A random thread for small things that don't really warrant a thread of their own

[delthebike]

I just completed a mock LGV theory test, without any prep or training, and passed with 91% and in less than a fifth of the allotted time. 

[T42]

Including the question "When you are loading your lorry and a parcel is marked 'Fragile', should you hurl it (1) hard or (2) very hard, and how many times should you drop it first"?

[Tim Hall]

Wandering around xkcd, I came across this:

[woollypigs]

But where's my flying car

[Andrij]

But where's my flying car

'People' can't properly manage vehicles in two dimension.  I'd hate to imagine the carnage if we added a third!

[PeteB99]

But where's my flying car

It's called a helicopter.

[ian]

The future is really predicated on the social acceptability of tight lurex*.

In other news from the future, British Gas are supposed to come around to upgrade my heating thermostat to those internets. Not exactly temperature-raising excitement, I know (a pity given my remote command centre is currently hovering around 17.7 degrees). If they come, I've not had a reminder and my first attempt to book this involved an appointment slot that didn't exist, and just glancing at the BG website to pay my bill says I have an appointment to service my heating... I'm not entirely optimistic about this future. If they do come, it'll probably be while I'm on the toilet. The existential peril of the singular homeworker.

*I crashed headlong into my teenage years in the company of Colonel Wilma Deering...

[Cudzoziemiec]

Sure, but we have now walked on the moon (as well as moonwalked) and landed spaceships to other planets, as well as hurled them out across the galaxy.

[Torslanda]

But where's my flying car

It's called a helicopter.

Ah. If you want one of those just buy a field - and wait . . .

[PeteB99]

But where's my flying car

It's called a helicopter.

Ah. If you want one of those just buy a field - and wait . . .

Yebbut They're delivered in terrible condition. Even worse than DPD.

[ian]

Hitting the 4-h point of my six-hour BG appointment window. Tensions are rising in The Asbestos Palace. Even a bathroom visit (what my American colleagues have now started to call a 'bio-break') didn't conjure an engineer on the driveway. Optimism levels currently hover at 47%. There's something about appointments with any organization with the word 'British' in the name.

I'd do some work but the mothership SSO to our products that I need to access had opted to do a wobbly. Loading. Redirecting. Loading. Redirecting. Loading. Redirecting.

Oh well, I suppose I can answer some emails like a proper little office worker.

[ian]

I did trigger a visitation.

All went super until he left of course and I noticed the thermostat was sitting there 're-connecting...' which it continue to do until about 30 minutes ago when we both decided that a connection wasn't about to be made.

You know I posted about 'man-instructions', the cursed devices that can only have been designed by a man because simple functions involve holding buttons for periods of time until lights flash, and then additional sequences of presses and flashes, because putting a fucking button on the box that does this would be too fucking simple.

It's one of those.

So I followed the instructions and yay, the thermostat works.

But now the bloody thing is 'offline.'

I suppose I'll go and do it all again, I fear I didn't obtain the required number of amber flashes last time, so focused was I on the pink.

Oh and you get to hold two buttons on the thermostat while inserting the batteries, which might be easy if you're a squid.

[Cudzoziemiec]

Residual pirates on the forum might be interested to know that 300 years ago today Blackbeard died.

[ian]

I decided the best way to deal with man-design was man-mode. Toss the instructions away in disgust and press buttons in random sequences, occasionally pausing to swear. Then switch it all off. Then back on. And repeat.

On and amber vs. green, it doesn't help that I can't tell the difference. Is it flashing green or amber? I don't know.

I can't recount the steps but it seems to be working. Honestly, I was expecting it all to be a lot easier. I was probably expecting the engineer to finish the bloody job.

I think I'll break out the gin a day early. Victory over electronica is always something to be celebrated.

[matthew]

I got called a MAMIL when I got to work! Man in lycra I accept but middle aged!

[Pedaldog.]

I was in (Day) surgery yesterday. Had 3 Needles in my forehead, 1 in each side of my head at the temples, 2 on each side of my neck and one in each shoulder.
I had them in an effort to REDUCE pain!   They hurt a lot.

[T42]

That's how they punish unbelievers.

[Wombat]

I was in (Day) surgery yesterday. Had 3 Needles in my forehead, 1 in each side of my head at the temples, 2 on each side of my neck and one in each shoulder.
I had them in an effort to REDUCE pain!   They hurt a lot.

Ugh, needles in the head is just horrible!

When my hair was falling out prematurely, the NHS decided that they should stick needles in my head (apparently this was some sort of fertiliser, to make the stuff grow, a bloody silly idea if I ever heard one).  I was sat on a trolley thing, they fired this thing into my head, which was both bloody painful, and just a sickening feeling, and my muttered words were "I'm going" because I couldn't manage anything else.  The nurse said "what?" as I rolled off the trolley, onto the floor, unconscious.

Needles(s) to say, I decided that the treatment was far worse than the condition, as well as being a waste of NHS resources, so decline further efforts.  I shaved the remains off, which soon stopped growing anyway.

[rogerzilla]

My black Campag cap finally has a broken peak.  Caps with unbroken peaks are Not Cool.

[Beardy]

I might be less happy in the morning!

[lou boutin]

I was in (Day) surgery yesterday. Had 3 Needles in my forehead, 1 in each side of my head at the temples, 2 on each side of my neck and one in each shoulder.
I had them in an effort to REDUCE pain!   They hurt a lot.

I hope that it helps.  I hate needles.  A friend of mine has to regularly have needles into her back to reduce pain - they hurt but make an immense difference in the long run.  I do hope this is the case for you too.

[barakta]

The migraine lot want to stab me with needles (botulinum toxin) and I've got a hip joint steroid injection in 3 weeks. I am lucky as long as they don't go near my veins I'm fine...

Hope the pain is better by now Pedaldog, I know a few people who've had various pain stuff like that and found it does help after a few days of horridness.

[Cudzoziemiec]

Yesterday was 1st December and I heard Slade. Being played from a decorated steam train with santa costumes and elves. The rest of you can relax and skip straight to Boxing Day.

[andrewc]

Happy Anniversary to me!   I signed my life away to BT on 2nd December 1985.  I've still got my original paper contract in a folder in my desk.   On Friday they sent me an email asking if I'd like to leave with the inducement of approx 11 months wages...

[Beardy]

Happy Anniversary to me!   I signed my life away to BT on 2nd December 1985.  I've still got my original paper contract in a folder in my desk.   On Friday they sent me an email asking if I'd like to leave with the inducement of approx 11 months wages...

Is that a management grade offer Andrew, or are they now targeting ‘team members’ now as well?