Another bizarre Amazon CD review

[rogerzilla]

5.0 out of 5 stars  Toni Basil is the Goddess of Music, December 20, 2004
By    Johny Bottom "Insane and lonely guitarist" (Jacksonville, NC) - See all my reviews
(TOP 500 REVIEWER)   
First of all Toni Basil belongs to the ages. Through the miracle of digitally recorded music, Toni Basil will live forever. We can only thank her parents for conceiving such a beautiful and talanted child. What we have here is a musical triumph, not just for Toni Basil, but for humankind. If only more artists would use her as an oasis of knowledge and advice. Toni Basil sits on top of Music's Mountain and all we can do is climb as high as we can to reach her, but we never will.

The album starts off with 'Nobody'. This synth-pop delight will fill your soul and put your mind at ease. It's a great intro to what awaits you as you begin this musical journy.

The next song 'Hanging Around'. Toni again dazzles her listeners with so much vocal talant, you wouold think she was an immortal from Mount Olympus rather than just flesh and blood. She is so gifted I shudder to think where music would be today if not for her.

Another great song is 'Time After Time'. DOn't confuse this with the song of the same name by Miss Cindi Lauper. No no, this song eats the other song for breakfast. Toni Basil is the shining light for humanity and you will only come to understand your own life and existance after listening to her 'Time after Time'.

I will now talk about the greatest song ever written by anyone, anywhere. That's right everyone, the legendery 'Mickey'. I'm shocked that it's still not on the charts. This song was a number one smash hit and I've have never since heard a song worthy enough to take over it's number one spot. This song has everything; love, devotion, appreciation. You can just hear Toni's begging, pleading voice as she tears her heart out for her beloved Mickey. This is without a doubt the greatest human achievement. Better than landing a man on the moon, better than the Great Pyramids, better than Da Vinci's 'Last Supper'. The song Mickey is the reason the entire human race was allowed to exist. We can only regard ourselves as fortunate enough to be living in Toni Basil's lifetime. Imagine all the people since the dawn of time who never got to hear this! Attila the Hun, Marie Antoinette, Robert E. Lee, Warran G. Harding, Pontious Pilate, Blackbeard, Elizabeth Bathory. The list goes on and on for eternity. I was just trying to make my point. Perhaps the world would have been toytally different and history would have been for the better if Mickey had been known in Mesopotamia where the birth of civilization began. Shame. But there is hope for the future. Countless generations who follow after us will hear it. That is why I can sleep at night.

I could go on forever about Toni Basil. But I am unfortunatly limited in the my words. I would just like to end with 'Space Girls'. It is another favorite of mine and it gives me a snug warm feeling.

Toni Basil's music is the loving breast that I cling and suckle to.

[Julian]

I have never heard of Toni Basil, but I would be reluctant to buy a CD recommended by this gibbering obsessive.

[rogerzilla]

Also from his reviews:

      
Live in Berlin
DVD ~ Roger Whittaker
Price: $12.99
Availability: Not in stock; order now and we'll deliver when available
      
5 used & new from $9.70

     
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars $12.99?? This is an outrage!!, March 27, 2008
I just bought this item for $25.00 and told the cashier to keep the change. I refuse to buy the splender and galantry that is Roger Whittaker for anything less than a twenty and a five.

To see this great singer perform "Last Farewell' is the closest thing to the opening of the Gates of Heaven that these mortal eyes will ever see. How can you not fall to your knees and raise your arms in splendor as he sets sail for certain death and faces down the smoking cannons?

I used to be a punk rocker addicted to the Sex Pistols, but after shoplifting a Roger Whittaker tape as a joke, I realized how useless my life was. Roger is 200 years old and still performing while Sid Vicious died at 21 and could not even play his bass. The answer is obvious, the strong and talented survive. I have burned all my Sex Pistols shirts and now sport a denim jacket with a Roger Whittaker backpatch sewed on for all the world to see.

Roger Whittaker rules!

He buys a bit of BDSM gear too...

[hubner]

Is this the Toni Basil who who took her clothes off in "Easy Rider"?

[mark]

Is this the Toni Basil who who took her clothes off in "Easy Rider"?

Seems to be.

If I were her, I would be very worried by this review.

[Rob S]

Can't beat the Jordan and Peter Andre album's reviews......'it cured my cancer' etc etc!!

[TimO]

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/ULk30EEMIY4&rel=1" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/v/ULk30EEMIY4&rel=1</a> was one of the great cheesie hits of 1982!

Someone gave me a Best of Tony Basil album some years ago (I repeat, someone else gave it to me as a joke, I didn't buy it!), and I don't think I'd ever heard anything on it other than Mickey.  The spanish version of Mickey was amusing though!

[Rhys W]

Mickey was one of the great cheesie hits of 1982!

I was 15 in 1982. Toni Basil was dressed as a cheerleader.   

[rogerzilla]

Younger readers will only remember the almost-identical cover version by "Lolly", who managed to trump Toni Basil by having several hits.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anna_Kumble

I think the dolphin comment is a bit of Wikiterrorism.

[Eccentrica Gallumbits]

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/ULk30EEMIY4&rel=1" target="_blank">http://www.youtube.com/v/ULk30EEMIY4&rel=1</a> was one of the great cheesie hits of 1982!

Someone gave me a Best of Tony Basil album some years ago (I repeat, someone else gave it to me as a joke, I didn't buy it!), and I don't think I'd ever heard anything on it other than Mickey.  The spanish version of Mickey was amusing though!

Someone gave me a copy of it too. I have no idea where it is now, which is strange because I'm sure I would never throw it out. Hey Mickey!

I love reading Amazon reviews of utter shite. The ones of Jordan and Peter Andre's album were the best thing I've ever read. Reading them would have cured my cancer if I'd had it, in the same way the album healed so many.

[D0m1n1c Burford]

5.0 out of 5 stars  Toni Basil is the Goddess of Music, December 20, 2004
By    Johny Bottom "Insane and lonely guitarist" (Jacksonville, NC) - See all my reviews
(TOP 500 REVIEWER)   
First of all Toni Basil belongs to the ages. Through the miracle of digitally recorded music, Toni Basil will live forever. We can only thank her parents for conceiving such a beautiful and talanted child. What we have here is a musical triumph, not just for Toni Basil, but for humankind. If only more artists would use her as an oasis of knowledge and advice. Toni Basil sits on top of Music's Mountain and all we can do is climb as high as we can to reach her, but we never will.

The album starts off with 'Nobody'. This synth-pop delight will fill your soul and put your mind at ease. It's a great intro to what awaits you as you begin this musical journy.

The next song 'Hanging Around'. Toni again dazzles her listeners with so much vocal talant, you wouold think she was an immortal from Mount Olympus rather than just flesh and blood. She is so gifted I shudder to think where music would be today if not for her.

Another great song is 'Time After Time'. DOn't confuse this with the song of the same name by Miss Cindi Lauper. No no, this song eats the other song for breakfast. Toni Basil is the shining light for humanity and you will only come to understand your own life and existance after listening to her 'Time after Time'.

I will now talk about the greatest song ever written by anyone, anywhere. That's right everyone, the legendery 'Mickey'. I'm shocked that it's still not on the charts. This song was a number one smash hit and I've have never since heard a song worthy enough to take over it's number one spot. This song has everything; love, devotion, appreciation. You can just hear Toni's begging, pleading voice as she tears her heart out for her beloved Mickey. This is without a doubt the greatest human achievement. Better than landing a man on the moon, better than the Great Pyramids, better than Da Vinci's 'Last Supper'. The song Mickey is the reason the entire human race was allowed to exist. We can only regard ourselves as fortunate enough to be living in Toni Basil's lifetime. Imagine all the people since the dawn of time who never got to hear this! Attila the Hun, Marie Antoinette, Robert E. Lee, Warran G. Harding, Pontious Pilate, Blackbeard, Elizabeth Bathory. The list goes on and on for eternity. I was just trying to make my point. Perhaps the world would have been toytally different and history would have been for the better if Mickey had been known in Mesopotamia where the birth of civilization began. Shame. But there is hope for the future. Countless generations who follow after us will hear it. That is why I can sleep at night.

I could go on forever about Toni Basil. But I am unfortunatly limited in the my words. I would just like to end with 'Space Girls'. It is another favorite of mine and it gives me a snug warm feeling.

Toni Basil's music is the loving breast that I cling and suckle to.

This has gotta be a p*ss take 

[mattc]

Younger readers will only remember the almost-identical cover version by "Lolly", who managed to trump Toni Basil by having several hits.

Lolly (singer) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

I think the dolphin comment is a bit of Wikiterrorism.

I'm trying to resist clicking on that - just imagining all the possible "dolphin comments" is too much fun!

I have never heard of Toni Basil, but I would be reluctant to buy a CD recommended by this gibbering obsessive.

I am 99.9% sure that this review is indeed a piss-take: HOWEVER, Mickey really is up there in the All -Time top-10 of pure pop songs. Download it to your Sony Walkman now, young lady.

Edit: It's only just dawned on me that a recent (somewhat raunchy) cheerleader-themed Gwen Stefani video owed more than a little to the (pretty innocent) video for Mickey.

Liz - have you heard of Gwen Stefani?

[Mr Larrington]

Younger readers will only remember the almost-identical cover version by "Lolly", who managed to trump Toni Basil by having several hits.

Lolly (singer) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

I think the dolphin comment is a bit of Wikiterrorism.

I'm trying to resist clicking on that - just imagining all the possible "dolphin comments" is too much fun!

(Clicks)

The dolphin comment ("Anna has also been spotted eating dolphins in Wigan.") has been removed, but apparently "In March 2008, she will be singing 'My Fake Leg' in Belfast."