Food Crimes

[TheLurker]

If you're even slightly tempted to take this thread seriously, don't.

I'll start.

Sugar on shortbread.

[Tim Hall]

If you're even slightly tempted to take this thread seriously, don't.

I'll start.

Sugar on shortbread.

Whiskers on kittens?

[FifeingEejit]

If you're even slightly tempted to take this thread seriously, don't.

I'll start.

Sugar on shortbread.

 

Only improvement over added sugar is Deep Fried.

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Tomato Sauce on Stovies

[Basil]

Bloody pea shoots with absolutely everything 

[ian]

Goats cheese in anything. That's what threw me off the vegetarian wagon some years ago, the fact that singular vegetarian menu option in many restaurants invariable featured the foetid fromage.

[Mr Larrington]

Apricots.  All of 'em.  Anywhere.

[Canardly]

Andouillette.

[Little Jim]

Cafes that put the paper napkin UNDER the cake on the plate.  OK it stops it blowing away if you are sitting outside but also makes it useless for the intended purpose if it is covered in jam/syrup/whatever from the cake.

[rafletcher]

Vegetable marrows. And squashes.

[Flite]

Have to agree with the napkin location problem, just why?

My pet hate is cheese scones that contain sugar.
I suspect lazy kitchen people (I would not call them cooks or chefs) buying one bulk bag of "scone mix" with sugar and just bunging in some cheese.
Seems to be a particular problem in Scotland....

[Kim]

Beer batter.  If I want^[1] some beer with my chish'n'fips, I'll order a pint.


_{[1] Spoiler: I don't.}

[Flite]

Goats cheese in anything.

I like most goat's cheese, but why do so many cafes put honey with it? YUK
And the vegetarian option on a menu often uses up goat's cheese than has been lurking in the back of the fridge, we have no other choice and they seem to think we won't notice...

[L CC]

Celery. Just don't. It's a salad not a punishment.

[Paul H]

Poor quality bread in a cafe. You penny pinching bastards, I don't mind spending three or four quid on a sandwich, as long as you're buying a decent loaf rather than using the cheapest from Costco.

[T42]

Fugu fish & chips.  Just a thought.

Andouillette.

Love it.

Vegetable marrows. And squashes.

And cucumberbatch and courgette. Although the latter can be cooked in such a way as to resemble food rather than snot it usually isn't.

[Tim Hall]

Fugu fish & chips.  Just a thought.

Andouillette.

Love it.

Vegetable marrows. And squashes.

And cucumberbatch and courgette. Although the latter can be cooked in such a way as to resemble food rather than snot it usually isn't.

Sliced lengthways, brushed with olive oil, grilled. Grind or several of black pepper.

[Wowbagger]

Celery. Just don't. It's a salad not a punishment.

Most salad is a punishment. There's an expression in this house: "duty salad". It's like a trip to the gym. No fun at all, but good for you.

[FifeingEejit]

Have to agree with the napkin location problem, just why?

My pet hate is cheese scones that contain sugar.
I suspect lazy kitchen people (I would not call them cooks or chefs) buying one bulk bag of "scone mix" with sugar and just bunging in some cheese.
Seems to be a particular problem in Scotland....

Scottish cook books are just normal cook books but with all the sugar quantities doubled, occasionally quadrupled

[Kim]

Celery. Just don't. It's a salad not a punishment.

Celery is for feeding to guinea pigs, which is a rich source of teh cute.  I've no idea why a human would try to eat it.

[mrcharly-YHT]

Beef
Lamb
Mutton

It all stinks

[Mr Larrington]

Celery. Just don't. It's a salad not a punishment.

Most salad is a punishment. There's an expression in this house: "duty salad". It's like a trip to the gym. No fun at all, but good for you.

Salad is what food eats.

[ian]

Celery is one of my favourite foods. I pretty much put it in anything. It's essentially in the base of anything - onion, celery and carrot, the trinity. Plus tasty in a sandwich. I love a good salad.

Which does remind me though: fruit in salads that aren't actually fruit salads. No, really, I don't want sliced peach with my chicken or grapefruit with tuna.

[Cudzoziemiec]

Celery is good. People who don't like celery are criminals. But ian is also a criminal.

Anyway, brioche. Also croissants that don't contain chocolate.

[T42]

My favourite trinity is onion, garlic and root ginger.

[fimm]

Raw onion in salads.