Author Topic: SMIWOTS - a new phrase  (Read 1634 times)

SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« on: April 21, 2018, 08:19:45 am »
Given the continuing sagas where idiots rely on SatNavs and then blame the SatNav for their incompetent driving, I would like to introduce and claim a new phrase

SMIWOTS

Sorry Mate It Wasn't On The SatNav


hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« Reply #1 on: April 21, 2018, 01:16:31 pm »
Great idea!
Seems, in general the following don't feature in SatNavs:

Traffic lights
Width restrictions
Height restrictions
Speed humps

Pronunciation and numeric parsing can be somewhat challenging, eg Co-LINE-deep Lane for Colindeep Lane and A four fourteen O for A4140...

Kim

  • 2nd in the world
Re: SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« Reply #2 on: April 21, 2018, 08:09:41 pm »
I've been driving some silly Toyota thing with a built-in satnav that instructs you to "go around the roundabout, first exit".  I assume it's suggesting a kind of orbital slingshot manoeuvre, of the type traditionally used to escape the Watford ring road.
To ride the Windcheetah, first, you must embrace the cantilever...

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« Reply #3 on: April 21, 2018, 09:52:59 pm »
The roundabout just south of my abode was replaced with traffic lights around 2000.

Satnavs have only just stopped describing roundabout manoeuvres fot this location.

Re: SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« Reply #4 on: April 22, 2018, 02:51:39 am »
I've been driving some silly Toyota thing with a built-in satnav that instructs you to "go around the roundabout, first exit".  I assume it's suggesting a kind of orbital slingshot manoeuvre, of the type traditionally used to escape the Watford ring road.
The satnav in a Jeep I was in a few years ago didn't understand roundabouts, due to the language difficulties due to the translation from American to English. The instruction for a right turn at a four-exit roundabout was "Take the third left".

It also had a map that suggested some Cornish roads that were very narrow even by Cornwall standards, that would have been best avoided.
Quote from: Kim
Paging Diver300.  Diver300 to the GSM Trimphone, please...

Kim

  • 2nd in the world
Re: SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« Reply #5 on: April 22, 2018, 09:42:25 am »
I've been driving some silly Toyota thing with a built-in satnav that instructs you to "go around the roundabout, first exit".  I assume it's suggesting a kind of orbital slingshot manoeuvre, of the type traditionally used to escape the Watford ring road.
The satnav in a Jeep I was in a few years ago didn't understand roundabouts, due to the language difficulties due to the translation from American to English. The instruction for a right turn at a four-exit roundabout was "Take the third left".

I've used that sort of thing too:  "Bear right.  Bear Right.  Bear right.  Turn Left."

(Can't fault its bear-avoidance tactics.)
To ride the Windcheetah, first, you must embrace the cantilever...

Re: SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« Reply #6 on: April 22, 2018, 11:05:00 am »
 :)

Re: SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« Reply #7 on: April 22, 2018, 01:41:59 pm »
here: https://goo.gl/maps/n4gA8E3tqVK2 lorries always fail here. Hmm, where is the Eddie stobart depot... Satnav says right... sign says left... which to choose.... Right! WRONG!   ::-) :)
This is destiny, it's fate, it's the matrix working in my favour.

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« Reply #8 on: April 22, 2018, 02:32:23 pm »
[OT] Revert to map and zoom out one stop.

Some wag has renamed Selston High School 'Hogwarts'...

https://www.google.co.uk/maps/@53.0719162,-1.3070747,16z

Gattopardo

  • Lord of the sith
  • Overseaing the building of the death star
Re: SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« Reply #9 on: April 22, 2018, 04:56:15 pm »
Get in car, take out brain.... :thumbsup:

Re: SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« Reply #10 on: April 22, 2018, 06:59:01 pm »
"Third left" (or second left or whatever) has definitely been in use since decades before satnavs and I'm not entirely sure it's even American.
The earth is vast and beautiful and contains many miraculous places. (Chekhov)

Re: SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« Reply #11 on: April 23, 2018, 12:10:57 am »
Great idea!
Seems, in general the following don't feature in SatNavs:

Traffic lights
Width restrictions
Height restrictions
Speed humps

And other road users?
L'enfer, c'est les autos.

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« Reply #12 on: April 23, 2018, 12:04:53 pm »
Great idea!
Seems, in general the following don't feature in SatNavs:

Traffic lights
Width restrictions
Height restrictions
Speed humps

And other road users?

Well, they never featured.

SatNavs should account for static road features.

Height, weight and width restrictions are omitted on standard motorist units, with tragicomical results.

Re: SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« Reply #13 on: April 24, 2018, 01:13:30 pm »
Although it is a legal requirement for drivers of large vehicles (>7.5 tonne I believe) to know the proportions of their vehicle. Many have them on the inside of the sun visor or any other obvious place for handy reference. In the days when police officers actually left the police station they were known to stop lorries and one of the checks was to ask the driver to quote his/her er... dimensions.

Doesn't stop them blocking the road when they realise satnav has taken them down a certain route but there's usually a fairly obvious AVOIDING LOW BRIDGE SIGN that gets ignored there really is no excuse for actually striking a bridge or other object.
Duct tape is magic and should be worshipped

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« Reply #14 on: April 24, 2018, 02:19:14 pm »
Aren't dimensions ALWAYS posted in BIG letters just above the windscreen, with the weight stated somewhere on the lower nearside body? That's certainly the case on London buses!

I see they are.
Apparently the law requires vehicle height in feet and inches to be displayed in the cab of vehicles exceeding 3 metres in height. (Lovely unit mix!)
https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/28628/bridgestrikestransmanagers.pdf

Re: SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« Reply #15 on: April 24, 2018, 06:19:26 pm »
Although it is a legal requirement for drivers of large vehicles (>7.5 tonne I believe) to know the proportions of their vehicle. Many have them on the inside of the sun visor or any other obvious place for handy reference. In the days when police officers actually left the police station they were known to stop lorries and one of the checks was to ask the driver to quote his/her er... dimensions.

Doesn't stop them blocking the road when they realise satnav has taken them down a certain route but there's usually a fairly obvious AVOIDING LOW BRIDGE SIGN that gets ignored there really is no excuse for actually striking a bridge or other object.

The problem is that most SatNav data is derived from Ordnance Survey data which has some 30 classifications of roads, byways and rights of way. SatNavs cannot deal with this so group them together.

Hence it is possible to get a perfectly manageable road and a very narrow impassible road featuring the same way on a SatNav

Jacomus

  • My favourite gender neutral pronoun is comrade
Re: SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« Reply #16 on: May 04, 2018, 04:01:23 pm »
Aren't dimensions ALWAYS posted in BIG letters just above the windscreen, with the weight stated somewhere on the lower nearside body? That's certainly the case on London buses!

I see they are.
Apparently the law requires vehicle height in feet and inches to be displayed in the cab of vehicles exceeding 3 metres in height. (Lovely unit mix!)
https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/28628/bridgestrikestransmanagers.pdf

Weights are easy, because all restrictions are based on maximum permissible gross weight or axle weight.
"The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity." Amelia Earhart

Re: SMIWOTS - a new phrase
« Reply #17 on: May 09, 2018, 09:26:09 pm »
I've been driving some silly Toyota thing with a built-in satnav that instructs you to "go around the roundabout, first exit".  I assume it's suggesting a kind of orbital slingshot manoeuvre, of the type traditionally used to escape the Watford ring road.

One of the early software versions/maps I had on my Garmin 705 would tell me to turn left at any roundabout (even if I was going 3/4 the way around it). Presumably on principle that to leave the roundabout at any exit you had to make a left turn...