Author Topic: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists  (Read 219412 times)

Mr Larrington

  • A bit ov a lyv wyr by slof standirds
  • Custard Wallah
    • Mr Larrington's Automatic Diary
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #850 on: April 20, 2015, 10:54:24 am »
Stock answer: on the end of my dick.

This doesn't work very well if you are a Lady, obv.
External Transparent Wall Inspection Operative & Mayor of Mortagne-au-Perche
Satisfying the Bloodlust of the Masses in Peacetime

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #851 on: April 20, 2015, 11:14:46 am »
Yesterday, and last week on Sunday rides "Where's your helmet?"
 I've never had that before, is there something going on?
I had two separate groups of children shouting that at me when I came down off Oxenhope Moor straight after the TdF last year. Never had it before or since (except from a couple of knob-end drivers of course).
Rust never sleeps

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #852 on: April 21, 2015, 09:28:23 pm »
"Mint bike, that!"

I was on the Surly 1x1. Can't really argue ;D

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #853 on: April 21, 2015, 10:03:19 pm »
"Mint bike, that!"

I was on the Surly 1x1. Can't really argue ;D

I got a 'Nyoooowwwwww' tonight.

 :thumbsup:

gibbo

  • Riding for fun, cake and beer.
    • Boxford Bike Club
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #854 on: April 24, 2015, 05:17:48 pm »
I actually had the "oi mate, you're wheel's going round!" just as we were leaving the pub last weekend. I so wanted to reply something along the lines of "so's your mother" but he looked a bit pissed so I just smiled at him as he laughed at his own joke.

mattc

  • n.b. have grown beard since photo taken
    • Didcot Audaxes
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #855 on: April 25, 2015, 09:01:29 am »
Yesterday, and last week on Sunday rides "Where's your helmet?"
 I've never had that before, is there something going on?
I had two separate groups of children shouting that at me when I came down off Oxenhope Moor

Did you use Mr Larrington's reply?!?
Has never ridden RAAM
---------
No.11  Because of the great host of those who dislike the least appearance of "swank " when they travel the roads and lanes. - From Kuklos' 39 Articles

tiermat

  • According to Jane, I'm a Unisex SpaceAdmin
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #856 on: April 25, 2015, 09:42:07 am »
On Thursday night, I got "get her 'at on" from a Lycra lout on a baked soot bike. I took this as meaning magic 'at.

He was just wearing a cotton cap on his head.

As was I.

I was confused.
I feel like Captain Kirk, on a brand new planet every day, a little like King Kong on top of the Empire State

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #857 on: April 25, 2015, 01:28:42 pm »
Yesterday, and last week on Sunday rides "Where's your helmet?"
 I've never had that before, is there something going on?
I had two separate groups of children shouting that at me when I came down off Oxenhope Moor

Did you use Mr Larrington's reply?!?
:-)

If only ...
Rust never sleeps

Riggers

  • Mine's a pipe, er… pint!
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #858 on: April 27, 2015, 09:24:55 am »
This oik was a bloke-on-a-bike. I won't give him the title of cyclist, because he doesn't deserve that honour.

Having stopped near Berwick yesterday morning, on a drizzly minor road, to specifically photograph some terrible potholes I knew would 'still be there' (bless East Sussex CC), I thought I'd photograph little Bradley in one of them (Instagram: @mr.rigs if anyone's interested), and noticed this chap approaching me. I'd just got my phone out and as he cycled past I said "Morning" to him, and his reply was: "Put your fucking phone away!"

I replied: "I'm photographing potholes!" And as I was so incensed by his outrageous and wholly unwarranted outburst at me, concluded with: "You fucking knob head!" and "Nutter!" That seemed the most appropriate recourse (apart from chasing him on the bike that is). Seemed the best way to deal with him… like with like.

He cycled down the road, mumbling and ranting, interjected with a few effing and jeffings. You think to yourself: "Why, in all this world, does my life have to cross paths with some lunatic like this?"
Certainly never seen cycling south of Sussex

Vince

  • Can't climb; won't climb
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #859 on: April 27, 2015, 11:04:37 am »
Netwrok Rail employee at Liverpool Street on Friday: "Nice bike". :)
216km from Marsh Gibbon

arabella

  • no se porque yo no lo se
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #860 on: April 28, 2015, 10:40:03 pm »
car driver, to me, after mini rounabout
"why don't you indicate"
 ??? that would be because I was going straight on

I've come to the conclusion that the part of my commute I least enjoy is the occasional so&so who takes it upon themself to advise (ha ha) me to "use the cycle path".  Should I ever get the chance to reply I will thank them for their recommendation but decline on the basis they aren't doing so themself.
In the dark, all views are the same.

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #861 on: April 28, 2015, 10:50:51 pm »
Yesterday, and last week on Sunday rides "Where's your helmet?"

A woman in our village used to shout that at me.

I would assume it was a variation on the 'Nuns in the bath' joke and reply:

"Yes, it probably does."  :demon:
If it ain't broke, fix it 'til it is...

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #862 on: April 29, 2015, 09:24:38 am »
Yesterday, and last week on Sunday rides "Where's your helmet?"

A woman in our village used to shout that at me.

I would assume it was a variation on the 'Nuns in the bath' joke and reply:

"Yes, it probably does."  :demon:

 ;D Using that.

I got a rather vitriolic 'go get a helmet' from someone the other day, my response was somewhat less prosaic.

Kim

  • 2nd in the world
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #863 on: April 29, 2015, 12:49:57 pm »
My standard response (you have to have standard responses, in order to appear actually witty, rather than only with hindsight) to "get a helmet" is "get a bicycle".  In the rare event that it's actually coming from a cyclist, there's usually some other unwarranted safety advice that can be substituted.
To ride the Windcheetah, first, you must embrace the cantilever...

clarion

  • Tyke
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #864 on: April 29, 2015, 04:39:12 pm »
I am reminded we got shouted at by an oik who was a berk on a bike - a courier, in fact, who should have known better.

Aaaaanyway, we were riding up Buckingham Palace Road, approaching the divergence of the Bus (only) Lane, and the western side of Grosvenor Gardens.  We were in the right hand lane, as we were going to dismount at the Bus Lane.  A van came speeding up behind us, and beeped at us impatiently.  The berk started shouting at us to get into the left hand lane, and we told him that was wrong.  He got quite aeriated about it.  The van driver shouted at us, emboldened by the berk's exhortations, saying even a cyclist knew we should get out of the way.

Gee. 

Thanks.
Getting there...

Basil

  • Um....err......oh bugger!
  • Help me!
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #865 on: April 29, 2015, 05:23:43 pm »
Yesterday, and last week on Sunday rides "Where's your helmet?"

A woman in our village used to shout that at me.

I would assume it was a variation on the 'Nuns in the bath' joke and reply:

"Yes, it probably does."  :demon:

 ;D Using that.

I got a rather vitriolic 'go get a helmet' from someone the other day, my response was somewhat less prosaic.

I have been know to respond with, coupled with a look of worried surprise,  ???  :o
"What?  You want to see my purple shiny helmet?"

Akchurly, the last and only time I owned a cycle helmet, it was purple and of course shiny.  :demon:
Quote from: Kim
And remember that friends who organise things on Facebook aren't proper friends anyway.

Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #866 on: May 17, 2015, 10:30:25 pm »
Man outside pub as Mrs.M cycles past-"Oi, Paula Radcliffe"

caerau

  • SR x 3 - PBP fail but 1090 km - hey - not too bad
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #867 on: May 18, 2015, 05:14:02 pm »
Ooh, forgot about this thread, I got a corker on the Old Roads 300 a couple of weeks back.


Cycling through a small village towards Cheddar there was a playground with some tallish trees covering a hidden young lady presumably on a climbing frame as I heard a voice from well above me shout…


'The more you pedal, the wetter I get!"
 :jurek:


I moved on without comment - as I didn't give her the attention she wanted (ahem) it sadly transmogrified into…


"WHAARUGGGARRRHHH!'


But the originality of the first comment will stay with me for a while although I expect it wasn't really true ;)
It's a reverse Elvis thing.

tonycollinet

  • No Longer a western province of Númenor
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #868 on: May 18, 2015, 10:32:17 pm »
Are you sure you weren't just cycling through a deep puddle?  :D

Kim

  • 2nd in the world
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #869 on: June 04, 2015, 05:42:09 pm »
"Spastic!"

"Wuourggahorgh darlin'!"

"Get off the fucking road!"

"Get a car, you cunt!"


News just in:  The van drivers have their windows open.
To ride the Windcheetah, first, you must embrace the cantilever...

Basil

  • Um....err......oh bugger!
  • Help me!
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #870 on: June 04, 2015, 06:02:06 pm »
Not a great day then, Kim?   :(

The windows being open just get me more Seth Armstrong shouts.
Quote from: Kim
And remember that friends who organise things on Facebook aren't proper friends anyway.

caerau

  • SR x 3 - PBP fail but 1090 km - hey - not too bad
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #871 on: June 04, 2015, 06:04:32 pm »
Funny how the C word is almost a perfect description of those that like to use it a lot huh?
It's a reverse Elvis thing.

Kim

  • 2nd in the world
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #872 on: June 04, 2015, 06:05:16 pm »
Not a great day then, Kim?   :(

It's okay, they were outnumbered by positive shouts, thumbs-ups and so on from non-van-drivers.
To ride the Windcheetah, first, you must embrace the cantilever...

Pancho

  • لَا أَعْبُدُ مَا تَعْبُدُونَ
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #873 on: June 05, 2015, 01:37:06 pm »
"Spastic!"

That's rather retro.

Kim

  • 2nd in the world
Re: Oiks shouting stuff at cyclists
« Reply #874 on: June 05, 2015, 02:26:07 pm »
"Spastic!"

That's rather retro.

Fairly standard recumbent-specific abuse.  I'd rather that than "DLA!" (which I've only had the once, thankfully), which conveys a whole other level of nastiness.

(I'm assuming they're inferring that funny bike means a disabled rider who might not be aware that they have a disability, so would benefit from having it pointed out - rather than using 'spastic' as a generic term of abuse, which would indeed be retro.)

It goes both ways of course.  Sometimes people tell you you're cripspirational...
To ride the Windcheetah, first, you must embrace the cantilever...