Author Topic: Little Eye On The Provinces  (Read 151209 times)

Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1900 on: March 21, 2019, 05:48:37 pm »
Not fast & rarely furious

tweeting occasional in(s)anities as andrewxclark

Guy

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Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1901 on: March 22, 2019, 08:43:38 am »
What duck?

Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1902 on: March 22, 2019, 11:00:32 am »
Rush hour ostrich!

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-essex-47659232

One of the stories my father used to tell us as kids was the time he was partly responsible for an ostrich getting run over on Liverpools dock road.

Just after WW2 - most of the zoo populations had died during the war so there was a thriving trade for smuggling exotic animals on merchant ships returning from foreign parts
“There is no point in using the word 'impossible' to describe something that has clearly happened.”
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Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1904 on: March 27, 2019, 07:21:36 pm »
A story in our local chipwrapper today.  An ice cream man shouted at a kiddie and made him cry.  I kid ye not.

But fear not! When a rival ice cream firm heard of the little boys tears via Facebook, they dispatched one of their own ice cream vans to deliver an ice cream to the young fellow, and the balance of ying and yang is now restored.

Yep, its life and death stuff here in the Home Counties.

Not fast & rarely furious

tweeting occasional in(s)anities as andrewxclark

Kim

  • Timelord
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1906 on: April 03, 2019, 12:35:35 am »
"I think it's just people wanting more and more cars."

Bonus points for the crudely drawn wheelchair icon, there.  Must have been the cycle lane guys moonlighting.
Careful, Kim. Your sarcasm's showing...

Cudzoziemiec

  • Dormant but requires tea
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1907 on: April 03, 2019, 10:21:48 am »
The unwilling rider and the one who leaves each control in turn without reluctance, with no desire to come back, obviously cannot be making the same journey, even though their brevets are identical.

Kim

  • Timelord
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1908 on: April 03, 2019, 12:46:37 pm »
Man unlocks car in supermarket car park.
https://www.bristolpost.co.uk/whats-on/shopping/went-check-lidl-actually-stopped-2713850

I once molished Postman Piers a radio device to relay the blinks of the blinkenlight on his electricity meter to the parallel port of a convenient computer, for MRTG porpoises.  Unfortunately the electricity meter was in the garage, and the regular 433MHz pulses had a similar effect on the remote keyfob system of Snap, his kevved-up Nova.  As part of the kevving-up process involved the removal of the external key slots for the door locks, this counted as Hilarious Consequences (though, due to the provision of a SEEKRIT electrical keyswitch in a wheel arch for operating the central locking, not as much as that time he left the lights on in a multi-storey car park).
Careful, Kim. Your sarcasm's showing...

Cudzoziemiec

  • Dormant but requires tea
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1909 on: April 03, 2019, 03:10:39 pm »
Couldn't he have climbed in and out of the windows, Dukes of Hazard style? Or is that not Kev anymore?  ;D
The unwilling rider and the one who leaves each control in turn without reluctance, with no desire to come back, obviously cannot be making the same journey, even though their brevets are identical.

Kim

  • Timelord
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1910 on: April 03, 2019, 03:14:27 pm »
Good thinking, though I suspect it would have risked damaging the paintwork.
Careful, Kim. Your sarcasm's showing...

Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1911 on: April 04, 2019, 08:57:07 am »
I once molished Postman Piers a radio device to relay the blinks of the blinkenlight on his electricity meter to the parallel port of a convenient computer, for MRTG porpoises.  Unfortunately the electricity meter was in the garage, and the regular 433MHz pulses had a similar effect on the remote keyfob system of Snap, his kevved-up Nova.  As part of the kevving-up process involved the removal of the external key slots for the door locks, this counted as Hilarious Consequences (though, due to the provision of a SEEKRIT electrical keyswitch in a wheel arch for operating the central locking, not as much as that time he left the lights on in a multi-storey car park).

Sorry. No idea what any of that means.  ??? :)

Basil

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Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1912 on: April 04, 2019, 10:55:57 am »

Sorry. No idea what any of that means.  ??? :)

Kim often forgets that most of us are mere mortals.  ;)
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Torslanda

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Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1913 on: April 04, 2019, 11:49:54 am »
I once molished Postman Piers a radio device to relay the blinks of the blinkenlight on his electricity meter to the parallel port of a convenient computer, for MRTG porpoises.  Unfortunately the electricity meter was in the garage, and the regular 433MHz pulses had a similar effect on the remote keyfob system of Snap, his kevved-up Nova.  As part of the kevving-up process involved the removal of the external key slots for the door locks, this counted as Hilarious Consequences (though, due to the provision of a SEEKRIT electrical keyswitch in a wheel arch for operating the central locking, not as much as that time he left the lights on in a multi-storey car park).

Sorry. No idea what any of that means.  ??? :)

To allow monitoring of mains voltage/consumption(?), Kim made a transmit/receive device so as to link the mains at the meter with a 'puter to read the signals.

433MHz is the same frequency as most aftermarket car alarms. Hilarious quincequonces would include but not be exclusively limited to - regular locking/unlocking of the car, random alarm activations, lots of flashing lights and - well -  use your imagination...

HTH
VELOMANCER

Well that's the more blunt way of putting it but as usual he's dead right.

Kim

  • Timelord
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1914 on: April 04, 2019, 02:54:44 pm »
Nahh, it just jammed the signal so he couldn't get into his car without first climbing over it to nobble the transmitter unit.  The keyfob system was cryptographic, like modern ones, and wouldn't unlock in response to any old signal.  But the electricity meter (and transmitting device) was on the wall halfway down the garage, much closer to the car's receiver than the doorway where you'd operate the keyfob from.


The effect of a flat battery on a car with purely electric door locks left as an exercise for the reader.  (I think the AA bod eventually managed to open the bonnet from below using car thief skillz, and an inconvenient Anderson connector was later added to facilitate jump-starting the central locking in future.)
Careful, Kim. Your sarcasm's showing...

Kim

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Careful, Kim. Your sarcasm's showing...

Cudzoziemiec

  • Dormant but requires tea
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1916 on: April 05, 2019, 04:32:56 pm »
The effect of a flat battery on a car with purely electric door locks left as an exercise for the reader.  (I think the AA bod eventually managed to open the bonnet from below using car thief skillz, and an inconvenient Anderson connector was later added to facilitate jump-starting the central locking in future.)
Gerry Anderson?
The unwilling rider and the one who leaves each control in turn without reluctance, with no desire to come back, obviously cannot be making the same journey, even though their brevets are identical.

Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1917 on: April 07, 2019, 12:50:56 am »
In the frequency department, about 25+/- years ago the US Navy built a new place to park big grey boats in the nearby city where we used to live.

There were reports of residents' garage doors opening and closing on their own, not at the owners' command via remote sender, whenever certain vessels came in to port.  It was said that there were certain communications-related frequencies used in the ships' systems which told the garage doors to open. Apparently the boat operators started switching those systems off when nearing port, and the problem went away.

Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1918 on: April 07, 2019, 04:53:57 pm »
And exploding cows due to submarine comms.
Get a bicycle. You will never regret it, if you live- Mark Twain

Cudzoziemiec

  • Dormant but requires tea
The unwilling rider and the one who leaves each control in turn without reluctance, with no desire to come back, obviously cannot be making the same journey, even though their brevets are identical.

Kim

  • Timelord
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1920 on: April 08, 2019, 06:12:55 pm »
That's a legitimate complaint about Bristol, I suppose, but it hardly seems fair to put it down there with Birmingham.
Careful, Kim. Your sarcasm's showing...

Cudzoziemiec

  • Dormant but requires tea
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1921 on: April 08, 2019, 06:16:46 pm »
Where presumably the problem is "so many fucking canals."
The unwilling rider and the one who leaves each control in turn without reluctance, with no desire to come back, obviously cannot be making the same journey, even though their brevets are identical.

Kim

  • Timelord
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1922 on: April 08, 2019, 06:19:07 pm »
We've got more miles of fucking canals than fucking Venice!
Careful, Kim. Your sarcasm's showing...

Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #1923 on: April 08, 2019, 11:09:50 pm »
Where presumably the problem is "so many fucking canals."
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Sorting my life out, one shed at a time.