Author Topic: First Audax- it has to be done, please recommend one  (Read 1160 times)


  • Quiet please
First Audax- it has to be done, please recommend one
« on: March 02, 2009, 01:51:19 pm »
It is with a measure of alarm that I notice that no one has warned you of the real dangers of wanting to ride a 200.

I talk not of the mileage, the terrain or the "arcane rules of AUK". It is the foray into the seemingly harmless world of Audax that is where the real risks to wealth and domestic or marital bliss truly lie.

If you are lucky, you will suffer an epic fail on your first attempt. You'll give the idea up as a bad job and your life will continue very much as it is now. The pain of a DNF will soon ebb and within a month, you will shrug your shoulders and say "Oh, Audax? I tried that once and it wasn't for me. I don't need to do that sort of thing to enjoy riding my bike". Within a year, you will have probably forgotten all about it.

However, if you are one of the hapless many that have been sucked into the AUK underworld, finishing your first 200 won't be enough. You will be just one step further towards an obsession that will leave your friends shaking their heads and your spouse/partner wondering what went wrong and where you have gone.

People that would have ridden pootles with you in the past will now treat you with an air of mistrust and will say things like "...but we've heard all about your cycle rides and just want a bike ride, not some bloody endurance event".

Trips to see friends or family will become an excuse to squeeze in a DIY 200 or even DIY 300. You'll become excited about getting up at 3am on a Saturday morning to cycle the 125+ miles you would otherwise shared with your wife/partner in the comfort of your car; eating wine gums and experiencing together the delights of the Light Programme.

Simple events like FNRTTC or the Dun Run will just be an excuse to ride to/from London to start/return from the ride, doubling the distance you would have normally considered appropriate.

Places like 24hr service stations and tea rooms will take a new prominence in your life and you will be overburdened with the knowledge of how much a toasted tea cake costs across the whole of southern England.

Through taking part in events, you will start to socially mix with men and women that your close friends and family will never quite understand, regard as 'cycling weirdos' and never fully accept as being part of your life.

Sure, you'll fool yourself that you are in control and can quit at any time but that, dear Gandalf, is an illusion. Once you have crossed the line, where you no longer measure a ride by distance but by time, there is no way out and your life will never be the same again.

My advice is leave it all well alone.

Think on.