Author Topic: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread  (Read 98103 times)

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #1325 on: March 12, 2019, 09:56:08 am »
Put the bins out last night in the usual spot next to the drive.

Gosh, it's windy isn't it? I know, I'll place this brick on the lid to weigh it down.

1am - I am woken by a clatter and bang. I pull the curtain to see the bin has fallen over by the car. After a moment, I decide to get up and tidy it up as I didn't want a fox or cat getting at it and have my rubbish decorating the cul-de-sac.

Get out there in my jimjams (it's raining too!) and notice that my ingenious bin tie-down device had been flung from the bin as it fell, hitting my car on the front wing.

A nice dent and scratch.

I'm such a fecking div!

Mr Larrington

  • A bit ov a lyv wyr by slof standirds
  • Custard Wallah
    • Mr Larrington's Automatic Diary
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #1326 on: March 12, 2019, 11:25:00 am »
Quote from: Angry People In Local Newspapers
BINNNNNSSSSSS!!!!
External Transparent Wall Inspection Operative & Mayor of Mortagne-au-Perche
Satisfying the Bloodlust of the Masses in Peacetime

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #1327 on: March 13, 2019, 09:52:43 am »
Tomorrow I'm not working, so this morning when I woke to the alarm, I turned it off. Then with some joy reset it to a later time for tomorrow. At 7:30 I got a text from my wife about the "bloody alarm"...   :-[ ::-)
We are making a New World (Paul Nash, 1918)

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #1328 on: March 15, 2019, 05:29:18 pm »
Yesterday I didn't leap out of bed (still recovering from D&V, virus-induced). I got up, had a shower, dressed, battled the gale and rain to the train station and went to work.

Nothing terribly divvish about that, you might say.

Oh, but there is, because when I left the house, I shut the bedroom door. And when I shut the bedroom door, I didn't look under the bed. If I had looked under the bed (rather than glancing round the room), I would have seen the cat.

Therefore preventing myself from getting home last night, opening the bedroom door to be greeted by a cat and a stench of cat piss. Emanating from the bed. Rather than piss on the floor, the cat had chosen to piss on the duvet (comprehensively, through it, soaking the duvet, sheet, mattress padding and mattress.

So I spent last night washing bedding, scrubbing mattress, and sleeping in freezing cold room (windows open to help room dry out and dispel the smell).
<i>Marmite slave</i>

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #1329 on: March 16, 2019, 09:33:19 am »
Scrabbling round to find my wallet this morning.
Looked in all the usual places.
Nothing.
Oh! Those trousers on the clothes horse?
The ones which had a 40°C wash last night.

Money laundering.
Again  ::-)

T42

  • Gaulois réfractaire
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #1330 on: March 17, 2019, 02:50:51 pm »
Having retaped the Trek's bars I searched the workshop for 10 minutes for the Bontrager buttbar plug I must have flicked off the bench when removing the old tape. Then found it still in the bar end. ;D

ETA: Also, broke a piece of the bar-end fixing of my Zefal mirror, ordered a new one then managed to fit the old one. Well, it's a bit scratched.
Tout à gauche sur le plat

Kim

  • 2nd in the world
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #1331 on: March 19, 2019, 12:38:51 am »
Following on from https://yacf.co.uk/forum/index.php?topic=10706.msg2379046#msg2379046 I've just spent a couple of hours wanking about in re-learning gnuplot, because spreadsheets are universally awful (and infuriatingly slow) at graphing large datasets.

Having achieved a beautiful plot of my non-compliant electricity supply in a perfectly good postscript file (for ease of throwing at Ye Olde Laserjet), I had a go at generating a SVG for general showing-off purposes.  Unfortunately, it had passed midnight and, in a moment of filetype aphasia, I generated an empty CSV file over the top of my source data.  For maximum divvishness I'd also over-enthusiastically tidied up the multimeter's SD card while I had it in the computer, so that was my only copy.

Sometimes the universe has a way of telling you to go to bed.
To ride the Windcheetah, first, you must embrace the cantilever...

T42

  • Gaulois réfractaire
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #1332 on: March 19, 2019, 08:54:03 am »
Without any supper at that.
Tout à gauche sur le plat

Cudzoziemiec

  • Solar powered, tea fuelled cycle-wol
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #1333 on: March 19, 2019, 10:03:28 am »
Scrabbling round to find my wallet this morning.
Looked in all the usual places.
Nothing.
Oh! Those trousers on the clothes horse?
The ones which had a 40°C wash last night.

Money laundering.
Again  ::-)
You need some antimony!
(see Grammar thread)
The earth is vast and beautiful and contains many miraculous places. (Chekhov)

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #1334 on: March 21, 2019, 03:49:26 pm »
So last week I organised a set of training for today, back in my base office. Nicely booked the meeting and meeting room in the outlook calendar as is the normal practice for my client location.....


and completely forgot that meeting rooms in my home office have to be booked through reception  :facepalm:


Arrived at work this morning to a worried receptionist as my presenter had arrived mentioned the meeting room but it had been booked for someone else. Further there were no available meeting rooms in the entire building. We ended up meeting in one of the breakout areas into which the facilities team deployed one of the plasma screens to display everything.