Author Topic: food lore  (Read 2572 times)

ian

  • fatuously disingenuous
    • The Suburban Survival Guide
Re: food lore
« Reply #25 on: January 16, 2019, 04:09:44 pm »
When I lived in west London, there used to be a kebab shop on the Askew Road that did fantastic kebabs, proper identifiable (without a DNA test) meat on skewers chargrilled to goodness. No idea if it's still there but it ought to be.
!nataS pihsroW

Re: food lore
« Reply #26 on: January 16, 2019, 04:25:43 pm »
The thing my kid sister remembers most about the freshers' induction at Oxford is how they tried to drum in to everyone multiple times not to eat from the kebab vans. I don't know whether this was patrician disdain for street food, or whether there actually had been a spate of student food poisonings attributed to them...

ian

  • fatuously disingenuous
    • The Suburban Survival Guide
Re: food lore
« Reply #27 on: January 16, 2019, 04:38:35 pm »
Given that the average high street donner kebab exists primarily to flout every established convention of food hygiene, it's hard to believe that serving them from a kebab van could be worse.
!nataS pihsroW

ian

  • fatuously disingenuous
    • The Suburban Survival Guide
Re: food lore
« Reply #28 on: January 16, 2019, 06:20:49 pm »
Were we the only kids to snort space dust like it was some kind of kiddy crack? It has similar effects and would fill your head with the most awesome crackling like your brain was on fire. It sent David Derbyshire so mad that he ran at full pelt into a brick wall and knocked out all his teeth. After which it was banned. Grange Hill had heroin, we had space dust.
!nataS pihsroW

citoyen

  • Cat 6 Racer
Re: food lore
« Reply #29 on: January 16, 2019, 07:02:54 pm »
I had an inordinate fondness for Heinz tinned spag bol as a young’un. Haven’t had it for years and suspect I would find it revolting now. Do they still make it?

Also Heinz tinned ravioli, with a ‘meat’ filling that had the consistency of toothpaste.

However, even as a kid I found the viscous orange goo that coated the spaghetti hoops too sweet.

All made to the authentic recipes handed down to Giuseppe Heinz by his dear old mamma back in Tuscany, of course.

Re: food lore
« Reply #30 on: January 16, 2019, 07:25:30 pm »
Full English inna tin, anyone?




Still available from Iceland, apparently.

ETA - I've just Googled 'Heinz tinned salad'.
It has returned results for 'Heinz Vegetable Salad'.
Errr.... remind me of what other sort of salad there is.....

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: food lore
« Reply #31 on: January 16, 2019, 07:26:39 pm »
Given most kebabs end up involved in calls using the Large White Telephone, many food poisonings are probably avoided.
If you don't like your democracy, vote against it.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Solar powered, tea fuelled cycle-wol
Re: food lore
« Reply #32 on: January 16, 2019, 07:33:50 pm »
Alphabetti spaghetti. The only food that can make your dog talk.
The earth is vast and beautiful and contains many miraculous places. (Chekhov)

Torslanda

  • Professional Gobshite
  • Just a tart for retro kit . . .
    • John's Bikes
Re: food lore
« Reply #33 on: January 16, 2019, 07:35:24 pm »
Given most kebabs end up involved in calls using the Large White Telephone, many food poisonings are probably avoided.

I have eaten many a kebab. Doner, chicken, seekh & shami. Never visited the great white telephone as a result. I'm either extremely lucky or must have an iron constitution, cos I've had thousands...
VELOMANCER

Well that's the more blunt way of putting it but as usual he's dead right.

Re: food lore
« Reply #34 on: January 16, 2019, 07:37:42 pm »
Given most kebabs end up involved in calls using the Large White Telephone, many food poisonings are probably avoided.

I have eaten many a kebab. Doner, chicken, seekh & shami. Never visited the great white telephone as a result. I'm either extremely lucky or must have an iron constitution, cos I've had thousands...

Yebutt - You and Fuzzy go back a long time. No?
(See also the food rant thread)

Torslanda

  • Professional Gobshite
  • Just a tart for retro kit . . .
    • John's Bikes
Re: food lore
« Reply #35 on: January 16, 2019, 07:39:02 pm »
Alphabetti spaghetti. The only food that can make your dog talk.

Also the medium through which Trump issues decrees, allegedly.
VELOMANCER

Well that's the more blunt way of putting it but as usual he's dead right.

Torslanda

  • Professional Gobshite
  • Just a tart for retro kit . . .
    • John's Bikes
Re: food lore
« Reply #36 on: January 16, 2019, 07:40:50 pm »
Given most kebabs end up involved in calls using the Large White Telephone, many food poisonings are probably avoided.

I have eaten many a kebab. Doner, chicken, seekh & shami. Never visited the great white telephone as a result. I'm either extremely lucky or must have an iron constitution, cos I've had thousands...

Yebutt - You and Fuzzy go back a long time. No?

Yeah, I'm pretty old  ;D but I didn't actually meet Fuzzy in person until about 12 months ago...
VELOMANCER

Well that's the more blunt way of putting it but as usual he's dead right.

spesh

  • Mental floss tycoon
Re: food lore
« Reply #37 on: January 16, 2019, 07:42:53 pm »
Alphabetti spaghetti. The only food that can make your dog talk.

Also the medium through which Trump issues decrees, allegedly.

Actually it's more that you or I could eat a tin of alphabetti and then poop out a better argument than the Hamberdler.  :demon:
This is not The Greatest Sig Line in the World, no.
This is just a tribute.

ian

  • fatuously disingenuous
    • The Suburban Survival Guide
Re: food lore
« Reply #38 on: January 16, 2019, 07:46:13 pm »
You just made it clear to me that my claim never to have had pasta before I was 18 to be a big fat, tomato sauce smothered lie. I'd forgotten about Heinz spaghetti bolognese in a tin and yes, the ravioli with the peculiarly mushy filling like you were eating some small soggy animal's brains. Yet curiously more delicious than any small animal's brains.

My parents wouldn't eat it any of that pasta stuff, for obvious reasons. Their culinary circumspection, chary of anything but the most insipid of British food, more mummified than cooked, endless sad plates of overheated and burnt despair, used to drive me up the wall. My mother was sent home from Morrisons (where she worked) because someone dropped a jar of korma sauce and the smell made her sick (and thereafter she refused to work on the 'ethnic food' aisle). My father is still going on about the time he ate a piece a rocket – ten fucking years ago. My sister and niece aren't a lot better, they'll physically recoil if presented with an olive. It's not just that they scared to try something new (and they probably are), it's that they lack the curiosity. They're just not interested in anything that's not primarily potato or overcooked meat product. My mother doesn't even eat, she's survived the last forty plus years on a diet of drizzle and cigarettes. I did go a bit mental at our wedding where the inlaws had hired an actual Parisian bistro (I know this because it was in Paris) for a meal (at no small expense) and all my parents did was shuffle the food (excellent) around their plate and refuse to eat. Honestly, french fries are still fucking chips. The bloody irony, as a kid I had to eat everything or I got served it again later, even the unchewable liver that our mental poo-eating staffie wouldn't eat. Sorry, an escaped rant.

And breathe.

But yes, alphabet spaghetti. You ever think they somehow ration out the letters to limit the number of rude words you can spell out on your plate?
!nataS pihsroW

Re: food lore
« Reply #39 on: January 16, 2019, 08:15:38 pm »
If you hold a tin of alphabetti spaghetti to your ear you can sometimes hear the ‘C’.

Smash.

Re: food lore
« Reply #40 on: January 16, 2019, 08:22:46 pm »
If you hold a tin of alphabetti spaghetti to your ear you can sometimes hear the ‘C’.

Smash.
Very good.
I thought that only worked with pasta shells.


I think I have your coat over here.
(and mine, appears to be just next to it)
Our taxi appears to have been summoned.

Re: food lore
« Reply #41 on: January 16, 2019, 08:32:03 pm »
You just made it clear to me that my claim never to have had pasta before I was 18 to be a big fat, tomato sauce smothered lie. I'd forgotten about Heinz spaghetti bolognese in a tin and yes, the ravioli with the peculiarly mushy filling like you were eating some small soggy animal's brains. Yet curiously more delicious than any small animal's brains.

My parents wouldn't eat it any of that pasta stuff, for obvious reasons. Their culinary circumspection, chary of anything but the most insipid of British food, more mummified than cooked, endless sad plates of overheated and burnt despair, used to drive me up the wall. My mother was sent home from Morrisons (where she worked) because someone dropped a jar of korma sauce and the smell made her sick (and thereafter she refused to work on the 'ethnic food' aisle). My father is still going on about the time he ate a piece a rocket – ten fucking years ago. My sister and niece aren't a lot better, they'll physically recoil if presented with an olive. It's not just that they scared to try something new (and they probably are), it's that they lack the curiosity. They're just not interested in anything that's not primarily potato or overcooked meat product. My mother doesn't even eat, she's survived the last forty plus years on a diet of drizzle and cigarettes. I did go a bit mental at our wedding where the inlaws had hired an actual Parisian bistro (I know this because it was in Paris) for a meal (at no small expense) and all my parents did was shuffle the food (excellent) around their plate and refuse to eat. Honestly, french fries are still fucking chips. The bloody irony, as a kid I had to eat everything or I got served it again later, even the unchewable liver that our mental poo-eating staffie wouldn't eat. Sorry, an escaped rant.

And breathe.

But yes, alphabet spaghetti. You ever think they somehow ration out the letters to limit the number of rude words you can spell out on your plate?

My bold.
I've had to work with an invective filter on a scrolling display board on a number of occasions.
FWIW The filter isn't insurmountable....

Re: food lore
« Reply #42 on: January 16, 2019, 08:32:59 pm »
Swindon has a Jason Donervan in the Dorcan industrial estate.  Maybe there's also a Doner Summer somewhere.  There is also Magic Kebabs...on the Magic Roundabout.
Never tell me the odds.

Re: food lore
« Reply #43 on: January 16, 2019, 09:06:34 pm »
Ah, this thread has prompted memories of sandwich spread and crisp sandwiches. And the soggy pastry of tinned steak pies is food nirvana.
We are making a New World (Paul Nash, 1918)

Re: food lore
« Reply #44 on: January 16, 2019, 09:21:09 pm »
Have we had Cadbury's Smash yet?  With a packet of Smash, a Fray Bentos pie and a tin of garden peas, I had some decent fridge-free meals as a student.

Also...Heinz Invaders which, years after the initial video game craze* had worn off, were own-branded as the crappily-named Sainsbury's Space Shapes.

*someone needs to make GTA shapes of a hood blowing out some crackwhore's brains and a boosted Shelby Cobra.
Never tell me the odds.

Re: food lore
« Reply #45 on: January 16, 2019, 09:25:58 pm »
We had freeze dried peas that mum got from the cash and carry (Bookers in Tunbridge Wells) using her Meals in Wheels discount card.
We are making a New World (Paul Nash, 1918)

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: food lore
« Reply #46 on: January 16, 2019, 09:30:42 pm »
Ah, this thread has prompted memories of sandwich spread and crisp sandwiches. And the soggy pastry of tinned steak pies is food nirvana.

Heinz Sandwich Spread: salad cream with small vegetable pieces. I loved it but Mum hated it...

ian

  • fatuously disingenuous
    • The Suburban Survival Guide
Re: food lore
« Reply #47 on: January 16, 2019, 09:36:29 pm »
AKA 'sick on toast.'

Apropos instant mash, at the end of every Warner Brothers-produced TV show, I will loudly sing FOR MASH GET SMASH because I swear it's the same music, though my wife remains unconvinced.

Given the amount of instant mash I ate as a child, I'm still actually 3.4% dehydrated potato. If I fell in a big gravy boat I'd soak it all up.
!nataS pihsroW

Cudzoziemiec

  • Solar powered, tea fuelled cycle-wol
Re: food lore
« Reply #48 on: January 16, 2019, 09:55:26 pm »
Have we had Cadbury's Smash yet?  With a packet of Smash, a Fray Bentos pie and a tin of garden peas, I had some decent fridge-free meals as a student.
Are you talking about the Smash that was advertised with aliens saying "For mash get Smash"? You mean that instant mashed potato was made by the Dairy Milk people? ??!??!!?! How come it wasn't available in a Bournville version as well?!!?!!?!
The earth is vast and beautiful and contains many miraculous places. (Chekhov)

ian

  • fatuously disingenuous
    • The Suburban Survival Guide
Re: food lore
« Reply #49 on: January 16, 2019, 09:58:22 pm »
I think, and I may be wrong (which I am pretty much all the time, no need to remind me), it was originally made by Mars. Hence the entire Martian thing. And Mars is now Cadbury.
!nataS pihsroW