Well that was an interesting conversation with EE "retention"
Me: Ive been spending big £££ (first time ever I think I have bought phones on contract, but it made sense at the time) with you for the last couple of years, comes to an end in a month, I'm thinking of moving (both my and my wife's) phones to 1p mobile, £10/25Gb plan. What can you say to convince me to stay?
Customer Services Pimply Youth Transliteration: Fuck it, nothing like it, bye
Me: But you do 10Gb for £10? If you look you'll see that while I had an unlimited plan neither of us use more than 10Gb month. I'm interested in the other bits of the deal, Wifi calling is important to me which is why I'm thinking of 1pmobile, Happy to chuck other stuff like Apple Music and Netflix in if it helps, and I'm happy to consider a small premium for the convenience of not moving. Any help?
CSPY: WiFi calling is a function of your phone
Me: No it isn't. The capability is in your phone but your network provider has to enable it.
CSPY: 100% no - it's in your phone, I know because I'm in the tech business (<= last bit is a quote)
Me: Let's not argue about that. Can you give me any reason why I should stay with EE?
CSPY: We're the fastest network
Me: 1pmobile buy your network
CSPY: Yes but we only sell them a small percentage. You won't get the EE speed and coverage, Google it. It would be like going into a Mercedes garage and asking for a car the same price as a Ford ( <==quote)
Me: <tappity tap> I just googled it. 1pmobile is as fast as EE according to reviews. Oh and by the way, I have an E Class Mercedes that I bought new from a dealer at the same price as not-very-big Ford ( <==quote, and fact),
One last question - am I talking to the retention team? I am? so this is as good as it gets.
Bye.
Note: Quantities of "Oh yes they are" and "Oh no they're not" have been edited out for clarity.
