Author Topic: The RANT thread (often contains fruity language) (Read 2995587 times)

Clare · « **Reply #14525 on:** 01 November, 2012, 12:26:32 pm »

Please, just for one day SHUT THE FUCK UP.

Andrij · « **Reply #14526 on:** 01 November, 2012, 12:50:48 pm »

Quote from: Clare on 01 November, 2012, 12:26:32 pm

Please, just for one day SHUT THE FUCK UP.

I knew the twin sisters who sit behind me were loud, but didn't realise that you could hear them down your way.

madcow · « **Reply #14527 on:** 01 November, 2012, 03:56:47 pm »

"December 24th is a normal working day, therefore we will be working up to Christmas Eve." Miserable bastards.

Polar Bear · « **Reply #14528 on:** 01 November, 2012, 03:58:35 pm »

Feel lucky to have a job my friend. I presume you have leave that you can take?

iddu · « **Reply #14529 on:** 01 November, 2012, 06:28:15 pm »

Quote from: madcow on 01 November, 2012, 03:56:47 pm

"December 24th is a normal working day, therefore we will be working up to Christmas Eve." Miserable bastards.

Semantics are your friend. http://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/british/christmas-eve

madcow · « **Reply #14530 on:** 01 November, 2012, 07:51:35 pm »

Yes agreed on all points but this is a business selling to businesses , whose personnel will all have buggered off on the preceeding Friday.
Just typical of the humourless company that it is.

mattc · « **Reply #14531 on:** 01 November, 2012, 08:06:17 pm »

IME for similar companies, that means
"OFFICIALLY you're working that day. If your line managers realise there is nothing important to do, you can slope off when you get the wink. Which might be on the 23rd."

Eccentrica Gallumbits · « **Reply #14532 on:** 02 November, 2012, 07:32:22 am »

If people don't stop posting Skyfall spoilers on facebook, I will go all SMERSH on their asses.

Chris S · « **Reply #14533 on:** 02 November, 2012, 10:12:54 am »

OK, which one of you invented JSON? Hmm? You must be seeing a whole team of therapists.

And what, pray was wrong with xml? Why not use that? Oh no - lets invent a whole other arcane, impenetrable syntax that requires entire libraries of code to unpack and interpret.

And while we're about it - now that you've invented it - JSON is a text stream, right? So why is it so fucking hard to get text out, hmm? Text is all it is - it's nothing but text. So when I want a value to a data item, WHY CAN'T I GET IT OUT AS TEXT?

(sigh)

Is the pub open yet?

Chris S · « **Reply #14534 on:** 02 November, 2012, 10:16:39 am »

And another ~~thing~~ two things. Windows 8.

Firstly - this is a PC, not a fucking phone. Enough with the phone UI, ok? That's fine for a phone. This is not a phone.

Secondly. This message: "Windows protected your PC. Windows SmartScreen prevented an unrecognized [sic] app from starting..." Fuck Off. I recognize [sic] it - I FUCKING WROTE IT. Now let me run my app.

Jaded · « **Reply #14535 on:** 02 November, 2012, 10:21:08 am »

Had a (brief) look at Windows 8 yesterday.

Clicked on the 'Cup' Icon - it led to a set of nice coloured blocks indicating news highlights. Plus a message indicating I was not connected to the internet.

No clue at all as to how to get back to the original screen. No normal key presses worked, neither did clicking, double clicking, swiping or saying "this is a load of cock".

So my brief introduction to Windows 8 ended there.

padbeat · « **Reply #14536 on:** 02 November, 2012, 10:43:42 am »

Quote from: Chris S on 02 November, 2012, 10:12:54 am

OK, which one of you invented JSON? Hmm? You must be seeing a whole team of therapists.

And what, pray was wrong with xml? Why not use that? Oh no - lets invent a whole other arcane, impenetrable syntax that requires entire libraries of code to unpack and interpret.

And while we're about it - now that you've invented it - JSON is a text stream, right? So why is it so fucking hard to get text out, hmm? Text is all it is - it's nothing but text. So when I want a value to a data item, WHY CAN'T I GET IT OUT AS TEXT?

(sigh)

Is the pub open yet?

Standards

Karla · « **Reply #14537 on:** 02 November, 2012, 10:46:50 am »

Miles away? Well yes I was, once I'd emergency stopped in a parking space and you'd revved off into the distance.

Hey look, this is my fenix on turbo, can you see that? So what's with trying to pull out on my front wheel?

Oh, which taxi company was this? Ah yes, 659. Every fucking time.

rusky · « **Reply #14538 on:** 02 November, 2012, 12:47:43 pm »

I know I'm good at DIY & lateral thinking but shipping bunk beds without instructions is pushing it a little.

L CC · « **Reply #14539 on:** 02 November, 2012, 01:32:36 pm »

Quote from: madcow on 01 November, 2012, 03:56:47 pm

"December 24th is a normal working day, therefore we will be working up to Christmas Eve." Miserable bastards.

Construction industry. 2 week shut down. Christmas Bonus of a months pay.

(Last year I didn't have a job. This year I'm smug. Slings and arrows, and all that)

Notsototalnewbie · « **Reply #14540 on:** 02 November, 2012, 02:06:46 pm »

Quote from: Regulator on 01 November, 2012, 08:11:48 am

Quote from: Notsototalnewbie on 31 October, 2012, 11:32:07 am
Quote from: ian on 30 October, 2012, 05:14:49 pm
Well, I'm hoping this strain is not that contagious.

Well, Rob seems to have escaped whatever I had entirely despite spending the entire weekend looking after me in a cramped studio flat, and none of my colleagues seem to have suffered either despite sharing an open-plan office, so there’s hope. The fact that it wasn’t a sneezy/coughy/spluttery one probably helps with that.

Are you sure it was flu/a cold? Did you have a fever? If not...

Do you have a gas fire or use gas for cooking? Have you got a carbon monoxide monitor? The symptoms of carbon monoxide poisoning are often mistaken for flu.

I was shivering violently while feeling hot to the touch, so I assume fever. It disappeared very quickly though. I’ve got a carbon monoxide detector in the kitchen, where the boiler and gas cooker are, so I doubt it was that, but I’ll test it this evening just in case.

Ooh I’ve just remembered – my weird fleeting illness was the weekend of the Inquiry on The Thick of It and I watched it before I fell asleep and then woke up in the middle of the night firmly believing I was part of the coalition as depicted in TTOI. I think I had a temperature….

Wowbagger · « **Reply #14541 on:** 02 November, 2012, 04:31:43 pm »

Still this.

Ow!

pcolbeck · « **Reply #14542 on:** 02 November, 2012, 04:49:31 pm »

Just been informed that I have to go on a 5 day course to learn about a product the manufacturer has announced that they have ceased development on and are pulling out of that market. Plus I have to pass an exam on it. What a complete waste of time and money. Nearly as bad as the five day course and exam I did at IBM on their routers only to be rung as I walked out of IBM Southbank clutching my shiny new certificate to be told that they had sold the entire networking division to Cisco who were closing it down with immediate effect (Cisco just wanted the patents on some of the technology).

Bledlow · « **Reply #14543 on:** 02 November, 2012, 05:50:10 pm »

Why do you have to do this course? Can't you just say 'No thanks, it's obsolete'?

Feanor · « **Reply #14544 on:** 02 November, 2012, 10:58:43 pm »

Dear Junior, and School Sports Coach:

Please to be providing PROPER locations to away-game fixtures where I need to deposit sprogs at 0830 tomorrow morning?

A paper slip that says '3rd Nov Away Aberdeen Grammar' is spectacularly FUCKING USELESS.

The school in question has no grounds at the actual school, and several dotted around the countryside.

pcolbeck · « **Reply #14545 on:** 03 November, 2012, 04:23:33 pm »

Quote from: Bledlow on 02 November, 2012, 05:50:10 pm

Why do you have to do this course? Can't you just say 'No thanks, it's obsolete'?

Because to get a discount on buying the manufacturers kit you have to have people who have passed certain courses. A percent discount here and there means you either win or loose deals and makes a huge difference when you are turning over £50 mllion plus of that manufacturers kit. Basically the training requirements haven't caught up with the reality of the product line as yet.

Jaded · « **Reply #14546 on:** 06 November, 2012, 10:41:58 am »

Man on bus currently in Renfrew street, with me on it.

You have the most annoying laugh of 2012. Officially.

Mrs Pingu · « **Reply #14547 on:** 06 November, 2012, 12:46:42 pm »

Dear IT bods,

It has now been 8 days since all my Word and Excel macros stopped working and then you effed up my Outlook as well. I effectively have a very expensive internet browser.
This is seriously cramping my style, I can't sodding well do anything so for the love of dog get your finger out!

rogerzilla · « **Reply #14548 on:** 06 November, 2012, 01:43:50 pm »

T Mobile. Your 3G network sucks. Except in Swindon bus station, where it's ace. But I don't want to hang with tramps all day.

Peter · « **Reply #14549 on:** 06 November, 2012, 01:46:01 pm »

Roger, don't be nervous; I'm sure you'll blend in fine.