A random thread for small things that don't really warrant a thread of their own

[rafletcher]

...and more fireworks. It's 2pm on a gloriously bright and sunny day.

Celtic v Rangers?

[Mrs Pingu]

We've got some noisy piece of machinery somewhere. Haven't figured out what or where.

[Mrs Pingu]

Welsh Lolrus!
https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2021/mar/21/rspca-arctic-walrus-spotted-off-south-wales

[Mr Larrington]

ISTR a walrus rocking up in Shetland a couple of years ago but Waleslandshire is a whole new wossname.  What next, narwhals in the Thames Estuary?

[spesh]

Welsh Lolrus!
https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2021/mar/21/rspca-arctic-walrus-spotted-off-south-wales

O hai, ydych chi wedi gweld fy bukkit?

[Mrs Pingu]

 

[Mrs Pingu]

Thought that those of you amused by my occasional insertions of Scots or Doric terms maybe amused by some of the words here.
Including, but not limited to:

Tune in yourself and you might hear phrases like “Fit like?” (How are you?) and “gie’s a bosie” (give me a hug). Or words such as fair forfochan (exhausted), loon (a boy), quine (a girl), contermaschious (argumentative) or vratch (a nuisance). A personal favourite is foggie bummer (bumble bee). Then, in keeping with the north-east’s damp climate, there are at least 20 words to describe rain (pick from dreich, drookit and smirr, also frequently used in Scots), sough (for the sound of the wind), plooter (for splash in mud), hummel dodies (for fingerless mittens) and curious terms like cappie (ice-cream cone), fooge (play truant) and hallyrackit (disorganised).

http://www.bbc.com/travel/story/20210321-scotlands-little-known-fourth-language

[tiermat]

Thought that those of you amused by my occasional insertions of Scots or Doric terms maybe amused by some of the words here.
Including, but not limited to:

Tune in yourself and you might hear phrases like “Fit like?” (How are you?) and “gie’s a bosie” (give me a hug). Or words such as fair forfochan (exhausted), loon (a boy), quine (a girl), contermaschious (argumentative) or vratch (a nuisance). A personal favourite is foggie bummer (bumble bee). Then, in keeping with the north-east’s damp climate, there are at least 20 words to describe rain (pick from dreich, drookit and smirr, also frequently used in Scots), sough (for the sound of the wind), plooter (for splash in mud), hummel dodies (for fingerless mittens) and curious terms like cappie (ice-cream cone), fooge (play truant) and hallyrackit (disorganised).

http://www.bbc.com/travel/story/20210321-scotlands-little-known-fourth-language

IIRC there was a section in one of Susan Calman's programmes where she met an expert in Doric.  It was amazing how many words are widely used, not just in Scots English but in english as a whole, that come from the language.

[Mr Larrington]

Thought that those of you amused by my occasional insertions of Scots or Doric terms maybe amused by some of the words here.
Including, but not limited to:

Tune in yourself and you might hear phrases like “Fit like?” (How are you?) and “gie’s a bosie” (give me a hug). Or words such as fair forfochan (exhausted), loon (a boy), quine (a girl), contermaschious (argumentative) or vratch (a nuisance). A personal favourite is foggie bummer (bumble bee). Then, in keeping with the north-east’s damp climate, there are at least 20 words to describe rain (pick from dreich, drookit and smirr, also frequently used in Scots), sough (for the sound of the wind), plooter (for splash in mud), hummel dodies (for fingerless mittens) and curious terms like cappie (ice-cream cone), fooge (play truant) and hallyrackit (disorganised).

http://www.bbc.com/travel/story/20210321-scotlands-little-known-fourth-language

My grate frend Hairy McSteve, who was both a native of Furryboottoon and the son of a meteorologist, once told us “it's splotting” as we gazed morosely out of the window of a Danish petrol station caff at what the rest of us thought was just rain.

“Out, damned Splot!” quipped Mr Larrington before being clouted upside the head with a Zéfal HPX.

[Basil]

Mrs B is furious.  She can't get a hair appointment anywhere within the locality before mid June.  Yet I just got an appointment at the local barbers for three days from now. 

(Wales. Hairdressers re opened last week)

[tiermat]

Mrs B is furious.  She can't get a hair appointment anywhere within the locality before mid June.  Yet I just got an appointment at the local barbers for three days from now. 

(Wales. Hairdressers re opened last week)

I called the usual barber's, yesterday, expecting to be told "Oh the first appointment we have is in May".  Instead I got "Well the morning is all booked up, but we can fit you in at 12:30 on the 12th, is that OK?"

[T42]

Hair?  Oh yes, I remember hair.

[Jasmine]

Mrs B is furious.  She can't get a hair appointment anywhere within the locality before mid June.  Yet I just got an appointment at the local barbers for three days from now. 

(Wales. Hairdressers re opened last week)

Ah yes, that's because anyone who had an appointment during the lockdown will have been phoned to rearrange it before anyone else can get a slot. So that's 4 months of lockdown appointments (minus the ones that are women who go every 4-6 weeks so would have wanted 2-3 appointments in that time).

[Mr Larrington]

Hair?  Oh yes, I remember hair.

I remember haircuts.  Hopefully the PTSD will wear off eventually.

[Beardy]

Teaching #1 son to drive ‘ready’ for his emergency booked test tomorrow. Like his mother he’s a control junkie, has NO sense of direction or spatial awareness and the short term memory of a gold fish. He’s the only person I know who can get lost on a roundabout, even one he’s already been around with no problems. 

It’s all very frustrating especially to this spatially aware, direction sensitive ambiguity loving tech minded individual.

[Beardy]

Gah! I’m at least as nervous as he is. He doesn’t do exam nerves usually, but this one is testing more than his branes and I think he’s a lot nervous which is something of a novelty for him.

[Beardy]

Stressful, this waiting.

[Hot Flatus]

https://twitter.com/Laughs_4_All/status/1374564207207841792?s=20

[Beardy]

I do believe I’m developing a cold, the first one this year. I wonder where I got it from.
I hate having a cold, mainly because Dr Beardy is especially unsympathetic towards the cough I always develop post cold.

[ian]

This is how messaging works in my house.

Wife: do you want to buy a barn?
Me: Who hasn't wanted a barn. Yes, let's buy a barn. Where is it?
Wife: Surrey
Me: Cool, barns make tornados angry. No tornados in Surrey. How much?
Wife: it's £180,000.
Me: [censored]
Wife: Well, I think it's a big barn.
Me: Does it include cows?
Wife: No, it's just a big shed. That's what barns are. We don't need cows.
Me: How big?
Wife: Barn-big.
Me: that's not a helpful measure of barn size.
Wife: do I look like an expert on barns?
[Long pause]
Me: your uncle is a sheep farmer. He has a barn. That's barn expertise. My family are miners and carnies.
Wife: DO YOU WANT TO BUY A BARN? [actual capitals]

I think she has beer up there.

[Mrs Pingu]

Reading your thread.
Thinks your wife is referring to a "Barn". As in one of those done out jobs with oaks beams and luxuries a la Grand Designs.
Sees £180,000.
Realises it's a big metal shed.
 

[Kim]

Reading your thread.
Thinks your wife is referring to a "Barn". As in one of those done out jobs with oaks beams and luxuries a la Grand Designs.
Sees £180,000.
Realises it's a big metal shed.
 

To be fair, the proper Grand Designs barn would be a big metal shed.  Or more likely a wooden one with fungus problems and Scheduled Ancient Monument status.  And they'd spend a year getting pregnant in a caravan while a team of enthusiastic tradesmen construct an over-engineered eco-barn and order the wrong sized windows from bespoke manufacturers in Germany, and then break them and run out of money.

[Ashaman42]

I want a workshop - if you buy a barn can I fill it with machine tools and tinker?

[Mr Larrington]

None of which addresses why ian's wife would think he might want to buy a barn at all, either with or without cows.  I think there’s something we're not being told, like whether there’s a plan in the offing to establish a BEAR Sanctuary.

[Mrs Pingu]

As someone who has been perusing a lot of property porn recently.  What I don't understand is how come a plot of land costs almost as much as an actual house?