Author Topic: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy  (Read 7170 times)

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #50 on: November 07, 2012, 09:41:58 am »
I find that as a general rule most people don't understand resolution, especially in the context of printing or scanning.

Or in the context of pointless arguments.

Are the arguments better with Ems?
If you don't like your democracy, vote against it.

mattc

  • n.b. have grown beard since photo taken
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Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #51 on: November 07, 2012, 10:01:07 am »
Screen resolution seems to confuse people as well.

If somebody says "Make it larger", I increase the resolution of the screen. The is opposite to what some people expect. They expect the icons to get larger.
The best comparison I can think of here would be showing a kid a bug under a microscope.

If he/she/it says "Make it bigger!!!" they want to see the bug's hairs, not more of the slide it is sat on.
Has never ridden RAAM
---------
No.11  Because of the great host of those who dislike the least appearance of "swank " when they travel the roads and lanes. - From Kuklos' 39 Articles

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #52 on: November 07, 2012, 10:23:13 am »
If there are hairs on the bug then it is probably a Microsoft bug.
If you don't like your democracy, vote against it.

HTFB

  • The Monkey and the Plywood Violin
Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #53 on: November 07, 2012, 10:27:33 am »
/dev/null has no hair.

mcshroom

  • Mushroom
Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #54 on: November 07, 2012, 11:09:20 am »
Running out of memory on the hard disk.

Referring to RAM as 'Memory' (a lost battle I know). Running out of 'Memory' (ROM) on the hard disk could be considered correct in the instance you quote if you're being pedantic, although I'd use 'space' myself.
Climbs like a sprinter, sprints like a climber!

Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #55 on: November 07, 2012, 11:12:27 am »
Running out of memory on the hard disk.

Referring to RAM as 'Memory' (a lost battle I know). Running out of 'Memory' (ROM) on the hard disk could be considered correct in the instance you quote if you're being pedantic, although I'd use 'space' myself.

And then there is virtual RAM aka swap that lives on the hard drive (or maybe out on the SAN) just to confuse things.
I think you'll find it's a bit more complicated than that.

dasmoth

  • Techno-optimist
Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #56 on: November 07, 2012, 11:17:12 am »
Actually, that reminds me of a slightly more subtle, and pretty ubiquitous, one: the failure to distinguish between virtual memory (i.e. the existence of some kind of mapping scheme between logical and physical address spaces) and swapping.  The latter would be extremely challenging to implement without the former, but loads of systems run with VM but no swap.

I think I'm onto a losing battle here...

Seymour Cray almost certainly didn't say "memory is like an orgasm, it's much better if you don't have to fake it."  But I wish he had!
Half term's when the traffic becomes mysteriously less bad for a week.

LEE

Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #57 on: November 07, 2012, 11:39:48 am »
"Bunch of pedantic IT geeks who should shut the feck up and make my Internet work" when clearly it's "Bunch of pedantic IT NERDS who should shut the feck up and make my Internet work"

It's a classic mistake.


Kim

  • Timelord
Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #58 on: November 07, 2012, 02:43:32 pm »
Screen resolution seems to confuse people as well.
The best comparison I can think of here would be showing a kid a bug under a microscope.

If he/she/it says "Make it bigger!!!" they want to see the bug's hairs, not more of the slide it is sat on.

Yeah, but confusing resolution with magnification is what causes the problem in the first place.  They're different - almost but not quite opposite - concepts.  If the child says "Show me more!!" should you increase or decrease the microscope's magnification?

In my experience, children (who presumably spend a significant amount of time mucking about with graph paper) understand resolution just fine when you explain what it means.  It's adults who weren't using computers during the period where a working knowledge of video and publishing terminology[1] was required to achieve anything useful with them who have the problem.


[1] I'd argue that a lot of the terms on this thread come from those fields, and have been - quite sensibly - adopted for the computing context to avoid having to make up a whole new set of terms.
Careful, Kim. Your sarcasm's showing...

Jacomus

  • My favourite gender neutral pronoun is comrade
Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #59 on: November 07, 2012, 03:02:01 pm »
Help Desk.....

+1 ;D

'Pinging' e-mails
'My Microsoft isn't working again' = 'IE has, once again, crapped out because I refuse to use that weird Chrome thingy, mainly because it doesn't have 'internet' in it's name'
'Turn it on and off, that'll fix it'  :facepalm:
"The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity." Amelia Earhart

mattc

  • n.b. have grown beard since photo taken
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Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #60 on: November 07, 2012, 03:05:23 pm »
2 problems mentioned below have the same solution:

"Show me more!" -> "more what?"

"Make it bigger/larger!!!" -> "what is 'it' ?"

Or have I overcomplicated ...
Has never ridden RAAM
---------
No.11  Because of the great host of those who dislike the least appearance of "swank " when they travel the roads and lanes. - From Kuklos' 39 Articles

Jacomus

  • My favourite gender neutral pronoun is comrade
Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #61 on: November 07, 2012, 03:08:46 pm »
2 problems mentioned below have the same solution:

"Show me more!" -> "more what?"

"Make it bigger/larger!!!" -> "what is 'it' ?"

Or have I overcomplicated ...

See: Fuzzy's post re: 'Help Desk'  :)
"The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity." Amelia Earhart

tiermat

  • According to Jane, I'm a Unisex SpaceAdmin
Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #62 on: November 07, 2012, 03:12:14 pm »
The majority here seem to be pointing at users being the culprit, but IT people are just as bad, to wit:

Conversation had too many times by myself (other person speaking first)
"LDAP isn't working"
"How do you know?"
"Entrust is no longer issuing certificates"
"OK, so how is that LDAP's fault?"
"Well Entrust puts the certs into LDAP"
"Yes I know how the system hangs together, but how does what you are telling me mean that LDAP is broken?"
"Entrust has stopped working"
"Yes I know, but what is your proof that LDAP has caused it?"
"It's no longer issuing certificates and the last time this happened it was LDAP"
"That doesn't mean it is this time, lets work through this, have you tried connecting from the Entrust box to LDAP?"
"No"
"OK, go do that then come back and tell me LDAP isn't working"
...

9 time out of ten it is not UNDERSTANDING what is happening or how to test it that is the issue, not that X, Y or LDAP is broken...

My personal pet hate, as others have mentioned, though is "Ping" you an email, my usual reply is "I tried that and just got destination unreachable" or if I am feeling particularly mean, printing off the POP, IMAP and SMTP RFCs and asking them to explain where ICMP packets come into it.  Usually they just ask me to send them an email after that :)
I feel like Captain Kirk, on a brand new planet every day, a little like King Kong on top of the Empire State

Kim

  • Timelord
Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #63 on: November 07, 2012, 03:18:45 pm »
My personal pet hate, as others have mentioned, though is "Ping" you an email, my usual reply is "I tried that and just got destination unreachable" or if I am feeling particularly mean, printing off the POP, IMAP and SMTP RFCs and asking them to explain where ICMP packets come into it.  Usually they just ask me to send them an email after that :)


Quote from: ukcquotes
[shouting into the kitchen]
Ducttape: "Bill, could you ask Alex what he's cooking?"
Morti: "Alex! What're you cooking?"
Creature: "Spaghetti bolognese."
Ducttape: "Is it bean feast?"
Morti: "Is it bean feast?"
Morti: "Is it bean feast?"
Morti: "Is it bean feast?"
Morti: "Three packets transmitted, zero received, 100% packet loss."
Ducttape: "Alex! Could you come here please?"
Creature: "Yes?"
Ducttape: "Are you cooking bean feast?"
Creature: "Yes."
Ducttape (to Morti): "See, I used a connection based protocol..."
Careful, Kim. Your sarcasm's showing...

mcshroom

  • Mushroom
Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #64 on: November 07, 2012, 03:42:01 pm »

Quote from: ukcquotes
[shouting into the kitchen]
Ducttape: "Bill, could you ask Alex what he's cooking?"
Morti: "Alex! What're you cooking?"
Creature: "Spaghetti bolognese."
Ducttape: "Is it bean feast?"
Morti: "Is it bean feast?"
Morti: "Is it bean feast?"
Morti: "Is it bean feast?"
Morti: "Three packets transmitted, zero received, 100% packet loss."
Ducttape: "Alex! Could you come here please?"
Creature: "Yes?"
Ducttape: "Are you cooking bean feast?"
Creature: "Yes."
Ducttape (to Morti): "See, I used a connection based protocol..."

I think that goes in Colloquial food terms that annoy. Just because it has tomatoes and pasta in it something is not Bolognese. Benfeast 'Bolognese' doesn't even taste similar.
Climbs like a sprinter, sprints like a climber!

Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #65 on: November 07, 2012, 05:15:23 pm »
'Turn it on and off, that'll fix it'
A reboot is actually the opposite: turn it off and then back on. There are times when it is worth doing.

andygates

  • Peroxide Viking
Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #66 on: November 07, 2012, 06:47:01 pm »
It fixed a number of dodgy voting machines last night, for example.

It's surprisingly effective, which is why we tell you to do it.  :D
It takes blood and guts to be this cool but I'm still just a cliché.
OpenStreetMap UK & IRL Streetmap & Topo: ravenfamily.org/andyg/maps updates weekly.

Jacomus

  • My favourite gender neutral pronoun is comrade
Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #67 on: November 07, 2012, 07:35:22 pm »
'Turn it on and off, that'll fix it'
A reboot is actually the opposite: turn it off and then back on. There are times when it is worth doing.

It fixed a number of dodgy voting machines last night, for example.

It's surprisingly effective, which is why we tell you to do it.  :D

I seem to have been painted as a luser instead of a mere user... The reason it annoys me is not its simplicity, it is the back to front phraseology that is so often trotted out... I'm looking at you, Dell Helldesk.
"The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity." Amelia Earhart

tonycollinet

  • No Longer a western province of Númenor
Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #68 on: April 01, 2013, 01:53:11 pm »
It fixed a number of dodgy voting machines last night, for example.

It's surprisingly effective, which is why we tell you to do it.  :D

That is true - which is why it has already been done before I phone helpdesk. It annoys to be told to do it again anyway.

Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #69 on: April 01, 2013, 08:48:31 pm »
Arguably more engineering than IT, although you get active speakers.

M&S are currently driving me nuts with their "active waistbands" on mens' trousers that "adjust in size with you" or something. That's the definition of passive. They are passive waistbands; stop calling them active >:( >:( >:(

mattc

  • n.b. have grown beard since photo taken
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Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #70 on: April 01, 2013, 11:05:11 pm »
Bit scared you may shout at me .... in Comic Sans ... but:

I suspect they're 'active' in the sense of 'suitable for active wearers' i.e. walking about, not just sitting at a desk [this is as active as M&S customers get, you're not expected to climb Everest].

It's marketing speak - not something from a technical user manual!
Has never ridden RAAM
---------
No.11  Because of the great host of those who dislike the least appearance of "swank " when they travel the roads and lanes. - From Kuklos' 39 Articles

Feanor

  • It's mostly downhill from here.
Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #71 on: April 01, 2013, 11:13:48 pm »
The use of the word 'Download' for any computer activity.

"I downloaded excell and it crashed" ( I started up XL. ).
"I downloaded the game from the CD and ... " ( I installed the game... )
etc, etc.

Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #72 on: April 01, 2013, 11:18:44 pm »
Bit scared you may shout at me .... in Comic Sans ... but:

I suspect they're 'active' in the sense of 'suitable for active wearers' i.e. walking about, not just sitting at a desk [this is as active as M&S customers get, you're not expected to climb Everest].

It's marketing speak - not something from a technical user manual!

Nah, it's the waistband that's being called active, not the wearer. I suspect you're right; some marketing guy thinks it sounds good. Trouble is, using terms to mean their opposites makes them not that useful.

Still calls up visions for me of a waistband with pistons and a power-pack to change the sizing :o

Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #73 on: April 01, 2013, 11:19:59 pm »
I also hate the BBC's (and others') use of "...for more information, log on to our Web site", when logging on is precisely what you don't have to do.

Re: Colloquial Computer Terms That Annoy
« Reply #74 on: April 02, 2013, 12:23:51 pm »
There is no such word as "logon".

If there were, then the next page would say "you have successfully logonned" and the information page would say "take care when logoning".

The site in question can manage "log off" so why TF "logon"?
Quote from: tiermat
that's not science, it's semantics.