Author Topic: Befuddling Child Utterances  (Read 127044 times)

Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1000 on: June 06, 2018, 01:41:33 pm »
Weird one the other day. I'd been for a sports massage, and as I was sorting myself out prior to cycling off I was accosted by a girl of about 10 or maybe a bit older - I really don't have a good idea about how to tell a child's age. Anyway the dialogue went something like this:
Her: Did that lady massage your boobs?
Me: No.
Her: You should have got her to massage your boobs.
Me: It was a massage for my foot, which is sore from running.
Her: Next time you should get her to massage your boobs.
Me: Why would I want a massage on my boobs? <Cycles off quickly>

I found it slightly disturbing, though I wonder in retrospect if I am just bringing an adult's perspective to a "boob massage" and she'd heard someting about breast cancer awareness, for example.

Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1001 on: June 06, 2018, 05:39:52 pm »
That sounds pretty odd! Could be a pre teen determined to shock or make you feel awkward.
Quote from: Kim
^ This woman knows what she's talking about.

Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1002 on: June 07, 2018, 04:31:07 pm »
That sounds pretty odd! Could be a pre teen determined to shock or make you feel awkward.
Well she certainly succeeded on both counts... is this 'normal' (FSVO normal) behaviour for a pre teen?

Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1003 on: June 07, 2018, 09:40:26 pm »
I think making adults feel awkward can be pretty normal for some pre teens. Still, that persistence with a random stranger for a lone child is odd.
Quote from: Kim
^ This woman knows what she's talking about.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Eating all the pies and drinking all the tea.
Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1004 on: October 13, 2018, 08:13:23 pm »
"Why were the 1960s so crinkly?"

Actually not that befuddling, as he explained he'd been watching Mad Men which featured a crinkly sofa and rustly clothes.
Days become simply the spaces between dreams, spaces between the shifting floors of time...

Kim

  • Timelord
Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1005 on: October 13, 2018, 08:19:12 pm »
To give the ash somewhere to accumulate.
Careful, Kim. Your sarcasm's showing...

Cudzoziemiec

  • Eating all the pies and drinking all the tea.
Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1006 on: October 13, 2018, 09:02:01 pm »
That was actually his other observation: he'd watched an episode where Don Draper has a health check-up, which he passes with flying lungs. But he's always smoking and drinking!
Days become simply the spaces between dreams, spaces between the shifting floors of time...

Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1007 on: October 20, 2018, 06:42:13 am »
Wilf, sitting on the sofa watching TV: 'I can feel the planet move'. ;D

Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1008 on: October 28, 2018, 05:40:35 pm »
Saturday afternoon
Me: Have you brushed your teeth today?
Dyl: No, it’s the weekend.
L'enfer, c'est les autos.

Kim

  • Timelord
Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1009 on: October 28, 2018, 05:41:17 pm »
Wilf, sitting on the sofa watching TV: 'I can feel the planet move'. ;D

Fracking?  ;D
Careful, Kim. Your sarcasm's showing...

Arellcat

  • Velonautte
Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1010 on: March 12, 2019, 10:00:38 pm »
Anders and I were out for a walk. Ahead, he saw a cat. He called to it, and it stopped for a moment, looked at him, and then went on.

A: "Well, one time it recognized me. Maybe it has indonesia."

Ah, how time flies and one's children are suddenly all grown up.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Eating all the pies and drinking all the tea.
Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1011 on: March 22, 2019, 06:31:24 pm »
"Aquinas is like my chemistry textbook. He likes to babble on and it doesn't always make sense."
(Actually, he likes chemistry.)
Days become simply the spaces between dreams, spaces between the shifting floors of time...

Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1012 on: April 04, 2019, 02:46:48 pm »
"How come all the graves are in the graveyard?"

I think he was imagining lots of nearly dead people hanging round the graveyard so as to be ready.
Quote from: Kim
^ This woman knows what she's talking about.

tiermat

  • According to Jane, I'm a Unisex SpaceAdmin
Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1013 on: April 29, 2019, 03:51:50 pm »
Just to show that age is no barrier, TLD (15 and 1/4): I don't want to listen to Absolute 00's on the stereo*, dad as Frank Skinner was on there, earlier and it was all boring talking.
ME: What do you want to listen to it on, then?
TLD: The Google Home as that station only plays music on the Google Home.
ME: ???

A little later it became apparent that she blamed me for Frank Skinner.  Perfectly normal point of view, I think, from a teen!

*We have an internet connected stereo and a Google Home Mini in the kitchen, both get used for listening to streaming radio stations.
I feel like Captain Kirk, on a brand new planet every day, a little like King Kong on top of the Empire State

Kim

  • Timelord
Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1014 on: April 29, 2019, 03:56:31 pm »
You'd think 15 would be old enough to grok that a radio station (even a streaming one) was a thing where somebody else decides what you listen to, so presumably she's got a weird idea about the uniqueness of a given station.

Frank skinner is, of course, all your fault.
Careful, Kim. Your sarcasm's showing...

tiermat

  • According to Jane, I'm a Unisex SpaceAdmin
Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1015 on: April 29, 2019, 04:23:09 pm »
To be fair she was coming off the back of multiple evenings of work, 2 weeks of revision and a couple of sleep overs, thus logic didn't really come into it!
I feel like Captain Kirk, on a brand new planet every day, a little like King Kong on top of the Empire State

Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1016 on: August 15, 2019, 08:30:55 pm »
Louis and I went for a ride today. At one point I was explaining my thoughts on how drivers see cyclists when Louis said I was Plato on a bicycle.

That’ll do.
L'enfer, c'est les autos.

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1017 on: August 15, 2019, 08:33:40 pm »
Wrong thread!  :) :) ;D

Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1018 on: August 15, 2019, 09:19:56 pm »
But we don’t have a Flattering Child Utterances thread.
L'enfer, c'est les autos.

Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1019 on: December 26, 2019, 12:21:08 pm »
"Kylie Minogue ... never heard of her ... is he from Coldplay?" - Miss Dan the Younger.

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Re: Befuddling Child Utterances
« Reply #1020 on: January 15, 2020, 10:19:12 pm »
"This looks like sand, this bit like the sea, and this bit like some unspeakable horror." - Miss Dan the Younger, describing a berry cheesecake in a pot.

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