Finally, my write up:
The muffins came out of the oven at 9:05pm, it was touch and go if we would make the train at 9:28, but with scant regard for the dear and considerate drivers of Portsmouth make it we did. We had a very pleasant conversation with another cyclist on the train:
"Where are you going?"
"London, you?"
"Havant, I'm off home; you cycling back to Portsmouth then?"
"No, Southend."
"Why?"
Well it was a fair question really.
It was around Havant that we realised that we hadn't checked the tyres for 'bits', thankfully by this point the carriage was empty, so we flipped the bikes and did an inspection. One bit of glass out of Vern's front tyre and then the discovery of a thorn in my rear tyre, there was a decision to be made, I must have picked that thorn up in the Hebrides a week ago and my tyre was still fully inflated, do I leave it and hope for the best or do I pull it out and hope the tube isn't already holed? No choice really; it took 5 minutes with the Leatherman before the unmistakeable sound of psssssssssssssssssssssssst as I finally got the little blighter out - ho hum. Still, we were on the train, it was warm and dry and we entertained anybody who accidentally got into our carriage (and then very rapidly and unaccidentally passed down the train).
Once at Waterloo we stocked up on the forgotten ingredient (water) and cash, then headed over the bridge, up The Strand, The Mall and Constitution Hill to the rendezvous. I was delighted to not have to kill anybody on the way, although the nice man with the blue Mercedes who gave me all of 4 inches clearance whilst trying to jockey for position coming into Traf Sq was probably lucky that I was in a good mood.
Once at HPC we greeted old friends and a few new ones before the set off; the inestimable Mr L3 introduced himself to the group, explained how it all worked, yelled his mobile number for all to hear and then led us on our way. After a brief pitstop at some interesting toilets (interesting only in a 'that was interesting, next time I'll just pee in the Thames' kind of way.) we headed on past the Mayoral Gaff and towards Greenwich where there was a hill, thankfully I had enough gears to get up it very slowly and in a twiddly way whilst watching all the racing snakes belting past me like it wasn't even up
. Onwards to Shooters Hill (repeat the above) and down the other side and revenge on all the lightweights as gravity assist kicked in, bwahahahahaha.
Dartford Tunnel, ah yes, Dartford Tunnel, time to get the muffins out (yes TG that was me, but Vern cooked them, I was only doling them out and sorry if they were a bit soggy, cooling muffins in a plastic box isn't the best idea in the world). Well all the riders and all the bikes made it across, I was a bit disheartened by the comment "Bl00dy hell, that's a brick" as my bike was lifted off the trailer (at least I think that's what was said, I may have misheard). We headed up to the services where to my amazment they had soya milk, so I got a soya latte - it was truly disgusting, made drinkable by three sugars to disguise the taste or lack thereof. Damn you to heck lactose intolerence
.
I kind of forget the ride from here, there was another hill, a lack of cars, pleasant chat with a fellow rider (hello person in Fasso Bortolo gear) and Billericay, but not necessarily in that order. Then there was an interesting roundabout thing where a driver stopped to allow us all through. Finally we got to Southend where the rump of the group had a brief do we go left or right moment before deciding on right and being correct. We headed along the seafront, paid homage to a radio station and wandered into the Rose where, with excellent timing, I was in the toilet when the proprietor said does anybody else want a fried breakfast so I failed to witness the show of hands.
I had the dubious honour of being on the receiving end of the 'semi-vegitarian' breakfast so I can report that it had beans, tomato, fried bread, mushrooms and an egg and it was very good; I did wonder if the other veggie breakfasts were vegan?
So to home; we followed Andrij to the station and watched one train pull out as we sorted tickets out (thanks to NSTN for her Network Card), so we entertained ourselves for a while trying to fit the bikes onto the next train, thankfully Tim pointed us at the bit where the seats fold up, we'd missed that totally and were merrily blocking a doorway. We chatted and dozed to Liverpool Street then carried our bikes up the escalator before cycling towards Waterloo, deciding not to fight with trucks and buses on the way, we bid farewell to Tim just before London Bridge and NSTN just after it. Got home at 11:30 and slept for most of the day, got a take-away Thai dinner and slept for another 11 hours.
