Author Topic: Poo sticks  (Read 8457 times)

Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #25 on: August 12, 2014, 12:36:13 pm »
I'm reliably told that kitchen roll or paper towels are the best being generally thicker and larger per sheet than bog roll making it easier to catch a log cleanly.


hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #26 on: August 12, 2014, 12:48:18 pm »
... this is just a routine test that is sent to everyone who reaches 60.

Aha, this is something to look forward to - and no, that wasn't said sarcastically. I lost a work colleague who, at the age of 54, died two weeks after stomach cancer was discovered and I hear or read of cancers being discovered in routine health checks. I have often wondered how one gets a routine health check as I haven't seen my GP in over 35 years.

So long as you are still registered with a UK GP at a UK address, it should be sent automagically.
Given you have been 'off scene' for a while, it might be wise to check you are still registered.

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #27 on: August 12, 2014, 12:53:04 pm »
The description makes riding the black lizard seem a doddle by comparison.
If you don't like your democracy, vote against it.

red marley

Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #28 on: August 12, 2014, 01:35:04 pm »
Maybe a pulp cardboard bedpan/bedpan liner, placed 'twixt WC pan and seat could catch the products efficiently.

Something like this http://www.amazon.co.uk/VERNACARE-BEDPAN-LINER-CASE-101AA100/dp/B00CESSBMK/ref=sr_1_7?ie=UTF8&qid=1407843785&sr=8-7&keywords=bedpan+liner

A keen forumenger could buy 100 use a few, then pass the pack on to the next in need.

Roger - could you organise some YACF branded ones with various colour options?

Wowbagger

  • Dez's butler
    • Musings of a Gentleman Cyclist
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #29 on: August 12, 2014, 03:05:07 pm »
Another 'line' of this bowel screening was to offer flexible sigmoidoscopy to everyone from some, but not all, General Practices in our area at 55.
I had this last year and needed a follow-up colonoscopy.
I have had the 'all-clear' after this and need nothing else till I get Wow's poo sticks in 4 years' time.
My friend, who is local and the same age, was not offered this.
Shame. Her first husband died of bowel cancer.
I suggested she request screening; she works in healthcare.

Would you like me to store them for 4 years or send them now?
Oh, Bach without any doubt. Bach every time for me.

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #30 on: August 12, 2014, 03:35:38 pm »
Another 'line' of this bowel screening was to offer flexible sigmoidoscopy to everyone from some, but not all, General Practices in our area at 55.
I had this last year and needed a follow-up colonoscopy.
I have had the 'all-clear' after this and need nothing else till I get Wow's poo sticks in 4 years' time.
My friend, who is local and the same age, was not offered this.
Shame. Her first husband died of bowel cancer.
I suggested she request screening; she works in healthcare.

Would you like me to store them for 4 years or send them now?

I leave the decision to an older, wiser man... ;D ;D ;D

Wowbagger

  • Dez's butler
    • Musings of a Gentleman Cyclist
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #31 on: August 12, 2014, 03:56:48 pm »
Another 'line' of this bowel screening was to offer flexible sigmoidoscopy to everyone from some, but not all, General Practices in our area at 55.
I had this last year and needed a follow-up colonoscopy.
I have had the 'all-clear' after this and need nothing else till I get Wow's poo sticks in 4 years' time.
My friend, who is local and the same age, was not offered this.
Shame. Her first husband died of bowel cancer.
I suggested she request screening; she works in healthcare.

Would you like me to store them for 4 years or send them now?

I leave the decision to an older, wiser man... ;D ;D ;D

Who's that then?  ???
Oh, Bach without any doubt. Bach every time for me.

Basil

  • Um....err......oh bugger!
  • Help me!
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #32 on: August 13, 2014, 08:39:57 pm »
I finally got my response letter today. I have to admit that I was beginning to get a little concerned (as you do).  Normally, the response is pretty quick, so waiting nearly two weeks had me thinking things like, "Oh god, they've found something, I've been passed to another department and I'll be getting a letter from them"
I opened the letter tonight.  My first thought was, "Oh no, it's too long, a whole page of stuff.  That's got to be bad news"

Basically it said, "Dear Basil, thank you for some most delightful poo.  All clear".
Then several paragraphs of blah, blah, blah.

 :thumbsup:
Quote from: Kim
And remember that friends who organise things on Facebook aren't proper friends anyway.

Wowbagger

  • Dez's butler
    • Musings of a Gentleman Cyclist
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #33 on: August 14, 2014, 12:59:08 am »
Excellent news, Basil. I am sure your poo is a joy to behold.
Oh, Bach without any doubt. Bach every time for me.

Wowbagger

  • Dez's butler
    • Musings of a Gentleman Cyclist
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #34 on: August 14, 2014, 09:43:54 am »
I have finished my smearing and the little bit of card is in its PBP (Poo By Post) envelope and is ready to go. I'm rather glad to get that over with, to be honest.
Oh, Bach without any doubt. Bach every time for me.

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #35 on: August 14, 2014, 10:38:53 am »
The emotion of a motion in motion...

Wowbagger

  • Dez's butler
    • Musings of a Gentleman Cyclist
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #36 on: August 14, 2014, 12:04:14 pm »
I was discussing this procedure with family members. My brother tells me that his dear wife cannot steel herself to play with her own turds and so has not partaken in the screening. I emailed my younger daughter, who knows a lot about cancer as it's her job to do so, and she quite sensibly pointed out that getting bowel cancer would involve a lot more horrid yuk than just catching a few turds ever couple of years, would no doubt hurt a lot and could well prove fatal, so nipping it in the bud must be a good idea.

So, folks, Take Care of your Turds!
Oh, Bach without any doubt. Bach every time for me.

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #37 on: August 14, 2014, 01:23:54 pm »
If you are offered a flexible sigmoidoscopy at 55, go for that too.
The preparatory enema is 'just one of those things'  and not painful.
The scoping itself is a tad painful in parts but bearable.
They found and removed a polyp in my case, then referred me for a colonoscopy.
Colonoscopy preparation is tedious; 4 days on a low-res diet was dull and I really missed my 5-a-day (usually more like 8 in my case).
I had the colonoscopy using Entonox as I really didn't want sedation. Some parts were momentarily hurty.
I was given the all clear; they even saw my appendix!

A while later, a taxi driver told me how he had lost his 17-year-old son to bowel cancer.

Caught early, bowel growths are easily treatable.
Caught too late its poo bags
or curtains.

Wowbagger

  • Dez's butler
    • Musings of a Gentleman Cyclist
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #38 on: August 14, 2014, 01:53:55 pm »
I can't do that without a tardis!

Had a conversation with younger daughter today - she works for Cancer Research UK. She was telling me that bowel cancer is the third biggest killer in the UK, after breast and lung. From what I understand the polyps take about 50* years to develop and if you have the flexible sigmoidoscopy at 55 any they find will be removed and you won't need it done again. CRUK are currently pressurising the government to introduce these tests a a matter of course, to be followed up with the sort of test that I have done this week. It is estimated that incidences of bowel cancer will be reduced by 50% if FS becomes universal.

*I think this may be wrong and a result of me mishearing her - she was speaking to me from Melbourne. I think 15 is more likely.
Oh, Bach without any doubt. Bach every time for me.

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #39 on: August 14, 2014, 01:58:24 pm »
I wasn't suggesting a time machine for you, Wow!
I was trying to encourage our younger brethren to accept and participate in any screening offered for all the reasons you outline.

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #40 on: August 14, 2014, 02:01:46 pm »
The frequency depends on your pathology. I get to ride the black lizard every two years, on account of my condition.
If you don't like your democracy, vote against it.

frankly frankie

  • I kid you not
    • Fuchsiaphile
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #41 on: August 14, 2014, 02:22:50 pm »
I have finished my smearing and the little bit of card is in its PBP (Poo By Post) envelope and is ready to go.

Make sure you address it to Helly.  And put a 2nd-class stamp on, that way it really might take 4 years to get to her.
"This is a complex subject, with a need for more than one highlighter pen."

Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #42 on: August 14, 2014, 03:27:41 pm »
When the pilot for the Bowel Cancer Screening system was being run it wasn't unheard of for the labs, instead of a sealed sample card, to receive a jiffy bag containing a complete poo.

That made for an unhappy postman.

MikeFromLFE

  • Previously known as Millimole
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #43 on: August 14, 2014, 04:25:03 pm »
I've looked at shit through a microscope.  It's a lot less exciting that you might expect.

Having looked at a shit load of it in my career - on bits of cardboard, in plastic bottles, in blenders, dried under IR lamps, and stirred up with ether - its actually incredibly boring.
Although if you do want some light reading I refer you to The Bristol Stool Scale (yes, Bristol) :  http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bristol_stool_scale
Too many angry people - breathe & relax.

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #44 on: August 14, 2014, 09:42:38 pm »
I'm sure the Bristol Chart has been discussed elsewhere within yacf.

Wowbagger

  • Dez's butler
    • Musings of a Gentleman Cyclist
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #45 on: August 14, 2014, 11:08:47 pm »
It has indeed, more frequently that the King's Lynn Gonad Shield.
Oh, Bach without any doubt. Bach every time for me.

Wowbagger

  • Dez's butler
    • Musings of a Gentleman Cyclist
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #46 on: August 24, 2014, 11:45:00 pm »
I have received a letter to tell me that my turds are normal and that should be it for a couple of years.
Oh, Bach without any doubt. Bach every time for me.

Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #47 on: September 02, 2014, 04:11:50 pm »
Good Ho! Wowwers.  I have been doing this for a few years now and it is not pleasant.  I never dismiss it since my sister had bowel cancer several years ago, and I am happy to say, is still with us. However, spare a thought for the poor old postie.  He must know what he is collecting from the post box. 
Cancer changes your outlook on life. Change yours before it changes you.

Basil

  • Um....err......oh bugger!
  • Help me!
Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #48 on: June 06, 2016, 04:39:32 pm »
Mrs. B received her first ever poo sticks envelope last week.  I notice that it is still sitting on the sideboard.   I hope I'm not going to have to encourage her.  Particularly in view of today being the day my brother starts his chemo.
Quote from: Kim
And remember that friends who organise things on Facebook aren't proper friends anyway.

Re: Poo sticks
« Reply #49 on: June 06, 2016, 08:47:59 pm »
I have had a rather nice PM from a concerned forummer, whom I have assured that this is just a routine test that is sent to everyone who reaches 60.

I will probably give it a go in the morning. You will be relieved to hear that TT will remain WP.
These screening tests start at age 50 in Scotland