Author Topic: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.  (Read 628239 times)

Kim

  • 2nd in the world
Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10950 on: April 08, 2019, 06:52:30 pm »
Bake means bake!

I appear to have rescued the bread using exactly this strategy   :thumbsup:
To ride the Windcheetah, first, you must embrace the cantilever...

Mrs Pingu

  • Who ate all the pies? Me
    • Twitter
Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10951 on: April 08, 2019, 07:02:40 pm »
Biscuit means biscuit
Do not clench. It only makes it worse.

Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10952 on: April 08, 2019, 07:18:51 pm »
Brexit means Brexit mmm oh eerrrrrr........ ::-)
Get a bicycle. You will never regret it, if you live- Mark Twain

ian

  • fatuously disingenuous
    • The Suburban Survival Guide
Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10953 on: April 09, 2019, 04:57:59 pm »
The mothership have finally noticed that I've been expensing my home internet since the days of steam (it's apparently a service these days, like electricity and gas, so they don't cover it, which proves modern life is rubbish).

All I need now is for EE to notice they've not billed me for data for last half a decade.
!nataS pihsroW

Cudzoziemiec

  • Solar powered, tea fuelled cycle-wol
Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10954 on: April 10, 2019, 05:16:53 pm »
This afternoon I be editing some scripts of a conference call about fish (!!), made by machine transcription. It's ridiculous. It interprets every pause as a new speaker, adds extra words where there are none, leaves sentences out, but most of all it has no sense of context. The name Elena becomes "a lender" and the best one so far (only twelve minutes into an hour's conference) is "I went to Tibet, part of Africa."

Still, this is the future and I suppose it keeps me in work for a time at least.
An ungovernable laughter, a joyous agitation which makes the summer stretching before you seem like an unrolling canvas on which you might draw those first rude pure strokes that are free. (Capote)

Kim

  • 2nd in the world
Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10955 on: April 10, 2019, 05:24:59 pm »
Yeah, lack of context is where they always flounder.
To ride the Windcheetah, first, you must embrace the cantilever...

Cudzoziemiec

  • Solar powered, tea fuelled cycle-wol
Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10956 on: April 10, 2019, 06:27:15 pm »
Yeah, lack of context is where they always flounder.
:hand: ;D
An ungovernable laughter, a joyous agitation which makes the summer stretching before you seem like an unrolling canvas on which you might draw those first rude pure strokes that are free. (Capote)

Cudzoziemiec

  • Solar powered, tea fuelled cycle-wol
Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10957 on: April 10, 2019, 07:10:59 pm »
"Bull sharks" auto-transcribed as "bullshit hawks".  ;D
An ungovernable laughter, a joyous agitation which makes the summer stretching before you seem like an unrolling canvas on which you might draw those first rude pure strokes that are free. (Capote)

Cudzoziemiec

  • Solar powered, tea fuelled cycle-wol
Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10958 on: April 11, 2019, 07:52:42 pm »
This afternoon I be editing some scripts of a conference call about fish (!!), made by machine transcription. It's ridiculous. It interprets every pause as a new speaker, adds extra words where there are none, leaves sentences out, but most of all it has no sense of context. The name Elena becomes "a lender" and the best one so far (only twelve minutes into an hour's conference) is "I went to Tibet, part of Africa."

Still, this is the future and I suppose it keeps me in work for a time at least.
Another one today on the more normal topic of media, marketing and advertising, but it's got horribly confused by Kenyan accents. Corporate finance guy says "Our cash of course has gone up as well due to better work in capital management," which the autoscripting machine has put down as "Our cash of course has gone up as well. Uh, do do better next fucking government."  :D
An ungovernable laughter, a joyous agitation which makes the summer stretching before you seem like an unrolling canvas on which you might draw those first rude pure strokes that are free. (Capote)

Tim Hall

  • I want to eat the fleeting shade of your lashes
Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10959 on: April 11, 2019, 08:53:38 pm »
This afternoon I be editing some scripts of a conference call about fish (!!), made by machine transcription. It's ridiculous. It interprets every pause as a new speaker, adds extra words where there are none, leaves sentences out, but most of all it has no sense of context. The name Elena becomes "a lender" and the best one so far (only twelve minutes into an hour's conference) is "I went to Tibet, part of Africa."

Still, this is the future and I suppose it keeps me in work for a time at least.
Years ago I read a  Frank Muir and Dennis Norden piece, presumably written for "My Word!". It involved an aerial photograph, the photographer's  girl friend called Ella and a photo interpretation unit. There was confusion whether the photograph was of the girl friend or of a mountainous country between Nepal and China.  Or as they put it: "This creation is Tibet, or part of Ella."
There are two ways you can get exercise out of a bicycle: you can
"overhaul" it, or you can ride it.  (Jerome K Jerome)

Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10960 on: April 13, 2019, 10:39:23 pm »
There’s a crack appeared in the car windscreen.  Not in front of the driver’s face, but more than a chip. The online repair booking says Thursday. A phone call says Tuesday. Good thing  we didn’t have two days of shuttling kids around the country planned. Oh...

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10961 on: April 14, 2019, 01:43:06 pm »
BT decided to meddle with my landline at around 08.50 today, which wouldn't have mattered as our phones are disconnected at that time
BUT
This caused burglar alarm to arm and beep
which caused David to wake and moan.
I said I'd investigate,
Alarm control panel shows RED locked padlock and reads AWAY

Tried to reconnect phone.
Cat 1 now demands food.
Feed Cat 1 who summons Cat 2.
Attempt to phone burglar alarm folk.
Phone is dead.

Decide to go back to bed. Disarming alarm would make it beep and annoy David.

10.55
Landline reconnects.
Cat in garage activates burglar alarm.

NOISE NOISE NOISE!
David manages to speak to alarm folk on phone which now works.

We forget half our passwords.
Silence is restored.

David now has tinnitus...

lou boutin

  • Les chaussures sont ma vie.
Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10962 on: April 14, 2019, 06:49:06 pm »
Why oh why do people think that the percentages of two related data points (ie percentage of males and females) are best represented graphically in a pie chart?  :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm:

Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10963 on: April 15, 2019, 11:31:59 am »
Okay, we have cheese strings....  :sick:   Cheese sauce, cheese itself and now, cheese screws.....

What am I talking about.... wood screws which are so soft that its like they are made of cheese. A total waste of time trying to screw them in as the head just rounds and almost impossible to take them out again.

It can't be beyond the wit of personkind to make screws which are fit for purpose....can it.... :facepalm:

Cats to the left of me, cats to the right of me, cats sitting on my keyboard making far more sense than I do.

Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10964 on: April 15, 2019, 11:54:16 am »
Made in China and imported by the container load.  I always use pozi screws these days, never a slot head.
We are making a New World (Paul Nash, 1918)

Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10965 on: April 15, 2019, 03:15:44 pm »
Made in China ……...

Of Chineseium.  Natch.

T42

  • Gaulois réfractaire
Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10966 on: April 15, 2019, 03:33:00 pm »
Made in China and imported by the container load.  I always use pozi screws these days, never a slot head.

Sounds like a racial (or other) insult. Oi, slot-head!

Cue Miss Hissy: "they're not called slot-heads these days, they've got Low-Phillips-Coefficient Syndrome". Oh, sorry.
Où sont les merguez d'antan ?

Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10967 on: April 15, 2019, 04:32:31 pm »
GKN made ubiquitous quality fixings in the day. Don't think they make screws any more.
Get a bicycle. You will never regret it, if you live- Mark Twain

Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10968 on: April 15, 2019, 04:47:38 pm »
GKN made ubiquitous quality fixings in the day. Don't think they make screws any more.

It was in the GKN factory in Birmingham that I saw one such container load of Chinese manufactured screws, and that was around 30 years ago.  At the time the factory was still making the machine screws used by Black and Decker, but the woodscrews were imported. And were so oil soaked that the cheap cardboard packaging had disintegrated in transit so they had a full container load of loose screws.

It was I believe the Heath Street Mill in Smethwick...

https://www.theurbanexplorer.co.uk/gkn-shadow-factory-tunnels-smethwick-birmingham/

The tunnels originally took lay shafts, and they in turn drove belts which went up through the floor to the various machines.
We are making a New World (Paul Nash, 1918)

mcshroom

  • Mushroom
Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10969 on: April 19, 2019, 10:37:22 am »
I just dropped my LEL mug on the kitchen floor and smashed it :(
Climbs like a sprinter, sprints like a climber!

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10970 on: April 19, 2019, 03:24:58 pm »
 :'( :'( :'(

Re: The Grumble Thread - No energy for a full on rant.
« Reply #10971 on: April 22, 2019, 08:48:47 pm »
I'm trying to book a family holiday somewhere sunny. I wish places didn't all open with a picture of a pool - they all look the bloody same.