Yet Another Cycling Forum

General Category => The Knowledge => Health & Fitness => Topic started by: Wowbagger on August 11, 2014, 10:29:56 am

Title: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on August 11, 2014, 10:29:56 am
This morning I received my bowel cancer testing kit through the post.

It arrived too late for me to use it this morning.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on August 11, 2014, 11:55:10 am
It is worth doing, despite the yuk! factor.
Being a little younger, I was treated to a flexible sigmoidoscopy last year.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Basil on August 11, 2014, 11:56:31 am
I had my third one last week.  Judging from our comparitve ages, and guessing that this is your first, I think that they must come every two years.

They're not the best fun first thing in the morning, are they?
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: numbnuts on August 11, 2014, 12:40:23 pm
I'm just glad there is someone there to look at my shit
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Kim on August 11, 2014, 01:05:53 pm
I've looked at shit through a microscope.  It's a lot less exciting that you might expect.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on August 11, 2014, 09:50:35 pm
I have had a rather nice PM from a concerned forummer, whom I have assured that this is just a routine test that is sent to everyone who reaches 60.

I will probably give it a go in the morning. You will be relieved to hear that TT will remain WP.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Canardly on August 11, 2014, 10:02:27 pm
I knew about the telegram I didnt know about the Poo sticks.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on August 11, 2014, 10:21:39 pm
There is very little publicity about Bowel Screening because Nice People don't Talk About Poo. Nobody else makes poo after all, do they?
So the NHS sends discreet little envelopes to all eligible subjects, some of whom get Shocked or Worried.
We're English and DON'T Talk About Poo.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on August 11, 2014, 10:47:43 pm
I'm going to read the instructions again carefully before I go to bed. Mrs. Wow has also had a kit but hasn't done anything about it yet. We will probably have group therapy in the morning.

I don't mind talking about poo. It might be from my non-English side, or possibly because I was in Germany last week.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: caerau on August 11, 2014, 10:52:30 pm

We're English and DON'T Talk About Poo.


There seems to be plenty of it about on this forum these days.  I've not done a bowel cancer screen but I have had to provide a sample when I had food poisoning once.  Although a stool sample was a rather loose description at the time. Turned out to be campylobacter as I recall - that wasn't much fun either but a very effective way of losing 1 1/5 stone very quickly  ::-)
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on August 11, 2014, 10:54:13 pm
I'm sure this would be easier with a 'Continental Shelf' type German bog...
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on August 11, 2014, 10:59:05 pm
Blimey! I have to take two samples from each of three different craps. That's more onerous than I thought. I reckon that will be tomorrow, Thursday and Friday then.

I'm sure this would be easier with a 'Continental Shelf' type German bog...

The instructions state explicitly that you mustn't take the samples out of the bog because there is a risk that they could be contaminated with other people's shit. That would never do. The recommended method is to catch it in your hand, either in bog paper or a plastic bag, or in a clean ice cream tub*. Maybe the old-style German Krappenhaus might have been suitable, but certainly not the British WC.

*Do not put it back in the freezer.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Butterfly on August 11, 2014, 11:01:35 pm
Crumbs! That sounds complicated.

I talk about poo regularly, but I'm a nanny and we see a lot of it. ;D
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on August 11, 2014, 11:02:19 pm
Continental Shelf is self-cleansing and could be further decontaminated if needed.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: road-runner on August 12, 2014, 07:41:00 am
... this is just a routine test that is sent to everyone who reaches 60.

Aha, this is something to look forward to - and no, that wasn't said sarcastically. I lost a work colleague who, at the age of 54, died two weeks after stomach cancer was discovered and I hear or read of cancers being discovered in routine health checks. I have often wondered how one gets a routine health check as I haven't seen my GP in over 35 years.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on August 12, 2014, 08:39:51 am
One down, two to go.

That was physically - and psychologically - more difficult than I expected. My plan was to used our camping bog, temporarily lifting the "no solids" rule, but I firstly found that my enormous arse would not fit comfortably on its little seat in such a way that it would tidily collect everything that I might produce, simultaneously from both sources, as it were. Secondly, it is only a heavy duty plastic bucket and I had concerns that my elephantine mass might cause it to break.

Plan B. A double layer of paper handkerchief (man-size, naturally - much less flimsy, and of course a considerably greater area than a few sheets of bog roll) over your hand and wait for the first instalment. It's actually quite hard to steel yourself to catch your own turds, so conditioned are we from an early age not to do so. However, I collected a walnut-sized piece, used cardboard stick number one to smear a little in Window 1 of the test kit, disposed of the unwanted debris down the bog, waited for the second turd and repeated. Each test kit allows for three different craps and you have to take two samples from each, at different stages of the bowel motion, I suppose to check that different bits of the rectum are free from cancer cells.

The necessary deposits are now safely stored in my bedside cabinet, with the little flap tucked into its tab, waiting for the next two instalments. The cardboard sticks have been disposed of in a dog-shit bag to be exported to the park when we go later this morning.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Snakehips on August 12, 2014, 08:44:56 am
Presumably in-bowl contamination could come from contact with the bowl or the water. If one managed to suspend one's output above the waterline and away from the sides of the bowl , that material kept 'high and dry' would remain contamination free.
A sheet of loosely crumpled newspaper placed appropriately would do the trick. It would also flush away obligingly when the sampling was completed.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on August 12, 2014, 08:50:48 am
I think newspaper would be liable to cause a blockage downstream. The loose fibres of bog paper and paper handkerchieves are designed to disintegrate rapidly in water, but I think newspaper, especially the higher-quality stuff produced these days, would take much too long.
Title: Too much information!
Post by: frankly frankie on August 12, 2014, 09:06:44 am
Mine always sticks to the side of the bowl anyway** so it's simple to scrape off a sample that hasn't contacted any water or porcelain.  Hand-catching is impossible anyway - I can't reach.

** or in France, to the back wall.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on August 12, 2014, 09:38:37 am
How could you be sure that you are collecting samples from different turds?
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on August 12, 2014, 10:07:56 am
Maybe a pulp cardboard bedpan/bedpan liner, placed 'twixt WC pan and seat could catch the products efficiently.

Something like this http://www.amazon.co.uk/VERNACARE-BEDPAN-LINER-CASE-101AA100/dp/B00CESSBMK/ref=sr_1_7?ie=UTF8&qid=1407843785&sr=8-7&keywords=bedpan+liner (http://www.amazon.co.uk/VERNACARE-BEDPAN-LINER-CASE-101AA100/dp/B00CESSBMK/ref=sr_1_7?ie=UTF8&qid=1407843785&sr=8-7&keywords=bedpan+liner)

A keen forumenger could buy 100 use a few, then pass the pack on to the next in need.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on August 12, 2014, 10:15:42 am
Another 'line' of this bowel screening was to offer flexible sigmoidoscopy to everyone from some, but not all, General Practices in our area at 55.
I had this last year and needed a follow-up colonoscopy.
I have had the 'all-clear' after this and need nothing else till I get Wow's poo sticks in 4 years' time.
My friend, who is local and the same age, was not offered this.
Shame. Her first husband died of bowel cancer.
I suggested she request screening; she works in healthcare.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: orienteer on August 12, 2014, 10:26:06 am
Been doing these tests for a number of years now.  A cousin and her husband ignored them; unfortunately he died of bowel cancer earlier this year  :(
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Bledlow on August 12, 2014, 10:53:38 am
Squat over a sheet of clingfilm on the floor?
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Eccentrica Gallumbits on August 12, 2014, 12:32:25 pm
Or a glass table?
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Polar Bear on August 12, 2014, 12:36:13 pm
I'm reliably told that kitchen roll or paper towels are the best being generally thicker and larger per sheet than bog roll making it easier to catch a log cleanly.

Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on August 12, 2014, 12:48:18 pm
... this is just a routine test that is sent to everyone who reaches 60.

Aha, this is something to look forward to - and no, that wasn't said sarcastically. I lost a work colleague who, at the age of 54, died two weeks after stomach cancer was discovered and I hear or read of cancers being discovered in routine health checks. I have often wondered how one gets a routine health check as I haven't seen my GP in over 35 years.

So long as you are still registered with a UK GP at a UK address, it should be sent automagically.
Given you have been 'off scene' for a while, it might be wise to check you are still registered.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Jaded on August 12, 2014, 12:53:04 pm
The description makes riding the black lizard seem a doddle by comparison.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: red marley on August 12, 2014, 01:35:04 pm
Maybe a pulp cardboard bedpan/bedpan liner, placed 'twixt WC pan and seat could catch the products efficiently.

Something like this http://www.amazon.co.uk/VERNACARE-BEDPAN-LINER-CASE-101AA100/dp/B00CESSBMK/ref=sr_1_7?ie=UTF8&qid=1407843785&sr=8-7&keywords=bedpan+liner (http://www.amazon.co.uk/VERNACARE-BEDPAN-LINER-CASE-101AA100/dp/B00CESSBMK/ref=sr_1_7?ie=UTF8&qid=1407843785&sr=8-7&keywords=bedpan+liner)

A keen forumenger could buy 100 use a few, then pass the pack on to the next in need.

Roger - could you organise some YACF branded ones with various colour options?
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on August 12, 2014, 03:05:07 pm
Another 'line' of this bowel screening was to offer flexible sigmoidoscopy to everyone from some, but not all, General Practices in our area at 55.
I had this last year and needed a follow-up colonoscopy.
I have had the 'all-clear' after this and need nothing else till I get Wow's poo sticks in 4 years' time.
My friend, who is local and the same age, was not offered this.
Shame. Her first husband died of bowel cancer.
I suggested she request screening; she works in healthcare.

Would you like me to store them for 4 years or send them now?
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on August 12, 2014, 03:35:38 pm
Another 'line' of this bowel screening was to offer flexible sigmoidoscopy to everyone from some, but not all, General Practices in our area at 55.
I had this last year and needed a follow-up colonoscopy.
I have had the 'all-clear' after this and need nothing else till I get Wow's poo sticks in 4 years' time.
My friend, who is local and the same age, was not offered this.
Shame. Her first husband died of bowel cancer.
I suggested she request screening; she works in healthcare.

Would you like me to store them for 4 years or send them now?

I leave the decision to an older, wiser man... ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on August 12, 2014, 03:56:48 pm
Another 'line' of this bowel screening was to offer flexible sigmoidoscopy to everyone from some, but not all, General Practices in our area at 55.
I had this last year and needed a follow-up colonoscopy.
I have had the 'all-clear' after this and need nothing else till I get Wow's poo sticks in 4 years' time.
My friend, who is local and the same age, was not offered this.
Shame. Her first husband died of bowel cancer.
I suggested she request screening; she works in healthcare.

Would you like me to store them for 4 years or send them now?

I leave the decision to an older, wiser man... ;D ;D ;D

Who's that then?  ???
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Basil on August 13, 2014, 08:39:57 pm
I finally got my response letter today. I have to admit that I was beginning to get a little concerned (as you do).  Normally, the response is pretty quick, so waiting nearly two weeks had me thinking things like, "Oh god, they've found something, I've been passed to another department and I'll be getting a letter from them"
I opened the letter tonight.  My first thought was, "Oh no, it's too long, a whole page of stuff.  That's got to be bad news"

Basically it said, "Dear Basil, thank you for some most delightful poo.  All clear".
Then several paragraphs of blah, blah, blah.

 :thumbsup:
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on August 14, 2014, 12:59:08 am
Excellent news, Basil. I am sure your poo is a joy to behold.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on August 14, 2014, 09:43:54 am
I have finished my smearing and the little bit of card is in its PBP (Poo By Post) envelope and is ready to go. I'm rather glad to get that over with, to be honest.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on August 14, 2014, 10:38:53 am
The emotion of a motion in motion...
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on August 14, 2014, 12:04:14 pm
I was discussing this procedure with family members. My brother tells me that his dear wife cannot steel herself to play with her own turds and so has not partaken in the screening. I emailed my younger daughter, who knows a lot about cancer as it's her job to do so, and she quite sensibly pointed out that getting bowel cancer would involve a lot more horrid yuk than just catching a few turds ever couple of years, would no doubt hurt a lot and could well prove fatal, so nipping it in the bud must be a good idea.

So, folks, Take Care of your Turds!
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on August 14, 2014, 01:23:54 pm
If you are offered a flexible sigmoidoscopy at 55, go for that too.
The preparatory enema is 'just one of those things'  and not painful.
The scoping itself is a tad painful in parts but bearable.
They found and removed a polyp in my case, then referred me for a colonoscopy.
Colonoscopy preparation is tedious; 4 days on a low-res diet was dull and I really missed my 5-a-day (usually more like 8 in my case).
I had the colonoscopy using Entonox as I really didn't want sedation. Some parts were momentarily hurty.
I was given the all clear; they even saw my appendix!

A while later, a taxi driver told me how he had lost his 17-year-old son to bowel cancer.

Caught early, bowel growths are easily treatable.
Caught too late its poo bags
or curtains.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on August 14, 2014, 01:53:55 pm
I can't do that without a tardis!

Had a conversation with younger daughter today - she works for Cancer Research UK. She was telling me that bowel cancer is the third biggest killer in the UK, after breast and lung. From what I understand the polyps take about 50* years to develop and if you have the flexible sigmoidoscopy at 55 any they find will be removed and you won't need it done again. CRUK are currently pressurising the government to introduce these tests a a matter of course, to be followed up with the sort of test that I have done this week. It is estimated that incidences of bowel cancer will be reduced by 50% if FS becomes universal.

*I think this may be wrong and a result of me mishearing her - she was speaking to me from Melbourne. I think 15 is more likely.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on August 14, 2014, 01:58:24 pm
I wasn't suggesting a time machine for you, Wow!
I was trying to encourage our younger brethren to accept and participate in any screening offered for all the reasons you outline.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Jaded on August 14, 2014, 02:01:46 pm
The frequency depends on your pathology. I get to ride the black lizard every two years, on account of my condition.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: frankly frankie on August 14, 2014, 02:22:50 pm
I have finished my smearing and the little bit of card is in its PBP (Poo By Post) envelope and is ready to go.

Make sure you address it to Helly.  And put a 2nd-class stamp on, that way it really might take 4 years to get to her.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: arry_b on August 14, 2014, 03:27:41 pm
When the pilot for the Bowel Cancer Screening system was being run it wasn't unheard of for the labs, instead of a sealed sample card, to receive a jiffy bag containing a complete poo.

That made for an unhappy postman.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: MikeFromLFE on August 14, 2014, 04:25:03 pm
I've looked at shit through a microscope.  It's a lot less exciting that you might expect.

Having looked at a shit load of it in my career - on bits of cardboard, in plastic bottles, in blenders, dried under IR lamps, and stirred up with ether - its actually incredibly boring.
Although if you do want some light reading I refer you to The Bristol Stool Scale (yes, Bristol) :  http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bristol_stool_scale
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on August 14, 2014, 09:42:38 pm
I'm sure the Bristol Chart has been discussed elsewhere within yacf.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on August 14, 2014, 11:08:47 pm
It has indeed, more frequently that the King's Lynn Gonad Shield.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on August 24, 2014, 11:45:00 pm
I have received a letter to tell me that my turds are normal and that should be it for a couple of years.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Viking on September 02, 2014, 04:11:50 pm
Good Ho! Wowwers.  I have been doing this for a few years now and it is not pleasant.  I never dismiss it since my sister had bowel cancer several years ago, and I am happy to say, is still with us. However, spare a thought for the poor old postie.  He must know what he is collecting from the post box. 
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Basil on June 06, 2016, 04:39:32 pm
Mrs. B received her first ever poo sticks envelope last week.  I notice that it is still sitting on the sideboard.   I hope I'm not going to have to encourage her.  Particularly in view of today being the day my brother starts his chemo.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Ripio on June 06, 2016, 08:47:59 pm
I have had a rather nice PM from a concerned forummer, whom I have assured that this is just a routine test that is sent to everyone who reaches 60.

I will probably give it a go in the morning. You will be relieved to hear that TT will remain WP.
These screening tests start at age 50 in Scotland
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on September 07, 2016, 08:35:32 am
Mrs. Wow and I are going through our second instalment of Poo Sticks. Jan has finished hers and it's ready to post. I have just dealt with my second round (they want 6 smears all together, two from the different stages, as it were, of 3 different poos). Eating those quinoa seeds last night was definitely a mistake...
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Basil on September 07, 2016, 10:29:26 am
I've just received my next installment.  It doesn't seem long enough from the last time.  Perhaps it's because I've changed health authorities.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on September 07, 2016, 08:39:27 pm
It's more than 2 years, Basil.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Basil on September 07, 2016, 09:44:23 pm
Oh.  Thanks Wow.

Bugger.  I'm getting older faster.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Jaded on September 07, 2016, 10:59:47 pm
Riding the black lizard has to be more fun than poking turds with a plastic spatula.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on September 07, 2016, 11:04:21 pm
They aren't plastic. They are made of cardboard.

(https://scontent-lhr3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t35.0-12/14284842_1672091269776742_1049462037_o.jpg?oh=8169e62326861cb1f824853711161a00&oe=57D3140B)
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Jaded on September 07, 2016, 11:07:12 pm
Ah. You have to be quick, else your fingers go in it.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on September 08, 2016, 12:01:53 am
I wondered what those smears were on my Ipad.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on May 26, 2018, 02:38:48 pm
Just been sent a letter telling me I'll have a birthday card soon.
Hope I can manage handling the business.
Can't ask David...
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on July 25, 2018, 09:40:03 pm
Got the birthday card before my birthday.
Waited to return it till last Wednesday.
Letter in today's post telling me I'm OK, with usual caveats.

David read letter over my shoulder. Said he didn't know I'd had any recent screening.
Best that way.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: LEE on July 26, 2018, 12:58:41 pm
Since I reached 50 never a year goes by without such an activity and/or having something inserted in me.

My recent Over-50s NHS Bowel-Screening even beat my Prostate exams on the scale of - 1 to "Errr..Doctor...I think that's far enough".*

In case you were wondering it's a fiber-optic camera, equipped with a grabber and CO2 inflation nozzles. 
They inflate you with CO2 as they go along and it is fairly unpleasant because it actually does feel like you may explode.

None of this embarrassment or discomfort would, I am certain, be anywhere near as bad as the long-term effects, and treatment of, undiscovered cancer up the Poo-pipe. 

It's a very small price to pay to either get the all-clear or discover it early in my opinion.


* 'I'm sure he was wearing a wrist watch before he started'
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: andrewc on July 26, 2018, 01:20:17 pm
What's the starting age for this stuff ?   I'm 53 & haven't had any notifications.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Ham on July 26, 2018, 01:48:01 pm
I thought it started at 60, I may be wrong but mine did
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: ScumOfTheRoad on July 26, 2018, 01:49:23 pm
Lee, you have read Agent Picolax?
For the uninitated, this is from a cycling forum  http://www.ign.com/boards/threads/this-is-a-very-long-read-but-i-swear-it-is-worth-it-it-is-the-greatest-violent-poo-story-ever-told.452628177/

Be prepared - do not read this somewhere you cannot laugh till you go blue.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Basil on July 26, 2018, 01:57:53 pm
What's the starting age for this stuff ?   I'm 53 & haven't had any notifications.
My first one was at 60.  Then every 2 years since then.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on July 26, 2018, 02:26:52 pm
I had a sigmoidoscopy at 55 (followed by colonoscopy cos they found a polyp).

Poo sticks cards come at 60 hereabouts. I think they're every other year after that, up to 75.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Kim on July 26, 2018, 02:30:50 pm
You can guarantee they'll have stopped doing them by the time my generation get to 60...
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: LEE on July 26, 2018, 02:59:48 pm
What's the starting age for this stuff ?   I'm 53 & haven't had any notifications.

56 for the CO2 inflation and the "Selfie Stick" from hell.  NHS

The rest were as part of BUPA health-screening (A company perk of having someone's index-finger* shoved up your arse every few years).

* ...and what also feels like their hand and elbow.  It convinced me that I wouldn't be suited to prison life.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Chris S on July 26, 2018, 03:10:23 pm
Same as Helly - 55 for the Sigmoidoscopy.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: rafletcher on July 26, 2018, 05:33:46 pm
At 61 all I’ve had is one round of poo sticks.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on July 26, 2018, 05:53:29 pm
Not everyone gets scoped at 55. AIUI it's a postcode/GP surgery lottery.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on July 29, 2018, 09:39:31 pm
I am now 64 so I reckon I am due a third attempt.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on September 17, 2018, 02:23:21 pm
And it has arrived!
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Basil on September 24, 2018, 09:50:59 am
And it has arrived!

And so has mine this morning.  So other than a blip a few years ago on my change from NHS England to GIG Cymru, they're still appearing every two years.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on September 24, 2018, 03:31:33 pm
I completed my hat-trick last week, and my faeces should now be housed in Nottingham University.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on September 24, 2018, 03:49:23 pm
I completed my hat-trick last week, and my faeces should now be housed in Nottingham University.

I was pleasantly surprised with the speed of my (negative) results from St Mark's (Harrow).

Hope you get a similar pleasant surprise soon!
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Basil on September 27, 2018, 06:19:30 pm
I must remember to finish my poo sticks tomorrow.  I did Monday and Tuesday, but then had a tooth extracted Tuesday afternoon which meant I was spitting blood untill Wednesday morning.  (I'm a bleeder.  Blood thinners because AF)
I figured that if I'd ingested that much blood, it might show up as a false positive.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Valiant on September 29, 2018, 01:43:06 am
I just received a sexual health kit via SHL, there's a swab for everything including stool. Never had that done before.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on September 29, 2018, 08:21:46 pm
I completed my hat-trick last week, and my faeces should now be housed in Nottingham University.

I was pleasantly surprised with the speed of my (negative) results from St Mark's (Harrow).

Hope you get a similar pleasant surprise soon!

I had the all-clear today. Interestingly, the letter was addressed from Nottingham but the envelope said St. Marks, Harrow. Could it be that my poo is so pristine that different NHS branches want to share it?
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on September 29, 2018, 09:31:19 pm
That's VERY quick! Mebbe everything goes to Harrow but is relayed from a local hub.

But I am local to Harrow anyway.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: MikeFromLFE on September 29, 2018, 11:22:18 pm
I left pathology as this scheme was being rolled out, but the grand plan was to automate the process of testing in regional centres, with virtually no input from local NHS labs. Local labs were to continue to do the ad hoc testing, but not be part of the screening programme. As I left there was a bidding war in progress for funding for the clever machines that do this stuff.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on September 30, 2018, 08:44:54 am
And there was I imagining serried ranks of white-coated lab technicians whose solemn task it was to examine people's poo under a microscope and to say "Yea!" or "Nay!" depending on the blood cell count, and have little competitions to see who could get the most positives before tea break.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Basil on October 04, 2018, 10:11:18 am
Reply this morning.

Dear Mr Basil,
Top pooing!

No problems.

Love
A machine.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Grimrod on November 19, 2018, 11:49:26 pm
I've done a couple of these screenings now.  I was asked to re-submit the last one. Happily the re-test came back negative. When I reflected on what I'd been eating at the time I remembered enjoying a very rare steak a couple of days prior to sampling, so I reckon that's where the blood cells came from.
By the way, I reckon the NHS is one of the best things we've got going for us in the UK....
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Basil on November 20, 2018, 12:00:26 am
I left pathology as this scheme was being rolled out, but the grand plan was to automate the process of testing in regional centres, with virtually no input from local NHS labs. Local labs were to continue to do the ad hoc testing, but not be part of the screening programme. As I left there was a bidding war in progress for funding for the clever machines that do this stuff.

Was the contract won by Crapita?
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on November 27, 2018, 04:54:06 pm
Seems poo sticks only improve outcomes for men with left-sided tumours according to recent Finnish study...
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Salvatore on December 14, 2018, 03:13:13 pm
The first set of sample I sent were unclear, so I was sent a second kit. I submitted that, and it was negative, but it isn't the end of it. Best of three, apparently. 
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: hellymedic on December 14, 2018, 05:26:58 pm
The first set of sample I sent were unclear, so I was sent a second kit. I submitted that, and it was negative, but it isn't the end of it. Best of three, apparently.

Good luck.

I think I would opt for a colonoscopy at this point, personally. You might well end up with one anyway and it would mean less mucking about and greater diagnostic accuracy.

They're not too awful really.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Salvatore on December 14, 2018, 08:00:58 pm
The first set of sample I sent were unclear, so I was sent a second kit. I submitted that, and it was negative, but it isn't the end of it. Best of three, apparently.

Good luck.

I think I would opt for a colonoscopy at this point, personally. You might well end up with one anyway and it would mean less mucking about and greater diagnostic accuracy.

They're not too awful really.

After the tests I had when I was peeing burgundy rather than weak lemonade, a colonoscopy would hold no fears for me.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: tiermat on December 15, 2018, 07:51:36 am
For slightly different reasons, I need to do one of these, on a regular basis, usually after visiting the specialist.

The most recent one was sent in about a month ago. Results letter came yesterday, all clear, thus specialist doesn't need to see me for a year (was on 3-6 months)

Yay!
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: rogerzilla on December 15, 2018, 09:44:02 am
The easiest way to get poo on a stick is to eat something that makes it come out like a flock of seagulls, then you can scrape it off the side of the bowl  :hand:
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: rogerzilla on December 15, 2018, 09:44:36 am
After the tests I had when I was peeing burgundy rather than weak lemonade, a colonoscopy would hold no fears for me.
Beeturia?
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: whosatthewheel on December 15, 2018, 10:14:25 am
The easiest way to get poo on a stick is to eat something that makes it come out like a flock of seagulls, then you can scrape it off the side of the bowl  :hand:

That'd be sprouts for me then...  ::-)
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Salvatore on December 15, 2018, 10:25:23 am
After the tests I had when I was peeing burgundy rather than weak lemonade, a colonoscopy would hold no fears for me.
Beeturia?

Definitely blood,
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Wowbagger on May 30, 2019, 07:50:14 pm
Just had a communication from my pal Ruth NOTP, but Lancashire. Her husband had two positive tests for blood in his poo and, full of concern, had a colonoscopy. This gave him the all clear.

Medical advice: don't have black pudding in the 48 hours before using your poo sticks.  :D
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: Canardly on May 30, 2019, 08:04:24 pm
Where do piles sit in all of this?
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: caerau on May 30, 2019, 08:43:42 pm
Different colour blood - blood from them is fresh and bright red - the Nasty blood is much darker and thicker - but yeah- it does muddy the picture somewhat.
Title: Re: Poo sticks
Post by: nicknack on May 30, 2019, 10:34:32 pm
Don't have piles either. Last lot 2 years ago resulted in a colonoscopy.

2 down, 1 to go of my latest batch of sticks (this is my 4th lot now). I haven't had any obvious bleeding for a while now, so I'm keeping my fingers crossed.