wish the bin men would either empty the food bin properly or close the lid to stop the local cats getting a second breakfast.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on November 16, 2016, 09:44:20 am

Any hotel room offers ten minutes of delight figuring out which combination of switches turn on the right lights. Sometimes I just give up and go to the bar.
I stayed in a place in Joburg where the chap who showed me to my room offered to show me where everything was.

It can't be that complicated I thought.

The button to rise the telly out of its box was hidden behind a curtain at the head of the bed.

I'm afraid to say that I manually lifted the thing out of its box and perched it, precariously, diagonally across the top of the box.

When I finally worked out where the button was, it wasn't working. Not sure if I buggered it or not.

That's the other thing about hotel rooms, the level of sophistication correlates strongly with the level of broke. So you'll spend hours faffing before giving up and sitting in the dark. See also, wifi. I do like it in developing world hotels where the chap enthusiastically explains everything. Like the sink and toilet. I typically have a fair understanding of how those things work. At least you get your dollar's worth.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mattc on November 16, 2016, 10:36:51 am
Room-mate was very good about operating the light switches.
A standard lamp with a foot-operated switch in the only wheelchair accessible room shows typical lack of joined-up thinking.
The room was BIG. There was a ceiling light in the room entrance, the dim standard lamp, a small flexible desk lap and the bedside lights.

So basically, you're complaining about having a room much bigger than the rest of us had. ;)

(I did think about wheelchairs just after posting that comment about the foot-switch  :facepalm:  )
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: LittleWheelsandBig on November 16, 2016, 10:54:30 am
For accuracy, the floor-switch was fairly easily operated by a crutch. It still would have been nice to be able to see the floor without wandering into the darkness for multiple light switches.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mrcharly-YHT on November 16, 2016, 11:04:35 am
I stayed in a hotel last weekend where you could have ridden a velocipede around the bathroom, let alone around the four-poster bed.
The sad thing was, due to arriving v late and having to get out and busy I had no time to appreciate any of the luxuries.
Did get a v. nice breakfast, though.

Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on November 16, 2016, 11:49:31 am
Any hotel room offers ten minutes of delight figuring out which combination of switches turn on the right lights. Sometimes I just give up and go to the bar.

Clearly Sir's choice of caravanserai is insufficiently pikey.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on November 16, 2016, 12:27:09 pm
I've just run out of mince pies.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on November 16, 2016, 01:24:07 pm
Room-mate was very good about operating the light switches.
A standard lamp with a foot-operated switch in the only wheelchair accessible room shows typical lack of joined-up thinking.
The room was BIG. There was a ceiling light in the room entrance, the dim standard lamp, a small flexible desk lap and the bedside lights.

So basically, you're complaining about having a room much bigger than the rest of us had. ;)

(I did think about wheelchairs just after posting that comment about the foot-switch  :facepalm:  )

A BIG chamber with no more lights than a standard room is VERY dark.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on November 17, 2016, 11:25:05 am
A robotic female voice rudely interrupted me while I was listening to some Joe Hisaishi and spreadsheeting some spreadsheets to tell me that the batteries in my Bluetooth headset are low. Now I'm having to - gulp - listen to my co-workers while they charge.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: CAMRAMan on November 18, 2016, 11:25:31 am
My usual supplier of Monsoon Malabar coffee beans must have problems, as they are currently offering them at £99.99 on their site. So I've had to find another supplier AND pay 50p/Kg extra.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on November 19, 2016, 12:36:06 pm
I could do with getting something to eat, but there's a snoozy cat on my knee.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on November 20, 2016, 11:31:24 pm
Whatever happened to gravy browning?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pingu on November 20, 2016, 11:49:33 pm
The Dakota in South Queensferry was the same.
It was so dark, you couldn't find any of the controls on the wall for heating or lighting without a torch.

Ditto the Dakota in Glasgow Eurocentral, unsurprisingly.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Legs on November 21, 2016, 08:56:24 am
Whatever happened to gravy browning?
Um, did it magically migrate out of the bottle and drip down onto the bottom of the cupboard, despite there not being any discernible spillage when you used it?

Never had any difficulty buying it  :-\
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on November 21, 2016, 11:27:07 am
... at home I am constantly maddened by the low-energy bulbs (that result in me squinting at everything for 2 minutes) ...

Could you replace your low energy bulbs at home with ones of higher rating?   The idea of low energy is of course to use less energy to get a similar result, not to take you back to the dark ages.   :)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on November 21, 2016, 12:23:09 pm
... at home I am constantly maddened by the low-energy bulbs (that result in me squinting at everything for 2 minutes) ...

Could you replace your low energy bulbs at home with ones of higher rating?   The idea of low energy is of course to use less energy to get a similar result, not to take you back to the dark ages.   :)

It's quality of light, not just quantity. The grey drear emitted by CFLs is thankfully being replaced by LED lamps (which might be too bright and blue for some).

CFLs are SAD in a box...

Incandescent lamps might have used much energy but the light quality was better.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: spesh on November 21, 2016, 12:52:10 pm
... at home I am constantly maddened by the low-energy bulbs (that result in me squinting at everything for 2 minutes) ...

Could you replace your low energy bulbs at home with ones of higher rating?   The idea of low energy is of course to use less energy to get a similar result, not to take you back to the dark ages.   :)

It's quality of light, not just quantity. The grey drear emitted by CFLs is thankfully being replaced by LED lamps (which might be too bright and blue for some).

CFLs are SAD in a box...

Incandescent lamps might have used much energy but the light quality was better.

Part of the problem with CFLs is that their output in lumens falls off over their service life, whereas an incandescent filament lamp stays pretty much the same until it burns out. Also, the Energy Savings Trust was recommending lower wattage CFLs to replace filament lamps than equivalent bodies elsewhere were doing. ISTR reading an article on low-energy lighting a few years ago which said that the EST was advising fitting CFLs with one fifth/sixth the power of the filament bulb, whereas the recommendation in the rest of the EU was one third/fourth the original power level. Basically, the EST was target fixated on the power consumption, at the expense of maintaining light output, hence the complaints from users about Stygian gloom.

With LEDs increasing in usage as they have become more cost effective, the advice now concentrates more on choosing lamps based on the light output. Funny that...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on November 25, 2016, 05:51:40 pm
The woman who threads my eyebrows is going on maternity leave next week.

This is absolutely terrible.  I just don't know what I'm going to do.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on November 25, 2016, 06:56:42 pm
Chunky eyebrows are in at the moment, I believe.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on November 25, 2016, 07:30:55 pm
Yeah, but you are supposed to have more than one, y'know.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on November 25, 2016, 08:12:40 pm
Do you have them done alternately . . . ?  ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on November 25, 2016, 08:20:33 pm
Yeah, but you are supposed to have more than one, y'know.

Frida Kahlo sported a monobrow.   Be a trendsetter.   :D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on November 25, 2016, 09:00:26 pm
I've got silly looking eyebrows.  One of them grows in the wrong direction.  Any attempt to rectify this makes it look sillier, and frankly life's too short.  They keep water from running in my eyes and allow me to express surprise, which is as much as I can wish for from a set of eyebrows, really.  YEMV, of course.

What was really out of order was the optiquack giving barakta unprompted eyebrow-fettling advice while fitting her glasses.  Particularly as this was immediately after she explained why she'd turned down offers of rhinoplasty and prosthetic ears[1].


[1] Cosmetic ones.  Functional cybernetics don't count.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on November 25, 2016, 09:17:03 pm
What are the last few posts on this thread about, pls?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on November 25, 2016, 09:17:19 pm
Eyebrows.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on November 25, 2016, 10:45:15 pm
Behold the field in which I grow my fucks for having a monobrow.....
.
.
.
.
OTOH wearing specs helps hide it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: closetleftie on November 26, 2016, 09:43:40 am
Eldest Leftie just made himself eggy bread for breakfast. He's quite particular about it: finely chopped parsley, black pepper in the egg mixture, cheese on top once he's done the first flip, lid on to let it melt and so forth. The end results are usually magnificent, to be fair. Then he installs himself on the sofa, forgets the remote. Gets up, turns his back, and our cocker spaniel tucks in.

He's used the last bread in the house. Currently kooking glum scoffing a bowl of shreddies. ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on November 27, 2016, 12:15:33 pm
Cocker fucking spaniel would be in orbit/buried/rehomed if that happened here...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PeteB99 on December 11, 2016, 11:07:55 am
My iPod battery died halfway through my turbo session this morning.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on December 11, 2016, 12:59:45 pm
I've misplaced my mobile phone. It's in the house somewhere and I would call it with the house phone, but I can't remember the number.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Diver300 on December 15, 2016, 04:59:43 pm
An email chain with me in it contained over 5000 instances of ">" as so many emails had been replied to.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on December 15, 2016, 05:03:38 pm
An email chain with me in it contained over 5000 instances of ">" as so many emails had been replied to.

At least they were quoting properly?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rogerzilla on December 15, 2016, 05:52:33 pm
I can't work out whether to do a no.2 in the upstairs or downstairs toilet.  One has an extractor fan but the other has a warmer seat.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: SoreTween on December 18, 2016, 06:04:04 pm
Dear Mr Sainsburys,

I understand why you have ejected herbs and spices from all other vendors from your stores and replaced them with your own brand.  I applaud you for a job done properly, all non Mr S herbs and spices have been ejected and replaced with a completely comprehensive range of your own.  Even the weird stuff that gets used once a decade is covered in your range.

So why on earth did you decide to put it all in jars that don't fit a standard spice jar holder?  What you have succeeded in doing is ensuring I never do my weekly shop on your orange stores whenever there are herbs or spices on the list.   A side effect of your policy is me cursing mightily in isle 6 when I forget and round the corner to see your H&S fatjars.  I believe the kids of today might say Epic Failz.

If you'd introduced a complete and comprehensive set of packaging light refills alongside new ones you'd have won my custom but I will not treat a brand new non-recycleable hereabouts plastic jar as a refill.  I'll just go to the green, blue, other green or one of the yellow options instead.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on December 18, 2016, 06:04:53 pm
Yeah, but do they sell spice racks?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: T42 on December 27, 2016, 10:18:28 am
The missus inflicted one of these on me for Christmas:

https://www.noxgear.com/tracer360

I'll happily wear a hi-viz vest, but tote an extra 200g so as to light up like a frickin' psychedelic octopus? Darlin' dear, it's just not me.

I assume the nox in the URL is short for noxious.

In any case if I used it as suggested the éplucheurs'd** have me for emitting to the rear a light other than red.

**French for peeler, as in potato
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on December 27, 2016, 11:27:26 am
What sort of inconsiderate people give you a full case of wine as a present, when they know you live on the 4th floor & there is no lift ? 


Oh, me back !
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on December 27, 2016, 11:54:48 am
You need one of those block-and-tackle arrangement such as can still be seen in Old Amsterdam, for getting pianos in through the top storey windows.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: andrewc on December 27, 2016, 12:07:24 pm
I've considered one.  Especially for the Thorn Nomad!  Shouldering that up the stairs is leaving me as lopsided as a medieval longbow man!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on December 27, 2016, 01:45:27 pm
Yet another box of assorted chocolates has the 'key' on the bottom of the box.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 27, 2016, 01:51:47 pm
Yet another box of assorted chocolates has the 'key' on the bottom of the box.

Do you have a scanner so you can image this onto a phone or computer?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Andrij on December 27, 2016, 01:55:45 pm
Yet another box of assorted chocolates has the 'key' on the bottom of the box.

Do you have a scanner so you can image this onto a phone or computer?

I guess I could photograph the bottom of the box with my phone or tablet, then use that for reference.  But then I'm cluttering up my devices with photos which are useful for only a very short time and will need to be deleted.  Obviously yet another first world problem.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: CAMRAMan on December 27, 2016, 02:12:11 pm
The soft-close toilet seat isn't so soft-close any more. It makes a bit of a clatter now.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on December 27, 2016, 02:34:27 pm
The BBC seem to have cut a lot out of this afternoon's showing of Raiders of the Lost Ark.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: mattc on December 27, 2016, 02:44:47 pm
Yet another box of assorted chocolates has the 'key' on the bottom of the box.

Do you have a scanner so you can image this onto a phone or computer?

I guess I could photograph the bottom of the box with my phone or tablet, then use that for reference.  But then I'm cluttering up my devices with photos which are useful for only a very short time and will need to be deleted.  Obviously yet another first world problem.
Why on earth would you delete it???
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: T42 on December 27, 2016, 03:19:53 pm
Yet another box of assorted chocolates has the 'key' on the bottom of the box.

Do you have a scanner so you can image this onto a phone or computer?

I guess I could photograph the bottom of the box with my phone or tablet, then use that for reference.  But then I'm cluttering up my devices with photos which are useful for only a very short time and will need to be deleted.  Obviously yet another first world problem.

You need one of those transparent tables with a mirror at 45° underneath that doctors make you stand on when they want to examine the contact areas of your feet.

Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on December 27, 2016, 03:39:40 pm
Yet another box of assorted chocolates has the 'key' on the bottom of the box.

Do you have a scanner so you can image this onto a phone or computer?

I guess I could photograph the bottom of the box with my phone or tablet, then use that for reference.  But then I'm cluttering up my devices with photos which are useful for only a very short time and will need to be deleted.  Obviously yet another first world problem.

You need one of those transparent tables with a mirror at 45° underneath that doctors make you stand on when they want to examine the contact areas of your feet.

You could image box before opening or if securely closed...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on December 27, 2016, 05:43:27 pm
Just tip the fecking chocolates into a bowl!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on December 28, 2016, 09:57:29 am
Lobster tails were rubbery!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on December 28, 2016, 12:42:46 pm
Lobster tails were rubbery!

"Hank u verr muhh"
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jock Stewart on December 28, 2016, 06:25:11 pm
Went to my brother-in-law for Xmas. Was offered Prosecco instead of proper champagne. Had to drink the red wine instead.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Diver300 on January 17, 2017, 05:45:58 pm
There is no power to the 230 V sockets in Standard Premier class on Eurostar, and no WiFi

The free wine was in plastic bottle and the train is only going at 168 mph
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on January 17, 2017, 06:23:51 pm
Driver of Miss von Brandenburg's Eurostar from Brussels yesterday had his foot down, though, coz it arrived about ten minutes early :thumbsup:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on January 18, 2017, 03:29:27 pm
When you've been wearing a beanie hat all day and you take it off to find that your hair is lying in the opposite direction to usual and it feels weird.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: phantasmagoriana on January 19, 2017, 02:19:05 pm
Waitrose has a spinach shortage.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jakob W on January 19, 2017, 05:11:31 pm
Spinach, aubergine, and courgettes are all supposed to be in short supply after poor harvests in Spain aren't they?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on January 19, 2017, 11:41:59 pm
Spinach, aubergine, and courgettes are all supposed to be in short supply after poor harvests in Spain aren't they?

Indeed!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Clare on January 19, 2017, 11:54:01 pm
Spinach, aubergine, and courgettes are all supposed to be in short supply after poor harvests in Spain aren't they?

and how is this a problem?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on January 20, 2017, 12:12:38 am
Spinach, aubergine, and courgettes are all supposed to be in short supply after poor harvests in Spain aren't they?

and how is this a problem?

I wasn't going to say it...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ElyDave on January 20, 2017, 07:21:23 am
Hooray for the aubergine shortage!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jakob W on January 20, 2017, 11:25:42 am
Because ratatouille?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Clare on January 20, 2017, 11:43:53 am
Because ratatouille?

and how is this a problem?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: trekker12 on January 20, 2017, 11:44:46 am
There is always the option of eating foods that are actually in season in January but that appears to be a concept lost on supermarkets.





and I don't like sprouts
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: geraldc on January 20, 2017, 12:31:24 pm
The point about living in the first world is that we can what we like when we like. I think there are quite a few hippies wandering into this thread by mistake. This is a thread for Leadbetter type problems, you Good types need to find your own thread.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on January 20, 2017, 12:33:27 pm
The only vegetable that I like which still only appears 'in season' is the broadbean.

Sprouts may be seasonal, but I wouldn't know.  Hate them.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on January 20, 2017, 12:36:25 pm
There is always the option of eating foods that are actually in season in January but that appears to be a concept lost on supermarkets.





and I don't like sprouts

Burns night approaches; have a haggis, tatties and neeps!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: SoreTween on January 20, 2017, 06:06:20 pm
and I don't like sprouts
Try them halved or quartered and fried in butter, very different and very nice.  If you're feeing posh grate a bit of nutmeg over them while cooking.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on January 21, 2017, 11:45:06 am
I won't miss aubergines because they're vegetablized ennui. I do like courgettes though. Yes, we could rely on seasonal, local produce, but turnips are a terrible fruit.

I'm enjoying sprouts (as statements go, the wrong-o-meter is the red) – as others have said, the trick is to avoid boiling them. Sliced and sauted, halved and roasted, that kind of thing. I think you can (and should) apply this logic to all the brassicas.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Efrogwr on January 21, 2017, 11:36:04 pm

...turnips are a terrible fruit.


... Is a great book title!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: trekker12 on January 23, 2017, 02:37:32 pm
The point about living in the first world is that we can what we like when we like. I think there are quite a few hippies wandering into this thread by mistake. This is a thread for Leadbetter type problems, you Good types need to find your own thread.

Fair point
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: trekker12 on January 23, 2017, 02:37:57 pm
and I don't like sprouts
Try them halved or quartered and fried in butter, very different and very nice.  If you're feeing posh grate a bit of nutmeg over them while cooking.

Nope, still horrible
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: LEE on January 23, 2017, 02:44:38 pm
I've got a cold.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: barakta on January 23, 2017, 02:50:40 pm
I agree, sprouts are horrid.

I believe there are two genes which control for sprout like/hate, one is linked to tasting the nasty at all and the other is how they are cooked I believe.

http://www.nature.com/news/2006/060918/full/news060918-1.html
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on January 23, 2017, 06:17:20 pm
I love sprouts.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Gattopardo on January 23, 2017, 06:51:07 pm
I hate sprouts,  I did like them once.  The sprouts were cooked in bacon or lardons with sliced shallots.

Then throw away the sprouts.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Canardly on January 23, 2017, 07:33:12 pm
Had mini sprouts in butter with shallots and garlic last night. Delicious! The steak was a teensy weensy bit overdone. Can never find frozen  potato balls Pommes Noisettes when you need them, had to make do with Duchess.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jurek on January 23, 2017, 10:10:27 pm
I love farting.
Send me all of your unwanted sprouts.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on January 23, 2017, 10:25:42 pm
How about mushy peas? Proper farting tackle . . .
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jakob W on January 23, 2017, 10:50:03 pm
I'm a big fan of all the brassicas, and also the leafy bitter greens, but my OH can't stand them; I think this is a non-supertaster/supertaster divide that won't ever be bridged.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on January 24, 2017, 12:20:45 am
I'm a big fan of all the brassicas, and also the leafy bitter greens, but my OH can't stand them; I think this is a non-supertaster/supertaster divide that won't ever be bridged.

I dunno, given advanced gene therapy it might one day be possible for anyone to appreciate the mingingness of sprouts.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on January 24, 2017, 12:47:50 am
My local Sainsbury's Online appears to have run out of vegetarian haggis and it's not even Burns' Night.

This is only a First World problem because posh people only eat haggis on special occasions...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Torslanda on January 24, 2017, 01:44:13 am
My local Sainsbury's Online appears to have run out of vegetarian haggis and it's not even Burns' Night.

This is only a First World problem because posh people only eat haggis on special occasions...

FTFY...
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on January 24, 2017, 09:15:16 am
I'm a big fan of all the brassicas, and also the leafy bitter greens, but my OH can't stand them; I think this is a non-supertaster/supertaster divide that won't ever be bridged.

I dunno, given advanced gene therapy it might one day be possible for anyone to appreciate the mingingness of sprouts.

CRISPR is your friend. I confess to being a brassica addict (and as I spent years disassembling their biochemistry and genetics I can bore anyone about why they taste like they do). Cauliflower wins all vegetables. Brassicas, not even sprouts, don't really make me fart (though I confess the stink of boiling brassicas is unpleasant). Beans*, which I also love, however lead to painfully seismic cheek wobbling to the extent I can't eat them.

*broad, flageolet, haricot, and butter beans excepted – lentils, kidney beans, etc. and the results are nuclear.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on January 24, 2017, 12:47:12 pm
Good heavens!
To lock or unlock the door on this little rented Fiat van i have to insert the key into the lock.
Then I have to turn it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on January 24, 2017, 12:59:36 pm
My local Sainsbury's Online appears to have run out of vegetarian haggis and it's not even Burns' Night.

This is only a First World problem because English people only eat haggis on special occasions...

FTFY...
FTFbothofY

CRISPR is your friend. I confess to being a brassica addict (and as I spent years disassembling their biochemistry and genetics I can bore anyone about why they taste like they do). Cauliflower wins all vegetables. Brassicas, not even sprouts, don't really make me fart (though I confess the stink of boiling brassicas is unpleasant).
Cauliflower is really boring unless curried or smothered in cheesy cheese sauce with all the cheese. But you can stop it stinking while boiling it by adding a splash of milk to the water.

I like risotto, but if I like it better if I put wine in the stock, but I don't really drink much these days so then I have leftover wine that goes off unless I make risotto every other night until it's all gone, so maybe I should try buying those tiny bottles of wine, or maybe a box, but that might be naff.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: spesh on January 24, 2017, 01:16:56 pm
I like risotto, but if I like it better if I put wine in the stock, but I don't really drink much these days so then I have leftover wine that goes off unless I make risotto every other night until it's all gone, so maybe I should try buying those tiny bottles of wine, or maybe a box, but that might be naff.

Just get the 1/3-size bottles of cooking wine from the herbs and spices section in the supermarket. Price per unit volume is no more expensive than the cheaper half-decent bottles, and there's less wastage.

If you can, get the ones from Sainsbury's as they use glass bottles so you can use a vacuum stopper if you've got one.
Morrisons use plastic bottles, so they need to be kept in the fridge, or used in one go, depending on what you're cooking.

HTH.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: LEE on January 24, 2017, 01:21:25 pm
Why do people say that sprouts are horrid as if it's the people who love them that are in the wrong?

I dislike folk music but I appreciate that there must be merit in it, and that it's my lack of taste that is at fault, not the music*


*This is not actually true, Folk music is shit, but you get my point.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on January 24, 2017, 01:58:39 pm
Good heavens!
To lock or unlock the door on this little rented Fiat van i have to insert the key into the lock.
Then I have to turn it.

The "FFS Italian electrics" thread is over in Vroom.  Probably.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on January 24, 2017, 02:06:56 pm
Why do people say that sprouts are horrid as if it's the people who love them that are in the wrong?

Perhaps because people who don't have part of their sense of taste missing tend to have had sprouts forced on them in childhood by someone who does, and are rightly disgruntled about the whole thing.

Or because SCIENCE says the nasty bitter taste is there, it's just some people can't detect it.  That's the closest we're going to get to objective truth on the matter.

As a genetic lack of a receptor, I see it as equivalent to colourblindness:  I don't go around accusing people of being *wrong* for going on about things being purple rather than blue, or arbitrary differences in the shades of $generic_poo_colour, so it's only fair they accept my word for it when I talk about what sprouts really taste like.  Which doesn't preclude them loving the things, any more than being colourblind precludes me liking primary red because I think it's a nice understated dark colour.  We just have to accept that we're being weird.


It's one of those things like delayed sleep phase, which is a random biological thing that people can't help, but society - lead by the people who don't have the thing - has attached a negative value judgement to, as if people who can go to sleep early, or who can't taste the bitter of green veg, are somehow superior to the others.  I think it's only right that we make noise about how these things work, in the hope that more people become aware that they're innate things that can't be helped, and stop making people miserable trying to make them conform to someone else's biological convenience.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on January 24, 2017, 02:16:49 pm
I never boil cauliflower or broccoli. Sometimes I give it a quick twirl in the microwave to hurry it along, but I either break it up and saute, roast, or smother in cheesy goodness. It makes a quite good pilau, sauted with roughly ground spices and a good dose of turmeric, to go with curry as an alternative to rice.

I did, as a small child, eat a sprout that was mushy on the outside and frozen in the middle (i.e. cooked the traditional British way). Well, it got half way down before I ejected it with some force and it hit my mother smack in the middle of the forehead. I think that was traumatic for us both. It was quite a few years (about thirty) before I could eat them again.

On the wine front, I drink it from the box and I'm a classy kind of guy. If we have guests and I'm trying to make an impression, I'll even pour it into a glass first.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on January 24, 2017, 02:18:37 pm
Good heavens!
To lock or unlock the door on this little rented Fiat van i have to insert the key into the lock.
Then I have to turn it.

And
Because the key does not flip shut into the fob,  I have just stabbed myself in the scrotum when I sat down for a "coffee" in the services.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Pingu on January 24, 2017, 02:57:11 pm
I like risotto, but if I like it better if I put wine in the stock, but I don't really drink much these days so then I have leftover wine that goes off unless I make risotto every other night until it's all gone, so maybe I should try buying those tiny bottles of wine, or maybe a box, but that might be naff.

Make wine cubes.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Legs on January 24, 2017, 03:21:00 pm
It's one of those things like delayed sleep phase, which is a random biological thing that people can't help, but society - lead by the people who don't have the thing - has attached a negative value judgement to, as if people who can go to sleep early [, or who can't taste the bitter of green veg,] are somehow superior to the others.
While not disputing the existence of real DSPD, it is not hard to see that many young people's similar symptoms are brought about by equally unhealthy doses of fecklessness and Monster, poor sleep hygiene and a powerful peer-driven addiction to Call Of Duty.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Diver300 on January 24, 2017, 04:27:50 pm
Good heavens!
To lock or unlock the door on this little rented Fiat van i have to insert the key into the lock.
Then I have to turn it.
What is this "key" of which you talk. Is it related to the thing you have to have about your person for the doors to unlock for you that also works for starting the car?

Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Polar Bear on January 24, 2017, 04:38:32 pm
Good heavens!
To lock or unlock the door on this little rented Fiat van i have to insert the key into the lock.
Then I have to turn it.

And
Because the key does not flip shut into the fob,  I have just stabbed myself in the scrotum when I sat down for a "coffee" in the services.

My coffee has just hit the keyboard!    ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on January 24, 2017, 04:52:41 pm
It's one of those things like delayed sleep phase, which is a random biological thing that people can't help, but society - lead by the people who don't have the thing - has attached a negative value judgement to, as if people who can go to sleep early [, or who can't taste the bitter of green veg,] are somehow superior to the others.
While not disputing the existence of real DSPD, it is not hard to see that many young people's similar symptoms are brought about by equally unhealthy doses of fecklessness and Monster, poor sleep hygiene and a powerful peer-driven addiction to Call Of Duty.

CITATION NEEDED

I've ranted about this before.  Current thinking is that teenagers have delayed sleep phase for evolutionary reasons, perhaps to ensure that someone's awake in the paleolithic village to keep an eye out for predators, or so they can have lots of sex with each other or something.  Regardless of whether or not that reasoning is bollocks, it's clear that the effect is real, and that it has nothing to do with REM albums or computer games that have only existed for a couple of decades, and could be played at any time of day anyway.

But old people get to make the decisions, which means they're clearly morally superior and anyone whose brain works best from midday till 3am is feckless and needs to be belittled and deprived of sleep until they ...grow out of it, presumably?

#firstworldproblems
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Legs on January 24, 2017, 05:48:28 pm
It's one of those things like delayed sleep phase, which is a random biological thing that people can't help, but society - lead by the people who don't have the thing - has attached a negative value judgement to, as if people who can go to sleep early [, or who can't taste the bitter of green veg,] are somehow superior to the others.
While not disputing the existence of real DSPD, it is not hard to see that many young people's similar symptoms are brought about by equally unhealthy doses of fecklessness and Monster, poor sleep hygiene and a powerful peer-driven addiction to Call Of Duty.
Sorry, I should have added, "In my experience of working with young people in a Further Education establishment in a deprived area,", and I was referring to the vile caffeinated drink Monster rather than the REM album. I did get a good yank on that chain though, didn't I?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on January 24, 2017, 08:06:54 pm
Sprouts taste good because they are bitter, not because you can't taste the bitterness.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Dibdib on January 24, 2017, 08:21:08 pm
I did get a good yank on that chain though, didn't I?

Is this like when A&E doctors bang on self-righteously about h*lm*ts while being blissfully ignorant of the Actual Science on the topic?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ElyDave on January 24, 2017, 08:23:41 pm
How about mushy peas? Proper farting tackle . . .

Love sprouts, hate mushy peas.

Used to live half a mile from a sprout farm, picked them up for £5 a sack from the farm gate, took what we needed and sold the rest on at work, ended up making an unintended profit
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on January 24, 2017, 08:44:47 pm
Also, my bottle of lemon juice is too tall to fit into the fridge door bit, and my massive jar of artichokes is too tall for the fridge unless I move all the shelves up and down.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on January 24, 2017, 09:16:31 pm
Also, my bottle of lemon juice is too tall to fit into the fridge door bit, and my massive jar of artichokes is too tall for the fridge unless I move all the shelves up and down.

There's probably some mathematical theorem pertaining to fridge shelf height.  Whatever you set them at it seems to be wrong.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ian on January 24, 2017, 10:06:26 pm
I love mushy peas. The ones my gran would make by soaking marrowfat peas overnight and then boiling for a week until they were grey before resurrecting them with some benzene-based green colorant distilled from coal tar. They're glow like a uncovered nuclear pile in the dark.

One of my favorite memories is bonfire night, shovelling hot mushy peas with loads of mint sauce from a polystyrene cup into my mouth. Hot, ouchy, but so, so good. A variant of our student cowboy food was to replace the baked beans with mushy peas. That was good too. I may start a restaurant. Hoxton, prepare thyself.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: meddyg on January 29, 2017, 09:41:56 pm
Glad to see Radio 4 Saturday Live going with an item on 'how to use up left over Pannetone.'

I had been troubled - or would have been if we hadn't scoffed 4 Lidl shaped ones in their entirety

(reminds me of a charity recipe book asking ' what do you do with leftover red wine after a dinner party?'
Rising to the challenge, Glenys Kinnock replied ' Why would there be any left over the next day -don't be daft!')
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Zipperhead on February 04, 2017, 08:43:30 pm
There were queues to get into the V&A today. Queues I tell you. I had to go to the National Portrait Gallery to get a little culture.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: ElyDave on February 04, 2017, 08:52:21 pm
despite years of on and off searching, we can't find the right espresso cups.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Ruthie on February 04, 2017, 10:50:05 pm
There is no milk in the house for tomorrow morning's coffee. 
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on February 05, 2017, 02:29:18 pm
My carefully organised box of nuts, bolts and washers fell off the bench and broke. I have exited the garage until a replacement is procured and I am inspired to clear it up.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tigerrr on February 05, 2017, 07:12:52 pm
BOTH of the peelers are in the dishwasher.  There are potatoes, but no means of preparing them. Mrs Tiger has had to go out and buy another, otherwise we can't eat. 
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Feanor on February 05, 2017, 07:17:33 pm
BOTH of the peelers are in the dishwasher.  There are potatoes, but no means of preparing them. Mrs Tiger has had to go out and buy another, otherwise we can't eat.

Can't you simply interrupt the dishwasher by the technique of Opening The Door, and then after retrieving the desired item, close the door and re-start it?

I do this all the time.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Basil on February 05, 2017, 07:32:32 pm
I do this all the time too.  Well, not actually currently as we haven't fitted the dw yet, but Mrs B always  complains and say I will bugger the machine and I should switch it off first.   I have asked for citation,  but none is forthcoming.
Anyone else think it's harmful?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: PeteB99 on February 05, 2017, 07:34:55 pm
Peel them with a knife? Or are all the knives in the dishwasher as well?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Feanor on February 05, 2017, 07:39:29 pm
It won't bugger the machine.
The door is interlocked so that it switches off when you open it.

If you like, you can switch it off first, but it really does not matter.
On some machines, you just can't, because the on-it and off-it buttons are hidden on the upper part of the door, which are not accessible once the door is closed.
With these machines, there's no option but to open it whilst running.
They re-start once you close them again.

Really no problem.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on February 05, 2017, 07:40:27 pm
Eat the taters with the skins on? (Life is too short for peeling taters)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tigerrr on February 05, 2017, 08:01:18 pm
Peel them with a knife? Or are all the knives in the dishwasher as well?
We didn't lead the world trough the industrial revolution, beat jerry in WW2 and defeat the EU to peel our potatoes with knives like johnny foreigner in places like Spain.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on February 05, 2017, 09:03:15 pm
Eat the taters with the skins on? (Life is too short for peeling taters)

We never peel taters.
I peel carrots cos I dislike taste & texture of their skins.
Sweet potato skins drop off after being cooked in the microwave so get peeled on the plate.

It's not dedded me yet.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on February 05, 2017, 10:27:32 pm
Eat the taters with the skins on? (Life is too short for peeling taters)

We never peel taters.
These. But if I said that it wouldn't fit in a problem thread.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Diver300 on February 05, 2017, 10:44:18 pm
I do this all the time too.  Well, not actually currently as we haven't fitted the dw yet, but Mrs B always  complains and say I will bugger the machine and I should switch it off first.   I have asked for citation,  but none is forthcoming.
Anyone else think it's harmful?
No. It's probably an urban myth based on a misunderstanding or some 1950s technology that would get upset. See also:-
Needing a header tank on hot water systems
Making sure you use cross-over ethernet cables between computers
Not pushing on the glass when closing the door on a car with frameless windows
Not having more than 3 electrical appliances in one adaptor so it doesn't get overloaded
Having socket protectors for child safety
Not using full throttle on a car at low revs



Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on February 05, 2017, 10:51:12 pm
Hang on.  A 1950s dishwasher would have a fiendishly complicated mechanical time switch thinger to control its sequence of squirting, pumping, heating and whatever, which wouldn't be fazed by the door interlock cutting the power mid-sequence, and the main risk comes from the sudden steaming-up of your glasses.  But this is The Future, and if the 20th century has taught us anything it's "moar microcontrollers, moar better".  It seems entirely plausible that a modern dishwasher, equipped with regulation Ministry Of Crap Design internet-of-shit firmware, would reset to the beginning of the cycle after opening the door.  And then blab about the resulting carbon emissions to all your friends on TwitFace.

Best to play it safe and go to the chippy.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on February 05, 2017, 10:56:40 pm
What I don't understand is, why do dishwashers take so frikking long to do the dishes?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on February 05, 2017, 11:00:40 pm
Have you looked inside a dishwasher?  They're mostly just empty space and wire racks.  All the imps *and* their dishcloths have to fit in the space in the bottom, along with the salt mountain, the expensive bit that goes wrong, and the wire basket of soggy pasta.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Guy on February 06, 2017, 09:03:57 am
Hang on.  A 1950s dishwasher would have a fiendishly complicated mechanical time switch thinger to control its sequence of squirting, pumping, heating and whatever, which wouldn't be fazed by the door interlock cutting the power mid-sequence, and the main risk comes from the sudden steaming-up of your glasses.  But this is The Future, and if the 20th century has taught us anything it's "moar microcontrollers, moar better".  It seems entirely plausible that a modern dishwasher, equipped with regulation Ministry Of Crap Design internet-of-shit firmware, would reset to the beginning of the cycle after opening the door.  And then blab about the resulting carbon emissions to all your friends on TwitFace.

Best to play it safe and go to the chippy.

 :D POTD  :thumbsup:
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on February 06, 2017, 11:12:01 am
I do this all the time too.  Well, not actually currently as we haven't fitted the dw yet, but Mrs B always  complains and say I will bugger the machine and I should switch it off first.   I have asked for citation,  but none is forthcoming.
Anyone else think it's harmful?

RTFM
Quote from: Amica
Forgot to Add a Dish?
A forgotten dish can be added at any time before the detergent cup opens
1. Open the door a little to stop the washing
2. After the spray arms stop working you can open the door
3. Load the forgotten dishes.
4. Close the door, the dish washer will start running again after 10 seconds
It also refers the to DW 'mooing' if the door is left open!
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Tim Hall on February 06, 2017, 11:34:30 am
What I don't understand is, why do dishwashers take so frikking long to do the dishes?

I stayed at a lovely camping barn (tending towards the luxurious end of the scale) in Sedbergh last Easter. The dishwasher there took something daft, like two, yes two, count 'em, minutes. Or maybe five. Quick, really quick, whatever the number was.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Kim on February 06, 2017, 02:00:01 pm
It also refers the to DW 'mooing' if the door is left open!

Our fridge does that.  In the early days it made a noise like a rally car changing gear, but that settled down after a couple of months to a distinctive moo.  Now it's into its second decade, the moos have mostly been replaced by generic buzzing and gurgling noises.  As a homage, I've programmed our alerting system to play a loud 'moo' if the fridge temperature goes outside its normal range.

Hence "The freezer's mooing because the house is too cold. #FirstWorldProblems"
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on February 06, 2017, 04:12:16 pm
I do this all the time too.  Well, not actually currently as we haven't fitted the dw yet, but Mrs B always  complains and say I will bugger the machine and I should switch it off first.   I have asked for citation,  but none is forthcoming.
Anyone else think it's harmful?
No. It's probably an urban myth based on a misunderstanding or some 1950s technology that would get upset. See also:-
Needing a header tank on hot water systems
Making sure you use cross-over ethernet cables between computers
Not pushing on the glass when closing the door on a car with frameless windows
Not having more than 3 electrical appliances in one adaptor so it doesn't get overloaded
Having socket protectors for child safety
Not using full throttle on a car at low revs

The "not-pushing-on-the-glass" thing makes sense for any motorcar, though assuming one does not wear driving gloves, like a great ponce, purely to keep jammy smears off the windows.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Bledlow on February 06, 2017, 08:44:56 pm
(reminds me of a charity recipe book asking ' what do you do with leftover red wine after a dinner party?'
Rising to the challenge, Glenys Kinnock replied ' Why would there be any left over the next day -don't be daft!')
Leftover red wine? Does not compute.  ???
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on February 08, 2017, 06:58:05 pm
Hence "The freezer's mooing because the house is too cold. #FirstWorldProblems"
In Finland cold stores have to be heated in the winter.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mr Larrington on February 09, 2017, 03:05:04 am
There were occasions when I toiled in a warehouse belonging to Mr Sainsbury's House Of Toothy Comestibles when it was warmer in the cold store than in the main warehouse.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jakob W on February 09, 2017, 10:24:16 am
This morning the Radio 6 breakfast show had a nice example (explicitly stated as a first world problem): James May is selling his Rolls-Royce Corniche because he's developed an allergy to the leather seats.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: LEE on February 09, 2017, 10:30:14 am
My carefully organised box of nuts, bolts and washers fell off the bench and broke. I have exited the garage until a replacement is procured and I am inspired to clear it up.

I dropped my Bitsa box a while back.  I have interlocking rubber floor-mats in my workshop (it's very nice underfoot) which is basically a huge trampoline for M4 nuts and bolts.

I did exactly what you did, walked away.  I may have said, "Fuck".

I know I'll never see some of those bits again.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hatler on February 09, 2017, 11:01:05 am
My carefully organised box of nuts, bolts and washers fell off the bench and broke. I have exited the garage until a replacement is procured and I am inspired to clear it up.

I dropped my Bitsa box a while back.  I have interlocking rubber floor-mats in my workshop (it's very nice underfoot) which is basically a huge trampoline for M4 nuts and bolts.

I did exactly what you did, walked away.  I may have said, "Fuck".

I know I'll never see some of those bits again.
Completely OT, but what was the thinking behind the rubber mat ?
Is it expensive ?
Was it a pain to fit ?
What do you do about spillages ?
Do you clean it ?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Jaded on February 09, 2017, 11:07:14 am
Does it snag on the gimp suit?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Greenbank on February 09, 2017, 12:32:23 pm
What I don't understand is, why do dishwashers take so frikking long to do the dishes?

We only ever use our dishwasher on quick programme (30 minutes). Just have to give each item a quick rinse/light-scrub before it goes in. (If you put anything really dirty in there on the quick program it just spreads all of that mess around onto all of the other items and the hot water ensures it sticks nicely.)
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Mrs Pingu on February 09, 2017, 12:35:52 pm
What I don't understand is, why do dishwashers take so frikking long to do the dishes?

We only ever use our dishwasher on quick programme (30 minutes). Just have to give each item a quick rinse/light-scrub before it goes in. (If you put anything really dirty in there on the quick program it just spreads all of that mess around onto all of the other items and the hot water ensures it sticks nicely.)

At which point I have to say, what's the point in the dishwasher?
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Cudzoziemiec on February 09, 2017, 12:40:43 pm
Certainly doesn't take us 30 minutes to do the washing up! Oh, hang on, FWP: oh yeah, bank manager type person wants to  call me to "understand me on a personal level". WFT  ??? This is just a euphemism for selling me something like life insurance isn't it.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Vince on February 09, 2017, 12:49:48 pm
My carefully organised box of nuts, bolts and washers fell off the bench and broke. I have exited the garage until a replacement is procured and I am inspired to clear it up.

I dropped my Bitsa box a while back.  I have interlocking rubber floor-mats in my workshop (it's very nice underfoot) which is basically a huge trampoline for M4 nuts and bolts.

I did exactly what you did, walked away.  I may have said, "Fuck".

I know I'll never see some of those bits again.
I did clear most of it up, my inspiration being that I didn't want rusty nuts and bolts on the floor (The gully across the garage door once again failed to cope with a rain shower).
However that's as far it's got as I can't decide between another sorter box or a cabinet of individual draws as a replacement.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: hellymedic on February 09, 2017, 03:13:38 pm
This morning the Radio 6 breakfast show had a nice example (explicitly stated as a first world problem): James May is selling his Rolls-Royce Corniche because he's developed an allergy to the leather seats.

 ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: rafletcher on February 09, 2017, 03:19:16 pm
What I don't understand is, why do dishwashers take so frikking long to do the dishes?

We only ever use our dishwasher on quick programme (30 minutes). Just have to give each item a quick rinse/light-scrub before it goes in. (If you put anything really dirty in there on the quick program it just spreads all of that mess around onto all of the other items and the hot water ensures it sticks nicely.)

At which point I have to say, what's the point in the dishwasher?

Indeed - tho' our half size DW (so no pots and pans generally) does a good job on the 25 minute cycle without any prior cleaning.
Title: Re: First-World Problems.
Post by: Wowbagger on February 09, 2017, 03:53:15 pm
What I don't understand is, why do dishwashers take so frikking long to do the dishes?

We only ever use our dishwasher on quick programme (30 minutes). Just have to give each item a quick rinse/light-scrub before it goes in. (If you put anything really dirty in there on the quick program it just spreads all of that mess around onto all of the other items and the hot water ensures it sticks nicely.)