Author Topic: Random Airline Food Combinations  (Read 1466 times)

Random Airline Food Combinations
« on: June 02, 2019, 11:53:36 pm »
On a recent flight to Japan, the meal options were a vegetarian pasta, or "Japanese" fried chicken. Bother were reasonable appetising, as these things go, accompanied on the tray by the obligatory (for BA) crackers, British Butter and "Cheedar". So far, so normal. What stood out for me was the accompaniment to the mains, a dish of spicy cous-cous  salad, matching neither cuisine.
We are making a New World (Paul Nash, 1918)

barakta

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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #1 on: June 25, 2019, 08:10:43 pm »
Someone I know is on a low-fibre diet for disability reasons and asked for low-fibre food on a trans-atlantic flight... Airline said "No can do, will vegetarian suffice?". Person wasn't allowed to take their own food on plane which meant they had to go without - which with Crohn's disease isn't good for them either... I would have made a much bigger fucking stink.

ian

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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #2 on: June 25, 2019, 09:18:01 pm »
How on earth do they stop you taking your own food on a plane? Plenty of people buy food in the airport and then insist on masticating loudly in my ear until I use their head to plug the hole I just made in the window with the very same head. Aeroplane windows are just the right size for fat heads or noisy toddlers. Coincidence, I think not.

I'm pretty sure the list of food-types now fairly extensive for most airlines, since intolerances and self-diagnosed allergies are practically a sport. I'm not intolerant of gluten, it actually drives me into a rage. Like the Hulk. I'm also allergic to the colour yellow. But only on Tuesdays. Write it down. I would die if I saw a dandelion. I once did.

They only option they tend to lack is tasty. That's the thing that narks me about the trend to cut out food and like, I mean seriously, how much does a microwave meal and glass of el cheapo vino really add to a couple of hundred quid ticket. Oh, I know it's a scam to drive upgrades, so you can enjoy the bounty of the 'sky chef' and his merry crew of microwave ovens and storage carts. It basically means they put the same food on a plate, allow you to use cutlery that doesn't look like it was stolen from a psychiatric hospital, and make the crew remember your name. Also the wine doesn't taste like someone mixed Vimto with screen wash. That said, in economy, I still ask for a second glass. Oh come ye blessed anaesthesia and quilt my soul.

I always avoid the pasta, it's weird Lovecraftian sludge. Chicken is typically vulcanized so any attempt to cut it is liable to send the contents of your meal tray skittering off in several directions, whereas any sauce will splatter your front and then puddle in your crotch so you have to line up in immigration looking like you've acquired a virulent new venereal disease. Veg curry is usually a safe option, there's limited scope to break it. I've no idea who comes up the combinations of starter vs. main but we should celebrate their diabolical genius. I think the last time I had curry, the starter was olive and feta salad. It could catch on.
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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #3 on: June 25, 2019, 09:25:32 pm »
I’m guessing that Crohn’s friendly food isn’t readily available airside, and possibly isn’t allowed through security?  Hmm security will not allow “wet” food through, but sandwiches are allowed. Actually I saw a lot of cheese going through at Minneapolis.
We are making a New World (Paul Nash, 1918)

ian

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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #4 on: June 25, 2019, 09:31:54 pm »
Provided you eat it on the plane and it's not liquid, there's nothing I know of to stop you packing your own food.
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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #5 on: June 25, 2019, 10:11:20 pm »
Food in sauce is likely to be a problem, but other than that I’d agree with you. At Minneapolis there was a group of young ladies setting off to trek in Alaska for 40 days, and their hand baggage (God knows why they didn’t check it in) was literally bags full of dried food for the whole trip!  It ALL got hand searched and swabbed - milk powder looked like drugs and cheese (I think) looked like plastique.
We are making a New World (Paul Nash, 1918)

T42

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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #6 on: June 26, 2019, 07:53:40 am »
Airline cheese probably was plastic.

I can only really remember two airline meals. One was breakfast on an SAS flight to Copenhagen, where they managed to magic up hot bacon & eggs within 15 minutes of leaving Stuttgart. The other was a AA Frankfurt-Dallas where we were upgraded to 1st class: caviare starter with a choice of IIRC venison or turbot. Bloody good wine, too.

Security back then was a single question: did you pack your bag yourself?

I was always rather sad that the Pan Am Clippers were 50 years gone by the time I started the transatlantic bit.
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Mr Larrington

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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #7 on: June 26, 2019, 08:57:44 am »
FOAF was prevented from going through security at $USANIAN_AIRPORT with home-made sandwiches and had to eat them before she was allowed airside.
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Regulator

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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #8 on: June 26, 2019, 09:14:44 am »
I’m guessing that Crohn’s friendly food isn’t readily available airside, and possibly isn’t allowed through security?  Hmm security will not allow “wet” food through, but sandwiches are allowed. Actually I saw a lot of cheese going through at Minneapolis.

The problem is that there isn't really such a specific thing as "Crohn's friendly food".  What foods will affect people with Crohn's varies from person to person and is also impacted by such factors as where within the GI system the inflammation and ulceration is located.  It's one of the reasons (along with there being multiple possible causes/triggers for Crohn's) that makes it so difficult to treat.

Like barakta, I'd have made a bigger stink with the airline.
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ian

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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #9 on: June 26, 2019, 09:52:33 am »
Do people really die if they don't eat for a few hours? I know some people find a movie hard going without a dustbin full of popcorn, several bags of Doritos, enough nachos to coat the entire seat in radioactive cheese product, and hot dog (dog, one presumes, as in food).

Anyway, there's nothing in the rules that I can find that says you can't take your own sandwich unless it's bomb shaped or made out of sauce. It's only the ban on a flask of tea that prevents British people flying to their destination to eat their sandwiches and drink their tea while looking out of the plane window and then coming home again.

I always eat on planes because it fills several minutes of boredom and there's a particular theatre to inflight meals that they've not entirely managed to kill. Whoo, little pudding!

Speaking of things I'd like to kill, the person, who halfway through the service, when you're sitting there contemplating the dissection of a rubberized piece of chicken with a plastic knife from the Maudsley danger ward, decides that's the very time to go to the bathroom.

To be quite honest, I'm quite enjoying not having to get on an aeroplane every week or so.
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barakta

  • Bastard lovechild of Yomiko Readman and Johnny 5
Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #10 on: June 26, 2019, 02:58:07 pm »
I'm wary of this being horrible about dietary needs cos for everyone who is maybe a flake, there are others who benefit from the increased availability of X-free foods for a genuine dietary issue. There IS an increase in dietary sensitivities and autoimmune conditions which is not well understood - Crohn's is auto immune...

The dietary requirement in my friend's case is probably temporary as the diagnosis is quite recent and they're still stabilising treatment - a git of a disease to treat - and longer term friend may be able to eat more fibre, but not yet... Also being new to having a serious condition is partly why friend didn't raise more of a stink given she gave the airline weeks and weeks notice which they didn't use effectively to meet friend's needs.

Crohn's is also very variable, some people can be pretty well with it most of the time if they get treatment/lifestyle right, others are horribly ill with it whatever they do...

Regulator

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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #11 on: June 26, 2019, 05:10:03 pm »
I'm wary of this being horrible about dietary needs cos for everyone who is maybe a flake, there are others who benefit from the increased availability of X-free foods for a genuine dietary issue. There IS an increase in dietary sensitivities and autoimmune conditions which is not well understood - Crohn's is auto immune...

The dietary requirement in my friend's case is probably temporary as the diagnosis is quite recent and they're still stabilising treatment - a git of a disease to treat - and longer term friend may be able to eat more fibre, but not yet... Also being new to having a serious condition is partly why friend didn't raise more of a stink given she gave the airline weeks and weeks notice which they didn't use effectively to meet friend's needs.

Amen to that!  I had a torrid time of it for about 10 years (up until my mid to late 20s) after which time it quietened down, with only occasional flare ups.

Quote
Crohn's is also very variable, some people can be pretty well with it most of the time if they get treatment/lifestyle right, others are horribly ill with it whatever they do...

Although I haven't had a bad flare up for about 10 years now, I still suffer from the long term effects of disease itself and the side effects of the treatment (which in my case involved long-term, high dose immuno-suppressants and steroids).
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hellymedic

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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #12 on: June 26, 2019, 07:33:17 pm »
ian, Mr Larrington has posted upthread about someone who was not allowed to take their own sandwiches onto a plane.

People don't die if unfed for the duration of most flights but:

Once you are sitting on the plane, it's often the first time in MANY hours when you are actually sitting still and CAN eat. Many travellers will have left their home in too much of a rush/panic/worry to have been able to eat. There then follows a trip to the airport, which is suboptimal for eating and long check-in times when the traveller is standing/queuing/schlepping bags etc.

On flights I've taken recently, it's often six hours from leaving home till I'm likely to be fed on a plane. I can't eat on the hoof.

I'm an omnivore which is very useful but I sympathise with any who aren't.

Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #13 on: June 26, 2019, 08:10:14 pm »
We don't get airline meals on the sort of short-haul flights we take. So we take sandwiches for the plane, and for the coach transfer. We generally have some pizza and some sausages as well. We also fill up water bottles at the fountain that's just 'airside' at Manchester.

Ski holidays are especially good for my green credentials, as they allow me to fill in boxes about how many journeys I've taken on public transport. The airport bus at Grenoble, the transfer coach to Val d'Isere, the bus in resort and all the lifts add up, not to mention the plane itself.

barakta

  • Bastard lovechild of Yomiko Readman and Johnny 5
Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #14 on: June 26, 2019, 09:33:40 pm »
I haven't been on a plane for 19 years so for me it's moot, but it is the principle of the thing. Either they need to stop the security theatre about food onna plane OR they need to comply with people's stated dietary needs - they shouldn't be able to have it both ways.

It's a definite position of privilege to be able to eat most things or do without food for periods of time.

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #15 on: June 26, 2019, 11:58:15 pm »
I really don't get many migraines1 (and even fewer headaches with them) but seem to recall my worst have been associated with travel and the irregular eating that generates.

Being able to eat and drink almost anything offered keeps me well. It's a relief to have given up any pretence of Kosher etc.

1) I get optical ± other neurological symptoms or puking.

Mr Larrington

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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #16 on: June 27, 2019, 07:54:19 am »
The sum total of my food and drink intake on the last two flights I've taken has been 1 (one) cup of coffee and 1 (one) Tunnocks Caramel Wafer.
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ian

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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #17 on: June 27, 2019, 09:24:27 am »
Honestly, I've flown a lot (to 100+ countries, I'm sure). You can take food on planes. It's a thing. No, you can't take:

(a) sandwiches made out of endangered species, or really any form of barbecued animal covered by CITES.

(b) don't attempt to get around this by keeping the live version of the animal in your hand baggage for inflight slaughter and preparation. (Exempted in some former Soviet republics.)

(c) food made primarily out of liquid or food that's been around so long that it has turned to liquid and made some progress towards sentience.

(d) peanuts, obviously, as even undetectable levels can be fatal to people who aren't even on the same plane.

OK, they might frown if you turned up a doner kebab as they smell like someone has heated up a month-old dead badger unless it's dark.

I've done a deep analysis of the available stats – no one has died of starvation on a plane. Airline food is far more likely to kill than it's absence.

Airlines are pretty willing to bend to get you your halal, kosher, gluten-free, dandelion-free meal, and the QC of their supplier will always ensure it tastes like chewed cardboard and despair regardless.

Travelling by air is a festival of bad food, tbh, from the endless airport concessions (businesses you are often sure went bust in the outside world) to the lukewarm inflight 'pasta or chicken' (what actually is it? I think it's brown, sir).

I think, tbh, it's a bit of privilege of modern life in a first world country to be able to eat what we want when we want.
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Mr Larrington

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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #18 on: June 27, 2019, 06:01:47 pm »
We are planning on testing the tolerance of Loganair, BA and Sumburgh and Glasgow airports on Saturday, having purchased the raw materials for sandwiches.
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Cudzoziemiec

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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #19 on: June 27, 2019, 06:51:01 pm »
It's a definite position of privilege to be able to eat most things or do without food for periods of time.
I think, tbh, it's a bit of privilege of modern life in a first world country to be able to eat what we want when we want.
This and this.

Being able to eat any old stuff or nothing is a privilege from health, but I think in this case it's one that most people around the world enjoy. I'm not sure if privilege is the right word in such a case, as opposed to other privileges which appear to be normal but which in fact only apply to at most half the population (canonically being male and white, of course); perhaps "power" would be a better word? But it might be better to point out that those who can't do this are "dis-privileged" in this way (somewhat akin to being deprived of rights).

As for having all sorts of food at all sorts of times, patently privilege and probably correlates well with flying.

And security theatre really ought to end.
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Kim

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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #20 on: June 27, 2019, 07:34:05 pm »
20 posts on airline food and nobody has stressed the importance of not eating the fish...

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ElyDave

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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #21 on: June 28, 2019, 08:55:55 am »
I NEVER eat the fish

Mostly short haul these days, where you don't even get a tiny bottle of wine and a smaller bag of crisps, so I normally plan around being at the airport around a mealtime and eating there, or in the airline lounge (Frequent flyer status on several). I've not died of hunger, or had to eat any fellow passengers yet - though there was this guy used to regularly fly ABZ-NWI when i did that route who looked like he'd eaten half a plane's worth. He needed both seats and a seatbelt extension.

Quite frankly airline food isn't really worth it unless you're in business class, and then it's only a way to kill another hour of a long haul flight. I only fly business if the client is paying, and once using miles to Stockholm.

“Procrastination is the thief of time, collar him.” –Charles Dickens

ian

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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #22 on: June 28, 2019, 12:24:38 pm »
While the food is a bit better in business class (mostly they posh it up by serving it on plates with a proper knife and fork and give you an actual choice that doesn't comprise of pasta vs. chicken), considering you are paying a couple of thousand pounds extra over economy, it bloody ought to be.

As for the midget bags of crisps and the like that have replaced actual meals, they can fuck off and then fuck off so more. I mean, seriously, you can't actually stretch to an actual full-size pack of crisps.
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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #23 on: June 28, 2019, 12:33:05 pm »
TBH, it's a bit academic how good the food is when the humidity (or rather, the lack thereof) and air pressure in a passenger aircraft at cruising altitude is playing havoc with your taste buds and sinuses so you can't taste it properly anyway.
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ElyDave

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Re: Random Airline Food Combinations
« Reply #24 on: June 28, 2019, 02:10:58 pm »
Thats why you always spice it up to the hilt and drink it with mega robust red wines or G&T
“Procrastination is the thief of time, collar him.” –Charles Dickens