Old wives' tales

[woollypigs]

Well we have arrived back in the UK for sure now. Both knocked out for six and generally feeling shite. Just been to the drug store to get some modern day chemicals to fight what ever bugs are running wild within us. Five days for me, normally just out for two days, and Peli started suffering yesterday badly.

While there I was thinking about old wife's tales, I can only remember a few, what others are there?

For chesty coughs apply mustard onto your chest.

If you are suffering with small cold, get a coffee mug put a small silver coin (like a 5p) in it, pour strong coffee in until you can't see the coin. Then get snaps (or vodka) pour in until you can see the coin again. OK the level of the visibility of the coin is in the eye of the beholder and tend to be rather clear after two or three cups of this mixture But it should get rid of any colds you have, hic.

[geraldc]

booze is a pain killer, and it also appears in a lot of cough medicine.

[mrcharly-YHT]

If you feed a cold, you will have to starve a fever.

[Regulator]

If you feed a cold, you will have to starve a fever.

The 'feed a cold, starve a fever' maxim may have some clinical basis.

[Tigerrr]

Beestings work as well as viagra if applied to the member involved.

[Wowbagger]

Beestings work as well as viagra if applied to the member involved.

Take away the pain and leave the swelling.

[Mrs Pingu]

We were sharing a table with a chef in a German pub one night, and he reckoned you should eat a whole raw chilli!

[noisycrank]

booze is a pain killer, and it also appears in a lot of cough medicine.

Gripe water has a higher alcohol content than sherry.

[pdm]

booze is a pain killer, and it also appears in a lot of cough medicine.

Gripe water has a higher alcohol content than sherry.

Not any more. The alcohol was apparently removed from the formula in the 1980's some time between the griping episodes my eldest (when it worked) and second (when it didn't) daughter... 

[simonp]

We were sharing a table with a chef in a German pub one night, and he reckoned you should eat a whole raw chilli!

That all? I had several in my lunch. I don't even have a cold.

[Ian H]

I tend to suspicion about all over-the-counter remedies: cough medicines, cold reliefs and the like. In fact I'd say that 99.9% of the stock of any high street chemist is somewhere on the line between unecessary, and useless quackery.

[MattH]

We were sharing a table with a chef in a German pub one night, and he reckoned you should eat a whole raw chilli!

That all? I had several in my lunch. I don't even have a cold.

Perhaps that's why you don't have a cold 

[hellymedic]

I tend to suspicion about all over-the-counter remedies: cough medicines, cold reliefs and the like. In fact I'd say that 99.9% of the stock of any high street chemist is somewhere on the line between unecessary, and useless quackery.

Much represents a tax on the gullible, agreed.
A few pence spent on vitamin I is not wasted.

Pharmacies gain little if David or I catch colds. Sainsbury's does better as they sell the tissues, lemon juice and honey. These supply comfort, not cure...

[robbo6]

For piles, chop a horseradish coarsely and soak it in a strong solution of saltpetre overnight, next morning drain it and allow to dry completely in an airing cupboard or over a low heat. Meanwhile obtain a steel bucket and cut a hole in the bottom, taking care to remove all sharp edges. When the horseradish is dry place it in a heap on  a concrete or stone surface and light it, making sure it only smoulders, it is important that there is no visible flame, when it is smoking strongly, place the previously prepared bucket over it (inverted) and having arranged one's clothing to expose the affected part, sit on the bucket so as to allow the smoke access to the haemorrhoids. Repeat twice daily for a week.

[Ian H]

For piles, chop a horseradish coarsely and soak it in a strong solution of saltpetre overnight, next morning drain it and allow to dry completely in an airing cupboard or over a low heat. Meanwhile obtain a steel bucket and cut a hole in the bottom, taking care to remove all sharp edges. When the horseradish is dry place it in a heap on  a concrete or stone surface and light it, making sure it only smoulders, it is important that there is no visible flame, when it is smoking strongly, place the previously prepared bucket over it (inverted) and having arranged one's clothing to expose the affected part, sit on the bucket so as to allow the smoke access to the haemorrhoids. Repeat twice daily for a week.

I'm sure this is available in kit form from Boots.

[border-rider]

It sounds like a great way to take your mind off the problem 

[giropaul]

I tend to suspicion about all over-the-counter remedies: cough medicines, cold reliefs and the like. In fact I'd say that 99.9% of the stock of any high street chemist is somewhere on the line between unecessary, and useless quackery.

I'm of the view that anything that doesn't have to be asked for and doesn't merit a "xxx" by the person serving you to the Pharmacist is a waste of money.

I find it strange that people who (potentially of course) sell one drugs that do have an effect  can end up in prison, whilst those who sell you "drugs" with little or no effect end up knighted and/or megarich.

[rogerzilla]

Turning your shoes upside down before bedtime will prevent night cramps.

It's not clear whether the shoes in question should be the ones you were wearing during the cramp-inducing activity or the ones you would expect to wear most often, but I can report that this one really does work.  Presumably there is a placebo effect because your brain registers that it has "done something" to address the problem.

[Kim]

I tend to suspicion about all over-the-counter remedies: cough medicines, cold reliefs and the like. In fact I'd say that 99.9% of the stock of any high street chemist is somewhere on the line between unecessary, and useless quackery.

I'd certainly agree that the vast majority are just overpriced foul-tasting (and often caffeinated) variations on a handful of potentially useful generic drugs which can be found on the next shelf down in an easy-to-swallow-and-get-it-over-with form for less than a quid.

The commercial success of name brand paracetamol/ibuprofen/cetirizine and the like can only be a direct result of people not bothering to read the packets.  

Lemsip is of course an exception to this rule.  As well as providing an annoying non-standard dose of paracetamol, it serves to mask the taste of the yellow snow.

[The Mechanic]

My Mum used to say that, if you sit on a cold stone floor you will get piles.

She also used to say that if you sit on a hot radiator you will get piles.

I used to wonder if everyone had piles.

[Quisling]

My Mum used to say that, if you sit on a cold stone floor you will get piles.

She also used to say that if you sit on a hot radiator you will get piles.

I used to wonder if everyone had piles.

Just your mum by the sounds of it