Author Topic: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread  (Read 104104 times)

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #775 on: April 09, 2018, 07:28:58 pm »
My medicule training tells me inhaled peanuts can be NARSTY cos Harmful Oils.

Hope you've coughed this bugger up properly!

citoyen

  • Cat 6 Racer
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #776 on: April 10, 2018, 08:04:42 am »
Added a set of crosstop levers to the fixed. Before connecting up the cables, I took it for a test ride to check I was happy with the position of the levers.

When I later came to connect up the cables, I discovered that the cable clamp bolts, both front and rear, had worked themselves loose and fallen out somewhere during my test ride...

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #777 on: April 10, 2018, 03:42:27 pm »
Phoned surgery to complain that the doctor has failed to keep a telephone appt for the third time. Receptionist suggests she phones back to check she can get through as I may have call blocking activated. I give her rather a dusty reply then huffily hang up. Seconds later my phone lights up with a call that's been diverted straight to voicemail. It is, of course, from the surgery.  :facepalm:

Call blocking eh? That's a handy feature I didn't even know existed (except I must have, otherwise how did it get turned on?).
Hear all, see all, say nowt

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #778 on: April 10, 2018, 03:46:42 pm »
I think some phones have phone blocking as well as some telco 'features'.

Better check my 1572...

Vince

  • Can't climb; won't climb
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #779 on: April 13, 2018, 04:41:12 pm »
I booked my car in for its MOT. 15 minutes after I get home, the garage calls.
"Your car isn't due to be MOT'd until the end of next month. Come and collect it please."
216km from Marsh Gibbon

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #780 on: April 14, 2018, 06:29:36 am »
Last year I bought 3 travel padlocks for securing luggage. 4 digit combination locks.


Can’t remember what I set them to & the one on this overnight bag is shut  :facepalm:
Not fast & rarely furious

tweeting occasional in(s)anities as andrewxclark

Torslanda

  • Professional Gobshite
  • Just a tart for retro kit . . .
    • John's Bikes
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #781 on: April 14, 2018, 08:44:13 am »
Oh well. It's only 10,000 possibilities...
VELOMANCER

Well that's the more blunt way of putting it but as usual he's dead right.

T42

  • Gaulois réfractaire
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #782 on: April 14, 2018, 10:04:50 am »
9998, assuming it's not 0000 or 1234.
Où sont les merguez d'antan ?

woollypigs

  • Mr Peli
    • woollypigs
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #783 on: April 14, 2018, 10:07:17 am »
1111?

Wowbagger

  • Dez's butler
    • Musings of a Gentleman Cyclist
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #784 on: April 14, 2018, 10:15:26 am »
Last year I bought 3 travel padlocks for securing luggage. 4 digit combination locks.


Can’t remember what I set them to & the one on this overnight bag is shut  :facepalm:

I bought a cheap combination bike lock a few years back and was randomly fiddling with it. I had unwittingly set it to a random number and locked it.

I was surprised how quickly I found the correct number - it was only about 20 minutes. Mind you, I had selected something beginning with 1. That cut it down a bit.
Oh, Bach without any doubt. Bach every time for me.

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #785 on: April 14, 2018, 10:18:45 am »
None of the usual combinations of birthdays or phone numbers work. Of course it’s something so simple & unforgettable I’ve not written it down  :facepalm:
Not fast & rarely furious

tweeting occasional in(s)anities as andrewxclark

woollypigs

  • Mr Peli
    • woollypigs
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #786 on: April 14, 2018, 11:16:20 am »
1984?

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #787 on: April 14, 2018, 11:34:48 am »
Have you tried the PIN for you ATM bank card?

Mr Larrington

  • A bit ov a lyv wyr by slof standirds
  • Custard Wallah
    • Mr Larrington's Automatic Diary
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #788 on: April 14, 2018, 02:36:33 pm »
Ten point to Helly for not suggesting the PIN number for andrewc's ATM machine card :demon:
External Transparent Wall Inspection Operative & Mayor of Mortagne-au-Perche
Satisfying the Bloodlust of the Masses in Peacetime

Kim

  • 2nd in the world
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #789 on: April 14, 2018, 07:53:32 pm »
Ob-Spaceballs:

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/3KMNFNk_hvQ&rel=1" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/v/3KMNFNk_hvQ&rel=1</a>
https://youtu.be/3KMNFNk_hvQ?t=40s
To ride the Windcheetah, first, you must embrace the cantilever...

Mrs Pingu

  • Who ate all the pies? Me
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Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #790 on: April 19, 2018, 09:30:56 pm »
As mentioned in other threads, I bought a pair of new calipers for my BB7 discs which arrived today so this evening I decided to swap over the rear one which is the knackered one.
So I hoofed off the old caliper, bunged on the new, only to find that once I'd got the thing bolted to the frame I couldn't do the other nuts up and the disc was jammed in the slot.

Fuuuuuck! I thought.  I've never gone and bought for the wrong disc size, have I? I was sure I'd done it all correct.
I sat for a bit comparing the size and design of the old caliper with the 2nd new one. Nope, they are exactly the same size, what the hell is going on?
Well, bugger, I'll just have to put the old one back on if I want to ride to work tomorrow.
I unbolt the new one and then finally realise my mistake. I've put the front caliper on the rear and I couldn't see why it was wrong because I was comparing the old caliper with the remaining new one, which was of course the correct one! Once I put it on...

What a nugget.  :facepalm:  :-[

Still, at least I got to do it all sitting in the sun.  :thumbsup:
Do not clench. It only makes it worse.

Torslanda

  • Professional Gobshite
  • Just a tart for retro kit . . .
    • John's Bikes
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #791 on: April 19, 2018, 09:39:08 pm »
It's been a long day!
VELOMANCER

Well that's the more blunt way of putting it but as usual he's dead right.

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #792 on: April 20, 2018, 11:12:56 am »
Mending a door handle using box of old parts. I needed to cut the bar, that joins the two handles together, to fit.

Have it in the vice, attacking it with the junior hacksaw. It required a fair amount of welly, must have been hardened steel or something, getting about 80% through and thought "This'll give any second n........" BLAM! Final bit sheers, sending my ungloved thumb directly into the freshy cut, hot metal stub.

My testes receded into my body, sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. i inspected the wound. Deep, grey wound. "Oh, it's not even bleedi........" Wave of pain, profuse bleeding ensues. I went through several dressings before it started to gum up giving me ample time to think "I'm such a fecking div!"

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #793 on: April 20, 2018, 07:59:54 pm »
I managed to run myself over with the car.  I can attest to the perfect F/R weight distribution of an MX-5, since it definitely felt like 275kg on my (slippered) foot.  This isn't the first time, either.  I don't recomnend it but it doesn't seem to do any damage.
Never tell me the odds.

Torslanda

  • Professional Gobshite
  • Just a tart for retro kit . . .
    • John's Bikes
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #794 on: April 21, 2018, 01:19:37 am »
You've been auditioning for Monty Python's 'Upper Class Twit of the Year'!  :o :o :o
VELOMANCER

Well that's the more blunt way of putting it but as usual he's dead right.

Andrij

  • Андрій
  • Ερασιτεχνικός μισάνθρωπος
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #795 on: April 21, 2018, 09:23:19 am »
You've been auditioning for Monty Python's 'Upper Class Twit of the Year'!  :o :o :o

Though now he could probably qualify for a job at the Ministry of Silly Walks.
;D  Andrij.  I pronounce you Complete and Utter GIT   :thumbsup:

SoreTween

  • Most of me survived the Pennine Bridleway.
Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #796 on: April 21, 2018, 10:55:41 am »
When packing to return home from Italy in a concious effort to distribute the weight as my hold bag was likely to be overweight I put 4 full size bottles of bathroom liquids in my carry on.  Two were unopened.  Cue looking like that idiot at the scanners.  It's not like I was even in a total trance or drunk, several other items I was careful to put in the hold bag mindful of exactly the same rule set.
2019 targets: TINAT 160 rough
There is only one infinite resource in this universe; human stupidity.

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #797 on: April 23, 2018, 08:30:45 am »
Mending a door handle using box of old parts. I needed to cut the bar, that joins the two handles together, to fit.

Have it in the vice, attacking it with the junior hacksaw. It required a fair amount of welly, must have been hardened steel or something, getting about 80% through and thought "This'll give any second n........" BLAM! Final bit sheers, sending my ungloved thumb directly into the freshy cut, hot metal stub.

My testes receded into my body, sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. i inspected the wound. Deep, grey wound. "Oh, it's not even bleedi........" Wave of pain, profuse bleeding ensues. I went through several dressings before it started to gum up giving me ample time to think "I'm such a fecking div!"

Ouch, mend soon!  I got that feeling when I had a contretemps with my hedge-cutters a while back...

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #798 on: April 23, 2018, 09:54:12 am »
I'd designed the steelwork for one of our major projects on the basis of the floors being precast hollowcore concrete 'plank' units.  Turns out I was wrong to assume that; the architect wanted a composite floor, which significantly changes the structure.  Oh well, it's only a couple of days' work down the swanny...  >:(

Re: The "I'm Such a Fecking Div" Thread
« Reply #799 on: April 25, 2018, 08:35:03 am »
On the way out the door this morning, glanced at the table and thought 'What's that pile of clothes?', figured it out when I got out the shower at work  :facepalm: