Author Topic: You know you're middle aged when  (Read 84196 times)

T42

  • Tea tank
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1075 on: October 28, 2019, 08:42:07 am »
Continuing my camera theme, perhaps to confirm middle-age: at an extended family get-together today my mother-in-law takes a photo, sighs loudly and says, "What a pity, that's the last one; we'll have to buy a new film."

Four-seasons films, our old village photographer used to call them.  Back when we collected cameras we'd often get one with a film in it - the last the previous owner had taken before dying.
I've dusted all those old bottles and set them up straight.

ian

  • fatuously disingenuous
    • The Suburban Survival Guide
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1076 on: October 28, 2019, 09:30:25 am »
I remember that my first digital camera was a Kodak. Took, I think, 600x400 protographs.

I can't say I've used a non-phone digital camera in a decade, there's a Panasonic Lumix and a Canon Powershot in the cupboard.
!nataS pihsroW

Kim

  • Timelord
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1077 on: October 29, 2019, 11:31:59 pm »
You discover that Young People have adopted one of your family neologisms[1], and given it a completely different meaning[2].


[1] Dench v. To damage through careless bashing or scraping.
[2] https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Dench
Careful, Kim. Your sarcasm's showing...

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1078 on: October 30, 2019, 08:34:28 am »
I'm glad someone else did that Wirth tinned soup.

There I was getting ready for Brexit on Tuesday and when I got home I discovered I was missing the tenth tin of soup and the discount  >:(

yes, I think that was you, upthread

Ah yes! I wondered why I had 18 tins of soup...  ;D
If you don't like your democracy, vote against it.

T42

  • Tea tank
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1079 on: October 30, 2019, 08:45:18 am »
You discover that Young People have adopted one of your family neologisms[1], and given it a completely different meaning[2].


[1] Dench v. To damage through careless bashing or scraping.
[2] https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Dench


Even worse when you find that an everyday expression of your youth has taken on utterly filthy connotations.
I've dusted all those old bottles and set them up straight.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Dormant but requires tea
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1080 on: October 30, 2019, 08:59:28 am »
Urban Dictionary implies dench came from Judi, whereas the young persons say it came from hench, a contraction of henchman, used by muscled bodybuilders.
At some point in the ride, you might find yourself in Osaka with Spanish speakers where you had expected Edinburgh talking Greek. This does not mean you are lost, or even off route.

Ruthie

  • Her Majester
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1081 on: October 30, 2019, 09:24:31 pm »
 ... you can finally stop pretending you enjoy clubbing.

Nightclubbing.  Not seal clubbing.  Never done that.

Don't like golf clubbing either.
Milk please, no sugar.

Kim

  • Timelord
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1082 on: October 30, 2019, 10:09:37 pm »
I've been not enjoying clubbing since I was about 16, never saw the need to pretend.  I was already deeply uncool for eschewing drinkohol, so didn't really have anything to prove.

Straight clubs: Terrible music, smoking, too loud to hear - let alone think, obnoxious drunk men, people who are on drugs, homophobic bouncers.
Gay clubs: Cheesy music, even more smoking, too loud to hear - let alone think, scary gropy women, people who think you're on drugs, slightly less homophobic[1] bouncers.
Golf clubs: Ballsport for Scots and rich people.  What's the point when they don't even have a windmill?
Seal clubbing I leave to the mathematicians[2].

 :hand:

If I'm going to damage my lungs/cochlea, I'd rather go to a gig, where at least the music stands a chance of being decent.


ETA: I've just realised all my nightclub (and indeed golf club) experience predates the smoking ban.  I think the last time was when Hanananananah The Astronononononomer was DJing, which was a fantastic night out with above-average music, that culminated in a large dose of prednisolone.   :facepalm:


[1] IIRC when I was a PSO the Stupid Union famously had to pass a motion threatening not to renew Right Wing Security's contract if they kept refusing people access to the gay night for looking a bit quiltbaggy, and then renewed it anyway.  Because Canterbury really is that shit.
[2] In-joke too obscure to be worth explaining.
Careful, Kim. Your sarcasm's showing...

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1083 on: October 30, 2019, 10:29:14 pm »
[Not really middle-aged any more]

Sister (younger than me) sadly announced death of a former classmate on Facebook.

I think she would have turned 60 today.  :'(

ian

  • fatuously disingenuous
    • The Suburban Survival Guide
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1084 on: October 31, 2019, 09:52:11 am »
Clubs mostly existed to clobber your inhibitions senseless so you could attempt to meet the sort of sexual partners you'd probably regret meeting the following morning. Sometimes you'd even go out a couple of times, slowly realising that really all you had in common was mutual incomprehension and a biological urge. That was a good outcome*. Mostly you'd go home and eat chips with your similarly unsuccessful flatmates.

Actually, it was good fun. I used to love it. I remember we used to go to a place called Macmillans in Liverpool. Sweat would drip from the ceilings and you had to dance to prevent your feet becoming permanent bonded to the floor. It was £5, if I recall, and they'd serve vodka and tizer. There were nights at the student union, of course, though we used to go downmarket to the poly on account we thought the women were more attractive there (I'm not sure they were, but for the same reason we'd always go the humanities library**, better scenery***) and also that they'd be more liberal with their attentions (in my experience, no).

I think my most recent clubbing experience landed us in a former-bank basement in Philadelphia (the place we were supposed to go was closing, so this was Uber-driver roulette) a few years back. We only got in because my colleague loudly and poshly declared 'but we're British!' (you have to have ID, it's the US of course). I think we were twenty years older than every other customer. We were drunk enough for it to be fun. It was mostly an interesting anthropological experience that I'm not keen to repeat.


*well, many people seem to get married with less in common.
**children, ask your parents. A large building with books in it. Actual books.
***sorry, but this is how men of a certain age (anywhere between 11 and 85) think. Women, I suspect, too.
!nataS pihsroW

Cudzoziemiec

  • Dormant but requires tea
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1085 on: October 31, 2019, 10:00:16 am »
This has prompted me to dig out the T-shirt I "won" in Crystal nightclub, Apia, in 1996. Says nightclub on the T-shirt but more of a disco in a village hall really. Lots of cheesy polynesian pop and a "raffle" in which, by some amazing coincidence, all the tourists won T-shirts and all the other prizes (cigarettes and alcohol, and no they didn't, in fact they probably didn't even know it) went to locals. Music and dancing are fun if you can escape the pressure to be cool stuff.
At some point in the ride, you might find yourself in Osaka with Spanish speakers where you had expected Edinburgh talking Greek. This does not mean you are lost, or even off route.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Dormant but requires tea
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1086 on: October 31, 2019, 10:05:35 am »
For my 60th birthday I'm going to grow a long blond ponytail, squeeze myself into a leopard skin suit, or failing that a YACF jersey, and go out on the town. For extra points I'll insist that the DJ (do they still have human DJs? Will they then? Won't it all be robots?) play something by Rod Stewart.
At some point in the ride, you might find yourself in Osaka with Spanish speakers where you had expected Edinburgh talking Greek. This does not mean you are lost, or even off route.

Torslanda

  • Professional Gobshite
  • Just a tart for retro kit . . .
    • John's Bikes
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1087 on: October 31, 2019, 05:57:52 pm »
You wouldn't suggest that if you had SEEN THIS
VELOMANCER

Well that's the more blunt way of putting it but as usual he's dead right.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Dormant but requires tea
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1088 on: October 31, 2019, 06:02:09 pm »
That's exactly what I have seen!
At some point in the ride, you might find yourself in Osaka with Spanish speakers where you had expected Edinburgh talking Greek. This does not mean you are lost, or even off route.

spesh

  • It's starting to look a lot like Cthulhumas!
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1089 on: October 31, 2019, 06:03:40 pm »
"Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And when you look long into an abyss, the abyss also looks into you." ~ Friedrich Nietzsche

Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1090 on: October 31, 2019, 06:12:43 pm »
I remember we used to go to a place called Macmillans in Liverpool. Sweat would drip from the ceilings and you had to dance to prevent your feet becoming permanent bonded to the floor. It was £5, if I recall, and they'd serve vodka and tizer.



Sounds like most of the better Liverpool clubs.  I was a regular at The Cabin, which was basically a private club for nurses from every hospital in Liverpool, somehow I blagged a membership from Brian, the grumpy bloke who owned it & used to give lollipops to everyone as they left.  The Casa on Hope St & Razz on Fleet St were good as well. 
Not fast & rarely furious

tweeting occasional in(s)anities as andrewxclark

Tim Hall

  • I want to eat the fleeting shade of your lashes
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1091 on: November 01, 2019, 11:43:13 am »
As noted upthread, my colleagues are mostly Young People.  I made a passing reference to Minder and Arthur Daley, which was met with blank looks.

They only understood it when I linked Terry McCann to Denis Waterman to Little Britain.
There are two ways you can get exercise out of a bicycle: you can
"overhaul" it, or you can ride it.  (Jerome K Jerome)

Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1092 on: November 01, 2019, 11:57:02 am »
As noted upthread, my colleagues are mostly Young People.  I made a passing reference to Minder and Arthur Daley, which was met with blank looks.

They only understood it when I linked Terry McCann to Denis Waterman to Little Britain.
Apropos of nothing in particular, when I worked at the Science Museum, our workshop was located in what was known as Hut K.
In a previous life, when Thames Television occupied Blythe House in West London, Hut K was Arthur Daley's lock up.
We had a photo of him hanging on the wall.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Dormant but requires tea
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1093 on: November 02, 2019, 10:15:05 am »
You know you're middle aged when you're a swing voter, according to the La Guardian.
At some point in the ride, you might find yourself in Osaka with Spanish speakers where you had expected Edinburgh talking Greek. This does not mean you are lost, or even off route.

Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1094 on: November 02, 2019, 05:49:38 pm »
I used to enjoy clubs, but carefully vetted for music and decent people. So maybe a bit like gigs. The Banshee in Manchester put its entrance up to 1p while I lived there. I met my wife in a nightclub too. Though the incomprehension Ian mentions creeps in occasionally.

I went to a club in London a year or two back, to see Kieran Hebden DJ. It was good fun, though I did feel a bit old and needed my bed by 2am, though the rest were still going strong. So maybe middle age is creeping up on me.

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1095 on: November 02, 2019, 06:32:01 pm »
You know you're middle aged when you're a swing voter, according to the La Guardian.

Does that mean more involvement than car keys in the bowl?
If you don't like your democracy, vote against it.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Dormant but requires tea
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1096 on: November 09, 2019, 03:35:29 pm »
When you're riding along and start whistling/humming a childhood tune to yourself but suddenly stop because you remember it's now musica non grata, to coin a phrase.
(click to show/hide)
And this ties in with the current OK Boomer meme. There was a Rolf Harris Christmas album, made sometime in the 70s, which included this song, surprisingly still found on YouTube:
https://youtu.be/hlSsffF2xhA

Apparently a boomer is a type of kangaroo.

Edit: But if you are a boomer of the non-kangaroo sort, you probably aren't really middle aged...
At some point in the ride, you might find yourself in Osaka with Spanish speakers where you had expected Edinburgh talking Greek. This does not mean you are lost, or even off route.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Dormant but requires tea
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1097 on: November 21, 2019, 03:49:47 pm »
...when a name you and your friends made up for a laugh at school is now a real name of a real, famous – okay, known to a niche – person.
https://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/gallery/2019/nov/21/portraits-salon-des-refuses-rejected-taylor-wessing-prize-in-pictures

It's Jimothy. I do like the double pun of Ché-Loui.
At some point in the ride, you might find yourself in Osaka with Spanish speakers where you had expected Edinburgh talking Greek. This does not mean you are lost, or even off route.

T42

  • Tea tank
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1098 on: November 21, 2019, 04:20:59 pm »
1. When you make a noise like Monica Selles hitting a ball every time you get up.

2. When you know what Monica Selles sounded like.
I've dusted all those old bottles and set them up straight.

Auntie Helen

  • 6 Wheels in Germany
Re: You know you're middle aged when
« Reply #1099 on: November 21, 2019, 04:23:39 pm »
1. When you make a noise like Monica Selles hitting a ball every time you get up.

2. When you know what Monica Selles sounded like.
3. When you know how Monica Seles spelled her surname  ;)
My blog on cycling in Germany and eating German cake – http://www.auntiehelen.co.uk