Author Topic: Little Eye On The Provinces  (Read 154322 times)

Cudzoziemiec

  • Waking up now, put the kettle on!
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #2075 on: December 30, 2019, 06:55:04 pm »
Wasn't on a street though, private car park. Probably just some sort of ANPR-triggered thingy.
I do not ride a great big Mercian, gangster tanwalls, fixed cog in the back.

orraloon

  • I'm trying Ringo, I'm trying real hard
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #2076 on: December 30, 2019, 07:10:01 pm »
23:55 - 00:29 GMT.  I may be out of touch wiv da modern wurrlldd innit, but parking fees at midnight?

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #2077 on: December 30, 2019, 07:42:01 pm »
All year round, in many places.
If you don't like your democracy, vote against it.

Not fast & rarely furious

tweeting occasional in(s)anities as andrewxclark

Kim

  • Timelord
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #2079 on: January 08, 2020, 06:33:27 pm »
Thuggish swans.

Geese with white privilege and good PR
Careful, Kim. Your sarcasm's showing...

hellymedic

  • Just do it!

ian

  • fatuously disingenuous
    • The Suburban Survival Guide
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #2081 on: January 09, 2020, 05:29:59 pm »
As students, we lived around the corner from a Dolland & Aitchinson opticians. One evening, after a few drinks, we conspired in a plan to liberate the owl that graced their frontage. So we'd borrowed a ladder from Norm the Mildly Psychotic Milkman's yard (not Norman the Gangster, that's another Norm, and we wouldn't touch his ladder). Midway through said liberation, who should turn up, why yes, if isn't PCs Meddlesome and Spoiler and their insistence that the owl not be liberated.

One stern telling off later we snuck back and took the owl. Be free my little plastic friend. Actually, it was quite big.

The next morning as we swept away hangovers and commonsense dawned, we noted that (a) the owl was now in a primely incriminating position on the sofa and not above D&A and (b) we'd given our actual address to PC Meddlesome. Figuring that it was only a matter of time, we scurried into action, grabbing a spade from Norm the Mildly Psychotic Milkman's yard (he had everything back there), and using that to lever up a paving stone from the scrubby little patio behind our house and make a owl-shaped hole.

So there lies the D&A owl, buried under a Liverpool patio. Never dig up a patio in Liverpool is probably good advice.

If the stature of limitations doesn't apply, this is just a story I made up, OK, and I didn't know anyone involved. Owl, what owl? The police never did turn up.
!nataS pihsroW

Cudzoziemiec

  • Waking up now, put the kettle on!
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #2082 on: January 09, 2020, 07:19:45 pm »
What should really worry you is what else the owl might contain that could now be pinned on you...
I do not ride a great big Mercian, gangster tanwalls, fixed cog in the back.

Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #2083 on: January 09, 2020, 10:51:28 pm »
At the college where I did my Foundation Course we had a second-hand coffin in the locker room.
Two of us "found" it in an  undertaker's yard one lunchtime, and decided that it would be a grand addition to the college's furniture.

I can't  1; understand how we managed to do it in broad daylight
            2; understand how we got away with it
            3; remember what happened to it

Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #2084 on: January 10, 2020, 01:29:27 pm »
https://www.devonlive.com/news/devon-news/meet-devon-woman-whose-knees-3720388 ... look like EastEnders hard men Grant & Phil Mitchell.

I have added the remainer of the headline to the url so you don't have to click on it to get the gist of the story. But you'd be missing out on photos of a) the Mitchell brothers and b) knees (confusingly, they've not been captioned so it's your guess as to which is which), a video, and some cracking quotes. Ah, gwan, here's one :'People started asking Holly about her unusual skill, prompting her to "get the Mitchells out".'


Wowbagger

  • Dez's butler
    • Musings of a Gentleman Cyclist
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #2085 on: January 10, 2020, 09:02:32 pm »
At the college where I did my Foundation Course we had a second-hand coffin in the locker room.
Two of us "found" it in an  undertaker's yard one lunchtime, and decided that it would be a grand addition to the college's furniture.

I can't  1; understand how we managed to do it in broad daylight
            2; understand how we got away with it
            3; remember what happened to it

A coffin appeared in the yard behind my accommodation when I was at college. So far as I am aware it was never occupied. One morning, at about 2 o'clock, a small group of us processed up the Breck Road in Poulton-le-Fylde and place said coffin on top of a table-style gravestone.
Oh, Bach without any doubt. Bach every time for me.

Steph

  • Fast. Fast and bulbous. But fluffy.
Mae angen arnaf i byw, a fe fydda'i


Cudzoziemiec

  • Waking up now, put the kettle on!
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #2088 on: January 15, 2020, 03:02:51 pm »
Grimsby terror threat due to direct trains from London.

https://twitter.com/search?q=grimsby%20live&src=typd

I do not ride a great big Mercian, gangster tanwalls, fixed cog in the back.

ian

  • fatuously disingenuous
    • The Suburban Survival Guide
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #2089 on: January 15, 2020, 04:12:44 pm »
Yep, the lack of a direct train service is the only thing holding them back. That and KX was out of halal pasties on the day they had planned and it's a long journey without a pasty.

I used to go to Cleethorpes when I was three (so don't really remember it) because my mum's sister lived there. My mum has loads of black and white pictures of me being dragged around and her being very pregnant* (my father evidently didn't go anywhere even then). For another couple of years afterwards, I believed that Cleethorpes was genuinely devoid of colour, like the things on TV (I had a Philips black and white portable, awesome).

*spooky dead sister, which I also didn't realise for quite a while.
!nataS pihsroW

Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #2090 on: January 15, 2020, 09:26:43 pm »
Just imagine the improvements a big Muslamic bomb could make to Grimsby.
Never tell me the odds.

Cudzoziemiec

  • Waking up now, put the kettle on!
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #2091 on: January 15, 2020, 10:11:59 pm »
As someone pointed out, there are people in London who are now trembling in their boots at the thought of direct trains bringing hordes of Grimsbyites. (I'm sure Grimsby's very nice but as I have cousins who used to live in Hull, I'm duty bound to diss it.)
I do not ride a great big Mercian, gangster tanwalls, fixed cog in the back.

Jaded

  • The Codfather
  • Formerly known as Jaded
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #2092 on: January 15, 2020, 11:13:00 pm »
Grimsby.  The clue is in the name.
If you don't like your democracy, vote against it.

Mr Larrington

  • A bit ov a lyv wyr by slof standirds
  • Custard Wallah
    • Mr Larrington's Automatic Diary
Re: Little Eye On The Provinces
« Reply #2093 on: January 16, 2020, 11:28:27 am »
Nobody wants to go to Grimsby1.  Even people who live there don't want to go back.

1. Except for TV's Guy Martin, who is Not Right in the Head.
External Transparent Wall Inspection Operative & Mayor of Mortagne-au-Perche
Satisfying the Bloodlust of the Masses in Peacetime