Author Topic: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG  (Read 64697 times)

Cudzoziemiec

  • Solar powered, tea fuelled cycle-wol
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #650 on: November 14, 2018, 10:05:09 am »
An ungovernable laughter, a joyous agitation which makes the summer stretching before you seem like an unrolling canvas on which you might draw those first rude pure strokes that are free. (Capote)

Cudzoziemiec

  • Solar powered, tea fuelled cycle-wol
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #651 on: November 14, 2018, 10:05:33 am »
BONG... Old man sits on bench with grandchildren BONG...
An ungovernable laughter, a joyous agitation which makes the summer stretching before you seem like an unrolling canvas on which you might draw those first rude pure strokes that are free. (Capote)

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #652 on: November 14, 2018, 10:42:02 am »
BONG... Woman opens Coca-Cola can BONG...

I guess it takes someone special to not know it was empty before opening it.
If you don't like your democracy, vote against it.

Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #653 on: November 14, 2018, 10:53:19 am »
Maybe she thought it was
"Yes please" said Squirrel "biscuits are our favourite things."

Torslanda

  • Professional Gobshite
  • Just a tart for retro kit . . .
    • John's Bikes
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #654 on: December 31, 2018, 06:02:54 pm »
Some people on the planet begin their day before the UK. Apparently it's already New Year. Yawn, yawn,yawn...
VELOMANCER

Well that's the more blunt way of putting it but as usual he's dead right.

Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #655 on: December 31, 2018, 06:58:14 pm »
Some people on the planet begin their day before the UK. Apparently it's already New Year. Yawn, yawn,yawn...
as of 18:30 more than 50% of the earths population had moved into 2019. Troo fax
Sorting my life out, one shed at a time.

Andrij

  • Андрій
  • Ερασιτεχνικός μισάνθρωπος
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #656 on: January 01, 2019, 09:09:27 am »
Some people on the planet begin their day before the UK. Apparently it's already New Year. Yawn, yawn,yawn...
as of 18:30 more than 50% of the earths population had moved into 2019. Troo fax

There's an xkcd for that...
;D  Andrij.  I pronounce you Complete and Utter GIT   :thumbsup:

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #657 on: January 01, 2019, 02:30:17 pm »
People swim outdoors on winter Bank Holidays.

[FAR too many instances for any URL]

Basil

  • Um....err......oh bugger!
  • Help me!
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #658 on: January 01, 2019, 04:27:24 pm »
Bong bong  bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong bong
Quote from: Kim
And remember that friends who organise things on Facebook aren't proper friends anyway.

mattc

  • n.b. have grown beard since photo taken
    • Didcot Audaxes
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #659 on: January 01, 2019, 07:03:33 pm »
Some people on the planet begin their day before the UK. Apparently it's already New Year. Yawn, yawn,yawn...

Now I must admit I do find that one slightly irksome! I think it's because the reports always make it sounds like the Kiwis (et al) have won some sort of race  :facepalm:

On the other hand:

People swim outdoors on winter Bank Holidays.

[FAR too many instances for any URL]
Now, I find coverage of winter swims quite entertaining - a worthy appearance in the "And finally ... " slots. Events don't need to surprise me to interest (or entertain me) :)

Where would you draw the line; not reporting elections where the strong favourite won?? :)
Has never ridden RAAM
---------
No.11  Because of the great host of those who dislike the least appearance of "swank " when they travel the roads and lanes. - From Kuklos' 39 Articles

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #660 on: January 01, 2019, 07:38:24 pm »
Dips in the sea and Serpentine happen EVERY year, as do A Level results.
Elections are a bit more unusual, even if predictable.

The sun rises every day.
The sun will rise on the summer solstice.
This event at Stonehenge will be 'news' again.

mattc

  • n.b. have grown beard since photo taken
    • Didcot Audaxes
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #661 on: January 02, 2019, 09:17:57 am »
If it's a slow news day, then I for one would appreciate a really good sunrise photo. :)

Just as I'm happy to see beautiful wildlife photos in a newspaper - they are NOTHING TO DO WITH NEWS, but they please me.

Perhaps the distinction is that they are fairly new photos - just as the pictures of icy swims should be from this year's dip!
Has never ridden RAAM
---------
No.11  Because of the great host of those who dislike the least appearance of "swank " when they travel the roads and lanes. - From Kuklos' 39 Articles

Kim

  • 2nd in the world
To ride the Windcheetah, first, you must embrace the cantilever...

Kim

  • 2nd in the world
To ride the Windcheetah, first, you must embrace the cantilever...

Torslanda

  • Professional Gobshite
  • Just a tart for retro kit . . .
    • John's Bikes
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #664 on: January 18, 2019, 01:53:34 pm »
I've got a huge bottle of soy sauce (1.5l IIRC).

Gonna drink it tonight and report back tomorrow... *
















*May contain traces of lie
VELOMANCER

Well that's the more blunt way of putting it but as usual he's dead right.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Solar powered, tea fuelled cycle-wol
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #665 on: January 18, 2019, 05:50:51 pm »
BONG... A place calling itself a massage parlour was actually a brothel... BONG

https://www.bristolpost.co.uk/news/butterflys-weston-brothel-madam-jailed-2444224
Including the classic line:
Quote
...the policemen made their excuses and left.
An ungovernable laughter, a joyous agitation which makes the summer stretching before you seem like an unrolling canvas on which you might draw those first rude pure strokes that are free. (Capote)

ian

  • fatuously disingenuous
    • The Suburban Survival Guide
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #666 on: January 18, 2019, 06:23:34 pm »
I've got a huge bottle of soy sauce (1.5l IIRC).

Gonna drink it tonight and report back tomorrow... *


I'll give you better odds of getting drunk than with Miller Genuine Draft.
!nataS pihsroW

Graeme

  • Priest, Preacher and Prophet
  • @FatherHilarious
    • BalancingOnTwoWheels
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #667 on: January 20, 2019, 12:27:03 pm »
BONG...

One of two people playing tennis lost to the other one.

https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/tennis/46937398

BONG.
37. Because travel is the finest educational system of all; and cycling the cheapest, easiest, and most educational means of travel - Kuklos' 39 Articles

mattc

  • n.b. have grown beard since photo taken
    • Didcot Audaxes
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #668 on: January 20, 2019, 01:34:35 pm »
Are you interested in tennis, Graeme? Or indeed other sport?
Has never ridden RAAM
---------
No.11  Because of the great host of those who dislike the least appearance of "swank " when they travel the roads and lanes. - From Kuklos' 39 Articles

Kim

  • 2nd in the world
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #669 on: January 20, 2019, 01:41:30 pm »
That one's an example of a story that's escaped from the sport section, hence qualifying for Not News status in the most boring way possible.  It's currently in 5th place on the BBC news home page between Prince Philip not wearing a seatbelt and a funeral for unknown Holocaust victims.
To ride the Windcheetah, first, you must embrace the cantilever...

mattc

  • n.b. have grown beard since photo taken
    • Didcot Audaxes
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #670 on: January 20, 2019, 01:47:00 pm »
Well Prince Philip not wearing a seatbelt is a proper Not News story!  Why wasn't I told about it in this thread?!?
Has never ridden RAAM
---------
No.11  Because of the great host of those who dislike the least appearance of "swank " when they travel the roads and lanes. - From Kuklos' 39 Articles

Cudzoziemiec

  • Solar powered, tea fuelled cycle-wol
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #671 on: January 20, 2019, 01:49:19 pm »
Never mind that, what about the occasions when Prince Philip was not not wearing a seatbelt!
An ungovernable laughter, a joyous agitation which makes the summer stretching before you seem like an unrolling canvas on which you might draw those first rude pure strokes that are free. (Capote)

mattc

  • n.b. have grown beard since photo taken
    • Didcot Audaxes
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #672 on: January 20, 2019, 01:51:23 pm »
Never mind that, what about the occasions when Prince Philip was not not wearing a seatbelt!
A clear opportunity for some stats and some info-graphics. Perhaps in the monday editions when the proper journalists are back on duty? We can but hope!
Has never ridden RAAM
---------
No.11  Because of the great host of those who dislike the least appearance of "swank " when they travel the roads and lanes. - From Kuklos' 39 Articles

Kim

  • 2nd in the world
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #673 on: January 20, 2019, 01:52:21 pm »
Never mind that, what about the occasions when Prince Philip was not not wearing a seatbelt!

I like to imagine those involved the Queen hooning around in a Landrover to practice for entertaining the Saudis.
To ride the Windcheetah, first, you must embrace the cantilever...

Cudzoziemiec

  • Solar powered, tea fuelled cycle-wol
Re: BONG ..And Here is the Not News..BONG
« Reply #674 on: January 20, 2019, 01:55:44 pm »
I think this needs a venn diagram to show, amongst other things, those instances when the Queen was not wearing a seatbelt and Prince Philip was not not wearing a seatbelt.
An ungovernable laughter, a joyous agitation which makes the summer stretching before you seem like an unrolling canvas on which you might draw those first rude pure strokes that are free. (Capote)