Author Topic: Spiking food in a student communual fridge  (Read 7144 times)

barakta

  • Bastard lovechild of Yomiko Readman and Johnny 5
Re: Spiking food in a student communual fridge
« Reply #75 on: February 01, 2011, 04:45:27 pm »
I'd go with: "Please don't eat my food because it's stealing and please don't smoke inside because it stinks - and I'm asthmatic"

Doesn't work.  We tried that on our skanky food stealer.  He specifically stole only from the non biologists/chemists and just carried on being a selfish git. 

I do like some of these suggestions :D Thankfully I live with just Kim and we share food and don't finish the last of something without letting the other know so it's replaceable.

andym

  • Expat Cyclist
    • AndysRockets
Re: Spiking food in a student communual fridge
« Reply #76 on: February 01, 2011, 05:29:32 pm »
For the fags, you used to be able to get tiny smokebomb pellets that would wedge inside the end of the fag.  Remember nicking my dad's fags and secretly sticking a couple in when I was about 13. Got a rollocking that evening, cos he smoked that fag in the car while commuting half way up the A2 to London, and the car filled with smoke!
Wouldn't work so well these days, now that so many fags have to be smoked outdoors in the snow.
AndyM

Cudzoziemiec

  • Waking up now, put the kettle on!
Re: Spiking food in a student communual fridge
« Reply #77 on: February 01, 2011, 07:39:53 pm »
Dunno - some humiliations work better when there is an audience of strangers to laugh and point.
I do not ride a great big Mercian, gangster tanwalls, fixed cog in the back.

Re: Spiking food in a student communual fridge
« Reply #78 on: February 01, 2011, 08:07:12 pm »
I'd go with: "Please don't eat my food because it's stealing and please don't smoke inside because it stinks - and I'm asthmatic"

 ::-) ::-)

Just get your lad to confront him again. When hes in the kitchen, with no way out tell him that he knows he is stealing his food. Tell him to not keep stealing it, its not his food to take. He can stand there saying he hasnt, but you know he has. If he does, things of his will go missing.

Starting with his lighters. It can be a bugger when you need a fag and you cant find a lighter. They are bound to be left about at some time, into the pocket then stomped on outside. Or take a bit out that renders the lighter useless. Or alter the lighter so the flame is massive

If he says that your stealing his lighters and whatever else gets taken, tell him its probably the same person stealing your food.

Or, smile at him one day to greet him, look him in the eye and smack him when he least expects it.


Don't question. It makes people angry.

clarion

  • Tyke
Re: Spiking food in a student communual fridge
« Reply #79 on: February 01, 2011, 08:37:45 pm »
As a bored teenager spending lots of time in hospital with a load of old blokes who smoked despite their dreadful COPD, I found that a fingernail clipping is easily inserted into the fag, and smells horrid as it burns.
Getting there...

Re: Spiking food in a student communual fridge
« Reply #80 on: February 01, 2011, 10:51:13 pm »
You can cut cut the string off the white paper tube that forms the explosive charge of a party popper to make a very satisfying cigarette banger.

ian

  • fatuously disingenuous
    • The Suburban Survival Guide
Re: Spiking food in a student communual fridge
« Reply #81 on: February 02, 2011, 10:27:10 am »
A traditional part of communal living is the laissez-faire attitude to the contents of the fridge by some housemates. The rule is that there is always one. Poisoning them, whilst immensely satisfactory, is generally not wise, since you just end up communal living on a larger scale courtesy of Her Maj. We solved the problem with our crappy student flatmate by simply having no food other than teabags, milk, and a vintage tub of Stork margarine. Since the milk was generally so advanced into its cheesehood that it would have scared a French man and Stork is made from fish heads and industrial byproducts, he was welcome to them. Well, nursey flatmate occasionally brought packages home and left them in the fridge, but it was generally accepted they were body parts, and as such, not to be unwrapped.

His pinnacle of uselessness was his inability to pay the rent in any other fashion than random payments distinguished by the fact that those payments were always far less than the amount owed. Eventually, at the end of term, in collusion with another housemate’s parents, whilst he was out, we loaded everything he owned into a van and had them take it away. We retreated to the pub to write a ransom note. Oh, he wasn’t happy when he got back to a room empty but for the note pinned to the wall. He did call the police but they weren’t, once we explained the matter over a soothing cup of cheesy tea, entirely sympathetic to his plight.

About a month or so after the end of term, we all met up in a empty car park in Salford and did the exchange. All his manky belongings in exchange for an envelope of cash. Oddly, he never spoke to us again.
!nataS pihsroW

arabella

  • no se porque yo no lo se
Re: Spiking food in a student communual fridge
« Reply #82 on: February 02, 2011, 10:47:55 am »
It has to be said that I only ever had a problem with food theft in the halls of residents.  In the end I gave up buying anything interesting except to eat straightaway, kept anything not needing a fridge in my room etc.
I then copied everyone else and plundered stuff.  Not very much and only once.
In the dark, all views are the same.

ian

  • fatuously disingenuous
    • The Suburban Survival Guide
Re: Spiking food in a student communual fridge
« Reply #83 on: February 02, 2011, 10:59:13 am »
It has to be said that I only ever had a problem with food theft in the halls of residents.  In the end I gave up buying anything interesting except to eat straightaway, kept anything not needing a fridge in my room etc.
I then copied everyone else and plundered stuff.  Not very much and only once.

Well, in halls, we didn't steal the food, we stole the fridge. Well, we didn't steal, we exchanged. Our empty slightly malodorous boy fridge for a well-stocked fridge from the female corridors. Evil, undoubtedly, but sometimes you have to indulge the inner caveman.
!nataS pihsroW