The Honourable Member for the 18th Century has called a press conference.
“l have a statement l would like to read.
“On Tuesday night, following a late meeting at party headquarters, l decided to go for a relaxing drive through the Liverpool area. Whilst there, l saw a young blonde lady on the side of the road.
“l felt it my duty to stop and offer her a lift. During the journey, l pulled over into a nearby alleyway so that l could safely reach into the glove compartment and take out a Murray Mint.
“At this point, l fell on top of her and, l regret to say, a part of my body accidentally entered her.
‘“Nanny was obviously very cross and I was confined to the nursery for 2 days. As far as l'm concerned that is the end of the matter.
“Thank you.”
With thanks to Little Britain
