Author Topic: Perfectly Sensible Child Utterances  (Read 71407 times)

TJG

Re: Perfectly Sensible Child Utterances
« Reply #500 on: March 21, 2019, 09:42:39 pm »
"Daddy. I have put these things on the stairs.  Some are uppers and some are downers."
This is a perfectly sensible sentence, we knew exactly what she meant, at 6 she clearly did not have a varied collection of recreational narcotics.  It only took about 5 minutes before my wife or I could breathe again!

Cudzoziemiec

  • Eating all the pies and drinking all the tea.
Re: Perfectly Sensible Child Utterances
« Reply #501 on: March 21, 2019, 09:46:35 pm »
Things to go upstairs and downstairs? Sorted! Literally...
Days become simply the spaces between dreams, spaces between the shifting floors of time...

Re: Perfectly Sensible Child Utterances
« Reply #502 on: April 01, 2019, 08:52:19 am »
When kids tell jokes, part 193...

Andrew: What did one maths book say to another maths book?
Mummy: I don't know, Andrew, what did one maths book say to another maths book?
Andrew: "Tell me about your problems!  Haha!"
Mummy: Haha!  Andrew, do you know why that's funny?
Andrew: (sheepishly) Because maths books can't talk!

 ;D

Re: Perfectly Sensible Child Utterances
« Reply #503 on: April 29, 2019, 06:54:25 pm »
Miss Dan the Younger was suggesting bunking off to protest Trump.
Miss Dan the Elder pointed out that getting photographed and recognised would get her into trouble.
“I’ll just wear a mask” says the younger.
So proud :D

Cudzoziemiec

  • Eating all the pies and drinking all the tea.
Re: Perfectly Sensible Child Utterances
« Reply #504 on: May 26, 2019, 04:52:39 pm »
"One, two, three, four, six, seven, eight, ten, eleven, twelve, hundred, nineteen, twenty, sixty. Coming, ready or not!"
It was interesting to see the different seeking styles of the two smalls, aged about three. The one whose counting is above made a great show of looking in all sorts of places she could see the other one wasn't and walking past the place she could easily see he was. When it was his turn, he counted quickly and went straight to where she was obviously hiding. They were both of the "crouch under a table and call it hiding" school.
Days become simply the spaces between dreams, spaces between the shifting floors of time...

Wowbagger

  • Dez's butler
    • Musings of a Gentleman Cyclist
Re: Perfectly Sensible Child Utterances
« Reply #505 on: December 03, 2019, 09:54:57 pm »
"I wish people at my school wouldn't call him Santa Claus! That's American. We're British. He's Father Christmas!"

So said my gd, aged 9 years and 5 months.
Eating's a serious business. Don't bollocks around wagging your tail.

Re: Perfectly Sensible Child Utterances
« Reply #506 on: January 17, 2020, 11:46:59 am »
Now.......shall we discuss pudding - My 6 year old who would get thrashed for her impertinence if I want laughing so hard at her delivery of the aforementioned

Re: Perfectly Sensible Child Utterances
« Reply #507 on: January 28, 2020, 09:30:24 pm »
Does it matter that they are thirty and send you a meme on WhatsApp? No? good.

"Having a daughter is like having a broke best friend who thinks you're rich"

T42

  • Old fool in a hurry
Re: Perfectly Sensible Child Utterances
« Reply #508 on: January 29, 2020, 08:28:55 am »
Does it matter that they are thirty and send you a meme on WhatsApp? No? good.

"Having a daughter is like having a broke best friend who thinks you're rich"

You too, huh?  Take courage, it doesn't stop at 30. Or 40.
I've dusted all those old bottles and set them up straight.

Re: Perfectly Sensible Child Utterances
« Reply #509 on: January 29, 2020, 07:34:00 pm »
Does it matter that they are thirty and send you a meme on WhatsApp? No? good.

"Having a daughter is like having a broke best friend who thinks you're rich"

You too, huh?  Take courage, it doesn't stop at 30. Or 40.

That's seriously depressing! Ours is just 18, but I already can't wait for her to earn a living and stop asking for money!

A

Basil

  • Um....err......oh bugger!
  • Help me!
Re: Perfectly Sensible Child Utterances
« Reply #510 on: January 29, 2020, 07:43:53 pm »

That's seriously depressing! Ours is just 18, but I already can't wait for her to earn a living and stop asking for money!


*falls on the floor, laughing*
Quote from: Kim
And remember that friends who organise things on Facebook aren't proper friends anyway.

Re: Perfectly Sensible Child Utterances
« Reply #511 on: March 09, 2020, 10:12:27 am »
On telling my 6yo that his 6yo cousin also plays chess:
"Is Toby a Grandmaster too?"

Cudzoziemiec

  • Eating all the pies and drinking all the tea.
Re: Perfectly Sensible Child Utterances
« Reply #512 on: April 29, 2020, 07:31:03 pm »
He's way too old for this thread really, but where else would I put this? Tells me his history teacher used to say "If you don't like the syllabus, don't blame me, blame Michael Gove."
Days become simply the spaces between dreams, spaces between the shifting floors of time...

hellymedic

  • Just do it!
Re: Perfectly Sensible Child Utterances
« Reply #513 on: May 18, 2020, 10:30:20 pm »
'Yesterday, you were a square; today you're a prime number.'

Nephew (who can't write yet) dictating text of birthday card to his mother, for older sister to write out.